Had to write this whilst fresh in my mind and inspired... This chapter is a hard M pretty much from the get go but there is plot in there. Pinky swear ; )
Chips x
{~}
Brendan placed his hand on the nape of Caden's neck; ensuring that he couldn't get away. His groan was quickly followed by a desperate crushing of their lips as he pulled the lad into a passionate kiss.
{~}
Any hesitation Ste may have felt was gone in an instant. Sometimes it was pointless to think too hard on things.
Doug's words of advice #5-
'Remember to think first and do later. But sometimes it's got to be "do first, think later". You n'a mean, bra!'
Then he wiggled his eyebrows at Ste.
Right now, with Brendan's mouth on his, Ste knew exactly what Doug meant.
His lips were bruised by the ferocity of their kiss. Soon they would be pink and swollen because Brendan demanded so much of them. Ste rose to the challenge and gave as good as he got.
If he was honest with himself, he would admit that this connection is what he had been missing and craving for the last three weeks. It had put a cloud over things.
It's naff, innit. He thought to himself. I barely know him. Why do I feel like this?
Brendan pushed him back against the edge of the motion-sensitive toilet in the cubicle and it flushed automatically. He pulled their bodies together then didn't break their kiss when he forced the bigger man backwards so that he collided with the cubicle's door. Brendan's hands moved over him, tracking under his clothes and up over his skin, skimming his chest. They felt up the plains of his back and pulled him in.
"I want you." Brendan whispered heatedly.
"Yeah." Ste replied, feeling the heat between; the thermal and the sensual. "Me too."
They kissed some more as Brendan's palms cupped his buttocks and tugged him in and up so that he was on his toes and they were groin to groin. Their sounds echoed loudly in the restroom. Heavy petting.
When the door to the restrooms opened they stilled in each other's arms. Ste held his breath and looked up at Brendan. His eyes widened as the footsteps walked right up to the cubicle they were in, only to enter an adjacent one a moment later.
Brendan looked down at him in amusement. He was enjoying this. Maybe he liked living on the edge, nearly getting caught. Or maybe he was finding Ste's reaction funny. The sweat that broke out on his forehead. The nervously bitten lower lip. The anxious hands that tightly fisted Brendan's expensive suit.
The stranger next door took his sweet time peeing while whistling tunelessly, then flushed and walked out of the cubicle. Ste and Brendan heard him wash his hands then walk out of the restroom.
Ste released his held breath. "Oh my God! We nearly got caught!"
Ste didn't suffer from satyriasis. It wasn't like him to fornicate in public toilets like some cheap slut. He hoped Brendan didn't think that of him.
The older man's arms encircled his waist, engulfing him so he buried his face into the Brendan's chest and inhaled deeply. He smelled really nice.
Brendan lifted his chin up and studied Ste's face intensely. "What are you doing later? You want to...?"
He let Ste reach the obvious conclusion to the sentence.
"Um." Ste knew what he should say; what Amy and Doug would want him to say.
I'm busy. In fact, I didn't think I'd ever see you again so, yeah, bye.
But things were different now that he wasn't escorting anymore, weren't they? If he went with Brendan it wouldn't be a call out so technically he wouldn't be breaking his promise to them.
If it's not a call out then what is it? What is going on here? How do I define this? Us? A date, maybe. The first in a year.
Brendan kissed him lightly interrupting his thoughts.
Ste shook his uncertain brain and spoke a bit of sense, "I'm here with friends. I can't leave. You too."
"Them? They're not friends. That's business, Caden." Brendan whispered against his lips. "I'll tell them something urgent has come up."
He brought their pelvises together to clarify his meaning then smiled mischievously.
"You're having a laugh, right." Ste grinned back. "You can't say that."
Brendan simply raised an eyebrow in response then he took his hands off Ste, stuffed them into his pockets and leaned back against the cubicle. "So, what do you say?"
Don't, Ste. This could get complicated. Meeting up with an ex-client but not being with him as a client. That's too messy. Just walk away.
He cleared his throat. "Uh..."
Doug's words of advice #6-
Never mix business with pleasure. It is bound to end in tears.
But this wasn't business anymore. It was pure undiluted pleasure.
Before he could change his mind he said,
"I need to send a quick text then."
{~}
Now that Brendan was no longer a client Ste could own up to the fact that he liked this imperfect mysterious stranger. Really liked him. And he wanted to see whether there could be something more between them. He had a feeling that Brendan felt the same way through things he had said, how he had been, how he had behaved. It couldn't just be wishful thinking.
What he knew for a fact was that he could not admit to these feelings to Doug and Amy. Not yet at least. Not until he was what happened with Brendan. They would tell him he was delusional.
The trip in the taxi to Brendan's place was full of sexual tension. Barely a word was exchanged; just the occasional telling look and surreptitious touch, a teaser of what was to come. The taxi driver made three a crowd. He must have sensed it because he sped through the dark streets of Chester at breakneck speed so that they were outside Brendan's in no time.
Fast forward to Brendan and Ste entering the apartment. Brendan barely had time to close the door before Ste was on him kissing him passionately.
"At ease, soldier." Brendan said breathlessly. He led the way up the stairs to the first floor with Ste just behind him, gripping his own hands into fists to stop himself from pawing the older man like some sex pest.
"Let me get what we need." Brendan said, then disappeared through a door at the far end of the room and returned with lube and a roll of condoms. Magnum. For the well-endowed.
He ran them seductively over Ste's body before dropping them to the floor when they began to kiss again. The heat went up a notch. Ste quickly and impatiently helped him out of his jacket and shirt.
Slow down. Take your time.
He took pause to assimilate Brendan's body, what was on show right now. The hard pecs. The developed muscles of his taut concave stomach. The hint of rib cage on inhalation. The scattering of hairs that looked courser than they felt.
All of it was his to enjoy.
He took his glasses off and put them on a nearby ledge.
"In case someone tries to break them again." He said with a smile.
Brendan grinned back. "They are the superman of glasses. Couldn't break them if I tried."
Ste murmured, "I'm not a gambling man so..."
He kissed Brendan's nipple while gazing into his eyes. The Irishman jerked in response so he kissed it again and then the other, savouring him.
Brendan hissed, shuddered, then muttered, "You proud of yourself? You've found my Achilles heel."
Ste murmured. "I missed that last time."
He let his lips do the talking then, tracing down Brendan's chest. This was body worship; fondling, kissing, groping, licking; whatever he fancied until he was on his knees and he reached a barrier. A buckled up belt. The waist line of a perfectly cut pair of trousers.
He pushed a hand between Brendan's legs to cup his balls through the material and rub against his dick. Then he started to take the Irishman's trousers off.
Brendan stopped him and got him back on his feet. The power of his kiss pushed Ste backwards unbalancing him so that he had to reach out and grab onto the bigger man. A huff and groan later and he was in Brendan's arms; lifted up, legs encircling his waist, clinging on for dear life.
He was ready to be fucked already. Hard. Slow. It didn't matter. He was game. Brendan made him want it; made him so easy. He wanted Brendan so much; too much maybe.
Was that possible?
Brendan carried him to the couch in the living area. Ste combed his fingers through his hair and tugged at his ear lobes with his teeth to occupy his mouth. To prevent himself from begging Brendan to hurry up and stick his dick in him already.
Brendan laid him on the warm soft white leather and looked down at him with fire in his eyes. Sensible Ste vaguely felt bad for the state the couch would be in when they were done with it. Brendan didn't appear to have any such concerns as he pulled Ste's trousers off unhurriedly, then his underwear, like unwrapping the last of a pile of gifts.
Ste self-consciously covered his groin with both hands. He was rock hard already. How embarrassing. All they had done so far was have a little kiss and a grope.
Brendan climbed on top of him and pushed his obstructive hands away. He lifted Ste's shirt off over his head. It was unwanted and unnecessary.
He did a slow continuous lick up his stomach and chest. It made every hair on Ste's body go up on end. He moaned so Brendan repeated the lick only this time it started at Ste's balls and up the base of his dick. It moved up over the shaft then the supersensitive frenulum, flickering over it lightly like a butterfly, making Ste pant. Without preamble, his cock slid down Brendan's throat right down to the root.
That was unexpected.
He bucked involuntarily as he felt throat muscles swallow around him.
Fuck. Brendan was so good at this. He grabbed Brendan's hair reflexively and the Irishman grinned at him. "Sweet cock."
Ste didn't know what to say other than, "Thanks."
He gasped in surprise when Brendan firmly took hold of his hands and lifted them up to trap them down to the couch above his head. He kissed Ste. Deeply, ardently, heatedly.
Brendan's look was hungry as he pulled back to inspect Ste's naked blushing body.
"You're a skinny fella, ain't ye?"
Passion brought out Brendan's accent. Ste liked how it got even thicker than it already was. How sexy.
"Maybe." He lifted his head up to get more kisses but he couldn't reach Brendan. "But I'm strong, me."
"Prove it." Brendan whispered.
Ste tried to reach up again but he was trapped. His legs were straddled by Brendan's. His arms were fixed over his head. He tried to free himself but couldn't. No chance. Brendan was stronger than him.
Ste smiled uneasily and tried again, this time with more effort but still he couldn't get out of the taller man's hold. His heart started beating faster but not with passion or excitement. This didn't feel right. Brendan was restraining him. While normally he didn't mind, and in the right hands he even enjoyed it, he didn't like it tonight.
Not after the letter.
You are nothing but rot. A filthy whore... I see you for what you are... You had better watch your back because one day, when you least expect it, I'll be there and you will breathe your last breath and the world will be better for it.
He entertained the impossible.
Surely Brendan wasn't the crazed psycho who sent him the hateful threatening mail?
If he was then Ste was devastated. He had totally misjudged the man and he was in danger. He hadn't even told Amy or Doug where he was for fear of their backlash.
No one knew where he was right now and this could be the scenario that his friends had warned him to be careful to avoid.
What Brendan himself had cautioned him about.
You want to be careful, Caden.
Had that advice actually been a warning?
Ste was about to lose it. He was about to scream and beat Brendan off him like a savage beast.
He reached his head up to bite at Brendan's chest or neck and used his legs and back muscles to try and throw Brendan off him. His face contorted ferociously from the effort.
"That all you got?" Brendan whispered into his ear but the muscles of his torso and arms were tense with the effort of keeping Ste down.
Suddenly he let go of Ste's hands, releasing him.
He soothingly caressed over the lad's body and smiled down at him. "We'll need to work on that. That was pitiful. You barely made me break a sweat."
He gave Ste a cheeky wink then kissed the corner of his mouth, the angle of his jaw, his shoulder and the centre of his chest.
"So fucking skinny." He whispered again as he leisurely wrapped his arms around Ste's body. "So fucking hot."
{~}
Brendan could kiss the lad for days. Caden had lips that begged for it. They called for attention. Even when he knew that there was so much more to explore of the lad's body he had to come back to his mouth once in a while.
It was simply irresistible.
He eventually moved south. He tongued the freckles that dusted Caden's shoulders, grazed his hand over the wordy tattoo that marked the lad's left flank and touched a finger along the scar on the lad's right lower stomach.
These physical imperfections were already familiar to Brendan.
He took Caden's cock into his mouth again. It felt good. It tasted good.
"You want me to put on a condom on it? Just, I mean for you, if you want..." Caden asked. He stared at Brendan with dilated pupils. "I'm negative, like, for everything. I get tested regularly."
Brendan grinned. The kid bordered on OCD. It was good to know he was careful and Brendan never fucked anyone without protection, whether they claimed to be 'clean' or not, but oral... it was virtually impossible to catch something irreversible through oral.
"Thanks for the newsflash. So am I." He said. "Now can I..."
He pointed at Caden's cock before caressing its tip with his tongue once again.
"Yeah." Caden sighed as his head fell back onto the couch and his eyes fell shut. "Sure. Yeah."
Brendan took his time, sucking on the head before going up and down the shaft.
The lad loved it. Every bit of Caden's body showed it; from the keening sounds coming from the back of his throat to the gentle undulation of his hips as he thrust leisurely up into Brendan's mouth. He was a picture as he panted through slightly swollen lips and occasionally darted a tongue out to moisten drying lips. His intense blue eyes were half closed, partly obscured by long lashes as they looked in awe at Brendan's ministrations. His cheeks were rosy, his slim torso was heaving. One hand teased his own nipples while the other rested on Brendan's shoulder like an anchor to reality.
Brendan thought he looked fucking hot. Delicious.
Then the lad became toneless. He sighed and gasped, "That's-, oh my-, Brendan...!"
Caden was close.
Brendan tongued his balls; heavy and ready to release their seed. He massaged them with his mouth, sucking at them and licking while he fisted Caden's cock rapidly.
Completely indecipherable groans came out of the lad then he went stock still.
Caden came hard shouting out Brendan's name as he convulsed and shot all over himself. Brendan kissed him to simply quieten him down. The walls of his apartment were thick but even they couldn't contain the lad. His neighbours would definitely not appreciate the auditory X-rated disruption.
If cumming were ever to become an Olympic sport, Caden would get gold every time. He rippled with his orgasm. It ran through every single cell in his body as he gasped and jerked. His body was taut and bowed, eyes shut, face scrunched up, mouth open and accommodating Brendan's, tasting himself as they kissed. Despite the kiss, a rhythmic groan came from him and transferred through to Brendan with every shudder.
Brendan sat back and watched as the lad settled into a post orgasmic puddle of bliss. There were a couple of white on white cum stains on the couch.
Mary will be pissed, Brendan thought.
He swiped through some of the white viscous bodily fluid that was pooled on Caden's chest with two fingers and took it to the lad's mouth.
"You've come buckets." He said. It was as if the man hadn't rubbed one out in a while which was a ludicrous proposition.
Caden greedily licked Brendan's fingers. "Yeah."
He was still horned up. Still up for more.
Good, because Brendan wasn't done with him yet. He hadn't had his fill.
Caden moaned. "That were... wow, Brendan."
Brendan stood up and got out of the rest of his clothes. He pulled Caden to the edge of the couch on his back.
He bent Caden's knees back, "Hold them there".
He manoeuvred the lad's butt so that it was on the low armrest of the divan; his arse angled up to a perfect position. A perfect view. Then Brendan picked the lube and condoms and placed them next to where he knelt, on the floor to the side on the couch. He caressed Caden's thighs, over the fine hairs of his legs, his inner thighs, splaying them out wider. As his hands got closer to his groin Brendan felt the lad pull himself closer to his touch so that his arse cheeks hung over the edge of the arm rest.
Brendan was not falling for his silent plea. He wasn't going to rush himself. His fingers lightly scratched over pert buttocks; arsehole winking at him in between the two delectable mounds of flesh. It was trying to tempt him into foregoing any further foreplay.
The tight puckered hole twitched so he spat on it, lubing it up. Caden clamped his legs together instinctively as the warm saliva hit him then splayed them apart and flexed his knees even more. An open invitation.
"Do it." He whispered. "Please." He reached his hands down to hold Brendan's hand in his. "Please."
Brendan smiled. The lad wanted to get fucked already. Okay. That could be arranged.
His voice was barely under control. "Get yourself ready for me."
Caden flushed even more as he used his own cum to rub over his hole, mixing it in with Brendan's spit. He touched himself until his moans grew louder and louder.
Brendan couldn't fail to notice how Caden's other hand continued to hold his, intertwining their fingers together and squeezing. A gesture that was better suited to a walk in the park than hot sex. Brendan didn't mind it.
He gave the lad's fingers a squeeze in return.
Caden threw his head back and pushed two fingers into himself slowly, allowing himself to adjust. He fucked himself with them, knowing just how much pressure to put on his prostate to feel like a thousand bolts of pleasure were shooting through him.
His face slackened with ecstasy.
Brendan saw the lad's fingers repeatedly disappear into his tight heat. He was transported away making Brendan envious. His penis was jealous of Caden digits.
Brendan slipped a lubed finger in deep next to Caden's own, stretching him out more. Caden sluggishly opened his eyes.
They hit a stride, plunging and withdrawing in unison until Brendan tried stuffing another in.
Caden winced and pulled away dislodging them all.
"No, Brendan." He sounded impatient. He inhaled, exhaled then got his arse back into position on the armrest. "Just fuck me now."
Brendan bit back a laugh of surprise. "Okay, bossy boots."
He sunk his teeth into a butt cheek then picked up a condom. He rolled it on, poured lube on it and then lined up to Caden's hole. The lad had his hands firmly gripping Brendan's hips. It was as if he wanted to make sure Brendan followed through on his promise.
The maths didn't make sense when Brendan's dick was placed next to Caden's hole. Despite prepping it had already snapped shut. So Brendan rubbed his cock over it, then tapped against it, then applied the slightest bit of pressure onto it with the tip of his dick; getting the two reacquainted to facilitate a smooth passage.
Caden didn't seem to understand his logic. His hold on Brendan's hips became a death grip that silently told him to stop messing around and get on with it.
So to prevent injury to his hips Brendan pushed in more firmly. After some resistance, the head of his thick cock was engulfed in Caden's wet heat. His sigh was matched by Caden's.
He began with shallow thrusts, in then all the way out; testing the waters and watching Caden dilate with every invasion.
He pulled his dick out again and poured more lube onto Caden.
Caden moaned with desire. He wanted it bad; all of it. He reached for Brendan's cock and guided it back into him.
Brendan shoved the first few inches in one thrust that had Caden shouting out then reaching up to him and pulling him down for a kiss. Brendan extricated himself from his hold. He wanted to see the rest of his dick sliding in, bit by bit.
He watched as the lad's already hard cock stiffened more. It took time to ease into him completely but Brendan was patient. With time and practice the lad would learn to take him quicker in the future. Balls deep.
Caden groaned as Brendan held his cock while fucking him.
It wasn't long before he was jack-hammering into him, fucking Caden back onto the couch and off the armrest.
"Fuck me!" Caden barked at him between moans.
Brendan grunted as he pushed him back onto his dick, back to having his arse hanging over the armrest. There were advantages to Caden being slim. He was manoeuvrable.
Brendan gripped both his legs as levers then drove in hard. His dick thrust in at a merciless pace that Caden was going all kinds of crazy for.
Caden looked right at him with glazed disbelieving eyes. Brendan wasn't sure what was going through his head exactly.
I can't believe I am taking this? I can't believe is feels so good?
Every so often Caden stroked his cock; when he wasn't too overcome by Brendan driving into him. When he slid down the couch yet again due to the force of Brendan's thrusts, Brendan went to sit on the couch and breathlessly told Caden to,
"Ride it."
Caden faced him, straddling his thighs. He did an impromptu lap dance as he pushed down on Brendan's cock; a slow but steady gyration of his hips to accommodate the big man back into him. They kissed as he finally sat flush on Brendan.
Caden whispered against his mouth. "You're so deep in me."
Then they kissed once more.
His embrace was tight and sealed them together. As they kissed Caden began to rise and fall on Brendan. There was a skill to this, a skill he had nailed; too fast and it would all be over soon. Too slow and Brendan would want to take control of the pace again.
They were in tune; their breathing and panting was in unison. They kissed again and again, completely in the moment, so that it was hard to say where one kiss ended and the next began.
Brendan had hardly any room for manoeuvre but he took advantage of the little he had to drive up into the lad while Caden ground himself down on him, enjoying every inch of his cock. They rocked against each other.
"Oh!" Caden's arms squeezed tighter around Brendan's shoulders; burrowing his face into his neck, trapping his dick between their bodies where the friction of their bodies stimulated it.
The whisper into Brendan's ear was almost defeated; a sigh of resignation. "I'm going to cum again."
Brendan slid down the couch, in a slouchy position, so that he could plant his feet firmly on the floor. He took hold of Caden's hips and plowed up into him hard and fast. The lad bucked from the force nearly falling off Brendan's lap.
Brendan's orgasm hit him with full force, like an unanticipated wave crashing against his back in open sea. It would have blown his socks off had he been wearing any. He let out a short sharp yell as he came, overwhelmed by the intensity, and then grunted through the rest of his shudders.
Caden's climax was just as powerful. He seemed to wrap himself in Brendan's arms like a knot that could not be untangled. Not that Brendan wanted to untangle himself. He kept a firm hold of the lad sharing the moment; feeling a sense of carnal completeness that only came after a perfectly imperfect shag.
Caden was giggling breathlessly. He panted heavily as Brendan kissed him. It proved to be a kiss of sorts; a lazy exchange of air, a flicker of tongues, a swipe of grinning lips.
They fell back onto the couch together, spent and completed devoid of energy.
{~}
As Ste had anticipated the couch suffered and he knew that he was the main reason for the mess on it. Not his fault. He had suggested that he wear a condom. That would have contained the mess. He tried to think of the right type of cleaning product to remove the cum.
Maybe a wet wipe then soapy water would do the trick. Or would that ruin the leather?
Doug would know. Doug knew everything.
"It'll come off." Brendan whispered lazily as if reading his mind.
They were lying along the length of the sizeable couch, legs intertwined, facing each other. Brendan's arm was flung over Ste's waist. His fingers drew languid circles on him. The other was tucked under his head as a makeshift pillow.
Ste couldn't help but say. "Like it has before, you mean."
Careful. Jealousy isn't sexy.
"What?" Brendan frowned until he got the lad's meaning. "No. I mean Mary is coming tomorrow. She'll sort it."
His voice was dismissive.
"Mary?"
"My cleaner-slash-headache."
"You have a cleaner."
"Yes." Brendan grinned.
"Oh my God."
"What?"
"Nothing."
Lazy git.
"Who has time to clean?" Brendan defended.
"You're going to let that poor woman clean this mess."
Brendan shrugged. "I was going to wipe the obvious bits and then let her do the rest. Yes."
"And none of that sounds wrong to you?"
"Nope." He kissed Ste's forehead and run his hand over his back and over his buttocks. "You're sexy when you get on your soap box."
Ste stood up.
"Where are you going?" Brendan asked.
"Where are your cleaning supplies?" Ste spoke to him like a child.
Brendan shook his head as he unhurriedly sat in the centre of the couch and put his arms over the back of it; guarding it.
"I'm not letting you touch this unless you are a professional."
Ste went towards the kitchen, dressed in his birthday suit and started opening cupboards. He was hoping he would come across a detergent that said 'Cum-stain remover for white leather couches'.
He didn't but he did find an all purpose cleaner, a sponge and some Marigolds.
He put the bright yellow gloves on then poured some of the liquid onto the sponge before approaching the couch.
Brendan was smiling at him in amusement. "If Mary looked like you she would never get any work done..."
Ste paused at receiving the compliment. He was being sidetracked from his mission.
"But Mary is three times your age, has a limp and a mole on her face with a hair growing out of it."
"And she is a she." Ste gave him a rueful smile.
"And she is a she." Brendan agreed.
"Please stand up. I need to clean."
"No." Brendan's grin broadened. "Kiss me."
"Not yet." Ste's smile was lopsided. He was going to win this battle. "Get up, Brendan."
"No."
He dived forwards, hoping his speed would let him get to the couch before Brendan stopped him.
That didn't happen.
He landed on the floor with a thud, tackled down by Brendan, who had also somehow managed to get the sponge out of his hand too.
The older man was straddled over him trapping him to the floor only this time it was fine. Better than fine.
Ste felt a churning feeling in his belly as Brendan looked down at him.
"The 'Marigold plus nothing' look is a good one on you." Brendan said then he ran the sponge over Ste's chest.
"Oi, get off!" Ste said.
Brendan was removing cum off him.
"You need this more than my furniture does."
"So do you!" Ste tried to grab the sponge back but the gloves limited him. "This stuff is going to mess my skin up. What if it had acid in it or something?"
He leaned his head up to try and sniff the potent smell of the detergent as if he would recognise what acid smelt like.
"Maybe we should get showered then."
Brendan rubbed the sponge over Ste's groin and he felt himself respond. He couldn't believe that he was still up for more after what Brendan and he had just shared.
"Okay." He said.
Brendan got off him and then helped him up to stand.
It was only as they made their way up the stairs that Ste realised Brendan had played him like a fiddle.
He hadn't touched the couch.
{~}
They showered together in the bathroom and then dried each other off in Brendan's bedroom.
Then the internal questioning began.
What now? Brendan thought.
Ask him to stay the night, a part of him said.
Brendan wanted nothing more. He could not reach a saturation point with Caden. The more exposure he got to him the more he wanted. The lad got under his skin. Between the metaphorical sheets he made Brendan's bones sing and skin tingle. But there was more. He injected light into Brendan's gray soulless life. He brought humour and excitement that Brendan hadn't felt for a long time, if ever, if he really thought about it.
It's because he is a new toy. Something shiny to play with and while away the dark times with. Ditch him. He's no use to you and you are no good for him.
Remember what happened.
Brendan knew that this second voice of reason was right. Caden and he had gelled in Liverpool. There had been an immediate connection. The insane jealousy he experienced when he had seen Caden with Doug at the art gallery when he had assumed they were a couple echoed how he had felt when he woke up to find Caden gone in the hotel in Liverpool. His brain could not entertain the thought of the lad with other men.
Those emotions were confusing and unneeded especially since they were towards a man whose living was sleeping with men for money.
Caden was, by definition, an actor; a man who had to adapt to make his client feel special, to create the illusion of a connection.
Brendan had to nip his feelings in the bud. They weren't real. They were reactionary. Cheryl had said something like this might happen. Transference she had called it.
The best way to end it was to stop seeing Caden. Go cold turkey. But he knew he would slip up because he had tonight after keeping away from him for three weeks.
So he compromised. He would limit their encounters to quick call outs. Nothing more. Shags with little or no conversation. He could do that. His past sexual experiences had involved exactly that, with the exception of one man.
Brendan could be composed and detached when it came to Caden.
Caden was looking at him now as he stood in the middle of his room with one of Brendan's bath towels wrapped low around his hips. He looked uncertainly at Brendan. He probably didn't know whether to change back into his clothes which were scattered on the floor downstairs or whether to shed the towel and climb into bed.
"Did you go on holiday?" Brendan asked suddenly.
"What?"
"Your account was inactive the last time I checked." He clarified.
"Oh, yeah. No. I should have called you and told you. I didn't know if I should because we had only met twice."
Which meant he had informed clients that he had met on more occasions than that, Brendan concluded. That twist of jealousy reappeared.
"I wasn't on holiday." Caden smiled as he walked up to Brendan. He placed his hands on the taller man. "I meant to tell you. I don't..."
Brendan cut him off with a kiss. He hadn't meant to but the way he smiled and looked at him and the way he touched him made it impossible to resist.
You're in deep. His voice of reason taunted. He's acting. Don't forget.
"No."
"What?" Caden said.
Brendan cleared his throat. "I think you need to get going." He said.
Caden's face dropped. "Really?"
"Your friends will be worried about you."
Caden smiled. "Oh that. No. It's okay. I'll explain later. They'll understand."
"What is that supposed to mean? Do they know about me?"
"Uh."
"I thought you said you were discreet." He knew he was being an arsehole but he was angry at himself for having a complete lack of self control when it came to the man before him.
"Discreet?" Caden frowned at him.
"Your words. On your site."
Caden smiled again. "Yeah. That is what I was trying to say to you..."
"I don't need you to stay tonight, Caden." Brendan said firmly, trying to convince himself as much as letting the escort know.
"I thought we were getting along." Caden's voice was small.
"We fuck. I cum. You cum. Is that what you mean?" He said clinically.
"No, that's not what I mean." Caden gripped Brendan's arms.
He looked upset.
"You can drop the act now. You were great, okay. Your service is second to none. You live up to your own hype." Brendan said.
He marched up to his briefcase and took out some money.
"Oh my God." He heard the escort say. Only it sounded like choking.
"Here." He stuffed the pile of cash into Caden's hand. "I'll call you for our next time."
Caden looked blankly at the money in his hand. He made a fist around it then looked back up at Brendan.
For the Irishman it was like staring in a mirror.
The escort's eyes looked dead; much like Brendan knew his looked when he stared at his own reflection of a morning.
He couldn't understand the escort's reaction or lack thereof. It was as if the very essence of what made Caden who he was disappeared with a snap of the fingers.
The escort was barely audible when he eventually said, "Thanks."
He whipped off the bath towel. "You've been very clear. Sorry. I'll go down and get changed then. I'll be gone in five."
As Caden left the room, Brendan felt a pull to take his words back, to stop the escort. To tell him that he regretted his words.
Brendan wanted to kiss him and apologise because he had a feeling he had hurt the lad but then that would mean that Caden actually cared and that was a preposterous supposition because they barely knew each other and what they shared was just a business transaction.
That's it.
A fucked up business transaction.
