Jasper's POV
I had spent the whole night trying to come up with something, anything, that could help Bella. Something that would give her an extra push towards getting better. Something simple. I was drawing a blank. I knew there must be something obvious I was missing but I had no idea.
"Rose?" I called out. She had been through a traumatic experience before, as had Esme, so surely she'd know something I could do.
"Yes," Rose entered my room.
I stood up from my desk and made my way over to her.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure," she replied her curiosity spiking.
"I've been trying to come up with something that I can do for Bella, but I can't think of anything. I was wondering if you would help me. If you had any ideas of things that I could do."
"Well," she began, "I know you like to come up with these things on your own so let me just tell you something and you can do what you want with it, okay?"
"Sure," hopefully I could figure something out from what she was going to tell me.
"As you know after I was attacked I was changed straightaway. When I realized everything I sought revenge. It was a temporary reprieve from everything I was feeling. Killing them all did nothing. It wasn't a cure all." She paused. "It took a long time. I didn't feel as though I could talk to anyone until Emmett came along. He was my rock. I was able to tell him things, express my feelings and thoughts. Having that safe outlet allowed me to finally begin to slowly let go of everything, and in turn, it allowed me to finally begin to heal."
"So, Bella needs someone to talk to?" I tried to clarify.
"Not necessarily, Bella needs something that will help her express her thoughts and feelings."
An idea was already forming. "Thanks Rose, I think I have it."
"Anytime Jasper," she left my room and I immediately went over to my bookshelves.
I grabbed out a blank, a4 sized, journal. I used journals as a way to put my thoughts into words. It helped me deal with a lot of things I had trouble with. I couldn't believe I didn't think of it, thankfully Rose's speech reminded me. I'd give Bella this blank journal. She could write or even draw in it, whatever she pleased, and hopefully she'd be able to use it to help her heal. For her to finally get things out of her head and onto paper, without having to talk to someone, would be a good thing.
I grabbed a pencil and turned to the first page. I wrote 'Bella Swan' as neatly as I could on the page and shaded it in. I added a few lines interconnecting, going around the bottom right hand corner and shaded them in as well. It looked good. I wanted her to know that it was hers and no one else's. I wrote neatly under the graphic on the corner, J.R. Whitlock. I didn't know if she had seen my name on the mural on her wall. It wasn't that big but she did spend a lot of time looking at it. Either way I wanted her to know that this was from the same person, me.
I gathered some pencils, all different lead sizes, in case she wanted to sketch. I also grabbed two of my expensive pens, one black and one blue, in case she wished to write. Now I just needed something to hold the pens together with. A ribbon perhaps. "Esme?" I called out.
"Yes," she responded from the living room where I could hear Emmett playing the Xbox.
"Do you have any ribbon?" I was sure she did. Esme was a compulsive hoarder. She hoarded crap we never needed. No one brought it up though because she always became so defensive. Carlisle lost a finger once for two months as a result of this.
"Yes. What color? What size?" Oh geez.
"I don't know, are they in a box? Bring the box up here," I was suddenly thankful Esme was a hoarder, where else would I get ribbon from at five am.
She was in my room a minute later, box in hand. "What's this for?" She asked as she approached my desk and sat the box down.
"Bella," I replied. "I'm giving her this journal and some pens and pencils. I need the ribbon to keep the pencils together."
"May I have a look," I handed her the journal. She ran her fingers over the well-worn brown leather. I think I got it in London. I bought a bunch of them ages ago knowing that I'd use them eventually. She flipped to the front page and her fingers flittered over my writing. "It's perfect," she muttered. I smiled. I was glad Esme approved. "Now as for the ribbon, how about we layer navy blue with gold?"
"Sure," I replied. I had no idea.
"Do you want to tie it?" Esme asked. God, I'd probably screw it up. I wasn't good with fiddly things.
"You do it," I handed her the pens and pencils and looked on amazed as she tied a fancy looking bow. It looked perfect. "Thanks Esme." I took the bundle off her carefully, trying not to ruin the bow, and sat them on top of the journal.
"No problem Jasper," she headed for the door but turned back last minute, "I used to write in a journal by the way, it helped me a lot." She smiled at me, pride coming from her. I smiled back and sent her my love and gratitude. "I love you too," she responded and left me be.
I looked at the journal on my desk. I really hoped Bella would like it, and furthermore that she would make good use of it. Now I just had to wait for school to come around. I figured that it would be easier, and hopefully slightly less creepy, if I put the journal in Bella's locker instead of her room. No need to let her think that I constantly invaded her personal space. I sat down at my desk and grabbed a book.
The two hours flew by. I grabbed Bella's journal and pencils, and made my way down the stairs. I was early but it would be easier to break into Bella's locker if there was no one around. I reached the living room. Emmett was still playing video games. Esme was knitting in the chair to the side of him. Rose was, out. I couldn't sense her in the house anymore. And Alice was in her closet, reorganizing her clothes it seemed.
"Anyone want to give me a lift to school?" I asked and was met with a chorus of no's. Great, just great. Stupid driving ban.
"I'll take you Jasper," Esme spoke. Excitement and longing coming from her.
"Great, getting driven to school by my mom, how lame," I smiled at her to let her know I was only joking. "Okay, let's go." Seriously though, I couldn't wait for these three months to pass.
The drive to school was pleasant. I was just sitting back reveling in Esme's calm and loving emotional makeup. It was refreshing. We didn't talk, we didn't need to. She pulled up to the school.
"Do you want me to wait for you?" She asked me, "It's early."
"No, that's okay," the time would pass quick enough, "Thanks for the ride though."
"Anytime Jasper," I got out of the car and waved her off.
I made my way into the school. Bella's locker. I'd have to find it. I entered the corridor that housed all the lockers and I took a deep breath. Attempting to pick up her scent. I finally got a taste of it and I followed it until I was standing in front of a locker which smelled entirely of Bella. I spun the lock and waited for it to click, 23-9-18, thank you vampire hearing. The lock clicked open and I opened the door. I was immediately met with Bella's scent. It was nice. Not overpowering. Not so mouthwatering that I wanted to kill her. No. She just smelt good.
I saw the reason for the smell, she had left her jacket in there. I moved her jacket to the left slightly and sat the journal, with the pens- bow still tied neatly, right on top. If she used her locker, which it seemed as though she did, then she would see it clearly. I made sure it was sitting safely before I shut the locker door, re-locking the lock. Bella would never know, except for the fact that I left something in there. I made my way straight to my first class and slid down next to the door. Now I just had to wait for school to start.
School was now completely underway. Boring, as ever. The bell to lunch rang and I made it all but two steps out of the classroom door before I was cornered by Jessica and Lauren, their lust ever present.
"Jasper," Lauren tried to purr my name, she failed.
"Yes," I replied trying to find my escape route.
"So, you're single now?" Lauren.
"So it seems," I felt a little confusion from her but she pushed it away.
"Are you dating yet? Or is it too soon?"
"I'd say it's too soon," hopefully this would deter her, or not. "Alice and I just broke up yesterday," I explained, "We had been together for two years, you just don't forget that."
"We don't have to date, we can just hookup," Lauren.
"No, thank you," surely I could just leave right? It's not like they'd suspect I was a vampire, just a jerk.
"Why do you keep on wearing that sweatshirt?" Jessica asked me confused.
"Because I like green," I was starting to wonder if any of the humans had noticed my lack of change in clothes, clearly Jessica had.
"Hmm," came her indignant reply.
"So, Jasper," Lauren said as she placed her hand on my chest and ran it down slowly. Oh hell no.
"Look at that," I interrupted her as I pointed behind them. I didn't wait, as soon as they turned around I ran and took refuge behind the first open locker door I could.
I leant back against the lockers praying that they couldn't see me. How could I let myself get cornered like that? Stupid human lust filled girls. Stupid Emmett. The locker I was hiding behind moved their door slightly. I hoped like hell Jessica and Lauren weren't still looking for me. I was pleasantly surprised when Bella's face came into view and she looked at me. I relaxed instantly. We were literally two feet from each other, not speaking, just staring.
"Sorry about that," I spoke. "They came out of nowhere, claws out. I hope you don't mind me hiding behind your locker."
She smiled at me, or simply at my predicament. I sure was getting myself into stupid situations these days. But that didn't matter, she was in front of me, Bella was, smiling at me. I couldn't even explain how happy I was. I was probably smiling like a fool back at her, she didn't seem to care. I was surprised by how much her face changed, how much her face lit up just because she was smiling. She was beautiful. And then she spoke. It was raspy and nearly inaudible but I heard it, one simple word, "No," and it gave me hope.
Her smile dropped, but I didn't care.
"Are they gone?" I asked her hoping that she would answer.
Her head disappeared behind her locker for a moment before reappearing. "Yes," came her shaky one word reply.
I smiled widely at her. "Thank you," I told her before rushing off.
No need to stay and make things more uncomfortable. No. I was happy with this progress. Whether she felt the need to talk to me just so she didn't come across as an emotionally damaged idiot, I didn't care. It was a step in the right direction and I was so happy.
"What are you smiling at idiot?" Emmett asked me as I sat down at the lunch table.
"Oh, nothing," even Emmett wouldn't be able to kill my happy mood now.
Lunch was uneventful. I hadn't pretended to eat lunch all week. I was using my Edward free time wisely. The others still had their trays of food and were pushing their food around. I was so glad I didn't have to pretend, but today was my last day. It was Friday and Edward would be returning home tonight. Edward. Hopefully everything would go off without a hitch and I could keep him away from Bella.
Bella. I glanced up at her. She was pushing her food around just like the rest of my family. Angela was talking to her like usual. I was about to look away when Bella looked up and met my eyes. I just stared at her, I didn't know what I was supposed to do. She wasn't doing anything, just staring. I tested her emotions. She was confused again, why did I confused her?
"Jazzie has a girlfriend," Emmett, damn him.
I reluctantly tore my gaze from Bella, "Shut up," I replied.
"Did you see that," Emmett gushed, "They were making gooey eyes at each other, how sweet."
"Emmett," I warned just as my phone rang, unlisted. "You're lucky Emmett." I stood, answered my phone, and made my way outside. "Jasper Whitlock."
"Jasper, it's Charlie," he seemed worried.
"Charlie? How'd you get this number?" I asked him confused.
"Well I do have resources as a police officer, but I called your father at the hospital and he gave it to me. I hope you don't mind."
"No, it's okay." He still seemed worried and possibly anxious. I didn't know his emotional makeup well enough to get a read on him from this far away. "What can I do for you?"
"I need to talk to you. Can you come by the station after school," I paused. What did he have to talk to me about? What had him so worried? "It's about Bella," he added when I took too long to respond.
"Sure Charlie, I'll be there." I hung up the phone before we attempted the awkward goodbye.
So, he wanted to talk to me about Bella. What about Bella? She seemed to be doing good today. Great in fact. She smiled, and she even talked, to me. I remembered back. Voice of an angel. Oh god, I was turning into a sap. Maybe the Major needed to break free soon, put me back in my place. No. I stopped that thought immediately. Thankfully the bell rang and I went off to the second last class of the day.
School finished in a blur. I tried desperately not to think about why Charlie wanted to talk to me, or what it was going to be about. I'd be there soon enough. The bell rang and I left the school straightaway. I ran to the forest and took a shortcut to the station through the trees. I was anxious to see what Charlie wanted. I came out of the trees, behind the station, and I walked around the front slowly. I made my way inside and went straight over to Charlie's desk. I sat down without him even noticing I was there.
"You're here quick," whoops, I didn't think of the time.
"Yeah, my sister drove me," I didn't like lying to him, but somehow I didn't think he'd believe me if I told him that I ran.
I took notice of his emotions, yes, he was definitely feeling worried. I was so tempted to ask what was wrong, but I held my tongue.
"How was school?" Ah, classic deflection there Charlie. I'd play along for a little while.
"Fine. I'm learning lots," another lie.
"And Bella?" Right I was supposed to be looking out for her, which I had been.
"Good. Angela Weber sits with her at lunch. I have no classes with her but from what I can see everyone else leaves her alone."
"Angela?" Charlie questioned out loud.
I couldn't take it anymore, I needed to move this along, "Is that what you wanted to ask me?"
"What?" Charlie snapped out of his thoughts, "No. I need to ask you a favor of sorts, well not really a favor," I sent Charlie a small dose of calm and clarity. "I've been keeping a close eye on Bella since I got her back three weeks ago and something is wrong. I don't know what to do. I don't mean to put this all on you Jasper, but I have no one else to ask. And I thought that maybe you'd have some insight on the matter."
"Okay," I accepted, "Explain the situation to me Charlie."
"Bella hardly eats and I can't work out why. Sometimes I think, and I know this will sound crazy, but sometimes I think she's eating when I'm not home. Meat goes missing from the freezer and she must clean up after herself as there's never any dishes or mess. I wouldn't have even known except I started keeping track the past week and it's definitely going missing. Fish, steaks, basically any meat. I know it mightn't be a big deal, but she doesn't seem to eat much at all and I can't work out why she would eat behind my back, it just makes no sense. I just wish I knew what was going on so that I could help her."
"Charlie," I said as I placed my hand on his forearm and sent him some calm, he appeared to be on the edge of a breakdown. "Leave it with me, okay, I'll think about it and see what I can come up with. Try not to worry about it, okay, let me worry about it for you."
"I can't do that Jasper, I can't put it all on you."
"Yes, you can," I told him sternly, "Leave it with me for the weekend and I'll have an answer for you on Monday. I'm good at working things out, just trust me, okay?"
"I do trust you," I could feel that he did, "I don't know why, but I do."
"Good, I'll get back to you," I stood up. "And Charlie?"
"Yeah."
"Take the weekend off, spend it with Bella. She seemed to enjoy your trip to Seattle, try and do something she might like."
"Okay, kid," he said gruffly, "Get out of here. Oh and Jasper."
"Yeah."
"I don't know if you need any incentive to help me, but there is such a thing as good behavior," he smiled at me.
Was that Charlie's way of telling me that if I came through with something useful then he'd give me my license back, oh I hoped so.
"I'll keep that in mind," I left the station and walked around the back to the forest. As soon as I hit the trees, I ran.
Bella's diet. There was one obvious way to find the answer to this, I needed to find out what she ate for the past two years, and for that to happen I had to make a trip to Phoenix. I needed to find out where she was kept. Research as much as I could on her kidnapper. Try and find out as much as I could about what Bella had been through the past two years. Charlie's answers should lie in what I'd hopefully be able to uncover.
"Road trip," I announced as soon as I stepped in the door of the house. "Who's coming?"
"Me," Emmett exclaimed from in front of the TV.
"Where are we going?" Rose asked.
"Phoenix. We're going to dig up some more information on Bella, find out where she was held hostage, all that."
"I'm in," Rose. I smiled at her.
"I want to help Bella too," Esme.
"If Esme goes, I go," Carlisle.
"Edward's coming home tonight," Alice reminded everyone as she came down the stairs. "We can't all go."
It would be so funny if Edward came home to an empty house after his time away, but even I'd admit that was a bit cruel. He'd probably think we were all dead or something dramatic like that.
"I guess we're staying then," Esme said sadly.
"Alice are you coming?" I asked her and she closed her eyes. Damn visions. I grabbed her by the arms and she opened her eyes. "Alice no visions," I said seriously, "Answer me this, do you want to come with us?"
"Yes," she answered weakly, "But-"
"No buts, you want to come, so you're coming. Screw the future, nothing bad will happen."
She paused. "Okay, I'll do it."
She still wasn't convinced but I could tell she was willing to try.
"I'm not saying you can't look into the future, but you want to come so you're coming with us."
"Okay," good, she was excited now.
"Now everyone go pack, I want to leave as soon as possible as we're driving. Make sure you pack enough for the weekend just in case."
"How long do I have?" Alice asked me frantically.
"Calm down," I sent her some calm, "Just go pack."
I was midway through packing when Emmett spoke, "Hey, you only asked us to come because you're banned from driving," I let out a small laugh, he had me there.
"Maybe," I replied, "But I am allowing you all to come and not just taking Rose with me, so count yourself lucky."
We we're all packed and waiting in the foyer. Alice took the longest but not that long. She did have three suitcases though, crazy. We were saying our goodbyes to Carlisle and Esme.
"Be safe," Esme pulled us all into a hug.
"Call us if you need anything at all," Carlisle. He hugged the girls, Emmett and I got handshakes.
"Make sure you look after Edward," Alice was concerned.
"Just tell him we're on a hunting trip," I told them, "I'll have to explain some things to him when we get back."
We all headed out to Carlisle's Mercedes as it was heavily tinted and should keep us protected from the sun in Phoenix. Both Carlisle and Esme were feeling sad, understandable. Esme had a bit of envy too, I understood that she wanted to come with us to be able to help Bella in her recovery more actively.
"We'll be back," I told them as we all got in the car. Emmett and I in the front, Rose and Alice in the back. "Carlisle," I said as I rolled down my window, "You have the weekend to work everything out, I hope to see that you've decided when I get back."
He nodded at me, but everyone was giving off confusion. It didn't matter though, both Carlisle and I knew that we were talking about his emotional shift since Edward had left, and I prayed that he would end up choosing his happiness over Edward, but I'd see when I got back.
"Let's go," I told Emmett as I put my window back up.
"Phoenix, Arizona! Here I come," Emmett, the idiot.