This chapter shows you Castiel's home life and what he does on his saturday evening and sunday without Dean.

Hope you enjoy the chapter. xx


By the time Castiel reached his house, his brothers cars were well and truly blocking up the drive way. Gabriel's Red Audi R8 V10 sports car was reflecting the sun as it parked in front of Michael's Volkswagen Touareg 2.5 TDI, with tinted windows. With a sigh he made his way to the house, here we go again he thought. As he got to the door his breath got caught and he felt sick as his heart exploded. His eyes were drawn to the 70's Honda 4 stroke XL250s leaning against the house, there was no mistaking who's it was. Cas couldn't believe it, he even had to reach out and grip the handle to make sure it was real. When ever any relative came he always prayed to see this bike but never did and now it's here in the same place it used to be. His eyes rested on his brother's bike, he felt a smile spread across his face as a million memories flooded his mind thousands involving the very same bike. unfortunatly his mind stopped on the last time he saw this bike, driving away out of his life seemingly for good, the worst day of his life. Now his brother was back, he hadn't seen Balthazar for such a long time.

Though this smile soon faded when he opened the front door as dread set in, dread and deep, deep fear. The last time everyone was together like this there was a huge fight, since then he hadn't seen Balthazar, it has been years the bastard just cut him out of his life, unfortunately not without reason. Cas bit his lip when he came into the living room, there sat four older men, when the boys saw Cas they all stood to greet their little brother. Cas stood in the door way, feeling ashamed he was scared, but he swallowed and held his breath as he stepped into the room and joined his family, being the youngest the others were quite a few inches taller. they looked down at their younger brother and smiled. Gabriel was the first to speak, well not so much speak he put his arms around Cas.

"It's good to see you Cas." he whispered in his brothers ear. It took a few seconds but soon Cas gently put his arms around his brother and hugged back.

"You too Gabriel." Gabriel let him go, he rested his hands on his brother shoulders and looked at the boy he hasn't seen in five months.

"You're hairs gotten long." He joked with the boy.

"You too." Cas told him taking note of how Gabriels is now rather shaggy, he knew their father wouldn't approve of Gabe looking so untidy probably Cas thought that this was probably the reason he grew it. His brother smiled in response, winked as he patted Cas on the shoulder and left him and sat back down on the sofa but still watched Cas' intently. Leaving way for Michael to step forward and greet him.

He was more formal than Gabriel, always had been more professional, in his relationships as well as his outlook to life. He put his hand out which Cas took and they shared a firm yet cold hand shake, Michael nodded to his brother who nodded back, he let go and looking behind him. Michael looked to Balthazar, still standing against the wall, the man was simply staring at the boy in front of him, hardly believing it was the same little boy he had regrettably left behind all those years ago.

He slowly straightened up and walked towards his baby brother. Cas' breath hitched in his throat as he felt tears starting to sting his eyes, he tried desperately to blink them away, but found it impossible to even to blink as he stared into his brothers eyes, he missed him so much. When he did manage to blink the tears were already fully formed and slide speedily down his hot cheeks. When Balthazar got to Cas, he wiped his brothers tears away and smiled softly at him.

"Heya Cassie." He sounded hopeful but at the same time desperate that Cas wont hate him and will respond, he did. Unfortunately not the way Balthazar wanted or anyone expected.

Cas has always been a patient, timid, slightly shy child, slow to anger and even slower to be violent. So when Cas open his mouth to speak and found nothing coming out, there was nothing he could say. All his features hardened as he looked to his brother and found his fist suddenly flying towards Balthazar's face, catching him in the nose. "Five years! Five years and all you could think to say was hey! I honestly thought you were dead, you bastard!" he looked to Cas, eyes filled with tears and blood dripping from his nose, he opened his mouth to speak, just as Cas stormed out the room up the stairs and into his room. Balthazar turned walked past Michael and sat next to Gabriel. Gabriel turned to his brother.

"Well that could have gone better."

"Oh I don't know." Balthazar tried to joke. "At least he spoke to me."

Michael sat down next to Balthazar, "He'll calm down."

"Here's hoping." Balthazar told his brother a little uncomfortable with such sudden closeness.


When Cas got to his room he flung himself on his bed and buried his head in his pillow, took a breath and screamed into it, hoping the pillow muffled the volume a little, the scream of anger ended in sobs of bitter sadness but mostly of relief that Balthazar is home and is safe. Though Cas was much too angry and stubborn to admit that at the moment. After about half an hour the smell of food being cooked assaulted and caressed his nose and intoxicated his nostrils with the smell of roast pork sizzling in the oven. It was another half an hour before there was a knock on his door.

"yeah." He shouted still lying on his bad facing the wall.

"Cassie?"

"Get out." Cas told his brother without turning around.

"Please Cassie can I come in?" Cas sighed and nodded, Balthazar entered and gingerly made his way to Cas' bed and sat on the edge. "I now it's not worth much, but I am sorry." Cas huffed in a slight amused chuckle. "Please Cassie don't hate me." Cas' stomach dropped, Balthazar thinks he's hated he couldn't be more wrong. Cas got up and sat next to his brother, he looked to his elder brother who's eyes were fixed on the floor.

"I don't hate you Bolly." Cas gently spoke to his brother, who looked up at the sound of his childhood nickname that Cas called him when he could pronounce his full name as a toddler. They smiled weakly at each other. "Does it hurt?" Cas asked gesturing to his red and slightly swollen nose.

"What this? Na can barely feel it."

"I'll try harder next time then." Cas tried to joke, it worked a smile spread across his brothers face. After a few moment spent in silence Bolly nudged his brother slightly.

"I tried to call you know."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, but lost my nerve after a few rings, even when I could hang on until there was an answer I couldn't speak so hung up. I didn't know what to say, everything seemed so pathetic, the longer I was away the harder it became. At least I got to hear your voice ever so often, even if it was only 'hello.'"

"Well your back now."

"Yeah." Silence fell again, only for a minute or so because Gabriel started to shouted for them. "We should go downstairs, you know what dads like, they wont start dinner 'til were all there." Cas smiled as they got up and went to dinner.


Dinner was awkward but not half as awkward as everyone had expected. They ate in silence every one far too hungry to partake in small talk. When they had finish and were sat around the table, waiting for their dinner to settle before anyone dare move.

"So, balthuzar" Michael started "What part of england did you stay?"

"Oh so you noticed the accent."

"Just a little."

"Erm well I spent a lot of time in london, I visited the peak district a few times and stayed in manchester for a few months on business."

"What kind of business?" their father asked, the first he's spoken all the time Cas had been home and probably since his brothers had gotten there. Of course his father had to talk with suspicion coating his words and superiority over his son. Balthazar resisted the temptation to roll his eyes as he answered.

"Just business, sales that sort of thing."

"Selling what?"

"Whatever really."

"You mean what ever happened to fall of a back of a truck that week."

"Dad!" Gabriel exclaimed shocked at how rude his father was being.

"Despite what you might think dad, my life hasn't gone down the drain because your not controlling it, I have gotten on well on my own. If you must know, I got into university in England, the reason why I went over. I got a job in Manchester during the breaks I managed to make some worth while connections in my field." Their dad was silent stunned at what he was hearing.

"What's your field? What did you study Bolly?" Cas asked.

"Art, well the history and preservation of art and precious objects of the like. I found the preservation of religious objects fascinating, it's crazy what people had faith in." the whole table felt their father tense and boil up. What Balthazar was saying was obviously a direct dig at his dad, who never accepted his father radical beliefs. The smirk Balthazar wore whilst speaking dud nothing to hinder his fathers growing anger who. He knew how much his eldest son being here meant to his youngest, so got up and left the room trying to restrain his anger. When Balthazar caught Cas' eye he winked to his younger brother who did not seem amused.

"Excuse me." He told the table before getting to his feet and promptly leaving. Balthazar dipped his head and wished he hadn't opened his mouth.


The rest of night went slowly, very slowly. All he could think about was Dean, how he much rather be with him than be in his house in his room on his own or with any one of his family right now. He didn't venture out his room for the rest of the night and even locked it so no one could come in, everyone knew that he never used the lock unless its best for everyone that he stays alone, or the only thing to help the boy is to be alone, so when its locked his family keep away and try not to disturb him.

By the time Cas woke on Sunday he only had ten minutes to get ready before they left for church. Cas manage it in half the time, though his hair did have a just rolled out of bed look to it. As Cas descended the stairs his heart dropped instantly and just wanted to go back to bed or cry and maybe run to Dean's place and hide.

Of course, Balthazar had been back less than a day and he and dad were already at each others throats, he was stupid to expect any different. Bolly never liked church and always resented his father making him attend, today was no exception to their long ongoing argument.

"Dad I don't believe god cares okay? He's not listening to our prayers, so surely me going to church and not believing is more of an insult than me respectfully staying away." Balthazar stated as he slouched in an arm chair in trackies and a white vest, not church wear, their father was furious.

"whilst you're under my roof, you do as I say! You believe what I believe!"

"Oh that's great parenting that is! monkey see monkey do, not grow and learn. Let your children have their own opinions."

"You know very well you can have your own opinions, but faith isn't an opinion Balthazar, it's fact. You got that!"

"I'm going to have to respectfully disagree."

"Don't you be cocky with me boy!"

"Say what you like, I am not going."

"You come into my home, eat my food, sleep on my sofa and you disrespect the most important part of my life!"

"Funny, I thought I was supposed to be the most important part of your life, you know your children!" Cas was standing on the stairs, he had heard this argument so many times, not long after Balthazar's comment, the familiar sound of skin on skin contact in some sort of hit or punch fell unmistakably on Cas' ears.

Cas wondered who was hurt this time, there wasn't any hitting or shouting back after, so Cas was almost certain it was his dad that turn violent first, this time. Because Bolly might have inherited his fathers temper but most of the time he wasn't stupid enough to hit first, not when his father reacts with 'an eye for an eye' philosophy.

Soon after the living room fell deadly quite the front door opened and Gabriel poked his head in, he was coming to see if everyone was ready, instead he found his baby brother sitting on the stairs, staring straight ahead, lip trembling and eyes full of tears that were not aloud to fall. Gabriel knew instantly what had happened he had seen this scene too many times before. After getting Cas' attention he outstretched his arm, Cas didn't think twice before diving into his brothers arms and holding tightly to his chest as he sobbed as quietly and discreetly as possible, Gabriel placed a kiss on his brothers forehead.

His tears were not as quiet as he had planned and soon his father was standing at the living room door watching his trembling son and getting daggers shot at him from his other as he shushed and soothed the boy's sobs. Michael was waiting in his car and started to beep his horn, they were going to be late. Gabriel kept eye contact with his father as they left the house, Gabriel took Cas in his car so he didn't have to ride with his father and get angry at him or embarrassed of his tears.


Cas didn't speak all the way to church, he didn't pray in church nor did he talk on the way back home. As he walked through his front door Balthazar was there to greet them, with a black eye. Cas stopped dead in his tracks as he saw his brothers face, but he was not shocked he had seen worse, he had had worse. So soon after he turned and went to his room and wasted not time in locking his door. Five o'clock and no one had seen Castiel since getting back, Michael took him up a cup of tea and a sandwich a few hours ago. He had left it outside his door so at least Cas had eaten as it wasn't there when Gabriel brought up a can of Pepsi for his brother.

"Cas? it's me. I've brought you a drink." There was no answer, "Can you let me in?" once again, silence. "Okay well I'm leaving it here, you know If you want to talk I'm here for you bud." No answer, Gabriel felt defeated that he couldn't help his brother "Dinners in an hour." Gabriel then turned to return downstairs. Cas silently opened his door and watch Gabriel go.

"Thank you." Gabriel turned and saw his brother half visible from his room, hold the drink.

They shared a loving smile before Cas returned to his room. Cas didn't mean to be so unsocial but he couldn't deal with the arguments anymore. He loved his family so much and it hurt him to see them shout at each other, make snide comments about and to each other and generally make each others lives hell. He had enough of it before, Cas didn't want to cry over it anymore, he honestly didn't think there were anymore tears to cry over it. He was wrong.

Cas didn't join them for dinner and he felt bad for it, considering he almost never saw them and he's spending the rare hours he could spend with them hiding away in his room. He knew Monday would make everything okay, Monday he gets to see Dean, tomorrow he knew he could deal with his family, but for tonight his attention falls to Frodo and Sam as he finishes his book.


I tried to make myself sound all knowledgeable about cars and stuff in the first few lines LOL hope it worked :D truth is i'm really not, so I used google so appoligse if what I've wrote for Gabe, Bolly and Michael's vehicles makes no sense.

I gave balthuzar a nickname that only Cas calls him, to make their reltionship stronger well their past relationship, I know it sounds werid but I couldn't think of anything else, i was thinking; Balthazar, zar, what rhymes with zar? star? no star just sounds weak so I settled on Bolly, but Cas did come up with it when he was a toddler so I hope you can forgive me LOL.

Any way, please review they make me happy :D (- thats me after a review lol) xx