Brotherhood Evolution, the Early Years: School Supplies
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The 'Hood House™®©
"Morning." Betsy said as she walked into the kitchen. Lance was sitting down, drinking his coffee while Blob was making breakfast. "Same old, same old." Betsy thought
"So. How are you holding up?" Lance asked.
"Fine." Betsy said simply as she poured herself a glass of OJ.
"You sure?" Blob asked. "Mike said that guy really freaked you out last night." Blob said, bringing up the Party they had crashed last night.
"Boys, I'm a trained assassin. Do you seriously think some high school drunk is going to shake me up?" Betsy asked as she arched an eyebrow. " I knew Mike was right at the door. I let that retard hit me and acted all innocent and fragile." Betsy said with a smirk. "Like a delicate Bloody flower." Betsy said with southern accent as she put a hand to her chest.
"You do like it when the boy plays hero." Blob smirked.
"Every girl wants to be a princess rescued by the prince." Betsy sighed. "To bad he's dumber then a sack of bricks. If I was any more obvious last night I would have had to grab him and drag him into the bedroom." Betsy muttered. "And he still didn't make a move."
"What's up yo?" Todd asked as he hopped into the room.
"Betsy is enlightening us about how Mike is stupid." Lance cracked.
"Christ. Do I have to come out and kiss him in the park or something?" Betsy asked annoyed. "Sometimes I wonder…"
"So-do-I." Pietro asked as he sped into the room. "Why-go-after-angst-boy-when-you-can-have-a-hunk-like-me?' Pietro asked as he struck a few poses.
"Please. I like my men with more maturity than a three year old." Betsy said as she drank her OJ.
"The why are you going after Mike again?" Fred asked.
"Well…" Betsy began before she thought about it. "Hm. Good point." Betsy mused.
"I heard my name." Mike said as he walked into the room, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Who do I have to kill?"
"Pietro." Lance quipped.
"Duh." Mike replied simply. "So why you guys mentioning me?"
"Well. We were talking about how stupid you are when it comes to Bet…" Todd began before Betsy stabbed him with her psychic knife, causing him to convulse a little before he passed out.
"Why did you just stab Toad?" Mike asked as Betsy whistled.
"No reason." Betsy said sweetly as Todd twitched on the ground.
"Kay." Mike said as he sat at the table. "So. School starts next week. Are we planning on going?"
"Yerg-hety-gruh…" Toad babbled on the ground.
"Well-I-know-a-certain-boy-that-wants-to-get-stuck-up-a-tree…" Pietro mused out loud.
"I will murder you with a hatchet." Lance snapped as he held up the axe menacingly in his hands.
"Where do we get these thing?" Blob asked as he picked up his own fourteenth century war axe. "And why do we get them?"
"Acme Axe Company." Mike said simply. "I recently bought stock in them. They keep sending me free samples." Mike said as he casually threw a hatchet at Pietro, barely missing the young man.
"HEY!" Pietro screamed.
"What? I missed." Mike pointed out.
"Not on purpose." Betsy said simply.
"You stop reading my mind woman." Mike snapped. Then immediately cringed when he saw the look of murder in Betsy's eyes. "Oh crap. I had to open my mouth." Mike muttered.
"DIE!" Betsy shouted as she lunged at him.
"Yikes!" Mike screamed as the assassin threw several axes' at him, which he barely dodged as he hightailed it out of the room.
"So." Lance said, turning back to the others as Mike ran out of the room, Betsy hot on his tail. "Wanna go to the mall for school supplies?" Lance asked.
"Sounds-good." Pietro said.
"Agreed." Fred added.
"Nya-ah-gah…" Todd muttered from the floor where he was still convulsing.
"HELP ME!" Mike screamed from the other room.
"THIS IS WHY YOU DON'T INSULT NINJA'S MIKE!" Fred bellowed to him.
"TELL ME SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW!" Mike screamed. "OW! BETSY THAT REALLY FREAKING HURTS! OW! OW! OWWIE!"
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Outside the Bayville Wal-Mart
"Should we have left Toad on the ground like that?" Blob asked.
"He'll be fine in a few hours." Betsy said simply as they walked through the mall. "I hope…"
"Meh. No-big-loss." Pietro said simply.
"What was that?" Fred asked menacingly as he grabbed Pietro by the collar.
"I-hope-the-little-guy-wakes-up-without-harm…" Pietro grinned as Fred held him in the air.
"Better." Blob said as he put Pietro down.
"As amusing as that was, I'd like to get this done. I hate shopping." Mike said simply.
"Aw… don't like malls Mikey?" Betsy asked with a sugarcoated voice. Mike froze and stared daggers at her.
"Don't you ever call me that again. Got it?" Mike snarled out, his voice dripping with venom as he stormed away.
"Okay. Did I miss something?" Lance asked as the Brotherhood watched Omega storm away.
"I think we all did." Betsy said simply.
"Okay. Let's-let-little-mister-broody-over-there-brood. The-rest-of-us-have-shopping-to-do." Pietro replied simply.
"Yea. Come on Freddy, we got a list to go through." Lance said as he pulled out a roll of toilet paper that had the Brotherhood shopping list on it.
"Lance, why is it on toilet paper?" Betsy asked as she looked at the huge list.
"So we can get rid of any evidence." Lance said simply.
"Yea. That's' why I'm having burrito's tonight." Blob stated.
"Ew." Betsy grimaced. "Way to much Info. And that's still doesn't explain how we're going to pay for all this. I mean the money we stole from the Kingpin is almost gone."
"I-prefer-the-term-forced-donation." Pietro said simply.
"Still. How are we going to pay?" Betsy asked.
"Pay?" Pietro, Fred and Lance all asked. "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Aw… that's-so-funny…" Pietro laughed as h wiped tears away.
"Good one Betsy." Fred smirked.
"I better go make sure I have money for bail." Betsy muttered.
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A wee bit later, at the inside the Wall Mart.
"Toilet paper?" Lance asked.
"Thirty-four packages worth." Blob answered.
"Stink bombs?"
"Five-hundred." Pietro muttered.
"Spray paint?"
"Three cans neon green, two hot pink, four bright orange, ten each of yellow, blue, red, black and white." Blob said simply.
"That's it?" Lance asked.
"We're-trying-to-cut-back." Pietro said simply.
"Okay then. Guns?"
"Two AK47's, two D5K Dustkies, and six 9mm hand guns, all with full magazines." Betsy listed off.
"That's all?" Lance asked in shcok.
"We sold most of Mystiques stash to Libya to pay the heating bill a few months ago." Blob said simply.
"Hmp." Lance said simply. " Sell the rest to Castro. We need the lunch money. There's not going to be as many freshmen this year. Cherry bombs?"
"Four dozen." Betsy said as she flipped the bombs in her hands. "As well as thirty M-80's"
"Each one of those is a quarter stick if Dynamite, right?" Blob asked.
"Yep." Pietro smirked.
"Remind me to renew my medical insurance." Blob said simply.
"Carrying on." Lance said simply. "Video Camera?"
"Tree. With-ten-batteries-and-forty-Blank-tapes." Pietro said simply.
"Camera's?"
"Twelve disposables." Betsy said as she snapped a picture of herself.
"Walkie talkies?"
"Roger." Blob said into his Walkie-talkie.
"Over." Pietro said back into his.
"(sigh) Notebooks?" Lance continued.
"Check."
"Shaving Cream?"
"Fifty-cans-worth." Pietro said. "Hold-on, let-me-run-these-four-carts-to-the-house-real-quick." Pietro said as he disappeared with the list, and returned a few seconds later. "Okay, continue.
"Pencils with test answers on them?"
"Check." Betsy said as she looked at the pencils. "DBACBDCAB… Huh. So that's the answers to the math final."
"Nude calendar pictures of entire cheerleading squad in sexy positions?" Lance asked.
"Double-check." Pietro said as he flipped through them with a smile.
"Betsy's Bra?"
"Damn-that's-a-check." Pietro said as he held up the black satin.
"WHAT!" Betsy screamed. "HOW DID YOU…"
"Please. We've seen more when you sunbathe. Blueprints of the Bayville Mall?" Lance said going back to his checklist. Betsy swiped her bra from Pietro and shoved it down her shirt.
"Check." Blob said as he held up the blueprints. "Man, this place does sell everything."
"Black ski masks?"
"Check." Pietro said with a ski mask on.
"C-4?"
"Check." Blob said as he added it with the rest of the explosives.
"Detonators?"
"Check." Pietro said as he fiddled with the buttons on one of the detonators.
"Stop that." Betsy snapped as she took it away from him.
"Life Insurance policies."
"For Duncan, Summer's and Grey." Betsy stated as he held up the policies.
"No Daniels?" Lance asked.
"Na. It's-be-to-obvious." Pietro said simply.
"That's everything." Lance said as Pietro sped off with the cart and returned a few seconds later.
"The-Quicksilver-payment-plan-has-been-completed. Please-vacate-the-checking-counter-ASAP." Pietro smirked.
"Great. Now we just have to find Omega and get out before security decided to slow down the tapes." Lance said simply.
"Right. Where-is-the-great-depressor…" Pietro asked as he looked around.
"He was in frozen foods earlier." Betsy said simply.
"Good. That reminds me. We need groceries." Blob said simply.
"Looks-like-I'm-going-to-be-making-a-few-more-trips…" Pietro said as Blob grabbed a cart.
"Let's see here…" blob said as he took out his shopping list.
"I-wanna-ride-in-the-cart!" Pietro shouted as he hopped in the cart.
"How old are you?" Betsy asked.
"Seventeen-going-on-three." Pietro answered as he stuck out his tongue.
"Figures." Betsy said as Fred pushed the cart away, Lance walking after them. Betsy caught a familiar face in the men's section. "We'll there's the boy." Betsy said as she made her way over to Mike, who was shoving a football playing into a travel suitcase.
"Stay still. You don't have much air." Mike said simply as he zipped up the bag as Betsy walked over.
"Hey Mike." Betsy said as she approached him. "You okay?"
"I'm better now that's I've taken care of the team." Mike said as he pointed as a dozen similar bags, all of which were shaking with muffled screams coming from them.
"Creative." Betsy nodded.
"Sorry for snapping." Mike said. "Being called that brings up some bad memories." Mike said simply.
"Understandable." Betsy said simply. "Guess I'll just have to find something else to call you."
"Mike works just fine Bets." Mike said simply.
"We'll see about that. So. Which one's Duncan in?" Betsy asked.
"I forget." Mike said simply. "It's all blending in as one big thrashing." Mike replied simply.
"Meh. Like it matters." Betsy said as she looped her arm around Mikes. "Come on. The rest of the Boys are getting food, so you know there's going to be a disaster. Wanna watch?"
"Sure. I could use a few laughs." Mike said as he and Betsy walked towards the food department.
"Guaranteed." Betsy smirked.
"I hope Todd's okay." Mike said as the two walked off.
"He's fine." Betsy replied simply.
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The 'Hood House™©®
"Nya-ah-gah…" Toad muttered from the floor where he was still twitching.
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Next time on Brotherhood Evolution, the Early Years: The great Hotdog war. Bayville celebrates the end of summer with a giant town wide picnic. But what happens when the Brotherhood and X-Men argue over what makes a perfect Hotdog. Insanity ensues.
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Later all. I think you know what to do.
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