Chapter 9: Alias
LPOV:
We have been doing this for three weeks now, me and Embry. Every time I become more and more certain that I made the right decision inviting Embry to this mission of mine. We have found a routine. I meet up with him a little outside of La Push, on one of the back-roads never used, waiting in my car for him to show up. I've thought of several explanations if someone should catch us together, from me just giving him a lift, to that we actually are heading out together because after all we are friends. He often just pretends that he is grounded on the nights we protect the city. This is a good one since everybody remembers how Embry used to be grounded all the time. Now that he is in Jake's pack Embry doesn't do as much night-patrolling, and Ms Call has given up trying to get his son to stay home. Not that she doesn't care anymore, she has just changed tactics since the grounding didn't work, but this isn't anything that needs to be advertised to others, it's a valid reason for him to be unavailable, a reason that serves our purpose.
"We should have cool aliases and leave a business-card, maybe wear masks too." I joke as we scan one of the streets leading to the rougher parts of the docklands, the area we have decided to focus on tonight. The streets are mostly deserted, dead, but you never know. I walk a few steps ahead of Embry.
He chuckles: "What do you have in mind? Wolfprincess and Superwolf?"
To my infinite surprise I hear myself giggle. I never giggle. I try to compose myself. "More like Superwolf and Wolfboy, in case you don't want to be called Wolfprincess." I say looking back at him.
At the name of Wolfboy something I can't read flickers past his eyes, but it's gone before I see what it is.
"Jake used to call himself Wolfboy as a kid." he says looking at me.
I remember that! Jake was always telling the most ridiculous stories about Wolfboy. I have to remember to tease him about that. I, Rachel and Rebecca even joined them in playing Jake's wolfgame a couple of times, me being a princess and Jake the heroic Wolfboy coming to save me. Too bad I didn't need to be saved, instead me and the twins captured all of the boys, and tied them to a tree. I laugh out loud remembering this.
"Alright, you get to be Superwolf, I think I'm gonna call myself The Protector instead. Princess and me are two things that don't fit together." I laugh. I never was a princess, always was the tomboy. Princess-games were for girls like Emily, or the likes of Bella Swan for that matter.
He smiles back at me. "You could be called..." he stops mid-sentence, blushing furiously mumbling something incoherent.
I get curious. Embry often looks like he wants to say things but then shies away. He has always done that ever since he was a kid. He was always so quiet and then said the sweetest things when he finally opened his mouth.
"I could be called what?" I demand turning around walking backwards.
"It...it... it was nothing..." he seem to get uncomfortable.
"Embry!" I command "I want to hear it!"
"It was just...it was... just stupid...something I used to think of you when we were kids." he mutters.
Oh, now I'm really curious. I want to hear what he is going to say. I'm about to stop in my tracks and force him to say it, when a sickly smell hits me coming from a dark alley.
"Embry! Do you smell that?!"
"Leech!" he growls.
This is a new situation for us. Prior we've concentrated on all-human crimes, but I have been waiting for the next step in our crime-fighting. It's looking me in the face right now!
"Let's track it!" I decide.
The scent is fresh and strong. Just one bloodsucker. Good! Otherwise I would have hesitated in making the decision of following it, when we are still so new to this city-protecting, when there is only the two of us. I smell humans too, nearby. Not good! We have to hurry.
Like one mind we break into a run. All my senses are concentrated on this one sickly sweet smell, on listening, on feeling, on seeing.
Before the next turn I've already heard it, sensed it, tasted it in the air. I know what we will meet. Humans, two of them, maybe three, and a leech. The metallic smell of blood tells me we are late – too late! But one is still alive, one with a a frantic heartbeat, one who still gasps for air, one who is pleading or praying, I don't know which: "Please, please. God please!"
"Phase!" I order Embry, as I strip my summer dress off, never breaking my run. As soon as it is over my head I'm already a wolf flying through the air.
As one mind we see the scene laid out before us. A leech feeding on a human. For him it is too late, but there is another man. Still alive, still un-bleeding, still un-bit. This one we can save! His eyes widen even more at the sight of us, the fear in them intensifying, if that's even possible.
Before the leech has had time to react my teeth sink into his arm tearing, trying to pull him off balance, down so that Embry can access his neck better.
"Bite!" I think, or is it Embry thinking this? And then I feel how his teeth sink into the leeches neck, crunching, tearing the head off. "Kill!" We think in unison as we continue to rip, concentrating on this, on taking the danger out. But my thoughts, our thoughts, our senses are at the same time scanning, analyzing the surroundings. "Too late...", "One saved!", "Not fast enough...not good enough..." Our thoughts, our feelings intertwining, becoming one, impossible to distinguish mine from Embry's right now through the adrenaline rush, but my mind already knows which ones are mine and which are Embry's.
"Not much of a fight." I send my thought towards Embry, and I feel his relief. A muffled thought, but I still understand parts of it: "...not hurt!" A sensible thought, a thought coming from my sidekick who is relived we didn't get hurt. I feel relief too, but mostly failure. Failure... This is why I would have hoped for a harder fight, a fight that would have driven this feeling of failure out of my body by pushing it to its limits. There is a dead man lying on the street! We were too late for him! I wasn't good enough! I know this is the truth, but I keep my thoughts under control now that we inspect our work.
"We need to burn it!" I project.
To phase back in front of this man, although scared out of his mind isn't a good idea, isn't a safe idea! But we need to be human to burn the leech, and one of us has to take care of this chocked man. "Let's carry the body parts into that abandoned building" I project the image of a building we passed just some minutes before stumbling into this situation. "Then one of us runs back in human form to take care of him" I order.
I leave Embry to make sure the bloodsucker is burned properly and no traces are left of it and rush back to the alley fully clothed.
The man is still lying there, wide-eyed, clearly falling into chock. Teeth clattering, mumbling incoherently: "...blood...dead...wolves..." as his eyes fixate on the dead man, on the blood, on the horror of the scene.
"Sir!" I try to get his attention. "I'm here to help you. Look at me!" I try to get him to break his gaze from the body.
"Are you hurt?" I start to scan his body, making sure he isn't bit, although I already know he isn't, but I must make certain of the fact. There is nothing, and he doesn't seem to have any other physical injury either. He could have run, but then probably not. I've seen deer caught in the headlights, paralyzed with fear. That is what this man is – paralyzed with fear... I put my arms around him, trying to keep him warm before his body temperature drops too low, trying to comfort him, trying to tell him that he is alive.
Then Embry is back. Making a call with the cell-phone I've bought for these missions, the one that can't be traced to me or anybody connected with me. My own I have left in my car. "And the body?" I ask looking at Embry.
"They won't be able to tell, it doesn't expose us in any way and normal people don't believe in vampires, the police won't either." he says so quiet only someone with supernatural hearing can hear.
"We leave before they come. It's best this time, there is no explanation to why we are here at this hour. We leave when we hear them coming." I tell him. It is for the best. There is nothing more we can do here.
We wait until we hear the sound of police cars, still very far away. Then we start to leave. Somehow the man seems to snap out of his state a little. He looks at me, looks and looks. Just looks. "Angel. You are an angel" he finally says.
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We are sitting in my car parked on the small back road leading to the reservation where I usually drop Embry off. Somehow this dropping off has turned out to be some sort of a therapy session for me.
Embry turns to look at me, eyes soft. "That's what I was going to suggest for your alias."
"What?" I don't get it.
"Angel" he smiles now. "You could call yourself 'The angel'" he whispers looking at me.
I bark out a laugh. "Me?! An angel!? I'm nothing like an angel. You know that Embry! Don't say you thought I was like an angel when you were a kid?!" The failure I've felt, the disappointment at not being to save the other man slowly disappearing by this ridiculous thought of me being an angel.
"Do you ever feel... I just sometimes feel like I'm a little lost, adrift. I used to be so sure of who I was, but now I just sometimes really don't know anymore." I don't know what it is but I once again find myself opening up, talking with Embry in a way I haven't talked with anyone post-wolf. Somehow the way Embry listens makes me feel like I could tell him things I've not even really voiced for myself.
"Sometimes I feel like I've let everyone down...But this is who I am" I say gesturing towards myself "...and maybe it isn't that bad?" I ask. "I don't know Embry...I guess I'm just...Just forget it..." I mutter shrugging my shoulders.
Embry sits in silence for a while, pondering, staring out the window at the rain pouring down.
"Leah." he says lifting his eyes to mine. "You haven't let anyone down. Just make sure you don't let yourself down by thinking that who you are isn't enough, because it is more than enough Lee. Your demanding so much of yourself, too much. Why don't you cut yourself some slack?" he asks sounding determined, maybe even a little forceful.
"Who you are hasn't really changed Leah. I think you just have forgotten who you are. You have always kept trying. Even when it's been hard. I don't know anybody like you." he continues. There isn't anything resembling pity or judgment in his eyes. It feels sincere.
A smile is dancing on his face, his eyes tender."I... This is probably gonna sound lame...but as a kid..." he blushes, turning his gaze down to his hands. "Leah, I used to...I used to think...I... It ...It made my day when you talked to me. It made me feel like I was somebody, that I was special..." he stutters wringing his hands in a way I remember him doing as a kid. And then his hands still and his eyes are back to mine, as he whispers so softly I'm not sure I hear it at all: "It still does, Leah."
And for the first time in ages I don't do what I have been doing if someone says something nice to me. I don't lash out and I don't belittle Embry's words. Instead I believe them and then say two words I almost forgotten: "Thank you." And I mean them in a way I never meant those two words before in my life. Thank you Embry.
This is the first time I really see Embry Call I think. I always have just seen him as being there, a kind-hearted quiet soul, but now as I watch him it is like he is three things at once. The memory of a shy kid I always wanted to hug because he was so heartbreakingly adorable. The promise of a man: strong yet sensitive, caring and wise. Then this present quiet sweet blushing boy-man who says all these things that makes me feel good about myself, makes me fell confident, whole. If Embry's words are true about me, that I am too hard on myself, they sure go for Embry too. Because if I make him feel like he is somebody, his words makes me feel like I'm somebody special too.
"That was the best compliment I've ever got in my life. You make me remember how I used to feel about myself. You make me feel special too! Thank you Embry." I smile.
"I'll drop you off at your house." I tell him before I go all mushy on him.
"And if someone sees us coming together?" he asks quietly, smiling brightly. It feels wrong to send him out in the rain after this, even if it wouldn't take him too long to run home from here.
"It's pouring and it's 5.30 on a Sunday morning, so I doubt anybody will be up. Who will see us? Seth and the pups will sleep through an earthquake. Trust me, I've tried to wake them up, it's impossible." I laugh. "And if someone in Sam's pack sees us they probably think we've been patrolling on Cullen land and just gotten off our shift. Otherwise we just stick to the story of us going clubbing to Seattle together, there's nothing weird with that. We're friends."
He nods with the sweetest smile on his face.
I'm about to start the car when a rustle in the woods causes us both to tense up. Before we see anything the passenger door flies open with such force I'm sure it must have come off it's hinges. It's Jake! For some unknown reason he seems furious, his body shaking, rippling water.
He just stares at us, not saying a word, silently shaking, the shakes slowly dying out, but still tangible under the surface. He looks like he is about to implode. He stares and stares and stares. And I stare right back, too surprised, too tired to think of anything witty to say.
"What are you doing in Leah's car?" he finally opens his mouth as he glares at Embry.
"I..." Embry starts.
"We are talking. What does it look like to you Jake?" I sigh.
"You're sitting in a car in the middle of nowhere talking at the break of dawn!" His words a lethal growling. I almost expect Jake to bare his teeth. If I didn't know better I would've thought Jake and Embry were mortal enemies and not the best of friends.
"We're having secret meetings with vampires trying to plan a mutiny overthrowing you Oh-high-and-mighty-asshole" My voice dripping with sarcasm as I roll my eyes. "What the hell are you doing here yourself acting like you're on a fucking warpath?! Have you been taking drugs, I hear they fuck up your brain." I yell loosing my composure.
Jake ignores me, which pisses me off even more. "Why are you in Leah's car?!" he demands of Embry, breathing hard, nostrils widening. Raging bull is what comes to my mind, a bull waiting for the red cloth to be waved in front of his eyes, waiting for a reason to attack. Must be the Alpha-steroids...
"We were just talking. We've been to Seattle." Embry says calmly, looking Jake firmly in the eye. But I can see the hair on Embry's arms is standing straight up.
"Seattle." Jake says slowly pronouncing every syllable, voice dark and dangerously low.
Embry doesn't seem faced off. I'm surprised. He is the picture-boy of coolness right now. Ice to the fire in Jacob, to the fire I'm feeling. I'm shaking quite visibly now.
"Leah offered me to come with her. I've been lonely." Embry adds quietly.
Jake's eyes narrow, searching Embry's face, then mine.
"Fine. Sorry to interrupt your girl-talk." he snarls. "Embry, I need you to run patrol with me. Get out and phase!" He commands stalking away, not leaving any room for discussions.
"What the hell is so important so he has to patrol right now, your highness?" I shout after him starting to get out of the car myself, but then I feel Embry's hand on my arm.
"It's alright Leah" he softly says.
I cast a wary look at Embry. He just nods his head, not releasing my arm until I shut my door again and sit back in my seat.
"I enjoyed talking with you Leah, as always. Thank you." he whispers as he steps out and follows Jake.
I hear a faint shimmer telling me that both now are in wolf-form.
Fuck, I think as I gun the engine. "Fuck, fuck, fuck" I mutter. I just hope Embry is able to hold the story together, the one we rehearsed the first night we started, the one created for emergencies like this. A club, me offering Embry to come with me because he has nothing better to do, having a nice time, but nothing too special, drinking some, but not too much, music, blinking lights, people, talking about nothing special. I know Embry can pull it off, but I never pictured us being questioned as wolves. Somehow I know Jake will want every detail of our supposed night of clubbing. This quietly raging Jake is something that makes me feel unsure, angry, insecure. It's a Jacob I never encountered before. What the hell is his problem?
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AN: Sorry took me a while to write this...
Jake's POV coming up soon, probably next chapter or the one after that.