Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto. Vurt belongs Jeff Noon.

Vurt Ninjas 9: In which Kabuto is on who knows what side, and I make up more stuff about the feathers than I can ever justify.
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Naruto had been taking the packet of yellows to work for three days before Kabuto came by again.

He heard the outer door open, and half a minute later a voice called, "Hey, Naruto," as it passed.

Naruto fumbled with the dream snake. "Oh, hey! Kabuto!"

"Yeah?" the man answered, coming back and looking around the doorway.

"Hey, I need to talk--dammit! get in, you piece of--talk to you about something."

Kabuto waited while Naruto forced the snake back into its cage and halted the dreamsmoke, leaning against the door frame.

Naruto went over to the table shoved up against the wall beside the door and fished inside the jacket thrown over it for the package. "Can you tell me what these are?"

Kabuto set the padded bundle of sucker feathers that he'd been delivering on the less-messy part of the table and took the packet. A moment after opening it, he let out a low whistle.

"How'd you get these?" Kabuto asked appreciatively.

"Found them. . . . Really long story. . . ." Naruto muttered, before asking, "What's the selling rate for them?"

"There is no selling rate for yellows," Kabuto answered absently, holding one of the feathers up to the light with care. "These are rare--Cholinesterases."

"Shwhu?" Naruto replied.

"The game's called Cholinesterase," Kabuto replied, letting his arm drop slightly and looking over at him. "It's named after a chemical in venom. They were supposedly made by a real Game Cat--they're impossible to find."

Naruto looked away from the raised eyebrow Kabuto was giving him. "Yeah, so, do you think you could sell them for me?"

"I can't pay you a fraction what these are worth," Kabuto replied. "But if you'll give them to me, I'll get you three lovelies by next week."

"Three lo--three thousand punies?" Naruto replied. "Fuck, sure, take 'em!"

Kabuto chuckled, and gently tucked the yellow back into the packet. "How hot are they?"

"Er."

Kabuto gave him a congenial look. "I appreciate this, Naruto, but I don't want them badly enough to get shot on my way back to the car."

"I don't think they're that bad. I've been carrying them around for the last couple of days--" he scratched the back of his neck at the look on Kabuto's face "--and nobody's jumped me. I don't know anything about it before they came to me."

Naruto was already thinking of what to say when Kabuto questioned him further, because he couldn't tell the truth--he didn't want to implicate Sasuke in anything, didn't want Sasuke's name involved at all--but Kabuto didn't question further. He just nodded and slipped the feathers into the inner pocket of his jacket.

"Is Mr. Jiraiya in?" Kabuto asked.

"Yeah, in the filming studio . . . there was one other thing I wanted to ask."

"Mm?" Kabuto said, glancing back over his shoulder from where he'd already turned toward the door.

Naruto scratched a forearm, then absently wondered if he'd picked up fleas anywhere. "Is there any way I can talk to the guy that makes Konoha?"

A grin slipped onto Kabuto's face. "You are."

Naruto blinked, and then stared.

"No way! Really?"

Kabuto glanced downward, grinning a little sheepishly. "Well, it's not all my idea; I was contacted by a Game Cat. But most of the technical work is mine, and I got to design some of the non-player characters."

Despite the modest expression, he sounded proud. Naruto grinned. "That's awesome!"

"Thanks," Kabuto said, looking back up with a smile before beginning to frown. "Did you have a problem with the latest feather or something?"

"Uh, no, not. . . ." Naruto shifted, then leaned against the chair in front of the desk. "How did you design it? I'm not trying to steal anything, I was just wondering. 'Cause some of the characters are a lot like people we know in real life--it's cool, but it's still freaky."

"Ahh," Kabuto said, turning all the way around again and leaning against the frame once more. He nodded. "I designed it like that. The non-player characters have general personalities, but if they're similar to someone a player knows in real life, then they'll imprint those traits; but others have nonprintable personalities. Like--how far in are you?"

Naruto had both eyebrows raised, and noted to himself that Kabuto was a hell of a better operator than he'd first thought. "We're looking for that Tsunade chick right now. Sak--the guys I'm playing it with say they're bored because their characters aren't doing anything and they just have to watch mine's actions."

"Aheh," Kabuto chuckled, adjusting his glasses. "Yeah, I got a little too focused on one storyline and didn't prepare enough for multiple players. . . ." He looked back at Naruto, grinning. "But, that means you've learned that I'm a traitor?"

Naruto began to think he should just keep an eyebrow up. "You sound . . . proud."

"Are you kidding?" Kabuto replied. "It took me months to fine-tune that guy. He's probably my best work. He's one of the examples of a nonprintable character."

"Ahh . . ." Naruto replied. "Okay."

The corner of Kabuto's mouth curved up a little bit. "I know. The Game Cat called me narcissistic when I showed him the designs," he admitted. Naruto snickered.

A moment later, Naruto swung the chair around and sat down, folding his arms absently over the back. "All right," Naruto said. "Thanks. That--yeah, that makes it less creepy."

Kabuto gave him another little grin, then picked up his packet of sucker feathers. "You're welcome. I'll get the lovelies to you by the time I come back; if I have to, I can trade them to the Game Cat for the money."

Naruto nodded, even as he was muttering, "'Game Cat,' 'Game Cat,' sheesh. It always annoys me how those guys think they're too good for a name."

"Oh, no," Kabuto said, glancing over his shoulder as he headed out the door. "He calls himself Orochimaru."