Marley wanted to kiss Ryder. So badly. She wanted to kiss him more than she had wanted anything before, and it broke her heart that she couldn't build up enough courage to just lean over and do it.
The whole night before, Marley had been sitting at the cliff face, holding hands with Ryder and thinking about kissing him. Just like the day before last. It was almost déjà vu.
I wish that the dream I had was real. The one where I had kissed Ryder. Marley ducked her head as she opened the doors to the school, sighing aloud. The thoughts of that dream were really getting her down. The dream was only two days ago and I am still thinking about it. It feels like it's been forever. It also feels like it's been forever since I met Ryder, but it's only been ten days.
Marley ran her hand through the side of her hair and watched as her wavy hair fell through her fingers. She sighed and stopped right in front of her locker, opposite to one of the school's science labs.
Pulling on her bag straps, she reached her hands out and turned the lock on her locker, spinning in her code. She tugged the lock down and the door bounced open. Marley pulled the door and rested it against the locker next to hers. She was unloading her bag off of her shoulders when she caught a white piece of paper folded on the bottom shelf of her locker.
Marley frowned and reached forward, grabbing onto the note. She unfolded it and read over the scribbled writing.
I think you're cute. –J x
Her eyes widened and she blinked, making sure she had read the note correctly. Had someone really just called her cute? And who was J?
She took a look up and down the hallway, the note still in her hands when she caught that brown-eyed boy from yesterday leaning against his locker a little bit further down the hall and smiling right at her.
Marley smiled back at him bashfully, facing her locker again and gasping to herself. He wrote the note. He's 'J'. Marley folded the note up again and slid the paper into one of her exercise books to find later.
He was calling her cute. The boy who had been staring at her all day yesterday was calling her cute, and he was smiling at her. It made her feel light-headed. He was so, so cute and Marley just wanted to talk to him. But why would anyone have a crush on her? Why would someone as cute as him like her? Why would anyone like her?
Why couldn't Ryder like her?
Marley shoved her bag into her locker, her hands still shaking as she thought again of the note. Her heart sped up in her chest.
She grabbed two of her exercise books from her locker and took her pencil case, slamming her locker shut and leaning forward to press her head against the cold metal door. What was going on in her life? None of it seemed to make any sense.
Plus there was Ryder. She couldn't stop thinking about him either.
Marley pulled her head back and stared down at her shaking hand, remembering what she and Ryder had done yesterday. They had held hands. She brought her hand up to her lips and ran her fingers over them, remembering that she had also kissed his cheek, more than once.
She liked Ryder more than that boy obviously… but that boy seemed to actually like her back. Ryder would never, ever like her more than a friend. It was obvious.
If only there was some way she could find out if Ryder would ever like her back, and if he didn't, she could just try her hardest to forget her feelings for him and then she could give the other boy a chance.
Marley sighed angrily at herself and shook her head. There was no way in hell she could ever stop liking Ryder. Not even if he didn't like her back. She was crazy for him. For those eyes.
And he was such a sweet person. He didn't deserve all of the pain he was put through on a daily basis from those terrible bullies at school.
With one last loud sigh, Marley turned away from her locker and walked down the hallway, her books cradled close to her chest. She needed to do something about her and Ryder's relationship because she couldn't just sit there with all of her feelings for him hidden deep inside of her. He had to know how she felt… and then maybe he would feel the same about her. She heavily doubted it, but she just had to hope that he would feel the same.
And there was only one way she knew how to get it out of him.
{x}
She kissed my cheek. Marley kissed my cheek. She leaned over and she kissed my cheek and she held my hand. Marley Rose kissed my cheek.
Ryder brought his hand up to his cheek, remembering the way that Marley's lips felt against his cheek. They were so soft and he just wished they could have stayed there a little longer.
It shocked him that she had kissed his cheek, though. Why would she even want to kiss his cheek anyway? She couldn't have liked him back… could she?
Ryder sighed and ran his hand over his face, rubbing his eye lightly. It stung as he touched it, but shrugged the pain off. It wasn't as bad as it normally was. He was feeling pretty lucky that all he had gotten that morning was a punch in the eye and a kick in the legs. He could barely feel the pain in the leg, and the pain in his eye was barely anything. It was good because he could think about things other than the constant pain.
A door to the bathroom opened and Ryder brought his legs up onto the toilet seat. He normally sat in the boys bathroom at lunch to stay away from the bullies in the lunch room, even though it stunk so badly all of the time and all that was written on the walls were insults and swear words. He wouldn't admit it, but the words really got to him – they probably even were directed to him.
There were some whispers happening around the bathroom and occasional laughing, but beside that it remained fairly quiet. Ryder pulled his legs closer to him and pushed his head in between his knees, trying not to make a single sound. He didn't want to get caught in there by anyone.
He let out a few quiet, shaky breaths and finally lifted his head out, staring at the light above his cubicle, watching it flicker. He was nervous that those people in the bathroom with him would find him in his hiding place and give him away. Or even worse, they could beat him themselves.
There were a few more mutters and chuckles before there were footsteps and the bathroom door opened and closed again. And then they were gone.
Finally, Ryder thought. He let out a loud grunt and put his suddenly sore legs back down, wiping his sweaty hands on the tops of his jeans. They were gone finally, and he could relax.
But he suddenly felt his blood run cold when the footsteps came back and the talking got louder. He even recognized the voices as those stupid footballer players who shouted at him every single morning. "No, no, no." Ryder whimpered quietly, digging his finger nails into his legs as the voices grew closer and closer.
The door slammed open and hit the cubicle wall beside him with a loud bang. Ryder squeezed his eyes shut. He didn't want to even look at the people in front of him. He knew what they were going to look like, and it scared the shit out of him. He could already feel his hands beginning to shake.
"Look who we found," Ryder heard one of the boys in front of him speaking now, the rest of the group quiet. "We found the fag."
A hand suddenly grabbed the side of his jumper and tugged him to his feet, almost dangling him off of the ground. Ryder's breath hitched and he opened his left eye slightly, catching the sight of the ring leader of the group. The blonde guy. The boy smiled before swinging Ryder to the side, causing his face to collide with the door of the cubicle. Ryder swore he heard a crack, and that's when he felt his nose begin to bleed.
Ryder was about to bring his hand up to his dripping nose before he was shoved back. He fell against the toilet, his head hitting the wall right next to the flush button. He grunted again and brought his hand up to rub the back of his head, where he was obviously going to get a bump soon. He knew he was probably going to get a bruise on his nose again, especially since it definitely was bleeding. He could taste the blood on his lips.
"Loser." One of the others gathered before him said, coming forward and grabbing Ryder by the scruff of the neck, slamming his head against the wall on the right. Ryder grunted as his head began to throb.
The same jock pulled him forward and shoved him towards the ground. The group moved and let him fall right onto the tiled ground, hitting his nose against the tiled floor and hearing another crack come from his face. He tasted more blood and Ryder forced himself to spit the blood back out.
Ryder started to sit up before one of the footballers stepped on his back and forced him back to the floor. He grunted and used his hands to hold himself up so he didn't hit the floor again.
A sharp kick hit him in the kidney and Ryder let out a gasp as he rolled over slightly, staring at the feet that surrounded him. Ryder let out a deep, pained sigh as everyone began whispering around him. He could feel the kicks coming any second.
They started almost as quickly as the thoughts ran through his head. They were all kicking him at the same time, like they all just needed to get their hits in.
As Ryder brought his hands up to shield his face, he felt a blunt stabbing to the side of his head where someone had just kicked him. Tears began to brim in Ryder's eyes, and he tried as hard as he could not to let them fall.
He was just sick of all of the pain he was put through in his life. The emotional pain and the physical pain were just far too much for him to handle.
The only thing making his life worthwhile was Marley, and even then she didn't like him back the way he liked her.
If only he could find out if she liked him back or not… but how?
As he got pulled to his feet by his collar, Ryder saw his appearance in the mirror and looked down at the ground to avoid staring at his bloody and ugly face.
He was worthless. He was stupid. There was no point in living any more. There was no way that Marley would like someone as ugly as him. Even in his dreams she wouldn't like him the same way.
He got flung into the sinks in front of the mirrors, and he hit his head against the metal. He deserved all of this shit he was being put through. Ryder knew he deserved every single punch, kick and insult thrown in his direction.
Ryder felt so worthless, and there was no changing that.
{x}
Her hands were shaking again as she stood on the steps of her house, looking out onto the street and watching the cars pass by slowly. She held her phone in her hand and her earphones in the other and was swinging the earphones around her finger.
I'm really going to do this, aren't I? I'm really actually thinking of doing this. What if things go wrong? What if he doesn't appear at the cliff this afternoon?
So many 'what ifs' where running through her brain and she couldn't think straight any more. It was a stupid idea, wasn't it?
Marley sighed and ran her hand through her hair, sending the hair that had previously been in front of her face and in her mouth behind her head again.
She picked up the ear phones and slid them into her ears, walking down the steps of her house and down the path out the front, turning on her music to calm herself. She really just needed to stop being so nervous about this.
Better in Stereo by Dove Cameron began playing and Marley shook her head at the cheesy song, changing it to the next song along. The Lost Get Found started playing and Marley grinned to herself.
Ryder was lost, and she was going to help him get found again. She was going to make sure his fire didn't burn out, that his lights didn't go down. Ryder needed a reason to believe again, and she was going to be his reason.
At least, she hoped she could be his reason.
"There's a girl on the streets, she's cryin', there's a man whose faith is dying. Love is calling you." Marley felt her smile grow bigger as she walked – love was calling her to do the right thing and make Ryder feel loved. He obviously had no love in his life, and she was going to be the person to give him that feeling of love. To give him faith that things would get better at school.
By the time the song had finished, Marley had made it to cliff face. She was excited to see Ryder again, but also excited to be the shoulder to lean on.
She pulled the earphones from her ears and walked up the hill, spotting Ryder in the same position he was in everyday – cross legged, about 30 centimetres from the edge, the sun glaring into his eyes.
"Ready or not, Marley Rose, you have got to do this." Marley whispered, cracking her knuckles and pressing forward, being careful not to make too much noise but also not to be silent enough to frighten Ryder.
"Hey." She whispered as she neared closer, falling down as gracefully as possible next to him. She turned her head to meet his eyes and was about to ask him how his day was, if the bullies had got to him again, when she noticed the blood dripping from his nose and running down his face. She gasped. "Ryder, what-what happened?"
Marley reached her hand out and cupped her hand around Ryder's bruised cheek. The blood had partly dried up, but it still looked like it was dripping slowly. "It's nothing, Marley." Ryder replied bitterly, turning his face away and angrily tugging Marley's hand off his cheek, although he loved the feeling of her skin against his.
"Ryder…" Marley sighed and rubbed the back of her sleeve over her face. She didn't know what to say next. How could she insist on getting it out of him?
Plus she was as nervous as hell about her plan for later.
"A nosebleed this… bad isn't nothing." She murmured, cringing as she watched the blood drip again. Marley looked up to Ryder's brown eyes and caught tears shining in them. She was tempted to cry herself at seeing how much pain he was going through.
"Marley, just lay off, okay? I'm fine." Ryder snapped, tilting his head like he was going to look at her before moving his head back so he could stare at the barely moving sun in front of his eyes. "I don't need your… sympathy."
Marley took her hand back and linked it with the other, sitting silently next to Ryder. He was breathing deeply and loudly, and Marley tried to lull herself with the slow pattern. She needed to do something for him if she was going to be the shoulder to lean on. She needed to help him somehow now.
Marley caught sight of her rolled up jumper sleeve and saw the tissue poking out. She pulled out the crumpled up tissue and spread it out, shuffling closer to Ryder and resting her knee against Ryder's. "Marley, I said-"
"I know what you said, but I don't care." Marley interrupted, reaching her hand up again and as lightly as she could, taking his face in her hand and turning it towards her. Ryder sighed and closed his eyes, bowing his head slightly.
Marley let out a breath through her nose and picked up the tissue, dabbing lightly above Ryder's top lip. She pulled the tissue away and realized it was absolutely covered in blood already. Marley shook her head and gave Ryder a sad look, hoping that he didn't open his eyes and see her giving him this pitying look.
Do it now, the little voice inside of Marley's head screamed. Do it now before it's too late. Do it while you're not screaming at yourself not to. He needs this hope, Marley, and you're the only thing that will ever, ever give him hope.
Letting out a shaky breath, Marley brought the blood covered tissues to Ryder's lips and wiped up the almost dry blood across his also bleeding lip. He was injured there, too. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea…
Ryder opened his eyes and looked at Marley, watching her staring at him. At his lips. Ryder watched her blue eyes begin to water only slightly, before she gazed up to meet his eyes. "Marley-" Ryder began, shaking his head, the tissue brushing against the cut on his lip.
"Ryder, I-" Marley stopped herself. She couldn't say this; she couldn't tell Ryder she liked him. He wouldn't like her back, anyway. What really was the point? What was I thinking? Why did I even think this was a good idea? Why would he even- oh, fuck it.
She didn't even take another breath before leaning forward, her nose hitting Ryder's cheek and their lips colliding. She needed to do this, even if he didn't like her back. Marley needed to kiss him.
Ryder's eyes widened as he felt Marley pressing her lips against his, and he could feel his heart just pounding against his rib cage. He could hear it in his head. This wasn't happening… was it? Was Marley actually kissing him on the lips?
She couldn't have been. Marley didn't like him.
But she was. She was sitting right up beside him, kissing him full on the lips. Ryder closed his eyes and reached his bruised hand forward, grabbing Marley on the waist.
Marley's hand was still resting on his cheek and she ran her fingers back, dropping the tissue and pressing the tips of her fingers through his greasy hair.
She pulled back for half of second to take a breath before leaning forward again, not daring to open her eyes. She could feel Ryder kissing her back, but she still feared he was staring at her like she was crazy.
Ryder could feel her lips moving against his, and it brought shivers down his spine and goosebumps all over his arms. He had never been kissed before, and having Marley be his first kiss was a dream come true. To have a first kiss at all was a dream come true.
Marley's other hand snaked up and pressed against Ryder's shoulder, catching Ryder off guard and making him fall backwards. Marley followed him, not letting her lips get detached from his. She loved the feeling of his lips against hers too much to pull away.
After pressing down on Ryder for a couple more seconds, Marley finally pulled away and swallowed the newly grown lump in her throat. Her heart was pounding in her head, and her hands were shaking as she tangled them in Ryder's hair.
Marley looked up at Ryder's barely open eyes and smiled. They looked so… bright and happy compared to before.
Ryder was watching Marley's bright blue eyes as he opened his own. He licked his lips and tasted Marley's coconut lip balm, and a smile grew on his face. She just kissed him. Marley Rose just kissed him on the lips.
Catching Ryder's smile, Marley's smile grew and she pulled her shaking hand out from behind Ryder's head, brushing the hair from his eyes. "Ryder… I-I really like you." Marley said quietly, feeling her stomach fill with butterflies as the words left her mouth. Was this really the right thing to do?
His eyes widened and Ryder watched her with a careful eye. She wasn't joking about this. She couldn't have been joking about this. Ryder didn't even think before speaking, too in shock and too happy to care. "I like you, too, Marley. A lot."
Marley's bright and happy blue eyes widened with her smile. Ryder was dazzled by her white teeth and her shining eyes. She leaned down, gave his dry lips another kiss before pulling away, her face only millimeters away from his. And as she spoke, he could feel her lips brushing against his. "Ryder, will you be my boyfriend?"
{x}
...I don't exactly know what to write. I'm so excited - did you like this chapter? I've been wanting to write this chapter literally forever because you know, I like my romance and I especially love Ryder and Marley. Seriously though, did you like this? I'm so excited to read your reactions!
This chapter was originally going to be up earlier but I kind of got obsessed with a new TV show called Chuck and I procrastinated a lot, but it's here now!
I really, really hope you all enjoyed this chapter and thank you all for reading, reviewing and favouriting/following. You guys are incredible, and I need to thank you all so much.
TeaandGlee ~ I'm glad you thought the last chapter was adorable :) It totally made my day to read your review! The stalker boy won't get in the middle of Ryder and Marley now, will he? :) They did exactly what you're wanted in this chapter (ah, I'm so excited for your reaction!) I told you it would happen soon, though! Thank you so much, your reviews make my day! I love you, and thank you again for reviewing and reading xx
Guest 1 ~ Aw, thank you! Thanks for reviewing too, I'm glad you enjoyed the last chapter and I hope you enjoy this one just as much!
Guest 2 ~ Thank you! You made my day by reviewing! The boy can't get in the way of Marley and Ryder now, can he? (He still technically could but oh well). I guess I can't say it isn't so just yet ;) Thank you for reviewing, and I really, really hope you enjoyed this chapter! xx
Thank you all again for reading and doing all of that jazz. You guys are so totally awesome. Again, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and please review, it means the world to me!
-Camryn xx