A/N Enjoy, no Paul in this story thank you for reviewing. R&R
I didn't know if I wanted to go home or if I should just continue on my journey. If I continued on my journey I would do a half ass job exploring and not think before I do things, ending up killing myself. If I went home I don't even know if I was welcome home at all.
Maybe I only needed a break from La Push, should I leave for a few days? Weeks? Months? Years?I can't choose, maybe when I feel I'm comfortable going back. I'll never know until the day comes, but until then I wait. The day I can except that people love me, the day I can except people actually want me around.
That's when I'll go back.
I sobbed as I continued to walk in the darkness, I only got about 3 hours of sleep at Jacob's. I didn't know how much longer I'd be able to go on. I stuck my thumb out, by now I was at the road. Someone honked and I got in the car. "Where to darling?" The friendly looking woman asked shaking.
"Gas station please." I smiled at her. She looked like she was in her 60's, she wasn't shaking because she was scared, she was old. "Where you from?"
"Alaska." I smiled at her.
"Really now!?" She looked surprised, she didn't keep her storm coloured eyes on me for long. She watched the road. "I've wanted to go there one time in my life, but I feared it would be to cold for me."
"Oh yes, it's very cold" I smiled and listened to her laugh.
"Why did you come all the way down here?" She asked after about 5 minutes of silence. Most old people didn't like silence I guess.
"I've always wanted to travel the world, and I was recently... interrupted." I couldn't think of the right word, so I picked the first one that came to my mind.
"You traveled all by yourself, it isn't safe for a young girl like you to be out here. Something horrible could have happened to you." She stated worriedly.
"I was with someone after about 7 months, but I just stopped traveling with him today." I stated, she just nodded her head.
"My name is Mrs. Luvnore"
"Eden"
"So what's at a gas station?" Mrs. Luvnore asked me pulling into the gas station.
"Pay phone." I smiled at her. "I'm going to call my dad and mom."
"Whens the last time you talked to them darling?" She asked
"The day before I left" I bit my lip, I saw sadness in her eyes. "I hope that you can get a hold of him." I nodded at her and thanked her for driving me down here.
I pulled the money out of my backpack, dialing the number that used to be mine. "Hello?" I heard a deep man voice, it sounded like my dad.
"Malcolm Clairinton?" I asked with a serious voice, I bit my lip holding back my tears. I didn't want it to not be him. He replied with a yes. "Dad?" I burst into tears.
"ELIZABETH!" He sound so relieved. "I've miss you so much, where have you been. Are you okay? What's wrong!?" He was pouring questions.
"Yeah, it's me dad" I sobbed "I've missed you so much too, I've been backpacking around the world. I'm in Washinton. I'm just so happy to talk to you."
"Why did you leave honey?" he asked, I think I could hear him crying too.
"Didn't my note fill it in?" I asked, a small smile appearing on my face. He always forgot about things.
"Yeah, but why?"
"I just wanted to feel free. I wanted to be gone with the wind, I wanted adventures, I wanted to earn things all by myself dad. I didn't want the things you were offering me. I love you, how's mom?" I asked
He didn't reply "...Dad? No" More tears fell from my eyes, this is the most I've cried ever! That I could remember anyways.
"I love you too honey, and I'm sure your mother loved you too."
"No, no no no. Loved, dad no!" I sobbed "You can't mean, she's dead" I croaked putting my hand over my mouth. Tears poured out of my eyes.
"She was horrified when you left home"
"I killed her?" I squeaked hitting my head against the pay phone wall. I put some more money into the pay phone.
"No, honey. Don't say that, she was already sick. It just made her more stressed out, the doctor said she wouldn't live more than a month." My dad said trying to cheer me up.
"I killed her, don't denie it dad. You know I did!" I exclaimed.
"Honey, darling. You were growning up, we knew you were going to leave sooner or later."
"Yeah, but normally when people leave they tell their family face to face!" I shouted nearly choking.
We began talking a bit more after I calmed down. "Meet any guys on the way down there?" He asked
"Yeah, this guy named Chris, I found him on my travels and took him with me because he was dieing, he's a jerk. I made some friends in La Push, but Chris pissed me off and I ran away. I met a guy named Paul too" I sobbed again. "And I just up and left because I ran away from my problems like I always do, Oh god I'm such a horrible person!"
"Honey, it's a natural thing, don't worry." My dad said "You don't need to come home, go stay with a friend or something, call me and I'll mail you some money."
"Okay, thanks dad. I doubt anyone wants me anymore." My lip trembled, the whole pack probably hated me for abandoning Paul like that. I hate myself too.
"Didn't the Cullens move to Forks?" My dad asked.
"Yeah, they did! Maybe I can stay with them! Bye dad, I love you!"
"They will, trust me. Even Rosalie liked you" My dad chuckled "Bye honey, I love you too."
I hung up the phone and picked up my bag as I headed down the road sticking out my thumb again hoping that someone would drive by and be nice enough to take me to Forks hospital.
