Saint H's Wrestling Hurts More Than I Thought It Would But Is Still Extremely Fun Author's Notes:
Sorry for the delay, but between 'another' break up)actually, it wasn't so much a break up as she turned out to be a major-whoreass-greedy-motherfucking-bitch and I've decided that she isn't worth my worth-less time) and deciding to become a wrestler now that football is over(Wrestling hurts, a lot, but it's the most fun I've had in a long time, also it lets me work out aggression from a certain BITCH WHO I AM LAMELY BLASTING ON THE NET! UGH!)
Disclaimer: When the whistle blows, throw up your arm to break their grip, throw up the knee on the same side, then stand up and turn around as fast as you can.
Chapter 9 KoleThe Tit-Ans, dressed in their snow-gear, were walking around the North Pole… for no discernable reason whatsoever. Why do we care? Because the Titans are badass, and even a needless change of setting can be overlooked because of Raven with white puffies on her cloak. I mean seriously, look, Raven has WHITE FLUFFIES around the edge of her snow cloak! Isn't that fucking hilarious! I laughed my ass of, oh right, writing the story, my bad.
So there the Titans were, marching along the icy landscape, and much to the other's chagrin, Beast Boy was singing a song.
"Loo Loo Loo! I've got some apples!" the green changeling chirped merrily.
"Somebody please make him shut up." Raven moaned.
"Loo Loo Loo! You've got some too!"
"I'm gonna do more than shut him up if he doesn't stop here in a second." Cyborg groaned.
"Loo Loo Loo! Lets get toge-"
CR-CRAAAAK!
A large fissure opened up in the ice.
"Super Duper." Robin ejaculated(spurt) before the ice broke and all the Titans fell down into a mysterious black pit.
Starfire, who for some reason wasn't flying, shouted to the heavens, "With my Dying Breath I curse you Frodo Nine-Fingers!" and with that she was swallowed by the darkness.
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"Stay here Gnarrk, I'm gonna go take a bath." Kole said, heading for a lake.
"Gnarrk." He responded.
Translation: Why of course my good lady please go and cleanse thyself in yonder lake whilst I stay here and excavate the bogeys out of my nostrils and the swallow them for pleasure.
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A pterodactyl flew over head.
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Gnarrk began to pick his nose.
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"Is everybody OK?" Robin asked overbearingly.
"I'm good." Cyborg said.
"I'm goth." Raven responded.
"I am horny!" Starfire chirped.
Robin's eyemask widened a little at that, "Ummm, right, so, where is Beast Boy?"
Thud, thud, thud, thud,
"What's that noise?" Raven asked.
"I dunno but it's coming from that bush." Cyborg pointed.
The four Titans snuck up behind the bush making the noise and dove in only to find…
"SSSSSSSSSSSSSHH! Dudes, don't make so much noise!" Beast Boy said as he went along thud about his thud business. Thud, thud,
"BB this isn't really the time or place to do that-" Robin was cut off by seeing the pink haired, and quite naked, beauty playing around in the lake.
"What are you guys looking at- Oh." Cyborg spotted the same thing.
Ziiip, ziiipThudthudthudthudthudthudthudthudthudthudthudthudthudthud
Starfire stared furiously at the boys, especially Robin, "Hmph, boy are most disgusting creatures, yes Raven?" she inquired of the dark girl.
Raven quickly pull her hand out from under the bottom of her leotard, "Ahem, I'm sorry, what was that Starfire?"
"…Grrrrrrrrr…"
(spurt)
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Dr. Light stood somewhere of no consequence being his boring little self, "Here's more of me being a total douche bag!" he said cheerily.
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Just then, in a prison over at the Brotherhood of Evil's headquarters…
Hot Spot(fully clothed) looked over his cards at Wildebeest(in only boxers)…
Wildebeest(in only boxers) looked over his cards at Hot Spot(Fully clothed)…
"Show em." Hot Spot said, putting down his hand, "I got two pair!"
"… Nnnngh" Wildebeest showed his hand, pocket deuces.
"YES! I WIN! TAKE IT OFF YOU BIG HAIRY BEAST!" Hot Spot celebrated.
Wildebeest stood up and dropped the boxers.
"…" Hot Spot instantly froze, "I…. I-I thought you were a girl Wildebeest."
"Ngh…" Wildebeest responded quietly.
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Superman sat in the Watchtower with the Flash.
"So Clark, we gonna do anything about this 'Bro-hood uh Eval' and their black hole generators or what?"
"Nah." Superman said non-chalantly.
Flash just stared at the Man of Steel for a few moments of uncomfortable silence, "And why no-"
"TAKE ME WALLY!" Wonder Woman screamed as she jump the Flash from off-screen, motion blurs cover her very naked body.
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Dr. Light stood atop his machine, with Kole strapped to it, "I will now do something totally douche baggish as I am the worst villain ever! HAHAHA!"
The Titans just kinda stood there, looking bored.
"You got this one, GNOBU." Cyborg said.
"Gnarrk." The Titans corrected.
"Yea, whatever, go get em GARGOYLE, I'll just intentionally get your name wrong to piss you off."
"Gnarrk." The caveman responded.
Translation: Up yours Flashlight Fucker.
Gnarrk then attack Dr. Lig-
ZZZZZZZZzzttCHHKT…This is the FF Admins, we regret to inform you that the following fight scene cannot be shown because we forbid images of Cavemen ramming wrenches of supervillains buttocks, we now return you to your regular fic…
ZZZZttt…
"That was amazing Gnarrk!" Kole thanked the Caveman.
"Yea, good job, GUMBY!"
"Gnarrk." The Titans corrected Cyborg.
Over in the distance Dr. Light wailed, "Oh God I've got a wrench shove up my ass!"
They all laughed long and hard, "Hahahahahahahahahahahahahah!"
"Hah, hahaha!"
"Hehhehehehe!"
"Teehee!"
"Ohohohohohohohohoho!"
"Snnktt- hahaha!"
"Gnarrk!"
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They all stood there.
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Kole slowly slipped her hands up Gnarrk's loin cloth.
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(spurt)
