A/N - Enjoy the chappy for your face. Sorry its a bit short. I guess its a breather from that long party chap I made you read
DISCLAIMER - I do not own Naruto
Song used for this chapter - Johnny Ripper- Julia (Catacombkid Edit)
"Ugh," I huffed out angrily while tossing my phone onto my lap in frustration.
Tayuya shifted. From the corner of my eyes I could see her watching me quietly, frown tugging ever so slightly and no doubt a few choice words at the tip of her tongue. But as expected, when she willed it so, she had immense powers of self control. Instead of speaking, she remained silent and focused back on the road we were driving down.
No, she wouldn't say a single word, and I knew she never would again. Not on her own. Not about this.
The last time she thought about treading within the murky pool of anger I had for situations dealing with my incredibly shitty boyfriend was the night I told her to fuck off. Though she didn't run away, I doubt she could forget my attitude from back then. It was different now, I might snap and snarl but... it didn't matter.
She learns from her mistakes.
And some people simply don't.
When the silence stretched, she slipped her eyes to me quietly again. My seething hadn't let up, and I was hoping she would ask, but she had me figured out so well that I'm sure she knew exactly what I was so pissed about. I mean, it's because of it reoccurring in my day to day schedule that Tayuya had became my reliable source of transportation to begin with. Of course she knew.
Of course I, once again, looked like an idiot for hoping.
And of course I, once again, was let down.
"Do you know what the definition of insanity is?" I mumbled out before I knew I was even talking. My eyes wandered out the window, watching the speeding pine trees passing by as I continued, "Doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting something different to happen."
I paused and the silence lingered. Sighing, I continued to stare at one tree after the other, each passing in fluid movements sane motion, "It isn't that I expect something different... I guess what disappoints me is that each and every time he blows me off, it sounds easier for him to do. And... I just kind of hoped he..."
I didn't finish, I couldn't. The thoughts in my head were pathetic enough, but saying it out loud was like forcing acid down my throat. The sour taste in my mouth felt heavy and all I could do was glare a hole in the window with my lead tongue settling restlessly. I regretted saying anything; what point was there to looking even more like an idiot?
"We must expect finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope," Tayuya finally spoke in a quiet leveled tone. I glanced up at her in silence, watching her set jaw strain and fingers tighten against the wheel. While she seemed to be struggling, she spoke unbelievably calmly, "He's an idiot, but that doesn't make you one for wanting something different to happen. Obviously people of famous origin have understood things like this take time, so I'm guessing we should understand that too... right?"
For some reason a smile slipped my lips. Looking away and watching the trees, I muttered, "Yeah, I guess so."
It was quiet for a moment before she asked casually, "Do you want to go to the store?"
"Yeah," I nodded, smile still at my lips, "I have to stack on food."
"Good, 'cuz I do too."
And after that gloriously short conversation, she didn't bother saying anything else for the rest of the ride, and she didn't need to. It was comfortable enough just having her there.
X
I had decided to help Tayuya with her bags first, seeing as her floor came before mine while riding up the elevator. She offered to do it all on her own, but secretly I didn't want to pass up another chance to visit her place again. So we both shuffled down the hall with are arms weighed down with whatever we found interesting at the store.
But came to a standstill when we finally reached her door.
"Fuck," she cursed silently with a small frown beginning to pull at her lips.
"What?" I huffed, starting to become out of breath as I stood behind her.
"My keys," she explained while looking apologetic, "They are in my pocket."
I gave her a look of exasperation, "Ugh, seriously?"
"Unfortunately," she sighed out before suggesting, "Here, you put down your bags and unlock the door. If I put this shit down now I swear its going to stay out here for the rest of the night."
I rolled my eyes and began sliding my arms filled with bags down to the ground, "Lame. Which pocket?"
"Front one," she answered. When I gave her a look, she went on, "Hoodie pocket, dork. Hurry the hell up."
"Whoa there. Hostility." I said in my fake white girl voice, flipping my hair, "No need. Take it a step back."
"Ino I promise you if you don't hurry the fuck up I'm going to-"
"What?" I teased with a grin spreading, "Going to lock me out? Oh wait, we still are."
"Ino," she warned, growl only causing me to snicker.
"Ooh, scary voice," I taunted, coming from behind and wiggling my fingers past her hips and waist as I dug into her hoodie, "Better hurry before Yuyabear drops all the bags."
Leaning closer and pressing against Tayuya's shoulder, I stuck the keys in the doorknob while in my awkward position and managed to unlock it. As soon as the faint click passed my ears, Tayuya kicked the door open and made her way to the kitchen, barely making it before she dropped everything to the floor.
"Weeeak," I sang under my breath, none too quietly. She gave me narrowed eyes as I merely smiled sweetly in return.
Glaring for a second longer, she silently made her way to the rest of the bags in the hall. I moved to help her, but not before poking her side in a failed attempt to get her to drop the second load. Quickly dashing away from her swat, I went back to my best behavior. She was beginning to growl low under her breath, and I knew it was only a matter of time before she kicked me out for the night.
We were quiet while I helped Tayuya start putting things in the cabinet and refrigerator, all while I hummed a familiar tune that had always been my favorite since the moment I met her. In my silly, overly sentimental mind, I liked to think it was our song. The first song she played in her hippie machine while stealing me away from yet another ditching disaster that had become my daily ever so predictable life. Clear as day I could hear her grumbling about 'tis the season' in her unclever attempt to hide the fact that she was worried to leave me out there, stranded, for what could have been another two hours. All the while I complained, too embarrassed to admit how grateful I was.
A smile slipped my lips as the memory passed my mind. From back then, she hadn't changed, yet at the same time was completely different from when I first met her.
The song I had been humming suddenly began playing on a speaker from the other side of her apartment. Glancing back, I saw Tayuya give a small smile before placing her phone on the counter and shuffling through more bags. My eyes lingered on the device, not quite catching the background before it locked. With a sudden wave of curiosity, I asked before bothering to stop myself,"So, that girl... how long were you guys together?"
Mid grab of a bag, Tayuya paused. It was only for an instant, but I noticed as she flowed smoothly again with her back facing me. It was quiet for a moment, and was grateful for the music to fill the void. Just before I was about to chicken out, she answered. But her tone was a dash from indifferent, and the steel behind her voice was warning, "Her name is Sari, and it doesn't matter does it?"
I bit my lip, cringing slightly at the ice I was treading on. This wasn't my area to trespass in, I knew that and Tayuya was reminding me of it. Unable to help myself, I cautiously went on, "Well it's just... We're always talking about my boyfriend, but I didn't know you were going out with someone when we first met."
"I wasn't," she replied, voice carefully leveled and controlled, "When we first met, me and her had already broke up."
My eyebrows came together at the revelation, mind wandering to the day of me sitting in the shade, a song playing in my ears and a girl smiling on a phone screen, "You guys... were already apart?"
"Yup."
"But," I began, my confusion slipping aloud. As I paused, Tayuya turned to face me, eyebrow raising while she silently waited. Mouth closing, I shook my head and looked away, "Nothing. I just assumed..."
"Yeah well, no," she sighed out while turning to continue putting things away, "We were together for a while, then we broke up. Months later I see you sitting all lonely and pathetic at the park bench with no ride and no cash."
Despite her obvious short annoyed answer, a smile slipped my lips, "Ooh, and how you came storming in like a knight, sweeping me away with your muttering curses of telling me to shut up and heart pounding promises to drag me away by my feet."
"I think you remember it a bit differently then I do," she replied, smile in her voice as she shut the refrigerator.
Bumping her hip as I went to stand next to her, I pressed, "No , I'm pretty sure that's exactly how it went."
"Well gee, Ino. I'm no expert-" she began.
"Nope, you sure aren't, so you can stop talking now," I cut off, grin spilling onto my lips sweetly. She laughed as I bounced away.
"So," I began, peaking back at her cautiously, "How long were you guys together for?"
Her sigh was heavy as she asked, "Why so curious all of the sudden?"
The question spread a small smile to my lips, "Because its our center. Why else would I stick around?"
An amused smile spread her lips as well before she sighed and rolled her eyes, "Of course... We were together for over a year."
"Oh," I blinked, surprised. My guess was three months, if not shorter. I hadn't expected to hear that they had been together for so long. A frown pulled my lips as I thought about it a little more, memories of Tayuya's smiles and Sari's teasing coming back to mind, "Well, do you mind me asking what happened?"
"Yes," she answered bluntly, but right after sighed again and waved me off, "Idunno. College. We got busy. One day we were talking about it, the next it was over. Nothing overly complicated."
If there was something that I had learned in the months of being friends with Tayuya, it was sensing the shuddering cool aura she placed around herself whenever breaching any subject that invested anything more than a grunt and a head nod. Her nonchalant shrugs, indifferent short answers, guarded casual smiles, all came so naturally it seemed second nature. And to any given eye, it would be hard to catch, someone passing by would just peg it as her being a distant person and follow suit. Yet...
It was when she brushed things off that caused me to slowly lose grip on my temper.
Frown pulling at my lips, I watched her as she began grabbing bags and crumbling in her hand. No longer fearing the thin ice under my feet, I asked "So it was mutual?"
"Hm?" Tayuya hummed while grabbing more bags, moving in her usual coasting manner.
"You guys breaking up; It was a mutual thing? Just sat down one day and decided to cut things short because college and the terror of classes taking up so much time?" I explained, watching her closely.
A lazy smile pulled at her lips, but her eyes stayed focused on what she was doing, "Unfortunately things weren't that simple."
"Then what happened?" I pressed.
Her shoulders pulled in a shrug, voice dripping in her apathetic answer, "Pretty much what you said, but of course there was more talking involved."
"So she wanted to stay together?" I asked, fishing impatiently in her pool of short answers.
A twitch of a frown touched her lips before she gave a small laugh and sighed, "Ah no. As twisted as this must seem to you, she's the one that broke up with me."
That halted me all together. For some unknown reason, in the back of my mind, I had assumed she was feeding me answers that I wanted to hear, lying as easily as ever. And past the doubts that were microscopic, I assumed if she was telling the truth she was the one who broke up with Sari. Why it as a shock to me, I wasn't sure. But thoughts of the party during break lingered in memory, and watching Tayuya's guarded grins made it unmistakable.
My pause gave Tayuya time to carefully stow all her crumbled plastic bags under the sink. Turning to me, she smiled, "What? Too shocked to believe it? I know I'm good looking and all, but-"
"Why did you guys really break up?" I asked abruptly.
Her eyebrows came together in confusion, "What? I just told you."
"Was that the only reason?" I went on, unable to believe it to be true.
She gave an awkward laugh while giving me a weird look, "Yeah, honestly it was. She came up to me one day and explained it, and I couldn't argue with her because it was true. College was sucking us dry, we decided to go on a break."
"A break?" I repeated, seeming to latch onto the words, "A break as in 'pause to our relationship' type break? As in you guys are most likely going to get back together?"
"I mean at first, I'm sure that's what we meant," she explained while rubbing the back of her neck, seeming to think deeply about it, "But. Idunno. I don't see us getting back together you know?"
"Why?"
Her smiles started to flatter, "Because being apart tends to set people in a certain perspective. There's no point going back out if we couldn't even handle this one speed bump."
"College taking up too much time isn't a speed bump, it's an obvious fucking cause and effect in attending an University," I said in utter disbelief.
"Is there a reason you are taking this to heart?" She asked with her frown pulling even more, "I mean I know it happened to us, but you and that dopey boyfriend of yours have been copping with it way longer than we were. You guys should be fine."
"No it isn't that! It's just-"I opened my mouth to storm out words of reason, but nothing came. The only thing I managed to say after stumbling was, "Because Tayuya I just... It's no secret you don't like to actually talk to me and-"
"Wait, what?" She cut off in utter confusion. Laughing, she went on, "We freaking talk everyday-"
"No, what I mean is that- I'm just confused," I rushed out, struggling to connect words, "Something like that doesn't sound... valid."
"I guess it is a stupid reason to break up," she agreed with a nod, but then shrugged, "But yeah. That's how it is. She was right. We couldn't afford losing any more sleep as it was back then."
"Did you... did you want to stay with her?" I asked slowly, eyes pulling up to hers.
Her frown was small as she answered, "I thought I did..."
Before I could ask any more questions, she began gathering my bags to help me take it all upstairs. As always we were quiet but all around us it felt cold, like the winter air outside. Despite my pestering though, she stayed over at my place for an hour after helping me put everything away. We talked about what we usually talked about, which was nothing, and watched TV until she said her goodnight and headed back downstairs.
In the bed under my sheets, still cold and too restless to sleep, everything she had said that night rolled around in my head. Every memory of her laugh, her smile, her shrug, seemed to make me frown even more as it replayed in my mind. I couldn't see it, the distance, the walls, but an ever looming feeling always lingered. No I couldn't see it, couldn't trust my eyes to form an image, but I could feel it. It was there.
Just before closing my eyes, heavy with worry but heavier with sleep, I messaged her something that had bugged me since the moment the words so indifferently left her lips.
Did she know?
It wasn't until hours until her reply pinged me awake before I drifted back to sleep.
...I wish she hadn't.
(1) Brought it back from a previous chap. I like it.
Alright here you go. I wanted to post this sooner to show my gratitude with a certain sneaky ninja. *Quickly glances behind me* I feel like they are close. Watching. Waiting. To attack me if I don't start popping these chapters out faster.
So in good faith of your friendly threat, I leave this here as an investment of our peaceful living agreements: I make you happy, you don't find me and take me out with your ninja stars. Deelz? Dealz. Ok good.
For the rest of you thanks for the review and the support. I keep wanting to do light chappies, but this one require some depth. Its something I wanted to tackle for awhile. Stepping stones on who Tayuya is as a person and Ino's curiosity to find it all out.
Read, review, tell me what you think. I'm off to take a quick run for the night and after taking a quick shower, hop into bed and knock the hell out. Long day in the life of the Navy.
Yoohoooohooo. Shy out.
