Terry and Candy

"Chapter 10
Some light at the end of the tunnel"

- William! How could we forget?!

- Forget about what Roberta?

- About my best friend, your sister, my sister in law

- You mean Candy… Did we forget about her?

- No, we didn't but yes we did! we got married and were enjoying our expended honeymoon and we didn't call her since. We don't know what's happening to her, if she is alright… if the baby is fine

- You're right honey…

Roberta decided to help Candy as best as she could she went to the bank right after coming back from her honeymoon and transferred some money to Candy's account without giving her name, she knew that Candy would never accept their money if she knew.

In the meantime Candy was waiting for the answer to her comic book from the publishers, and Terry was trying to find himself a job in the little companies but with the CV he had no one wanted to hire him. He was overqualified for those little enterprises; mostly they were not even calling him back after receiving his CV. He was getting depressed but didn't say anything to Candy. He started to feel that he was good for nothing, for the first time in his life he was trying to work without his father's help and wasn't able to find a job.

Candy knew how her husband was feeling and was doing her best to make him feel that he was needed and loved by his wife. They were spending their time talking and dreaming about the baby. They learned that it was going to be a boy and Terry was jumping of joy, he always wanted to have a son. They were trying to find him a name. Candy insisted on Terrence Graham but Terry wasn't sure if he wanted his son to have the same name as him.

Their favorite pass time was reading their great grand parents diaries. They were reading them before falling asleep. It was unbelievable how their great grand parents were feeling what the other was going through living in different cities. They didn't need to see each other to know how they were feeling; it was like they were bonded. They didn't write in their diaries every day but whenever Candy was writing a page, Terry was writing a page too. It was always the same dates… It was like letters; sometimes they were answering their questions. So Terry was reading his great grandfather's part after listening to her wife reading her great grandmother's part... Reading these diaries was sometimes so painful that they couldn't keep the tears from falling. Candy started to read her great grand mother's page, it was written twenty five years after their break up…

" Today I have read something horrible in the newspapers. I'm still in the shock of it. Susanna… she passed away. It's so hard to explain my feelings now… She was so young to die, so beautiful, so full of love… She had kids, she had a family. Who will take care about her children now? I hope that Terry will find them a good mother… What am I saying? Who am I trying to fool?! Terry, how are you? It must be so hard, I wish I could be there for you… you know that I never stopped loving you, don't you? I'm really sorry for Susanna but I can't help thinking that if I waited enough a day would come and I could be your wife, that we freely could love each other. Does it make me a bad person Terry? I guess it does. Susanna just passed away, she was an angel, she was your wife, and you loved her don't you? and you see what I am thinking… and I'm a married woman. Albert… poor Albert… does he doubt about my secret feelings that I try to hide from him, that I make love to him imagining that it's you, Terry?! I look at my children and I can't help wondering how they would look like if you were their father … I thought that with time everything was going to be fine, that I would get over you, that I would learn to love Albert but I guess… the passion of love is not something that you can learn with time… you feel it or you don't . You were my soul mate and I lost you… and now you are a free man but I'm married.. to the kindest person in the world. I wish he was bad, I could leave him but how can you leave someone who loves you that much, someone who takes care of you all his life?"

Candy was crying reading those lines; fate wasn't good to her great grandmother… Her rival died and she was still saying nice words about her. She thought about Lacey and said to Terry

- You know if Lacey married you like Susanna did with your great grandfather, I would hate her and would be glad to learn that she died… I could never say those nice words about her

- I guess your great grandmother was feeling the same but she was trying to convince herself that their decision was right; she regrets so much marrying your great grand father… I really feel sad for her… I wonder how my great grandfather was feeling that day when his wife died.

- Me too… please can you read it.

- It's getting late Freckles, you need to sleep

- Please Terry, I need to know his feelings too…

- Ok…said Terry and opened his great grandfather's diary. Of course, he said, he wrote that day:

" Candy… Susanna died. My wife passed away, I'm a widowed and everybody come to tell me how sorry they are, they ask me if they could do something for me. I want to tell them "Bring me My Freckled Tarzan, bring her back" but instead I'm thanking them and grieving in silence but I'm relived… yes, I know that it makes me a bad person, I spent all those years with her, she was always a good wife and a good mother but I never could see her as something else but a burden… I hate myself for that, why, why I am not as strong as you are Candy? I don't know how I am going to raise the children all alone but I promise you I won't marry anyone else… I will wait for you Candy… God is my witness, there was only you in my heart and there will be only you until the day I die. Did you read the news from the newspapers? Do you know that my wife isn't in this world anymore? What do you think, do you regret marrying Albert? If you do, please don't. He's a good person and I want you to be happy. I hope that he makes you happy… If he doesn't!! I would find him and kill him Candy. He is so lucky to have you in his arms every nights… do you make love to him Candy? I never could make love to Susanna without thinking that it was you… could you make love to him? Will I ever be able to make love to you? Could Albert satisfy you as I could? I'm getting older Candy… I was supposed to be your husband! You were supposed to be my wife... the mother of my children…look all that I wrote, my wife died yesterday and look at my feelings! "

- It's so sad… said Candy, he was feeling exactly the same as my great grandmother, it's the greatest and saddest love story that I ever heard…

- Yes… it is… let's try to sleep now honey, it's not good for you that much emotion..

- You're right, good night, you know that I love you so much, don't you?

- I know… and I love you even more

The morning they woke up and Terry went to buy some bread for the breakfast, when he came back he found a letter addressed to Candy in the mailbox. He got excited thinking that it could come from the publishing company; he climbed the stairs in hurry.

- Candy, there is a letter for you!

- A letter for me? From who?

- Look at it.. he said giving her the letter

Candy's fingers were shaking, she couldn't open it and gave it to Terry
- Can you open it Terry? I'm too nervous

- Ok… let's open, said Terry and read the letter silently

- What does it say Terry?

- It says….

- What?

- That my wife is a very talented artist and that her comic book is going to be published!

- Oh, is it true!! Said Candy, give it to me!

She read it and Terry was right, her comic book was going to be published by one of the biggest publishing company of the country. She jumped to her husband's neck.

- Terry!! I made it! We made it!!

Terry was holding her tight

- Yes you made it my love! I'm so happy! We should celebrate it.

- Yes, we should, let's go to the French restaurant tonight

- Deal!

They had breakfast and talked about the comic book, about what future was going to bring. They could feel that everything was going to be better from now on. Their future plans were interrupted by the door bell. Terry went to open the door and he saw his brother in law with his wife.

- William! Roberta! Welcome! He said

- Hello Terry said William

- Hi Terry, where is Candy, said Roberta excited to see her friend

- I'm here, said Candy who just heard her brother's voice and came to the door to meet them

Roberta hugged her friend as tight as she could, it wasn't easy with their belly getting bigger each day. Then William took his sister in his arms:

- Little sister, I missed you so much, excuse me for not being here before and couldn't help you

- You were just married William… Oh I'm so happy to see you now

They all sat and talked; the women were talking about their pregnancy while the men were talking about the difficulties of being a pregnant woman's husband. Finally it was six pm when Terry realized that he was getting hungry

- Hey are we going to that French restaurant, he said to Candy

- French restaurant? Asked Roberta…

- Yes, said Candy, I forgot to tell you, my comic book is going to be published!

- No way!! Said Roberta, are you serious?

- Yes we just received the good news today

- Oh I'm so happy said Roberta hugging her friend

- Congratulations little sister, said William

- So are you joining us? Said Terry

- Of course we are, answered Roberta, we should celebrate

They went out, had dinner, it was something that Terry and Candy missed so much. It's been months since they didn't have dinner in a fancy restaurant. After the dinner William and Roberta left and Candy and Terry came back home, they were tired but happy.

- Terry, said Candy

- Yes my love

- Do you miss your old life?

- Yes and no… and you?

- I don't. It was good to be at that restaurant tonight but when I came home I felt that I'm happier here with you

- Really?

- Yes, I love you so much, and I could live anywhere as long as you are with me.

- I feel the same Freckles, I was rich, I thought I had everything that I needed and even more, I was going to get married but I didn't know what happiness was until I started to live with you in poverty. I wouldn't trade my life with you for anything! I still remember how I felt when I saw you in bed with Scott. There is nothing more important than you and now our baby in the world

- Can you read me some pages from your great grandfather's diary?

- Again? I thought we could have some fun tonight… if you know what I mean

- I see… well Mr Grandchester you have to read me some story before…

- Why you want me to read, you could read it yourself too

- I know but your voice… and the way you read his feelings is so good. You're so talented honey, you should become an actor!

- Well it must be in my genes, like being in love was in my genes too…

- Now are you going to read or not?

- I see… I won't have sex tonight if I don't read this diary… Ok let's start.. but promise me you won't be sad. Because whenever we read it, it makes you so sad and I don't want to see you crying…

- Ok, promise!

" Candy, are you alright? This morning I got up with such a bad feeling… I'm worried about you. I'm not able to think or work or do anything else. I know something bad happened. Freckles, are you alright?"

- Oh…I guess something bad happened to Candy, said Terry, maybe you should read your great grandmother's page

- Yes… said Candy and started to read, it was written the next day of Terry's page

" I'm so weak… I cried whole day. I don't know how to write it here… I lost my baby. I was going to have another child, Albert was so happy to learn that I was pregnant again, yesterday morning I could still feel the baby moving, I was calling him Terry, I was talking to him when I was feeling sad but he died… I lost him yesterday. The doctors said that I won't be able to have another child. Albert tried to look calm but I know how sad he was, he tried to console me but I saw in his eyes that he was about to cry. I never could love him as a husband and never could make him happy and he never could be open to me about his feelings… And he thinks that I cry only because I lost my baby… but I cry because I lost the hope to have a baby one day with Terry… I know it's a sin to think like that…I just can't explain to my heart who can't handle it anymore!"

- Oh my God… said Candy, she can't have a baby anymore… And your great grandfather knew that there was something wrong. They were created for each other but they never could be together and they suffered from it all their lives.

- Please Candy, you promised to me not to cry…

- I know Terry but I feel so sad… as if I was the one who wrote these lines… I want to keep reading more

- Can we just go to sleep, we can read the rest tomorrow…

- OK… hold me in your arms Terry.. as tight as you can, I want to be sure that you are here with me… that it's real

- It's real Candy… We are real…

The morning when Terry woke up he didn't find Candy beside him. He got up worried, as she was pregnant… He found her in the other room reading the old Candy's diary

- Freckles… he said, what are you doing?

- I couldn't help it, when I woke up, I wanted to read some more

- If it goes like this I will hide these diaries honey, they are upsetting you and it's not good in your condition

- Please Terry, try to understand, I have to know, I have to read… You know Albert is very sick

- Albert? Your father?

- No.. his grandfather… Candy wrote a lot about his illness a few years after she lost her baby…

- Really?... would you mind reading to me..

- Listen :

" Albert's health is getting worse every day… I can't believe that I didn't realize how sick he was. He always tried to give me comfort to help me, and I never realized that he could be sick, that he needed my help. I feel so bad… I never made him happy; he always kept inside of him all his feelings. I will do my best to help him to get better."

" Terry… I wish you were here to help me, Albert gets weaker every moment… I can't even know him, he changed so much and still he tries to hide from me that his health is getting worse everyday. I'm trying to act as everything was normal… the kids came to see him, they cry in their rooms at night. It's so hard to accept it or to pronounce it but I'm scared that the end is near for him."

" Today, he wanted to talk to me… Albert wanted to talk to me alone and I will never forget his words until I die… For the first time in my life I saw Albert as he was, for the first time of his life he shared his feelings with me… he told me that he knew how much I loved you Terry. That I would never be able to forget about you, that he tried and hoped first but he knew how powerless he was… He never could reach for me, I was never his wife … He said that all he wanted was to see me happy and when there was no hope between you and me, he wanted to marry me, to try to make me happy but he soon realized that I could never love anyone the way that I loved you… he said : now that I'm leaving this world Candy… I want you to be happy… no matter what happens please be happy…this is my last wish from you, I loved you more than you could imagine and you gave me a family, you made me always happy, you always tried to make feel wanted… thank you for everything you did. I was crying while he was talking to me and he said that I was prettier when I was smiling. And those were his last words… Oh Terry, Albert died… he just closed his eyes and didn't open them again… I'm crying… Terry… I need you so much..."

- Oh my God… Albert died… said Candy

- Yes… poor man said Terry. What happened after?

- I don't know this was the last page of the diary.

- Oh… we should read in my great grandfather's diary maybe he wrote something about Albert's dead, he must have learned about it from the papers…

The phone started to ring. Terry got up and answered. Candy was waiting for him, when he came back she asked who it was

- It was… he said

Seeing Terry's confused and surprised face Candy got worried

- Who was it Terry?

- It was someone from the theatre Company Stratford.

- What?

- Yes, they want to hire me as an actor

- As a what?! Said Candy surprised, she couldn't believe what her husband just said.