October 27th - Prompt #9: And the lights went out in Port Charles.

-9-

Someone was poking him.

Feeling half dead, Jason fought to open his eyes and find out what the hell was going on. His body felt like it had been run over a couple of times, his mouth felt like he ate something rank, and… if whoever was poking him didn't stop he was going to rip his finger off.

When his mind broke through the fog of sleep Jason instantly knew he wasn't in a familiar place. The bed was comfortable, he could feel a warm body beside him, but this was defiantly not his bed.

Confused, Jason thought back to the last thing he remembered as he tried in vain to open his eyes. He remembered going to Carly's Halloween party with Elizabeth. They spent most of the night at the bar... no, there was a time when Elizabeth danced with that oversexed doctor.

Jason snorted, like he was any better.

He danced with Elizabeth, he remembered that. He also remembered having to control his body from responding to the way her body swayed against his. It was hard, he hardly succeeded, but Elizabeth hadn't noticed.

They had gone back to the bar after that, had a couple more drinks and then went home.

Wait… they didn't go home.

He was too tired or drunk, or both, to drive so they got a room. But didn't Elizabeth leave?

Try as he might, Jason could not figure out the rest of the night. There were foggy glimpses of following Elizabeth outside and holding her as she cried. They were in an elevator…

Son of a…

Jolting up in bed, Jason turned his head quickly to see who was next to him. Sure enough, Elizabeth sat next to him, her back resting against the head board, an angry – yet very attractive – pout curling her lips.

He didn't. He couldn't have. He did.

This was Elizabeth! The one woman in his entire life that he made a vow to never sleep with. She was the one woman he couldn't have because she was the one woman he wanted the most.

But yet he had slept with her. Whatever friendship they had was most likely ruined now.

As he stared at her with wide eyes, her pout stayed in tact. She was angry with him and he couldn't blame her. They had such a good thing going. A safe and trustworthy friendship and he ruined that by taking her to bed.

And he couldn't even remember it.

Maybe that was a good thing. If he couldn't remember what it was like to be with her then he wouldn't crave it twice as much as he normally did.

Yeah right, who was he kidding?

Sighing, Jason scrubbed his hands over his face. He looked away from her, not knowing what to say. "I'm…" he cleared his throat, tried again. "I'm sorry."

When he braved a look at her, her pout turned into a glare. "Don't worry about it."

She scooted off of the bed, making Jason realize for the first time since he saw her that morning that her hair was wet and she was wearing his shirt. Damn, she looked good in it. One side of the shirt fell off of her shoulder. The thing was huge on her and Jason had never seen her look more beautiful.

Her movements were jerky as she walked to the table at the other side of the room to pick up what looked like her clothes folded in a neat pile. "Elizabeth, wait," he called out to her when she made her way to the bathroom.

She stopped with her back to him. Her shoulders were so tight Jason wanted nothing more than to place his hands upon them and soothe her anger. He stayed on the bed instead, clearing his throat for what seemed like the millionth time that morning. "Please, look at me."

It would be easier to say this to her back, hell, it would be easier to say it over the phone where he was in a different country, but he wasn't a coward. He needed to make her understand and the only way to do that was to be a man and apologize and beg for her forgiveness to her face.

Slowly, she turned around, her face set in a hard, unreadable expression and Jason was beginning to feel the loss of her friendship already. Of all the things he could loose in life, loosing her would hurt the most.

"What I did, it was wrong."

Her face softened a little, her eyebrows crinkling slightly. He continued, "I shouldn't have slept with you."

When her face fell, Jason knew that was the wrong thing to say. He was never good with words which was normally fine with him, but this… this was torture. How did he tell her that sleeping with her was the biggest mistake he made not because he didn't want to sleep with her – because he did, more than anything – but that he couldn't sleep with her because she was too good for him?

He was a bastard, a man who was never meant to be in any type of loving relationship. Woman like Elizabeth deserved to be loved with everything a man had. They deserved a happy life with a husband and kids and a freaking white picket fence.

All Jason could offer was his love – because he knew he could love her, probably already did – maybe some kids, but the white picket fence with the flower garden was out of the question. If they were ever to get a house, it would consist of guards stationed at every possible place of entry and a barbed wire fence.

He closed his eyes. This was for the best. He would probably lose her but she would end up happy in the end. "What happened here…"

"Like I said, don't worry about it." Her voice had never been that cold before.

"I shouldn't have…"

"Slept with me, I know. You don't have to worry about that, Jason."

"But…"

Again, she interrupted him. "What do you remember?"

For the first time in his life Jason felt himself blush. He swallowed thickly, his gaze focused in her direction but not quite on her. "We were in the elevator. I started… kissing you and then we ended up here."

There was a whole lot he left out. Like the way her lips felt against his and how turned on he was just thinking about the sound of her beautiful moans as he picked her up and settled her center right on his…

Think about something else, damn it!

"I don't really remember much else."

Relief mixed with hurt washed over her face. "It wasn't much of a night to remember."

Whoa… did she just insult his ability?

As if she could read his thoughts, Elizabeth sighed raising her arm as if to gesture then dropping it down to her side as if defeated. "I didn't mean it like… that. It wasn't much of a night to remember because we didn't sleep together."

Wait. "What?"

She smiled a smile that didn't reach her eyes. He hated it when she did that, when she felt the need to act like she was ok when they both knew she was faking it. He thought they had come to a point in their friendship where she didn't need to hold her feelings from him.

Just another thing he screwed up last night.

"We didn't sleep together."

So many different emotions ran through him in that moment that Jason couldn't pinpoint exactly how he felt about that. "We didn't have sex?"

"No."

When he continued to stare at her, his eyes blinking several times to try and grasp what really happened last night, Elizabeth let out a breath, looking away from him. "Yes we kissed, but when we got here you… you fell asleep."

"I just fell asleep?"

"Would you stop asking questions?" she huffed, her voice thick with emotion. What the hell did he do to her? "We were both drunk last night and before either one of us could do anything that we would regret later, you fell asleep."

He looked down at himself. "I'm naked."

"Yeah well, it didn't go any further."

He wanted to ask her how far it went. He wanted to find out so many things – mostly, how she felt about everything – but he didn't ask. As curious as he was to what it was they did do, he could tell she was uncomfortable and wanted to end the conversation.

"I'm sorry."

"I swear to god, if you apologize one more time I might just hit you." Any other time Jason would have laughed, would have teased her about how adorable she was when she got feisty but it didn't feel right in that moment. Something drastic had changed between them and Jason didn't have the slightest idea as to how to fix it.

Since it was unlikely that he would ever be able to turn back time, he figured this would never be fixed.

"I have to change," Elizabeth spoke after a long, uncomfortable silence. Without looking at him, she turned back around and walked quickly to the bathroom. He braced himself to hear the slam of the door but she closed it quietly and that scared him.

Whenever Elizabeth was mad about something, she would slam things around. When she was hurt, she would act detached, moving around quietly. He remembered her being hurt from the night before and how much he hated himself.

But somehow, this was worse.

Just as quietly as she entered the bathroom, she exited. She tossed his shirt to him, sitting down to place her boots on. As he watched her, Jason could remember taking those boots off. The vision was a bit foggy but it was like he was in that moment again, kissing her skin, savoring its sweetness.

He groaned.

Her head snapped up to look at him. When their eyes connected she began to blush. He told himself to look away but he couldn't.

She was the first to look away.

His hand fisted in his shirt, feeling the slight dampness that her wet hair left behind. She stood, looking around the room then back at him. "I'm gonna go."

"Wait," he protested as he made to stand. "I'll take you home, just let me change." He was fixing the sheet around him so that when he stood, nothing peeked out, but stopped when Elizabeth shook her head.

"I'd rather be alone right now."

He wanted to tell her no, that he wouldn't leave her alone but held back. They both had a lot to think about and Jason didn't want to say anything else that would upset her more. She was obliviously sad about something and he needed time to figure out what that was.

He needed to remember their conversation from right before they started kissing to do that.

"Ok," he nodded once, slowly.

Elizabeth mimicked his nod then turned around and walked towards the door. Her hand was around the handle, posed to open the door when she turned around. The look on her face was earnest, making him sit up straighter.

"Jason?"

"Yes?"

Her mouth opened to speak, but she closed it tight, nibbling on the lower lip like she always did. Her expression went through so many emotions in that moment that all Jason could do was watch her and marvel in how beautiful she really was.

"Never mind," she mumbled as she turned around and opened the door.

Something within him told him to let her go, to forget that she had even turned around. It consumed him, this feeling. But he ignored it, needing to hear what she had to say just as much as he felt the need to let her go.

"Tell me."

She stopped again, slowly turning around. "If…" she cleared her throat. "If you hadn't fallen asleep and you could remember… what happened, would you really regret sleeping with me?"

"Yes." He didn't think before answering.

Tears gathered in her eyes, one spilling down her cheek and Jason knew that she didn't understand his answer. But before he could explain, she was gone.

He jumped out of the bed to go after her, but realized that by the time he got his clothes on, she would be gone. Since he wasn't about to embarrass the both of them by chasing her in a sheet, he stayed where he was, his chest throbbing with pain at her tears and hurt.

Rubbing the shirt she wore between his fingers, Jason stared at the door. He needed to tell her that she deserved better than him, that he wouldn't regret sleeping with her because he didn't want her – which he felt that's what she thought – but that because it wouldn't be right.

It was hard for him to believe that someone like Elizabeth could want him, but Jason was suddenly realizing that Elizabeth was attracted to him, that her feelings ran deeper than just a friendship. There was always a part of him that wondered, that thought she might have feelings for him like he had for her, but he never wanted to find out.

It would be that much harder to fight off his own attraction if he knew hers matched his.

Sighing, Jason dropped the sheet, pulling the shirt over his head. He took a deep breath – inhaling her scent she left lingering in his shirt – as he walked towards the table where the rest of his clothes were folded neatly on top. As he changed, Jason only had one thought running through his mind.

He needed to get his best friend back.