Running Up That Hill
By: The Hatter Theory
Chapter 9: Something Rotten
Disclaimer: I don't own rights to anything having to do with Inu Yasha, Kate Bush, or Placebo. Boo.
Kagome stumbled out of the akunoya the next morning rubbing her eyes and determined to get some air. The memory of Sango's reaction the night before still stung in the light of day, and she was determined to get a semi good start to her morning. When she almost stumbled over Kouga's prone form, she let out a little giggle, taking in the sight of the snoring, awkwardly positioned ookami. For several moments she wondered just how she had gotten to her bedroll, then she stopped short, distracted.
The smell of food cooking wafted through the air, and she realized how hungry she was when her stomach rumbled ominously. Following the smell, she ignored the curious stares of the bandits, so focused on the idea of food that when a hand settled heavily on her shoulder she spun around, dagger in hand before she could stop it.
Sesshoumaru however, could stop the dagger from doing any serious damage,and did, his hand tight around her wrist.
"It is good to see you have not forgotten your lessons," He deadpanned, and she knew her face was burning as he stared patiently, dropping her hand. "You should not be out of the akunoya without an escort," He reprimanded.
"Sango is watching over Miroku, and Kouga is still asleep," She replied, turning her gaze to the ground.
"These men are not honor bound to me as the youkai are. They would be dead the moment they tried to harm you, but the attempt would have been made," He said. She knew he was saying that she could be hurt before anyone knew it, even if punishment was swift and severe. That he wanted her to avoid that warmed her a little after Sango had seemed so antagonized by her presence the night before.
"I smelled food," She admitted. Her stomach rumbled once more, as if to punctuate her statement, and she laughed at herself, her cheeks growing even hotter in her embarrassment.
"I will have food brought-" He began.
"Please, don't make me go back in there. I'll hang around you, I'll be quiet," She promised desperately, the idea of going back to an awakening Sango driving her to such extremes. "Please?" She added, unable to meet the daiyoukai's gaze.
He let out a small sigh, something he rarely did, and she would have missed it if she weren't waiting for him to answer.
"You may," He finally told her. Kagome felt like a child again, allowed a rare treat. She smiled up at him brightly, tempted to hug him. Refraining, she settled on what she hoped was a thanks that conveyed her sincerity.
"Food first," He rumbled when her stomach growled again. Kagome nodded obediently and allowed herself to be led to the cooking area where meat and rice were being distributed. If anyone thought a woman being guarded by a youkai was strange, they said nothing. Kagome was too wrapped up in eating her first meal in over a day to care about anyone staring, and wolfed the food down, offering a polite thank you to a stunned camp cook.
Once her repast was complete, Sesshoumaru wordlessly led her to another akunoya, one that was bigger than the tent she had slept in the night before. When he held the flap back for her, she nodded gratefully and stepped in.
And immediately felt like an animal on display. Or prey. Prey definitely worked as a description. She was so nervous she didn't even realize Sesshoumaru was behind her, waiting for her to move forward until someone cleared their throat. Mumbling an apology, she moved to the side, waiting for him to take a seat.
There was only one camping stool left around the square table that stood low to the ground, and Sesshoumaru moved to take it. Kagome followed, folding her legs beneath her to sit next to him, ignoring the curious glances.
"We have been trying to figure out where the hanyou has gone, and everywhere but the west seems a good option. I don't even know where to start," A bird youkai sighed, looking down at the map. Three other youkai besides the tengu and Sesshoumaru stared down at the map as well, as if it would magically provide answers.
"The jewel is that way," Kagome said in a small voice, pointing at a wall of the tent, at once afraid of attracting their notice and frightened of saying nothing. She rose on her knees and began tracing her finger along the map. "We're here, right?" She asked Sesshoumaru, who nodded. "I feel it pulling me this way," She told him, tracing a line. "It's faint, but I can't block it out, and I don't think he can block it from me," She added.
"Can you estimate a distance?" Another youkai, one of indeterminable heritage, asked her. Kagome shrugged helplessly, angry that she could only guesstimate.
"Maybe a few days? I haven't tried to really tell distance before, just direction," She admitted quietly. "But I know Naraku won't let it out of his sight. Not now."
"What about the boy's shard?" Sesshoumaru asked, staring at her finger on the map.
"I think it's his shard, it's the only pure one left, but it's more faint than the jewel. It's coming from the same direction," She added.
Sesshoumaru considered the map for a long time, and she could practically hear the thoughts buzzing in his head. His eyes seemed so focused she was surprised he didn't burn a hole into the map.
"Is it on the move?" He finally asked.
"It doesn't feel more faint than before, but it''s hard to tell. The tug is there, but it's always there, the feel of it, it's just too faint" She replied, casting her eyes back to the map, ashamed that she couldn't give a straight answer. "I'm sorry," She finished meekly.
"It is more than we had before," The bird youkai piped up. Almost embarrassed at how grateful she was for the stranger's praise, she ducked her head politely with a demure thank you that in no way conveyed the depth of her gratitude.
"If it is on the move, than so should we be," Sesshoumaru intoned. Kagome nodded in agreement for a moment before she realized what the daiyoukai was implying.
"We can't," She whispered, forgetting that the others in the tent were youkai, and would easily hear everything she said. "We can't, they have as much right to come as we do."
"The right, but not the ability. The monk will slow us down, and there is no time to wait. The slayer will choose to stay with him," He predicted.
"But her brother is still with Naraku!" Kagome rebutted, temper flaring.
"And he will die if we do not hurry. The taijiya will have to make the decision. If she chooses to continue on with us, the monk will be transported back to the shiro in the west."
"She'll never agree to that," Kagome began.
"It is her choice," Sesshoumaru replied, his voice beginning to take on an edge. Recognizing it for what it was, she moved back, staring at the daiyoukai reproachfully.
"If you force her to make this decision, she'll never forgive you," She informed him, voice calm and quiet despite the rage flashing in her blue eyes.
"This Sesshoumaru does not need the approval of a demon exterminator," He replied flatly, and Kagome practically saw the wall of ice slam up to keep everyone out.
"I can't do it to her," She whispered. Despite all the little things Sango had been doing, the taijiya was her friend. She had been acting out of fear and anger, and Kagome knew that. She couldn't ask her friend to choose between Miroku and Kohaku.
"This Sesshoumaru will inform her," He replied, standing. "We should be off as quickly as possible. Wake up the wolf, he will need to eat before we leave." With that he left the akunoya without any sort of farewell to the others, and she stood and gave the youkai a hasty bow before running from the tent, trying to intercept the daiyoukai.
He proved to be faster than her, and was already opening the flap to the tent she had slept in the night before. Ignoring anything being said, she looked for Kouga. Not finding him, she set out to explore the camp and hopefully find the erstwhile wolf.
Several minutes later she found him, sitting by the food stall devouring a bowl of rice. Laughing, she replied to his garbled hello with a smile and wave. There was a sudden resounding crash and the bowl almost flew from his hands as he jumped up, the gauntlet appearing from thin air. Kagome looked around fearfully, casting out her senses to see if Naraku had sent on of his evil children after them.
Instead, her eyes landed on Sesshoumaru and Sango. Sesshoumaru was walking away from the screaming taijiya, completely ignoring her existence. Kagome envied him, just a little, that he was able to walk as if he didn't have a care in the world, or an angry demon exterminator following behind him screaming expletives. Sango however, didn't seem to care about his apathy. Instead she continued to follow him, calling him every profane she could think of, making even the bandits blush. Kouga whistled under his breath, watching the two as Kagome held her hands over her mouth, determined to hide the horrified expression she knew she was wearing.
Finally Sesshoumaru turned and leveled a glare at the slayer, a single word coming out as an authoritative command.
"Silence."
Sango complied, stunned by the pure, quiet fury in that single word.
"You have a choice. It is war. If you choose to come, the monk will be taken care of. If not, this Sesshoumaru will do everything possible to save the boy, not" He added. "Not for you. Rin likes the boy, and he has traveled with this Sesshoumaru before."
"You'll kill him!" Sango accused.
"Stupid human woman. She's going to let Naraku's illusions break her. Sesshoumaru's giving her an honorable out. She's just making it harder on herself."
"Does Kagome know about this? She would never allow-" Sango demanded shrilly.
"She knows. She also knows there is no choice."
Sango's eyes searched the camp, and when her gaze finally landed on Kagome, she began stalking forward purposefully, her rage peaking at new heights. When the taijiya reached her, she was prepared for almost anything. Screaming, tears, begging, almost anything.
She was not prepared for the slayer's hand to strike out, slapping her so hard that her head snapped to the side. Heat suffused her face, and she wasn't sure if it was from the slap or the sudden mortifying realization that her best friend had not only slapped her, but had done so in front of dozens of people, all of whom watched the scene unfolding before them with a sort of glee.
"You're going to take his side, act like them?" Sango demanded, jerking her chin to Sesshoumaru, then to Kouga. "It must be so easy to just ignore your emotions and be a monster," The woman accused, tone biting and eyes filled with bitterness. "You could change this, and you're just letting it happen, just like Inu Yasha."
Self loathing abruptly shifted to a blaze of rage fueled by anguish. Kagome tried to hold on to her temper, and in the face of her friend's accusation, lost.
"You want to know what I let happen? I let Naraku rape me because he said he wouldn't kill Inu Yasha if I did. I gave up my virginity while Inu Yasha was forced to watch, and then I watched him get torn apart, literally. And I live with that every day.
"Miroku looks like he's been starved, and the only blessing is that somehow his hands aren't broken anymore. But he doesn't even believe he's free yet. I'm not disconnecting myself from my emotions. I want to save Kohaku before Naraku decides that he's tired of waiting for his wish. It's war Sango. War is hard. War hurts. War forces us into situations where we have to make the difficult choices. So if me wanting to get to Kohaku before it's too late causes some sort of issue with you, well, frankly, grow up."
She walked away from the taijiya, eyes glistening and already regretting everything she had said. The stunned shock and hurt on the taijiya's face tore at her, demanding she go back and apologize. But Sesshoumaru was right, there was no choice, and Sango had to make a decision.
Before she realized it, she was in the akunoya, staring down at the gaunt face of her other friend, wondering if he hated her too.
"I heard the commotion. Sango is not handling the news well," Miroku said in a weak voice, trying to muster a smile and only managing to grimace instead. "It's not an easy choice. I told her to go," He added.
"You know that won't work on her. But, kami, she hates me so much, and I don't understand why. I've been trying to be a good friend, and every time I turn around something happens to make her angry at me," Kagome whimpered, the tears that had gathered beginning to spill out over her cheeks.
"You want to save Kohaku. For Sango, she's always pictured all of us together saving him, but most especially her. For her, it feels like no one else has the same drive she does to save him," Miroku tried to explain.
"And I've been understanding about that. But you can't travel right now, especially not at the speeds we'll be going, not" She added after seeing him flinch at her words, "That it's your fault, because it's not. But it's just the way things are. There aren't a lot of choices. And to blame me because of it, I mean-" She choked out, appalled and guilty that she was unloading on the man they had just pulled from Naraku's dungeon the day before.
Several silent minutes passed, Miroku's hand coming to cover Kagome's. She could feel the bones through the flesh, the knuckles that seemed too large as he squeezed her hand gently. His hand was light, as if the bones themselves were hollow, like a bird's.
"So now you're going to try and turn houshi-sama against me?" Sango demanded shrilly.
"Sango, calm down," Miroku wheezed, trying to sit up. Kagome forced him back down, turning to glare at Sango.
"My best friend is accusing me of being a heartless demon, so I had to talk to my other friend, because, oh yeah, the heartless demons out there wouldn't understand," She snapped, glaring hotly at the taijiya. "I'm not trying to make him play sides. I just asked him if he had any idea what I've done to make you hate me so much! Since he doesn't, I guess I'll leave you two alone so you can tell him how evil I am," Kagome snapped, standing and stalking past Sango, tears starting anew.
Sango caught her shoulder and pushed her back into the center of the tent, pushing a finger into the miko's chest.
"This wouldn't be a problem if you let Miroku travel with us and we took it slow, like we did for you," Sango accused.
"I had a cold. He's been imprisoned for months. Do you want to kill him and Kohaku at the same time, because that's exactly what you're suggesting!" Kagome finally snapped, trying to hold onto her sense of logic, determined to show the taijiya that she was being unreasonable.
Instead, she felt her cheek stinging almost the moment she heard the cracking noise of being slapped once more.
When she looked up however, Sango was staring at Kouga, who was glaring down at her as he held her wrist in a tight grip. Kagome could hear the bones moving against one another and flinched, moving forward to stop the ookami.
"No," Sesshoumaru rumbled, moving forward. Kagome had barely noticed him, and seeing him move so purposefully, so gracefully, she was reminded of a cat hunting. Red was bleeding into his eyes and for a moment she allowed herself to be grateful he was on her side.
"I told you not to act thoughtlessly toward the miko, as you have been doing constantly on this journey. She must be of sound mind to battle Naraku, and you do as much, if not more, to undermine that peace than the hanyou. I have stood by, allowing her the space to resolve this on her own, despite my right to interfere as her alpha." Sango looked ready to protest, but his eyes hardened even more, if that was possible, and Kouga's grip on her wrist tightened, forcing her to close her mouth.
"She is pack, and has acknowledged that. Until she or I decide otherwise, she will continue to be under my protection. I had been content to let this issue resolve itself, but you have moved to physically harm her twice, and that is not something I will allow," He finished, voice a smooth, cold command.
"The monk will be taken to my shiro to be cared for by a healer. I will send him with one of my own, and you will travel with him. I will not allow you to cause further conflict."
"You can't just make decisions for everyone," Sango snapped.
"Incorrect. As lord of the west, it is either my lands you go to, which puts you under my rule, or you stay outside of the west, in the lands Naraku has taken over, in which case the monk will most likely die."
Kagome flinched at the callousness with which those words were said. Suddenly unable to meet Sango's gaze with her own, she moved her eyes to Miroku, who had somehow propped himself up throughout the course of the conversation.
"Sango," He murmurred, voice weak. "This is the best way. Accept it."
"But-" Sango began.
"They're trying to save Kohaku. I know you want to be there, but you blamed Kagome because you had to make a choice you didn't like. If Kagome's mental well being is linked to her powers, and you keep blaming her, it will keep her from fighting," He said in a soft voice.
"And she's more valuable than me?" Sango half demanded, half sobbed.
"She is the one responsible for breaking the illusions in Naraku's fortress. She sent the demon's power back at him after combining it with her own. Yes, she is infinitely more powerful and valuable as a fighter than you," Sesshoumaru informed the taijiya, who suddenly seemed at a loss. Swinging her gaze between Kagome and Miroku, she wiped her face of the tears that refused to be held in check and let out a small hiccup that wasn't quite a gasp and wasn't quite a sob.
"Fine. We'll go back to the shiro."
Kagome withdrew from the bitterness in her friend's tone, from the anger that flashed in her eyes. Instead, she moved from the whole group, determined to put as much space between her and the tent as possible.
When she exited the tent, she ignored the sudden cursing coming from behind the flaps as she strode away, more determined than ever to get air. As she drew in the cold, her dizziness faded and for a moment she felt blessedly clear. Then she realized that she would be traveling alone with the two youkai.
She spent several minutes in a quiet panic, wondering how she had arrived at such an impasse. When she felt him standing behind her, his aura unmistakable, the sorrow radiating from palpable, Kagome turned, eyes shimmering with tears to ask him why everything was going so wrong. Instead, the words stuck in her throat, unable to move past the lump forming there.
"I'm sorry," Kouga said, looking distinctly uncomfortable. "I didn't know Sango was so-" He couldn't think of a word that wouldn't offend the miko and stopped, looking to the ground. Instead, he shuffled his feet, suddenly as shy as he was uncomfortable. "Look, I know you don't like being touched by men, but, well, I mean, I'm here for a hug anytime. As a friend," He added.
His shock mingled with a sense of anger as the miko flew into his arms, sobbing quietly, her shoulders jerking as she tried to keep from wailing into his chest. His arms went around her and he held her gently, as if she would break under the least bit of pressure.
"Why is it happening this way?" She hiccuped several minutes later, pulling away and wiping the tears from her eyes. He could see her visibly steeling herself, pulling herself up straighter. Her chin came up and he marveled at the difference between the soft onna he had known and the woman standing before him.
"I don't know. I never thought Inu Yasha would die. I didn't know about Naraku, either," He added softly, feeling seven sorts of foolish for not thinking the evil hanyou would have done something like that. "I'm sorry that happened to you," He finished.
"It happened, and I'll be able to think about it soon. I can't now. Yesterday, whoever that demon was, he tried to make me and Sesshoumaru watch that scene. Sesshoumaru reminded me that it wasn't real, and I lived through the real thing. I survived. I have to keep surviving," She added, eyes on the tent. "If I don't, Shippou and Rin and Kohaku, everyone will die." The last came out as a strangled whisper, and she blinked several times, trying to keep the tears at bay.
"Your things have been packed into Ah Un's saddle. It is time to leave," Sesshoumaru's voice broke in, shattering the illusion of solitude Kagome had wrapped herself in. She nodded gratefully, thankful someone had thought to gather her things for her. Going back into the akunoya was something she wanted to avoid at any cost at the moment.
"The monk is being transported today, by one of my own. I've left orders that he is to be taken to Tenka."
"Thank you, for Miroku, for-" She didn't finish, noticing that he was looking distinctly uncomfortable, for him at least. His back was stiff and his shoulders thrown back, his eyes looking above her instead of at her.
"This Sesshoumaru was remiss for not stopping it sooner," He replied blandly, walking away.
"Did he just apologize?" Kouga asked, flabbergasted.
"Sesshoumaru never apologizes," She chuckled, amused at the wolf's reaction. But Kouga was correct, Sesshoumaru was apologizing. After months in the daiyoukai's presence, she was beginning to understand what he was saying when he spoke, and the myriad of meanings in his terse words were beginning to become clear to her.
'Or I could be imagining everything,' She mentally sighed as she and the ookami began to follow. Ah Un was saddled, and Kouga hopped on. Kagome sat on the little cloud Sesshoumaru was standing on, waiting patiently as she crossed her legs and braced her arms. She allowed herself one last glance at the akunoya and started when she saw Sango staring at them, angry tears escaping eyes that held nothing but bitter accusation.
The sky was gray, and the wind bitterly cold, and she was thankful. The biting gusts dried her tears before they could fall.
Snow had started falling by the time they made camp that night. Kagome shivered violently despite her warm clothing and buried her faced behind her muffler, trying to warm the air before breathing it in. Instead, it felt like she was breathing broken glass, the air was so frigid.
Kouga called out, suggesting a cave instead of sleeping in the open as they had been doing. When Sesshoumaru said nothing, the wolf had pulled away from their little group and was gone for half an hour before returning, a victorious smile flushing his features.
"I found one big enough for everyone, even Ah Un. About fifteen minutes that way!" He called, pointing his finger in a general direction. Sesshoumaru said nothing, didn't move a muscle to acknowledge the wolf, but the cloud suddenly shifted directions, beginning to follow the wolf, only a 'pace' or two behind the dragon.
Twenty minutes later Kagome was gratefully changing into dry clothes and draping the slightly damp ones over rocks. Kouga was out getting wood for a fire, and Sesshoumaru was hunting. The cave itself was chilly, but as soon as she'd pulled on the kimono and hakama, she felt a thousand times better. Her jacket and muffler were damp from snow that had melted onto it, and she wished she could use them.
One glance at Ah Un, and she sidled up to him, eyes wide in an approximation of Rin's expression. After a few minutes of politely requesting, the dragon laid down, curled almost like a cat, and she was cuddling up next to his stomach. Cold blooded the dragons might be, but once she had her blankets situated around her, she began to feel warm and surprisingly cradled and safe.
The events of the day had left her emotionally and physically drained, so it wasn't surprising that she fell asleep so quickly. Kouga, once arriving back at the cave, had given a surprised snort, then chuckled at the sight of the miko curled up as if she were the dragon's own hatchling. He set about making a small fire, determined to keep everyone warm in the night.
When Sesshoumaru stepped in, he spared a moment to stare down at the strange ningen who had, like his ward, adopted such an unusual resting place. After dropping the rabbits by the fire, he shifted the pelt off of his shoulder and circled it around the miko's shoulders loosely as he had often done with his ward. The parasitic youkai moved on it's own, snuggling around her more closely and tucking itself into the areas where the cold could seep in. Kagome mumbled something unintelligible in her sleep and shifted, cuddling the fur to her and rubbing her cheek against it.
"I thought her being pack was a formality?" Kouga asked as he watched Sesshoumaru set about skinning the rabbits and cutting them into strips. When Sesshoumaru didn't deign to answer the question, Kouga huffed noisily.
"I'm not going to ask her to mate me. I can't anymore. The northern tribe, it needs an alliance with someone to protect itself, and mating Ayame is the best option. So you don't have to worry about me claiming her anymore. Besides," He added with a boyish grin, "She hugged me today. I'd say she's making progress."
"It will be a long time before she is ready to mate anyone, if ever," Sesshoumaru finally replied, staring into the fire. His tone was flat, but Kouga saw the rage there. But when the emotion was gone in an instant, he shook his head, wondering if the flickering reflection of the fire had caused him to imagine it.
"If she's pack, what will you do after this is over?" Kouga asked, genuinely interested. "I mean, if there's no place for her with you, she's welcome among the wolf tribe," He added.
"She is responsible for the kitsune pup, and also the orphans at the shiro. If she chooses, she may stay and be a mother to them. It seems she attracts strays."
"That's a really weird way of saying she's pack and she can keep her own little pack of beasts around. Seems to me you both have a tendency to attract the strangest little creatures," Kouga observed. He chuckled when the daiyoukai only sent a glare in his direction before spearing the rabbit strips and hanging them over the fire.
"She's a natural healer," Sesshoumaru intoned several minutes later, just as Kouga was beginning to think he had pissed off the daiyoukai with his observation. The comment was so quiet the wolf was almost certain Sesshoumaru hadn't meant to say it aloud.
"Yeah, she is. Too bad she can't seem to turn those abilities toward herself though," Kouga lamented. With that observation, silence began it's true reign over the cave, both youkai staring into the fire, lost in their own thoughts.
"Which way?" Sesshoumaru asked the next morning as they left the cave and soared into the sky. He watched Kagome focusing, her eyes closed. Her hand came up and her finger pointed northeast.
"Has it moved at all?"
"It's still traveling, but that's all I get. I can try to keep track, see if it changes directions," She offered. Sesshoumaru nodded his agreement, turning back to stare into the sky ahead of them.
"Can we talk about something?" She asked several minutes later, fidgeting as she did so. When Sesshoumaru remained silent, not even sparing a glance in her direction, she continued. "I don't want to think right now. You know what it looks like inside my head. Just talk about reports or something, anything. I just don't want to be in there right now," She admitted quietly, hugging her knees to her chest.
"Perhaps you should take the time to make the core a more hospitable place," He offered stonily.
"Then I wouldn't be aware enough to fight if something happened," She rebutted quickly. He heaved a sigh, wanting to shake her as he did so.
"What is your world like?" He asked, keeping the question broad.
"It's different from here, a lot different," She began, and he noticed that she relaxed a little, her knees falling as she crossed her legs once more. With half a mind he listened to the fantastical stories of cars and electricity. Toasters seemed a particular vexation to her, although why he couldn't quite fathom. Each story seemed more unbelievable than the last, and he wondered if he would live to see such inventions.
"My time has a different concept of honor though. Parents push their kids really hard to get into good schools, and there's tests all the time. It's considered dishonorable to fail at anything. It's a miracle my mother didn't disown me when I flunked out and got expelled."
"It is dishonorable to 'flunk out'?" He asked, unfamiliar with the term.
"Yeah, it means failing. I was gone so often, and my high school didn't accept the excuses of me being sick, not like my middle school did. It probably doesn't matter anyway. I don't think I'd be of any use in that world, except maybe as a fry cook," She laughed, but it was a mocking, bitter sort of laughter.
"This journey has taken much from you, it seems."
"It's my fault to begin with, I shattered the jewel in the first place. So, I mean, I guess it's karma. The shards have brought misery to everyone it's come into contact with. One stupid mistake, a butterfly flapping it's wings and all that," She sighed.
"A butterfly flapping it's wings?" He asked, once again confused.
"It's an old saying. Somewhere a butterfly flutters it's wings and causes a tsunami. It's a sort of chaos theory, ripple effect quote. Like dropping a stone into a pond, the ripples reach out."
"The two do not seem the same," Sesshoumaru offered.
"They're not. The butterfly effect is more apt, at least to me. One stupid mistake, and I was trying to save a child too. Another old saying is, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I'm beginning to believe it," She sighed.
"This Sesshoumaru does not believe so. It is unfortunate that your journeys have led you down such a path, but it speaks of your character that you have not chosen the path the taijiya has."
The reminder of Sango and her bitterness still tasted sour to Kagome, and she pushed a hand through her hair, managing to pull some of it free from the leather thong holding it back. For several minutes she didn't speak, and Sesshoumaru wondered if he hadn't pushed her back into the dark place inside of herself.
"Sango has lost a lot more than me. Her whole village was destroyed by Naraku. The man she loves has been tormented by him since birth by the wind tunnel in his hand. He's used her little brother against her at every turn," Kagome tried to explain. "She was a demon slayer before this even started. She hasn't had many reasons to trust them in the past few years, and she's scared of being abandoned. What I did probably seemed like I wasn't just siding with you, but trying to leave her at the same time."
"What she did was dishonorable."
"But it's my fault. If the jewel hadn't shattered, she'd still have a family!" Kagome cried, looking horrified.
"Her village was based around slaying youkai. Who is to say if she would or would not have lost them. Very few make it into old age, especially in such a profession. And make no mistake, they accept that before they enter into it. Family honor or no, there is a choice. Her family made their decision, just as she did, knowing that death was probable. Humans thinking they are unbeatable is a fallacy," He rebuked, growing tired of her willingness to excuse the slayer's behavior.
"She dishonors herself and her family by acting in such a manner. As you said, this is war. She has been trained to ignore her emotions while hunting. There is little difference now."
Kagome absorbed the daiyoukai's words, finding that as logical as they sounded, she still didn't, couldn't, agree with them.
"Maybe we should talk about something else," She muttered darkly. "Like if we're going to take Naraku's head back with us and parade it for the world to see."
"This Sesshoumaru has no intention of leaving that much intact," He replied, voice flat. Kagome shuddered, knowing she had been joking in a macabre sort of way. She had not expected such a response from the daiyoukai.
"Sesshoumaru, I feel something strange," Kagome whispered, looking around frantically. Once the jewel had settled into one place, and presumably Naraku with it, Kagome had been able to lead them more easily, and the feel of the taint wrapped tendrils around her, making her feel sick almost constantly.
When both the jewel and Kohaku's shard felt close, she tried to cling to the purity in Kohaku's shard. Despite that, they had landed often so she could empty the contents of her stomach, the darkness a living thing that seemed intent on poisoning her.
But it felt as if the jewel and the shard were less than a day away, and suddenly a new presence just appeared, as if out of nowhere, to her senses, coming at them fast.
"To the ground, the wolf has a better advantage," Sesshoumaru commanded Ah Un, who dove to the ground, following the daiyoukai and miko. Kagome, having replenished her arrows at the last camp, pulled an arrow from her quiver and allowed her power to encompass it. Despite the tar like darkness that was determined to cling to her, an invisible second skin, she felt the light washing it away. Breathing easily for the first time in two days, she allowed her focus to narrow to the strange aura heading their way.
"That's exactly what Ayame described," Kouga breathed, his eyes wide as the youkai flew down at them.
Instead of crashing into the earth, he touched down gently, and Kagome felt his aura reaching out to her, oily fingers trying to find a way to sneak past the power she projected.
"Are you one of Naraku's incarnations?" Sesshoumaru demanded, staring the strange youkai down. Kagome could sense youki, and yet something was incredibly off. Releasing a gasp, she realized that he was the source of the strange feeling she'd had when the two larger parts of the jewel had joined together.
"He escaped the jewel!" She called, the pieces of the puzzle joining together.
It was the wrong thing to say. The youkai's eyes snapped to her, widening in anger.
"Your powers should have been sealed!" He snarled, his malformed armed flying at her. Kagome released her arrow, hoping it would hit the strange appendage and purify it. She was knocked out of the way, stunned eyes still watching as the arm touched the arrow and somehow nullified her power.
"Sesshoumaru, he's from the jewel, but he, how did he-"
"Now is not the time for questions," Sesshoumaru intoned, moving from her and speeding at the enemy. Kagome watched, rapt, as the youkai shifted the shape of his arms, trying to trap the white blur that was Sesshoumaru.
His fist entered the demons stomach, punching straight through. Kouga gave a cheer as he sped at the demon, intent on getting his own blows in as well, when spikes erupted from the youkai's back and wrapped around to pierce the arm still caught in his guts.
"You...are weak," The youkai taunted with a smile.
Kagome saw the miasma at work, saw the flesh of the arm beginning to putrefy, as if taken over by rot.
"Sesshoumaru!" She screamed, as the spikes withdrew and Sesshoumaru leapt back, glaring at the youkai before him. Kagome notched another arrow, forcing her own power into it and letting it fly. Once more, she watched in horror as it touched the flesh of the demon and lost it's light.
"We gotta kill this thing!" Kouga shouted, the goraishi on his hand glowing as he ran forward, jumping and slashing down at the youkai. "Go get Kagome to heal you!"
Kagome stared as Sesshoumaru held his arm up, looking at it speculatively, as if slightly fascinated. Then a surge of power erupted in the air, and it was healed, looking as if it had never been harmed at all.
"Seems I'm not quite done with you yet," It cackled, a parody of a smile twisting his lips. Sesshoumaru lunged, and Kagome saw the transformation, awed by the sudden surge of youki that crashed through the field, like a wave cresting and breaking over her. His face lengthened, and once again she was reminded of how the beast always lurked just beneath the surface. His true self, not remotely human. As if gaining momentum, he seemed to blink in and out of existence until a roar resounded through the field, echoing as a fully transformed inu youkai emerged from nothingness.
The giant canine flew at the pale haired youkai, taking his head in it's jaws and moving to the air, almost grinning, but the faint impression faded quickly as the body dropped and miasma exploded, followed by a sea of oni.
"It is but a borrowed body," The head cackled from it's place in Sesshoumaru's jaws.
"What are you?" Kouga demanded, slashing through one oni after another, only to see them come back together. Kagome charged her arrow and released it into the mass, panic rising like bile in her throat as the multitude of youkai pieced themselves back together, resisting her holy power.
A strangled growl resounded, pulling her attention to the youkai. Desperately she notched another arrow, hands shaking so violently she fumbled twice as she watched tentacles wrapping around the daiyoukai.
"Sesshoumaru!" Her scream peirced the air as she finally managed to get it notched. Praying heavily under her breath, she released it, hoping for a different result than before.
Once again the light was snuffed out, as if the youkai was darkness itself.
"I am the dark soul of the jewel, Magatsuhi, " It cackled. "It seems there was never any reason to worry," The head finished, wrapping it's tentacles around Sesshoumaru even more securely, enveloping him and hiding his form from sight.
"What are you talking about?" She demanded, notching another arrow to aim at the sea of oni swirling around them, as if waiting for the command to devour both her and Kouga.
"I worried that you would purify us, and sealed your powers when you were but a babe. I have been with you always, Ka-Go-Me," He mocked. "You may have broken the seal, but your rape seems to have diminished your powers, or you were never very powerful to begin with. One never can tell with these things."
"Let Sesshoumaru go!" She demanded shrilly, watching as another arrow was wasted on the constantly regenerating youkai. The taunts only raised more questions, and she tried to push the distractions away as she fought, coming back to back with Kouga as they faced the swarm circling around them.
"I don't think I will. Once he's fully absorbed, he'll be a part of Naraku, or maybe a detachment, or perhaps the little hanyou will honor him and take on one of his traits, those strange stripes for example?" The head taunted, it's laugh grating on Kagome more and more.
"That's what you think, Sesshoumaru will beat you!" She boasted with a courage she didn't feel. "He's the strongest youkai alive, and even if you could subdue him, he'd kill himself before letting someone so weak use him!"
"Enough!" The head snarled, as if struck by her comment.
She felt the surge of raw power, waves of it, before she saw the explosion of light. The tentacles wrapped around Sesshoumaru fell away to reveal a humanoid looking daiyoukai once more, a blaze of energy blocking the sight of most of his left side.
Not wasting any time on pleasantries, he almost glided forward, eyes still tinged in red and a chilling smile lifting the corners of his lips as he blurred forward, cutting through the youkai swarming in defense of the head. What the sword touched crumbled, turning to ash and floating away before it could even touch the ground. Kouga let out an angry expletive as Sesshoumaru completely bypassed the head, bringing Tenseiga up and slashing down violently.
"You worthless mongrel!" A face screamed, appearing in the air. Sesshoumaru brought the sword up again and was bringing it down when the youkai surrounding Kagome and Kouga surged up to him, forming a solid sphere around him.
"You'll regret being the mutt's bitch Ka-Go-Me!" The disembodied head snarled, leveling a look at the miko. Despite being awed by the sword slashing through the youkai as if they were paper, she allowed her eyes to meet the deep red.
For a moment it felt like the ground was swimming beneath her, and she fell to her knees and clutched her head, trying to still the sudden throbbing as the roar of her blood pulsing blotted out any other noise. Several different shades of purple and black were pulling themselves down over her vision, almost like lowering blinds on a window, each shade darker than the last.
"No, Kagome, wake up!" Kouga snapped, shaking her. Belatedly she thanked her brain for allowing her to faint, the pain was only getting worse with the wolf's worried, snapping movements.
So far gone was she that when Kouga was pushed aside and Sesshoumaru shook her, she didn't even notice. Nor did she notice his power trying to provoke her own, an action that had become all too familiar.
"Do not sleep miko, there is no time," His voice commanded.
She gave in and passed out, allowing the darkness to swallow her.
"Why does her ki not respond?" Sesshoumaru demanded, staring at the old youkai that was staring worriedly down at the still form of the miko.
"It's sealed. Hell of a seal too, haven't seen anything like this in a long time. You said the thing called itself the dark spirit of the jewel?" Totosai asked, still staring at the woman asleep on the ground.
"Yeah, he said Kagome's powers should have been sealed, then kept laughing about how it wasn't necessary. He called her weak, like he did Sesshoumaru. Then toward the end he said she'd regret, well, it doesn't matter. He just made eye contact with her, and she fainted," Kouga explained, his eyes darting back and forth from the blacksmith to the miko, then to Sesshoumaru.
"Why are you here then?" Sesshoumaru demanded. "If not to be useful."
"That sword, Bakusaiga, needs a sheath. I've been waiting awhile for you to get your head out of your ass and free it."
"Does the old man always speak in riddles?" Kouga asked the air, not really expecting an answer.
"That sword isn't a fang or a bone or anything normally used to create a sword. Bakusaiga is an expression of Sesshoumaru's power, of his desire to win, and his ability to stand on his own. It even takes it's traits from his personality. It's poison to anything it touches, disabling regeneration and completely obliterating every trace of it's mark. Truly a sword for the killing perfection," The blacksmith explained, the last bit said in an almost mocking tone.
"A true extension of myself," Sesshoumaru mused aloud, looking to the blade, eyes dancing over the strange markings.
"It is that. Everything in my shop started a-singing, and I knew it was time to find the pup. The sheath is a gift from Bokusenou. He knew this was coming up, donated one of his older, stronger branches for the purpose. Remember to tell him thanks next time you see him," The elder admonished.
"What of the miko?" Sesshoumaru pressed, handing the sword to Totosai, who took a moment to admire the blade.
"You've surpassed even your father, and you no longer have need of his legacy," He answered instead, making Kouga stamp his feet impatiently and begin stalking in circles around the field.
"Blacksmith, answer me, or I will test Bakusaiga on you," He threatened quietly, doing his level best not to growl.
"Her powers have been sealed. Until you can destroy Magatsuhi, the seal will stay, unless of course, he suddenly decides to be generous and remove the seal himself, and I'm pretty sure Naraku will hand over the jewel and sing praises to your name before that happens," Totosai grumped. "For now, get her someplace warm, have some food ready for when she wakes up. We'll, she might get sick first. Awful lot of darkness lingering. Don't want to think about what it's doing to her mind," He observed, moving to the three eyed oxen and rooting through the bags.
After several minutes he came back, the sword sheathed in glossy wood that shone brilliantly even in the dim light of the cloudy afternoon.
"Is she trapped in the core?" Sesshoumaru asked quietly.
"Now how would you know about that?" Totosai asked, throwing a sideways glance in the daiyoukai's direction. When no answer was forthcoming, he continued on, more intrigued by the current turn of events than he had been by anything in a long time. "Even if she was, what would you do about it? She's there, you're here."
"I will bring her back."
"You know, I'd heard from your mother that you went into hell and brought those two kids back, but the core's a little different. A place and not a place, you understand. You can't just go-"
"This Sesshoumaru has before," The daiyoukai replied coldly, cutting the old man off. Totosai eyed the inu warily, wondering if perhaps the pup's father hadn't gotten everything backwards when making his will.
"You've been there? Alright, that's just dandy. But she might not be trapped. Sometimes being forced into that place is a good thing, gives the body time to recover. With her powers sealed, her body's probably going to be feel a bit strange for a few days."
"Magatsuhi will be dead within days. It will not matter," Sesshoumaru intoned, still staring down at the miko, remembering the hell her core had been. But her powers did not respond anymore, how could he find the pathway if her powers were sealed? How could leaving her in that place hasten any sort of recovery?
"There's a cave not too far off from here," Kouga called out, walking back to the group. The daiyoukai berated himself silently for not even noticing the wolf's absence.
"Let's get her in there, I'll start a fire. Someone needs to go hunt, that and get some snow together to melt for water, she'll need it," Totosai sighed as he hopped on the ox and began moving in the direction Kouga had pointed. Kouga moved forward, but his intentions were cut short when Sesshoumaru picked up Kagome as if she weighed nothing and began walking in the wake of the ox, his eyes seemingly vacant.
Once they were inside, Sesshoumaru ordered Kouga to hunt, and demanded that Totosai go find wood for the fire. The wolf fled, the daiyoukai's aura becoming too oppressive for him to bear, and the blacksmith grumbled about disrespectful youngsters before taking his leave of the cave. Ah Un moved into the cave, and the ox seemed cowed by the presence of the twin headed dragon and shied away, letting out a plaintive lowing that only served to shorten the daiyoukai's temper.
When the dragon positioned itself just so, Sesshoumaru understood the intent behind it, and moved quietly, arranging the woman's bedroll and blankets and then laying her in it, still disturbed by the sickly pallor of her face and the tense muscles that seemed ready to snap like a too tight bowstring.
He was aware of Totosai even before wood clattered to the cave floor. Small sounds served to further irritate him, and just when he was about to turn and snap at the old youkai, he felt the fire spring to life, warmth washing over his back.
"Come to the fire for a second pup. I haven't finished with you yet," The old man mumbled, sitting himself within a foot of the fire. Sesshoumaru sat further away. Though he knew after so many years in a forge Totosai was completely safe, he did not wish to singe his own clothing or hair.
"Yes?" He finally intoned, eager to get through the demented ramblings of the elderly youkai.
"When I agreed to reforge Tenseiga, I did it knowing that you had changed a little bit. You were still an evil prick, and I'm not sure that'll ever change. But you haven't tried to kill me yet, which is a good sign anyway. But let me make something perfectly clear. I know you have a habit of helping out those you deem fit for your help, even if you don't like anyone realizing it. And I'm not saying I even know how you pick those people. But even with the seal, that woman is a powerful miko. Making her pack is asking for trouble," He admonished.
"You did not seem to protest her place in the hanyou's life," Sesshoumaru replied blandly, although rage was beginning to spiral it's warm arms out, spreading fire in their wake at the reprimand.
"He was half human, and even then it was inadvisable. Just what are you thinking?" Totosai demanded.
"She was to be the half-breed's mate. She came to this Sesshoumaru for protection and it was granted."
"Well, whatever your reasons for all that, be careful. She's strong, stronger than even she knows. A false move and she could kill you, even if you don't think so."
"We have combined our power, and we can manipulate the other's with our own. It will not be an issue," Sesshoumaru ground out, determined to end the ridiculous conversation.
"Can you? Huh, now ain't that something? Guess I got nothing to worry about," Totosai said, shrugging it off in such a blithe manner that Sesshoumaru wanted to throw his head clear of his body. Instead, the daiyoukai chose to ignore him and close his eyes, feeling the fires flickering warmth dancing on his skin and listening carefully to the onna's breathing.
He barely acknowledged when Kouga came back and began cutting and spearing meat over the fire, and said nothing when Totosai bid them all farewell.
The afternoon slipped into evening, and the evening into night. When there was still no sign of the miko waking, he told the wolf to sleep. Once the ookami was out, he released a sigh and finally glanced back at the ningen that was causing so many problems. His despised half brother's almost mate, a human, and a miko to boot. Totosai had been correct, although for the wrong reasons.
And now she would be unable to use her powers until he took care of the shikon spirit. He damned his luck, for he had ignored the problem several times despite the requests of his own men. All of them had begged him to take down the spirit that decimated their ranks. He had considered it unimportant.
'Perhaps the kami are laughing at me,' He thought sourly as he moved to the entrance of the cave and stared into the night, briefly lamenting the lack of moon in the sky and the clouds that almost obliterated starlight. A bleak, dark night of little hope, so he allowed himself none. Instead he chose to think it absolutes, and began preparing for every eventuality, including the miko's demise.
