Secrets & Lies
Chapter 9
The Goodbye

Felicity
When I first arranged to have that talk with Laurel, I'll admit that I was dreading it and I wanted it to be over the second she arrived at my door but I'm glad we had our talk. She didn't excuser her actions in anyway and she didn't try and make it sound like it was all his fault, she took equal blame. She apologised, admitted she was wrong and she held her hands up to everything. I was expecting her to try make excuses or blame everything on Oliver but she didn't and that surprised me. I think it's going to be a very long time before I trust her again and accept her as any sort of friend but we had a chance to clear the air and that really helped, I think it helped both of us actually. She told me she understands what I'm going through because of her past history with Oliver and she can't believe she did it to me. Laurel was reasonable and said she would understand if I never wanted to talk to her again or be around her but she did ask if I would consider coming back to team Arrow as it wasn't the same without me.

I loved team Arrow and I have been through a lot with them and seen so many different changes and helped out with so many different cases. It was a tough choice turning my back on the team and keeping away from it but it's what I need to do. I haven't forgiven Laurel and Oliver for what they did, I still have so much anger towards both of them and the last thing I need to see is Laurel in her skin tight outfit and Oliver with his muscles out and them being around each other. I'm doing this for my own sanity. I don't want Laurel or Oliver to get hurt but do I really want to see them caring for each other out in the field if one of them gets into trouble? Do I really want to see Oliver stitching up Laurel after she gets hurt? I really do not want to see them together again and asking them to move away from team arrow is wrong of me. Oliver is the founder of the team and it's all down to him this started and Laurel is out there beating up the bad guys. Also, I know if we asked Laurel to stay away from the team she would just sneak out there.

Right now I feel alone and although Oliver is around every spare second he can get and he's working hard to try and get things back on track, I just don't feel like I have anyone to talk to about any of this. Since the whole thing happened everyone has pretty much kept their distance as they don't want to get involved or be seen as taking sides, which I get. I just wish someone was here that I could talk to and someone that would listen and let me rant. The only person who I knew would answer the phone if I called would be my mother and I really don't think speaking to her is the best thing to do. She'll just tell me 'I told you so' all men are worthless, no man can be trusted and no man is good enough for me.

Believe me there are times that I've wanted to tell Oliver that I don't want anything to do with him anymore because I can't get over what he did but then I think about all the good times with Oliver, I know that we can have them again. This is just a rocky patch that we're going through and we'll be able to get through it… I hope. Some couples have been through so much worse and they've come out the other side and led happy lives with one another. That's what I tell myself anyway but I don't know if I'll get my happy ever after, maybe it's just not in the cards for me but I will never forgive myself if I don't try. I don't like questioning what if… I've done it once before and it nearly drove me insane.

Oliver knows that if he steps another toe out of line with me then he's gone for good.

My phone started ringing, I looked at the caller ID and saw Oliver's name flashing up. Speak of the devil.

"Hi" I said as I answered.

"Hi" He replied "Look I need to come and talk to you about something. Is it ok if I come over?" He asked.

"Yeah I'm home. The door's unlocked so just let yourself in" I told him.

"Ok, I'll be over in a few minutes" He said.

I wonder what he has to talk to me about? I hope it's not bad news, I don't think I can take anymore bad news. Lots of things were going through my head.

Was it about team Arrow?
Was it about Laurel?
Was it about Oliver?
Was it about one of my friends?
Has someone from our past come back to haunt us?
He didn't sound happy when he called, it sounded like something serious.

The door knob turned and I looked up to see Oliver walk in. I was sitting at the table with my laptop trying to get on with some work but I closed the lid of the laptop as Oliver came and sat down opposite me. He gave me a smile that told me he was nervous and put his hands on the table.

"What's the matter?" I asked him.

"Nothing's the matter so to speak. There's just something I wanted to tell you" He said.

"What is it?"

"We got a distress call from Sara. She's in a lot of trouble. Laurel and Thea are going to go help her but I don't think Laurel is going to come back. She said she missed her sister and she feels bad not being there for her and being able to help her, she's leaving tonight" He explained.

"What sort of distress call? Where is Sara?" I questioned panicked.

"She's in China somewhere… I think. Laurel managed to get some sort of trace on her. We think is Ras Al Ghul going after her. I think Sara has bitten off a bit more then she can chew" He told me.

"So Laurel's going for good?" I asked.

"Yup" He replied.

"I don't know how to feel about that" I stated.

"I just thought you would want to know, that's all. You don't have to feel anything if you don't want to" He said.

"I just don't think I'm going to miss her as much as you are"

"I'm not asking you to miss her" He replied.

"I don't know what you want me to say. I'm sorry Sara is in trouble and I really hope we can help her but I don't think I'm going to be sorry to see Laurel go, maybe it's a good thing. It will give you and me a real chance to start again without her around and Laurel will get to see her sister and be the superhero she's always wanted to be. Sounds to me like it's the best solution all round" I explained.

"Laurel said she wants to see you before she goes. One last chance to talk" He said.

"She can come over" I replied.

"I know you probably don't want to speak to her but it means a lot to her that you say goodbye"


Laurel is due to be here any minute and I don't know how I feel about it. I know this is going to be the last time I see her for a long time, I'm sure our paths will cross again but I don't think it will be anytime soon. Apparently Laurel is happy that I've given her this one last chance to talk to me and a final chance to clear the air before she leaves. I wish her all the luck in the world, I know what she did was terrible to do, especially to a friend but I don't want any harm to come to her or Sara. I'm sure the two of them together will be fine and they'll be able to hopefully get the peace they want and live the lives they want to live.

Oliver was still here and this is going to be the first time I've seen them together since and I'm nervous about it. This is the last time the three of us are going to get the chance to set the record straight. I'm sure she doesn't want to leave here without knowing she did everything she could.

The door knocked and Oliver opened it, Laurel stood on the other side with a warm smile on her face "Come in" Oliver said.

The three of us went out to the balcony and looked over Starling.

"Thank you for agreeing to see me again. I just want to apologise again before I leave just in case something happens and I never get to say it again" She said to me.

"I'm sure you and Sara will be just fine. You're both very capable and I do really hope she's ok when you find her" I told her.

"Thank you"

"I'll give you two a minute" Oliver said and made his way back inside, I looked in the window and saw him making coffees in the kitchen.

"I want to say goodbye to you and apologise for everything. I know nothing can ever make up for what I did and I know I've probably destroyed the relationship between you and Oliver. I didn't want to do that. You are a good friend and you didn't deserve that" She told me "I know you don't owe Oliver and I anything but please give him one more chance to prove himself to you. I know he loves you very much. He never looked at me the way he looks at you, he never really planned a future with me like he has with you. Felicity, you are the one he loves" She explained to me.

"I am going to give him once more chance but he knows if he steps another toe out of line then he's done" I told her.

"That's understandable" She replied.

"I really wish you and Sara all the luck in the world" I told her.


One more chapter to go until this story is completed.
I will post the last chapter on Wednesday.
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