Chapter 10

Evangeline Moffat

Ezra's hands are scarred. Crisscrossed with cuts fading away. His knuckles are raw and bloody from the fight with Earl. I wash his hands out with a bottle of rubbing alcohol over the bathroom sink and wrap them in gauze I'd found in the cabinet. He scrubs his face until the blood is gone, but I can still smell it. It goes down the drain with water in a pink stream. Earl's blood. Ezra's blood.

I sit on the couch and watch the television with blank eyes, watching the carnage play over and over again. Charlotte Crowe's family have come out with a statement to Paylor and the Agency demanding security reform in the Agency. Three more people died today after being left in critical condition from the first bombing in District 4. Paylor claims that the Agency is doing what they can in following leads on suspects.

Ezra sits down beside me. "Are you okay? He hit you hard." He examines my face. "It's swelling on this side," he tells me. "You got a headache or anything?" I shake my head. "You aren't bleeding," he says at last. "Tell me if you get a headache or throw up."

I'd been hit before, by David. It had been worse before. But then, we'd never killed David. I should've helped Earl. It's my fault he's dead.

"He was a bad person," Ezra says gently, as if reading my thoughts.

"Where's Gale?" I ask abruptly.

"I don't know," he answers, his voice harder at my short reply. I don't apologize. "Probably at the Hob, I don't know."

I cover my ears so I don't have to hear the television. I think of Earl and Leevy Haddix and their kid and I want to throw up from the stench of blood and death. I see Ezra's gauze-wrapped hands and scratched face.

Kissing Ezra in the woods on the way to Gale's house. How much trouble I could get into for one kiss. Garrus Mallory blowing a district off the map. Hebe in District 4. David burning up in a factory. Imala dying in my arms. My daughter dead. My daughter dead, my husband dead, everyone dead.

"Don't cry," Ezra says softly. I hadn't realized I'd been crying. I'm crying. Shit, I'm crying. He wraps his arms around me. I cry into his shoulder. In his embrace, I feel safe.

"Don't cry," he says.

The door flings open, Gale in the doorway. I let go of Ezra and he lets go of me, but there is no mistaking the look on Gale's face. He doesn't address it, though. Instead, in an almost desperate voice, he says, "Where's Mom and Rory and Vick and Posy?"

"School, work, and I don't know about her. Gale, we've got something to tell you," Ezra says, almost reluctantly.

Gale's face contorts with anger. "I don't give a shit right now about whatever that was! Get a grip and listen to me!"

"We went to see Earl-" Ezra breaks in.

"Five people were just killed at the Hob!" Gale shouts. "I need to get my family to another district where they won't be tracked, and we need to get out of here!"

"What the hell?" Ezra says. "What?"

Gale describes quickly how Mallory's men were looking for him, and how they shot two civilians before Haymitch, Katniss, and Gale killed them. "Where is my family?" There's a note of hysteria to his voice now.

"Rory's at the mines, the kids are at school. Don't know about your mom."

"I'll go get them to the train station," he says, already heading to the door. "Go to Haymitch's house," he says.

"Earl's dead," Ezra says shortly.

Gale just nods. "I wondered." Then he's running out into the snow.

Ezra and I run through the streets of the Seam to the Victor's Village. The roads are nothing but ice and the snow has begun to fall again. I slip on the ice and tumble head-first into a drift. Ezra grabs my hand and heaves me out. Ezra drops a notebook on the snow and curses. The pages are soaked, the ink no doubt blurred.

It takes twenty minutes to get to the woods on the edge of the Victor's Village. The trees here are sparse and only recently planted after the war, I'd say.

We knock on Haymitch's door. He cracks it open to look at us through a suspicious eye, before shutting it again.

"Really?" Ezra snaps. He kicks the door. "It's us! We're with Gale!"

"Hold on," Haymitch grunts from inside. The door swings open. "I had to unlock the chain." He stands in front of us with a rifle pressed against his shoulder, the barrel aimed to a spot over our shoulders. "Come in, quickly," he orders. We do. He shuts and locks the door behind us.

"I assume Gale told you what happened?"

"Yes."

"They know I was there, too, and Katniss," Haymitch says, his voice low. "It's not safe here, it's not safe anywhere in District 12 as far as we're concerned at the moment. There's an apartment building in town where I rent a few rooms for storage; Katniss and Peeta are already there."

It takes ten minutes to get there, the snow picking up around us. The apartment building is three floors. Haymitch goes to the second floor and unlocks a door. The door jams and Haymitch mutters under his breath before pushing it open. "Katniss and Peeta are across the hall," he says. "Gale will be here soon. I'd say Mallory, or whoever it is we're going up against, will be here in a few days, too. Whenever the snow melts, actually. So get comfortable, because you could be dying here."

"Encouraging," Ezra mutters.

It takes me a minute to wrap my brain around what Haymitch said. I wonder if Gale worries as much about the souls of the people he killed as I do. Gale killed people today, too. Haymitch did. Katniss did.

Haymitch shrugs. "We'll figure out the plan later, eh? I suppose Gale will have a war council when he gets back." For some reason Haymitch finds this very funny and begins to laugh. He opens the door again and heads into the hall.

Ezra looks past the curtains to the window, watching the windblown streets below piled with snow. He shakes his head. "Mallory won't come until the snow melts. I doubt he'll come at all."

I didn't really understand how snow melting would keep a criminal away, but I don't object because Ezra has been doing this for his entire life.

The weight of the day is almost too much. I close my eyes and fall asleep.

When I wake up it's dark. I can hear Gale and Ezra talking in the hallway. I want to hide or run or be anywhere, really, than here.

"Mom wasn't happy, but she left with the kids. They're going to District 2, Paylor's having some people take them in."

"Hm."

"What are we doing out here, Ezra?" Gale asks.

"Interesting question, since we're teamed up with a drunk and two emotionally damaged Victors now."

"Shut up," Gale's voice is hard.

"Sorry. I forgot."

"Stop it for once. Stop being a self-righteous prick for once and pretend to see things from an unfiltered lens."

"Fine, whatever."

"What's going on with you and Evangeline?" Gale asks.

"Nothing."

"Really? What was that earlier?"

"She was crying and shit, we just killed someone."

"You know you can't do that, Ezra."

"Kill people? Seems like it's my job, actually, or have you forgotten?"

"Don't get involved with her, Ezra. It's a bad idea."

"I'm not going to get involved with her. Jesus. She's my coworker. I'm not stupid."

"You realize you could get fired, right?"

"I don't need you telling me that," Ezra says, "because I already know."

I wonder if that means him kissing me was nothing, if everything was nothing.

Gale sighs. "I've gotta go call Mom, make sure they're doing okay. They'll be in 2 in a few days."

"This will probably be all sorted by then. But good luck. There's a payphone down the hall, calls can't be tracked. Just make sure it's not bugged."

Ezra comes in once Gale's footsteps head down the hall. By then I'm sitting up on Haymitch's old patchy couch. Ezra sighs when he sees me. "You heard that? If it's any consolation, I liked kissing you," he says flatly. "But if we'll die in a few days, or get fired-not to mention the fact that I'm married with two kids and another on the way, a kiss, or whatever else could happen, isn't worth it."

"I know," I say. Of course I know.

But for some reason I don't.

Gotta admit, this was like my worst chapter ever IMO. I'm going through a super apathetic phase where I'm just like "screw writing when I could watch SNL reruns or Jeremy Jahns on Youtube." But if you disagree that's awesome. Everything goes down the next few chapters.