CHAPTER NINE
ERIC
Gracie and I fell asleep in each other's arms last night. I don't think either of us could deal with Bill's pain. Even though we weren't with him, we both knew he was suffering. I could hear his screams… I can't think about that.
"Eric? You okay?" Gracie asks me as she wakes up.
"Yeah," I say. I try to shake off the events of the previous night. "Do you think Bill's up for visitors yet?"
"Dean promised to call us," she reminds me gently.
"I hate waiting."
"I know you do… But he needs time."
I grumble an incoherent response. Right now, I hate time, too. I wish I could just see him already… I need to see for myself that he's alright.
Gracie seems to realize I'm not doing so well with the whole waiting thing. She kisses me to distract me, and I'm good with that for a minute. The problem is, even that's not enough.
"I hate it, too," she tells me. I nod. At least Gracie understands.
We both get ready to handle the day ahead. I hope I'll be able to see Bill sometime today, but there's other stuff I need to do, too. This includes swinging by my mother's house to see her. I do it every time I'm in town. My Ma means the world to me, and right now, I really need to see her.
"You wanna come meet my Ma?" I ask Gracie.
She blinks at me. "Seriously?" She asks.
"Yeah. You're my girlfriend. That's what girlfriends do."
"Is it too soon?"
"We've been friends for a while. You've been a huge part of my life for ages already. She'll want to meet you."
Gracie nods. "Okay," she says.
So, a little while later, we're at my Ma's place. Ma opens her arms and pulls me into a much-needed hug. "Eric!" She says. "I missed you!"
"I missed you, too, Ma," I say. "This is Gracie. She's my girlfriend."
Ma looks her over. "Welcome, Gracie," she says warmly, apparently deciding she approves. "Come on in."
We walk in and I immediately smell the wonderful aroma of Ma's cooking. Damn, it's good to be home! "So, what, no Billy today?" Ma asks. She's probably the only person in the world that calls him Billy.
"Um… No, not today," I say. "He's otherwise occupied."
"Too busy for me now that he turned on you, or just afraid I'll knock him upside the head with my rolling pin?"
Gracie laughs. "I like her," she says.
"Definitely the latter, Ma. He knows you'll kick his ass," I say.
"Damn right! Shame on him!" Ma understands kayfabe and she's just joking, but if only she knew… She's got no idea about the supernatural and I'd like to keep it that way. She's safer.
We sit down at Ma's table and she serves up the most delicious food I've ever tasted. Gracie definitely seems to agree as she eats a healthy amount herself.
Gracie's phone rings and she excuses herself from the table. "I like her, Eric. She's sweet, and the sense of humor's strong in that one," Ma tells me.
"Yeah. I like her, too," I say with a laugh.
"Is everything okay with you and Billy? You seem upset."
"We're fine, Ma. It's just… Work's been stressful lately." That's the truth for damn sure.
"Well, try not to get too caught up in it, Eric. Stress is no good for you." She kisses me on top of my head before walking away to get dessert.
Gracie comes back in looking freaked out. "What's wrong?" I ask her.
"Don't worry about it," Gracie says quickly.
"You know I will. Just tell me."
She sighs. "That was Lexy. She's in a bit of trouble."
"Why?"
"Lesnar's been following her around and being a creep since everything happened. He's trying to make a point of showing her he's everywhere and she can't get away. You know Lexy doesn't scare easily, but she did finally get sick of him stalking her, so she sort of let loose with the lightshow and… Well… Lesnar had a seizure."
"Wait… She did what?"
"She started flashing him with a bunch of different lights until he literally went into a full-blown seizure. Lesnar's fine, but Paul was pretty pissed at her."
"She was defending herself. Lesnar's dangerous, and he already tried to fucking rape her, Gracie! Who knows what will happen if he gets his hands on her when no one's around to shoot him in the head?"
"Who are we shooting in the head?" Ma asks as she returns. This isn't an entirely weird conversation. Ma's used to random violence being part of our conversations sometimes. It's just a neighborhood thing.
"No one," I say quickly.
"Eric… Should I worry?"
"Nah, you're too pretty to worry. You're gonna get all wrinkly." I kiss her cheek. "We're fine, Ma. No worries."
She nods, assuming I'm just using the expression again and don't mean I'm literally going to shoot someone.
After we finish dessert, it's time to go. I hate leaving, but I know it's better. It's dangerous to spend too much time here right now. I could lead Team Baddie right to my Ma, and I'd never forgive myself if she got caught in the crossfire of a supernatural battle she knows nothing about.
GRACIE
We get back to the hotel pretty late. I am really glad I got to meet Eric's mom. She's awesome.
"You should check on Lexy," Eric says.
I nod. He's right. I head to her room. "Hey, Lex," I say when she opens the door.
She looks at me and I can tell something happened. "Are you alright?" I ask. I notice a nasty cut on her lip and my eyes go wide.
"I'm okay," she says. "Better than the other guy."
"What other guy?" I ask.
"I got jumped by Raj. It's no big deal."
"No big deal?!" I stare at her. "Are you hurt? I'm gonna fucking kill him…"
"Gracie! I'm fine. Calm down."
"What the hell happened?"
She lets me into her room and I sit on the bed, freaking out. Lexy offers me a soda, which I take on autopilot.
"So, basically, Stephanie's pissed I attacked Lesnar, since he's supposed to be main eventing the pay-per-view tomorrow. She sent Raj after me as punishment," Lexy explains.
"Raj is a 'roid-raging monster!" I say in horror.
"Yeah. I figure that's why Stephanie thought he'd make a good substitute for Lesnar. Anyway, Raj tried to sneak up on me, but I knew he was there. I always know. So I turned around and I knew I was screwed, and I said, 'Come at me, bro!'"
"You're not even joking, are you?"
"Nope. He looked at me funny, then charged… So I tripped him. He hit his head."
"You… tripped him?"
"I improvised, yeah. Anyway, he was pretty pissed, and he attacked again. I wasn't too worried… Raj is a lot of things, but he's not a rapist, so he's one up on Lesnar. I knew he'd never cross that line, so I figured I could handle anything else he threw at me. He tried to attack a few more times, but I'm quicker than he is. I finally ducked as he charged me again, and he hit a wall at full speed and knocked himself unconscious. So this cut on my lip? It's literally my only injury. I'm okay."
"But Stephanie sent a monster to attack you… Why aren't you more freaked out?"
"Because I outsmarted said monster with quick-thinking and quicker reflexes, and that's kind of awesome. I'm okay. I walked away. That's all that matters. She won't do it again. It would be a waste of her resources."
"Okay, fine… But I'm still worried about you."
"Don't be. I'm good." She pauses. "Okay, I lied a little… I'd rather not sleep alone tonight, Gracie. Just in case."
"Say no more. I'm crashing."
She hugs me. "Thanks."
"Any time."
I can't believe Stephanie pulled this shit… Yet I actually can, because that's who she is. Still, I don't like that she sent Raj after Lexy. It could have ended up a lot worse. I look at my friend and I'm grateful she's safe. I try not to think about what could have happened, because the only thing that matters is she survived the attack and she's in good shape. I decide to heal her lip. Lexy doesn't protest, and we relax before finally curling up together on her bed and falling asleep.
BILL
I'm doing significantly better tonight. It turns out I didn't have as much to process as Randy, Colby, and Jules thought. Casey already helped me a lot. After Randy and Jules leave to get some rest, Colby stays with me.
"Will I ever stop feeling guilty?" I ask him.
"No," he says. "Not fully."
I look at him and ask what I've been afraid to. I don't want to upset him, but I need to know someone gets what I'm dealing with… Betraying the best friend you call brother is impossibly hard to cope with. "Colby… What really happened with you? I mean, I know some of the details, but the specifics… No one talks about them."
Colby hesitates. Finally, he sighs. "You need to hear it. You, more than the others…" He shakes his head. "I did a lot of horrible things right after they turned me, Bill. You saw the violence on-screen. You saw how badly I physically hurt Joe and Dean, and they were so confused… Neither one understood what had happened. After the show, my body ran off… And went to the house we're in right now. This safe house wasn't always safe… It was hell. It was the darkest place in the world, and I made it that way… I took Serena." I know Serena's the girl Joe and Dean both care deeply about who Matty fried into possibly never functioning again. "I didn't hurt her in the traditional sense… I used my telepathy, and I slipped into her head, and I made her believe she wanted to be mine… Serena was still young, but she had a crush on me. I knew that. I used it. So while I was gentler with her than I could have been, and while for her, it didn't seem like it… Technically, my body raped her. And that's very hard for me to deal with, because I love that girl. I did so much to try to protect her… I took care of her when no one else was paying attention… Serena forgave me immediately, and it helped, but… But it's still hard to deal with, especially with how she ultimately ended up."
"That's awful," I say. I don't bring up the other part. I wait for Colby to go there.
"The worst thing, though… The thing I'll never forgive myself for… Was what happened to Aria." His voice cracks at her name. "She was just a baby… And she brought so much light to us all."
"I don't know much about this," I admit. "No one talks about her."
"It's too hard… It's kind of crazy how it happened. One day, Bryan of all people came across her. He likes kids, and he knew Vince had her, which couldn't be good… So he started talking to her, and she saw Dean on TV… And she said, 'hey, he looks like my dad.' Bryan immediately made the assumption that Dean was Aria's brother. The thing was, at the time, Dean was still evil. When the Shield first came up to the main roster, we were all Vince's bitches. I hated it… I would do what he wanted, and then I'd cry because I hurt someone and it was so against my nature. I was never evil. Joe and Dean handled the darkness better. They tried to protect me from the worst of it, and especially from Vince and his wrath… But then Joe fell in love with the girlfriend Vince had essentially given to me… And when she almost died from venom, Joe called out to Serqet knowing she'd recognize his soul and he would probably get smited, but he didn't care. He saved her life. And although he had betrayed him, the head of his pantheon, who his soul had been hiding from since before entities began incarnating, forgave him. He let him go and gave him a chance, and Joe rose to the occasion. He immediately became good, and he stole my girlfriend." He laughs sadly.
"That's low," I say.
"She's his soul's consort. It was meant to be… Besides, I loved her dearly, but more like a sister. She meant the world to me. She's the one whose head I got stuck in trying to help her… But she was meant for Joe. Anyway, as soon as Joe left, I was like, 'hey, we can do that? I'm so in!' And I joined Team Good. Taker accepted Joe right away, and he realized pretty quickly that I was relatively harmless and let me prove myself to him, and he accepted me, too. But Dean… Dean wouldn't join us. He was furious we'd left him behind. Mostly, he was terrified because he didn't think he could ever be good. He knew Team Good would never accept him. He even hurt Serena, and that meant Joe wouldn't accept him, either. I was terrified there was no hope for him because he wouldn't even try, but I didn't give up on him."
"You were brothers."
"Exactly. Anyway, Bryan saw this little girl and he took a risk. Of all people, Bryan was the one who thought, 'hey, maybe we can give Dean one last chance.' And he left that sweet little girl with Dean. Within minutes, Dean was extremely attached to the kid. Here with this little girl who, as it turns out, was his baby sister. She was eight and defenseless, and Vince had kept her hidden from him to use as a weapon when it suited him. Aria was young and a bit traumatized, but she was a tough kid… She was sarcastic, too. Dean loved that about her. She made him laugh, and as soon as she did, this little slither of light forced its way into his heart and he knew he had to protect her… And that meant leaving Vince. He took her and he left Team Vince, and he never looked back. Bryan's one act of trust really saved Dean from the dark side. We all fell in love with her immediately. April took her out as her tiny sidekick for a day and came home with a puppy. Cody turned the puppy immortal… That pug that's always growling at Dean that he acts like he hates but he obviously adores? That was Aria's puppy. Ariane got really close to her, too. She had the kid saying 'Girl, Bye,' and all of that. She had a background in social work, so Dean basically asked Ariane to be her shrink, and she was happy to do it. Anyway, it turned out that Aria was sick. Vince had ignored the symptoms, but she had brain tumors and a lot of other issues… Dean was terrified, but he took care of her. He took her to the hospital and she was getting treated… And she was under lock and key, but one of the people Dean trusted betrayed us." He shakes his head. "Ariane kidnapped her from the hospital and brought her to me… And I…" He shakes his head again. Colby is crying now.
"Colby… It's okay. You don't have to talk about this," I say. I feel how much pain he's still in.
"No… I do. You need to know. You're not like the others, Bill. You're stronger. And you deserve to know the entire story of how this happened."
"So what happened?"
"I killed her." He's still crying. "She fought me, even with how sick she was, so I literally squeezed her head until the issues inside all basically ruptured… I crushed her head… It was horrible and painful and… And I could hear it. I could hear every thought she had as she died, but I couldn't stop myself because I wasn't in my body… I couldn't do anything… I couldn't save her. I murdered my best friend's baby sister… The kid who literally saved him from the dark side… I did that."
"Colby… It wasn't your fault. You weren't in control of your body. It was a shell."
"Exactly. Just like when you did what you did." He shakes his head again. "She died in Dean's arms. He got there just after it was too late to actually save her, and Dean hadn't found his superpower yet… He couldn't heal yet. He found out he could do that a little while later, when someone else he loved almost died, and he refused to let it happen again. Anyway, Dean broke. He literally shattered. His friend, the one who helped him make this safe house, came running when she found out what had happened. Dean looked at me, and he knew what he had to do, but he couldn't… He couldn't kill me. And I turned around, and there was Joe, with a knife… And he looked at me with the fiercest look he's ever had, but I also saw his tears… He said, 'I'm sorry,' and then he shoved a knife into my chest where my heart should have been. It shouldn't have killed me, but it was a magickal knife, and even though I didn't have a heart to stab, it put me down. I was dead… And he apparently held my body for a minute after, but he didn't cry. Joe didn't let himself cry until after Dean was better and I was fixed and healed. He held himself together for us. When he finally broke, it was bad."
"I had no idea it was so horrible…"
"Dean really lost it for a while. He was ready to kill himself. I think the only thing that stopped him was the fact that he'd somehow created a safe house and he knew people needed him… He stuck around for Serena, and his friend Mara got him through it… She's the one that fried Corey Graves. Anyway, he was in bad shape. He told everyone to call him Jon, because he couldn't connect to Dean anymore without all of the pain that went along with it. You know Dean's in bad shape when he goes by Jon. He hates that name. Anyway, he figured out Ariane was evil, and that Trinity had suspected and never told us… He actually banned Trinity from his house, and Johnny and Josh cut her out for a bit because they were pissed… But Trinity wasn't evil, and eventually, Johnny took her back and they worked things out. Ari, though, was kicked out of our lives for good, and ultimately, she got released from WWE and was no longer our problem. It took them three weeks to fix my body. Cody had to work endlessly to figure it out, and they found my heart with TJ, and my soul…" He hesitated. "My soul was hidden in the Forgotten Land. It was the absolute worst place Chaos could keep me, and he didn't just keep me stored in a jar… He took me out. He tortured me. Three weeks felt like three centuries… I… I shattered. My mind completely broke. I took Randy and Jules with me through all of it… Being turned, the things I did after, the torture of my soul… They're the only ones who know everything that happened to me, and we never talk about it because it's too hard… I think the only reason they didn't lose their minds along with me was because they had each other to ground to."
"The Forgotten Land… That's where Nikki and Brie were."
"Yes. Vince routinely goes through there looking for new recruits for his army… But he wasn't coming through when I was there. I like to think Vince would have saved me, bad guy or not. He views me as one of his. He wouldn't just let Chaos take me away. It's a horrible place… A place no one should ever be… And the things Chaos did to my soul… I wish I could forget, but he made sure I remembered it all." He's trembling.
"Colby… Maybe you should stop."
"I fought to stop them from cutting out my heart. I struggled like I've never struggled before. I didn't know what was happening. I thought they were going to kill me… But then I heard their thoughts and I knew it was so much worse… I tried so hard to stop it, but I couldn't. Chaos wanted Stephanie to be the one to cut out my heart, but she didn't have the stomach for the ritual. It freaked her out too much. She actually ran out of the room in tears. Nikki, though… She was hardcore. She volunteered and she did it… And you know how that feels. It was done to you. I don't have to tell you. But they weren't good at it yet. They were new to the ritual. I was the first… So it took longer, and I bled more, and they had to torture me before they could even get me down… It took hours, Bill. Hours of being tortured over and over, and having them take turns seeing who could fuck me up worse… And when it was over, and they pulled my soul out, the torture didn't stop. Chaos doesn't do that anymore. He just keeps the souls stored… But he told me mine was special… I was his first… And he wanted to play with me." Colby's hyperventilating now.
"Colby, it's okay… It's over. It's been over for a long time," I say. I touch his arm and Colby calms down. He looks at me.
"I get it now… You're a redeemer, Bill. Your light is so strong it even makes people who never wanted to be light want to change. It saves people. That's why he wanted you… And it heals wounds…" He looks at me curiously and asks, "May I?"
I shrug. "Okay," I say.
Colby touches my forehead and I know he's in my mind, but he's not looking through my memories… He's showing me his. Everything he's just told me flashes through my head. The things he can't go into detail about are there, too. And suddenly, he's not crying anymore. I see him in my mind, and he's filled with light.
He pulls away. "Jesus…" He whispers. "I feel like a darkness I never knew was weighing me down just exploded into pure light."
"Is that… good?" I ask.
"It's incredible…" He shakes his head and laughs. "Thank you, by the way… I think you just healed something in me that no one's been able to touch."
I look at him, and I see it. He's lighter… He looks more like he used to, before what happened. It's subtle, but powerful. "I did that?" I ask.
"Yeah, Bill. You did… And now I know why he wanted you more than anyone else… Because even after being turned and tainted forever by his darkness, your light is too powerful to stop."
"What does that mean, exactly?"
"Your heart is the purest of all… It's why you literally always do the right thing when it counts. It's why you saved Nikki… I saw it in her mind, before you ask. It's why you feel bad that Gracie hurt Leah even if she had it coming… And it's why, even though you were turned, you were able to split your soul so he couldn't touch part of you… You preserved that pure light. There's a part of you he never touched, a part that can never be tainted even by force. You're the one, Bill. The strongest heart he's ever found."
"How screwed does that make me?"
"He'll keep coming for you… But you'll keep fighting, because that's who you are. And in the end, it should be enough."
"Enough to what?"
"Enough to save whoever you're meant to. You can't save everyone, Bill. No one can. But you can make a difference. And you will."
"No pressure or nothing…"
"No, none at all." He laughs sadly. "I understand how you feel there. I'm the one who can track his victims. I'm the first person he turned and the first to come back. I'm basically cursed, but that's okay. I've learned to embrace it and help people."
"I can't believe you came back from all of that… How did you cope with it?"
"I was catatonic for weeks. I didn't function. My doppelganger was very much employed for months because I couldn't do anything. That's why my promos turned to shit when I was first heel turned." He laughs and shakes his head. "My poor little doppelganger tries so hard, but he flubs a lot… Anyway, finally, I began coming out of it… Joe was there for me, and Dean… Dean made it clear he never blamed me… He cried his eyes out begging me to come back, because we were brothers, and he'd lost a sister and couldn't lose his brother, too… And I fought my way back to them. It was hard as hell, but I did it. When I started to try, I let Jules and Randy help me, because they were in my head anyway, and they got me to a point where I could respond to Joe and Dean… And eventually, I was me again. I was broken, and I was terrified, but I was in control. I didn't trust myself, though. I refused to step into the ring for a while. Dean and Joe had to coax me back in slowly. Eventually, I adjusted… And life went on, hard as it was… And I worked hard to find a purpose in the world. I fought for the light. I found out I could track the others, and it helped… It gave me a reason to fight. And I haven't stopped fighting since."
"Thanks for telling me all of this. I know how hard it was for you. I can feel it."
"It's okay… You helped me today, Bill. I set out to help you, but I guess it became a mutual thing."
I'm relieved I've managed to do something useful, but I'm also freaking out. It's kind of scary to think I'm special to Chaos, a genuine threat and not just a random minion he felt like collecting. I just hope I'm not as screwed as I think I am.
