Then next morning was cloudy, and Harry pestered Edward telling him that he can play; but Edward ignored him, and answered with a "Trust me, it will be sunny"
At that moment, Dumbledore stepped up to give one of his now extremely common speeches. The crowd fell silent.
"I have two things to say, good and bad. The bad news is, the current Defence Against the Dark Arts Teacher, you all know his name, went to bed last night, bumped his head, and did not get back up in the morning. He has been rushed to the infirmary, but was already dead long before he arrived there. A moment of silence for Mr. Leiderhosen." The hall went silent except for a student or two who was rather happy the old geezer was dead. After a rather long moment of partial silence, Dumbledore spoke again.
"Now for the good news. We have been very fortunate to have already acquired the service of another Defence Against the Dark Arts Teacher. Please welcome Mrs. Esme Cullen as your new teacher." The hall was silent for a moment as Esme stood up from her chair and smiled sweetly. Then applause broke out along with whistles.
It seemed that ever since the Cullens arrived at the beginning of the year, there had been many more speeches, and far more exciting topics for discussion. After Dumbledore gave his speech, Edward force-fed Harry a quick breakfast, before dragging him to the Quidditch field for practice.
"Because you're health is not the best, and you absolutely refuse to let Malfoy win, you will use my Jingleheimer Schmidt." Edward held out is golden-engraved broomstick. Harry petted it lovingly, treating it as if it would shatter at any moment. Edward rolled his eyes and forced Harry to mount it. After that, he drilled Harry incessantly, until the clouds thinned and the sun almost shone through. Edward suddenly looked very frightened, running away at a human speed past the gathering members of the teams.
Harry shrugged and smirked at Malfoy, who was petting his new Jingleheimer Schmidt, glad that he had a weapon against the all-powerful Harry, until he noticed to his dismay that Harry was petting a Jingleheimer Schmidt lovingly too, and did not notice the "Edward" written in curling gold script on the handle.
Soon the game started, and as was to be expected, Gryffindor won. But Harry was curious about the Cullens allergy to the sun, which might have been guessed anyway due to their abnormally pale, cols skin. Though their lack of sunlight could not explain how hard they were. Harry let it slide as Bella ran up to him with Ron and Hermione.
"You were amazing!" said Bella, smiling.
Harry shrugged, "Only because this is the first time you've seen quidditch in action. Now have you seen Edward; I need to give him his broom back." Hagrid replied surprisingly.
"Oh, them Cullens 'ave gone off ter London fer a trip, seeing there be clouds in London, and that Alice wants to get 'erself sum new robes. They drove off in 'em fancy pants Muggle-mobiles of there's. I reckon they be back in a few hours."
"They're allowed off the grounds?" asked Hermoine.
"Tis a lot o' technical stuff and paperwork tha' let em do that. Ye can try ask Dumbledore, but I reckon he don't come with more answers than me." Replied Hagrid, walking away carrying a box of what Harry decided must be some kind of dreadful type of ant they'd have to deal with in class—it did say "Fire Breathing Ants" on the side, so it's pretty obvious.
The day went on until dinner without the Cullens. Alice walked in with some impossibly high Gucci heels with surprising ease. Alice had been spending much on shoes, since the robes they had been assigned left little space for improvisation but shoes.
That dinner was not normal.
Note: this next part is courtesy of my friend Exeterra. To Emmett fans, if you are overly sensitive to things that question Emmett's manliness, please skip over this section. If you would kill me for writing about the destruction of sports cars, also skip over. Thank you.
Emmett was engaged in conversation as usual to drive attention away from his lack of eating. They were discussing whether Ferrari, Lamborghini, Porsche etc… wear better than Audi, Maserati, Volvo etc…Edward tapped Emmett on the shoulder to give his feedback, when—unfortunately—Emmett just so happened to look down.
There on the ground, black, tiny, and utterly harmless…a spider
Emmett's eyes widened and he started to scream—I'll be kind and make his scream unlike a girl's. He jumped onto the table and started running across towards the doors at inhuman speed, his feet making holes in the table as he ran. The doors flew open and a blur sped through them.
A murmuring erupted and the teachers started trying to fix the problem, when Emmett runs back in, holding Edward's lovely, cherished silver Volvo, over his head, and screaming like a maniac, as he sprinted to where the spider crawled, oblivious to what was going on. Emmett smashed down the Volvo on the spider, while Edward, and everyone else just sat, frozen with surprise, and mainly fear at what was happening, while Edward was frozen with rage.
Once Emmett had thoroughly pulverized the spider, Edward exploded—in fact, for humorous effect, can you imagine Edward screaming, and his head exploding, then a new head growing in it's place; thanks.
"Damn it Emmett! Why the **** did you just do that!" screamed Edward, the tables vibrating with the noise.
Emmett started sobbing, "But, Eddy…it-it was a spider Eddy. A s-s-spider Eddy."
"I know you have an incurable fear of spiders, but…damn it Emmett, my car!"
Rosalie had gotten up and started hugging Emmett, while he continued to sob. Edward stared at the wreck of his car, scattered on the floor. A small flame was growing within it, too small to notice. As Edward continued to spaz, the flame spread to what was left of the fuel tank, and the car burst into flames! Panic erupted all around the room, and Bella, who—much to the disappointment of Edward—was sitting beside Harry, who sat beside Edward. Her robes caught in the blaze, and she started screaming, running as the flames consumed her toes. She jumped on the table and dunked her foot in one of the remaining glass punch bowls (Alice had updated the school's silverware and plates and such).
After that, Bella limped her way towards the infirmary, with the aid of Harry. The Cullens were getting rid of the fire, and Emmett was heading to detention. Alice was yelling at Rosalie something like "I didn't see this! Jeesh! I'm not superwoman, even if I look like her…" She had sent Jasper running away with her shoes to save them from damage.
Hermione had expected the teachers to put out the fire by now, and she was getting very frustrated.
"THE SPELL IS FRIGGIN' AGUAMENTI!!" she screamed, pointing the fire as water shot out of her wand. The teachers fell silent as the remainder of the students escaped. Hermione scoffed and strode out of the hall, her nose upturned.
The teachers went on with their business, and dinner was served in the common rooms. Alice was moping, as the damage had made it near impossible for her to host the Halloween dance. Emmett had nearly been expelled, if it were not for the frantic essays by Alice—as is evidently her talent.
Note: to all those people who are desperate for Bella and Edward to get together, tis next chapter.