Over the past six months, I had attended Jacob and Charlie's funeral, been told I was to stay away from La Push and distanced myself from Edward. I never wanted to distance myself but I found myself drifting futher and futher away. I couldn't get him out of my head, the look in his eye's when he as bleeding Jacob dry. He enjoyed it, no matter how much he denied it, I saw the look on his face. I had been living at the Cullens, Charlie's house sat the way we left it with my blood spattered white dress hanging in my wardrobe and the house, my room and my dress were gong to stay that way...untouched. Edward and Jasper had a huge fight after one night Edward backed Alice after Jasper disrespected her. Jasper stormed out of the house and Esme begged him to come back, he and Alice have separate rooms and don't say two things to each other.
Six months later...
When I woke up this morning, everything was normal; or at least, that's what I believed it to be.
I rolled over, groaning, still half-asleep, to find Edward lying next to me smirking, amused at how zombie-like I was in the morning.
"Good morning." He chuckled.
I reached over and ruffled his hair but still it was perfect.
When I came downstairs, now fully awake, after showering and getting dressed. I tripped over my feet as I walked into the kitchen, but of course Edward caught me, "I swear Edward, sometimes I think one of the main reasons I'm keeping you around forever is so you can save me every time my klutziness almost 'accidentally' kills me.". I laughed. Except this time, I noticed when I said the part about keeping him around forever, Edward looked really uncomfortable. And this wasn't his normal 'I'm not going to steal your soul so stop talking about forever' kind of look, either. It was like he was nervous, had something to hide. Oh God no. There was an uneasiness in the pit of my stomach, a hollow feeling I had the last time he left.
Those words echoed around in my head, the last time. Shut up I told myself, he loves me…
"Are you...o...ok?" I stuttered on ok, I wasn't sure what the answer would be.
"Hm? What? Oh, I'm fine. Come on. Eat. We're going to be late to school if you don't hurry." There was a huge red light blinking in my head, but I choose to ignore it, just like I ignored the last time he left
I kept quiet...just like the last time
The rest of the day passed in a blur. If you asked me what I did, I would say I didn't know, I paid attention to Edward today. He was being distant, and still had that strange look to him, as if he was afraid that I would find out about some terrible secret he had, something no one would know. But I knew that couldn't be it; I already knew his deepest secret. Vampire, duh. What other horrible secrets could Edward keep from me?
After school, I met Edward in the parking lot.
"Bella, I think you should stay at home tonight. You have lots of homework and I think you should spend some time with Charlie."
"Charlie is working tonight Edward, you know that. So I'll be all alone" That was not like him. He never left me alone.
"Well, I'll send Alice over later, after she see's Jamie" (Jamie was Alice's new boyfriend)
"But"
"BELLA!" He cut me off, he was so cold.
He had that same distant undertone in his voice again. The one that threw me off every time he said something. He was nervous.
"Yeah, Edward, that's fine."
Once I got home, I decided to check my email.
I had one emails.
From Renée
It started like this:
Why haven't I heard from you, though? It's not because of that boy, Edward? I'm telling you Bella, he's not good for you. Men are prone to create heartache, no matter how perfect they seem. If they hurt you once, they will do it again.
I love you, don't get mad, all I'm saying is if he hurts you again, I' here for you.
Love Mom.
I sighed…
I started writing back to her:
Hi Mom
Sorry I haven't been in touch, but it had nothing to do with Edward.
I know you're worried, but don't worry, Edward loves me and would never hurt me!
I love you too.
I have to go. Talk to you soon, I promise
Love Bella.
I sent that, and then glanced at the bottom corner of the screen, to the clock. 6:00 I'm sure Edward wouldn't mind if I went over to see Alice, we could hang out there and then come back to mine.
While I was driving over to the house, I thought about my mother's email. She was right, on some accounts.
Edward would never stop his campaign against me being changed, but other than that, I knew he wasn't like the others. He was different; he was the one for me!
And yet a tiny part of me couldn't help but wonder, what if he did hurt me again? Somewhere, deep inside myself, I knew that I wouldn't be sad, if in some alternate universe, Edward hurt me again. I knew I would be angry instead. Angry, not depressed, not weepy moan-y, I would be angry, very, very fuming and irate.
When I pulled up in front of the mansion, I saw only two cars out front; Edward's silver Volvo and Rosalie's car The others must be out hunting or something. Oh well. At least I could wait for Alice and in the mean time I had Rosalie.
The music blaring from Edward's room was deafening to me, I could only imagine how bad it would be for a vampire.
I went up to Rosalie's room and opened the door; I figured she wouldn't hear me knocking. It was empty.
I made my way around the house to all her other normal hangouts: her closet, her bathroom, her shoe closet (when I got to this one I realized how bad her shopping addiction really was, almost as bad as Alice ), every place I went was bare of human—er, vampire—life.
As far as I could figure, the only way I would find Rosalie was to ask Edward her location. Hopefully he wouldn't be too mad about my arrival being as he told me to stay home.
Once I was on the third floor, the volume of the music was making me ears hurt. I could not comprehend why he would have it that loud. Maybe he had a new way of being masochistic, damaging his supernatural ear buds by blasting off.
I opened the door, and in less time than it took to blink, all my questions were answered.
Why Edward had seemed distant.
Why Rosalie was nowhere to be found.
Why the music was so loud.
And why Renée's email had made me feel so uneasy.
What I saw was a scene I will never forget. Rosalie pressed up against a wall; Edward, pinning her there without a shirt on, he was so toned, muscled... Rosalie had no top on either, but Edwards big arms blocked her . I somehow doubted Edward was a virgin, was that a lie to? They were kissing in a way Edward and I never had, it was so passionate, deep, the way they moved their lips, in sync with each other. His hands moving over her breasts kissing them and caressing them.
But what disturbed me, made me ticked more than anything else…they continued to do so with me standing there watching. Apparently, any noise I made was drowned out by the music. That damned music…
And then, something amazing happened. The hole in my chest that had ripped itself painfully back open. All I wanted to do, was shut the music off, shut it off and yell… Yell a lot… My alternate universe theory I had come up with in the truck proved itself, full force. No, I wasn't mad. I was pissed and hurt... but mostly pissed. And there would be hell to pay.
