Sadly, I don't own The Big Bang Theory
Sheldon paced around the office much to Raj's dismay. "Just let it go. There is nothing that you can do."
"Of course there is but neither of you are willing to drive me back to the apartment." He winded as Raj rolled his eyes.
"Sheldon the last time I did that I ended up losing my spot to this gorgeous woman and I had to park in the handicap space because I couldn't talk to her. I ended up with a fine and Barry still mocks me."
"But your parking spot says 'Reserved for Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali. Was she illiterate?"
"I know but since she couldn't speak English I ended up getting screwed and not in the good sense."
Penny walked down the hall as she searched for the Physics section of the university. She asked a few students and possibly a professor but they stared at her as if she didn't belong here and one guy tried to ask her out.
She walked and looked at the names on the doors that she passed when she recognized the name on her right: 'Dr. Sheldon Cooper'. Penny stood in front of the door and knocked three times.
"-another Labradoodle." He muttered as he opened the door, surprised to see her. She held up the paper in front of her.
"I think you forgot this at home. I hope I'm not too late."
He stared at her shocked as he took the stapled pages from her."I-I don't know what to say. How did you arrive so hastily? I just arrived myself and you have no access to a vehicle."
"I took a taxi." Penny replied quickly.
"At this time? The traffic is-"
"What's going- eep!" Raj asked, poking his head from behind the door and then waved at Penny.
"I know you told me to remind you but it slipped my mind. If you want to give me a strike-"
"On the contrary. I believe a thank you is appropriate in this situation."
"You're welcome sweetie." Penny answered, taking a step back."I'll get going now. See you at home later."
"Penny, a moment. I believe a simple 'thank you' will not suffice given the importance of this document."
Before she had ca chance to reply, Sheldon engulfed her in, albeit, a sweet but the most awkward hug she had ever received in her life. Well and afterlife.
Raj's eyes widened at the sight as he quickly pulled out his cell phone and took a picture, the sound of the shutter breaking their hug.
"Really Raj? You've just been issued a strike." Sheldon glared at him before he told her goodbye.
Penny chuckled as she turned around, her two slits exposed on her back as Sheldon and Raj stared at her as she disappeared around the corner.
He turned around and looked at Sheldon. "What the hell was that?"
"What?"
"You hugging Penny! You don't touch anybody, ever!"
Sheldon paused and stared at Raj. "You're correct. I'm afraid I didn't know what came over me. Usually I'm scrupulous about my hygiene but I don't feel the need to douse myself in Purell or Lysol."
"Perhaps. But did you notice that? The cuts on her back?" Raj said, motioning to his own.
"I did, how can one's shirt rip in a perfectly symmetrical v-shape? Was it deliberately cut? Maybe some cult or gang initiation?" Sheldon pondered, earning a look from him.
"I think you're the alien and not Penny."
Sheldon sat at his laptop; his fingers poised on the keyboard as he searched the web for Penny Price. It was a long shot but any information about this woman's background would lessen his discomfort. He searched through the names and accompanying images. Nothing came up.
"Drat. She must exist somewhere." Sheldon mused and continued searching until a thought hit him."That's it; maybe she goes by Penelope Price."
He searched and came across an obituary and article from years ago about an actress that was killed in an accident at a movie studio.
"Hmm this absurd of the face of it, one can't simply reanimate. How unfortunate that there isn't an image to accompany the article." He mused as the door opened, causing him to close his laptop abruptly.
"Can I talk to you for a second Sheldon?" Leonard asked, walking toward Sheldon.
"That depends. What is this pertaining to?" He asked, standing up from his chair and walking over to the couch.
"Leslie and Penny." Leonard answered.
"Alright but only because you mentioned Penny." He replied, motioning to the couch as he sat down.
"You know that I've been dating Leslie for three months now."
"Obviously, how could one miss that?" Sheldon said, earning a look from Leonard.
"But I've been thinking about my relationship with her and I think we should call it quits."
"Excellent. However this does not mean you will be able to move back in. Penny and I have a good thing going and you're not going to ruin it." Sheldon defended, pointing at him.
"Understood. I have instead decided to pursue Penny."
Sheldon's face fell. "What? That is unacceptable and I forbid you from starting a relationship with her."
"Why? Penny's my friend and from there love can sprout. She's kind to me, listens to my problems and is there for me when I need her. I think she might have feelings for me."
Sheldon scoffed. "By that logic Penny would be in love with not only you but Raj, Howard, Amy, Bernadette and me."
"Please, why would she pick any of them or you over me? Besides I've thought this through and all the signs point to me." Leonard retorted, crossing his arms.
"Excuse me and for the record she is far too intellectual for you. I doubt you could hold a decent conversation with a woman let alone Penny without leading to carnal activities."
"Need I remind you that she is smarter than you too?" He said, causing Sheldon to frown.
"I'll stipulate to that but out of the three of us I'm the smarter one and therefore much more suited for Penny."
"Are you saying you have a shot with Penny? The asexual Homo Novus? Don't make me laugh at your desperation to one up me." Leonard said over his glasses.
"Jealous are we? Clearly I am the Alpha male of our group."
"Oh yeah? Prove it." Leonard glared at his friend.
"Has the asparagus jar incident evacuated your mind?"
"You handed me a sealed jar!" He yelled.
"For the record I pre-loosened it and you have the upper body strength of a hobbit!" Sheldon spat back.
"Better than Raj, he's the Keebler Elf!"
"Indeed but even Howard is stronger than you." Sheldon grinned at Leonard.
"He beat me at wrestling once and only because I was caught off guard."
"He told you he was going to strong arm you and came at you from the front. You were out for an hour." He recalled as Leonard groaned.
"How was I supposed to know that he would do the Sleeper move?"
"He informed you."
"I thought it meant that he would put himself to sleep!" Leonard shouted.
"Why would he?" Sheldon asked with derision.
"I don't know! Stop asking me questions!"
The door then opened, revealing Penny in her Cheesecake Factory uniform that had chocolate splattered all across her chest.
"Penny out of the two of us who would be better suited for you?" Leonard blurted out, earning a look from her.
"What?"
"Indeed. Please inform him of the most obvious and rational choice."
"I just had a horrible day at work thanks for asking." She replied, walking past them toward her bedroom.
"Penny averted the topic so to save you from further embarrassment. I believe she would likely choose me."
"She didn't. Penny just walked away and hid in her room."
"Obviously to avoid your inevitable rejection. Who's desperate now?"
Thanks for reading and please review!
