I hope this chapter clears up some of the inconcreteness of Max's feelings from last chapter! Let me know what you think and if I should include some of Fang's dream and/or a conversation or two between Shade and Fang in the next few chapters. If you have any questions, PM or review them to me and I'll do my best to answer them a.s.a.p! :) I'm soooo unbelievably sorry this took so long!

BroCode Ch.10—

Black mist surrounds me as I walk down a dimly lit hallway, the light padding of my bare feet masked by it. The mist clears as the path splits into two directions, two figures in the distance,—one blue, the other green—Fang's pleading face disappearing into the mist. Soon there was only one path with a smug-looking Shade turning and walking away.

I woke up, confused and—to be honest—freaking out (inside of course), only to see a plate of cookies with warmth drifting off it sitting on the coffee table. A glass of milk sat next to it, condensation dripping onto the table beneath it.

Hahah Oh, Momma.

I picked up the delights beside me and walked upstairs, passing many windows still getting pounded by rain, and slipping into my room. My door closed, I put the contents of my hands on the white window seat.

After retrieving my writing notebook and lucky feather gel pen, I sat, my back against the alcove wall, and started writing, hardly seeing the words pouring out onto the page.

Dear Shane Thomas Samuels,
Remember when Angel first met Amelia and she had a stuffy nose? Remember how she gave you your name? She was so little and could hardly talk but you thought she was the cutest thing in the world as soon as she called you Shade. I miss those days.

I miss the days when you, Ig, Fang, and I were the three musketeers + D'Artagnon and we'd goof around like I was just one of the guys-no feelings involved. No awkward, no question, no problem.

I don't really know how to tell you this but I'm just going for it: I don't feel how you want me to. You'll always be my friend but I can't keep lying to you. I'm sorry I never tell you everything but I just can't. I trust you, I really do, but there are some things that I have to deal with on my own. My issues are mine and I don't want you to worry about me. I'm sorry but I just can't be who you want, that girl isn't me. We're not for each other. You deserve someone who really cares about you and sees you as more than a brother.

I hope you can forgive me but if you don't I understand. I've lied to you, hidden from you, cheated you, and even cheated on you and I am so incredibly sorry, Shade. I'm a horrible girlfriend and I hope you can forgive me. Lissa really likes you. A lot. I'm sure you'd really like her if you'd give her a chance. Don't do it for me, do it for you-do it for her.

I care about you but I can't do this anymore, I'm so sorry. I love you Shade, just not enough.
~MAX

Stuffing another cookie into my mouth, I turned the page and went on.

Fang. Fang Fang Fang Fang. Best friend ever.
What can I possibly say to you that you can't already know? I can't even begin to tell you how much you mean to me. All that's ever on my mind is you. I love the way you scrunch your face whenever I mess up your hair, I get lost in your eyes, I love it when you smile the smile reserved for only me. You're my life saver. You've saved me from going crazy more times than you realize and I can't imagine a day without you. I can trust you with everything, I can tell you (nearly) everything, and I wish I could just say how much you really mean to me.

I love you, Fang. Everyone says that you feel the same way but I can't find it in myself to believe them unless I hear it from you. Best friends—neighbors—falling in love. Hah. How cliché is that.

But can you promise me one thing? Whether it's true or not, promise me we'll still be best friends. You'll still slip in through my window, we'll still have silent conversations, and the secrets we don't even realize exist. I love you, I wish I could tell you in person but I know you'll never see this and, for now, it's enough to keep me going—keep me sane.
~MAX (Your completely sane best friend. Hah.)

I walked over to my bed, the clear-of-crumbs cookie plate forgotten on the window seat. Notebook in hands, I belly-flopped onto the light blue and blugrass green bed and doodled across the blank space at the end of Shade's letter, my mind wandering.

I'm standing in a park devoid of all colors. As the scene comes into full view I realized I'm holding hands with someone. With the turn of my head I see Shade looking at me with his flirty, player smile—the one he'd give girls at school before he asked me out—only this time it missed all of the teasing behind it. It felt as if I'd simply blinked and the scene changed; Shade and Missy were sitting on the bench he'd asked me out on, both of them smiling, and Shade's arms around her. I was alone on the swing I'd been in just hours ago until Fang walked up beside me from behind. His dark blue dress shirt stood out against the gray background. "Come on, Beautiful." He spoke, opening his hand to me. The moment our skin connected, the bright green of the grass faded into view. Suddenly I felt like I was floating, landing lightly in a meadow. Fang's leaning beside me with his left arm propping him on his side, his right brushing my hair out of my face. He was whispering words I couldn't hear before kissing my temple, "Think about it, Max."

I opened my eyes slowly and, after realizing I'd fallen asleep, looked at my watch. Three in the morning? I dozed off for six and a half hours? Lifting my head I found myself tucked into bed, my notebook closed on the bedside table, a picture atop it. That's the picture from Fang's bedside table...what in the world is it doing here? Pulling myself up to look at the crooked picture I saw the memory as clear as the day it happened.

It was the late fall of sophomore year and Iggy, Shade, Fang, and I were walking around neighborhood and I had Fang's favorite hoodie on (I stole it…from his closet…while he was sleeping...). I was on his back giving him the noogy of his life with Shade a few feet away, bent over laughing. Iggy's pointer finger blocked the far edge of trees.

Curling up in my covers, I stared between my best friend's stubborn-pouting face and my now-boyfriend's red-tinted laughing face. What a mess I've made. After pulling my eyes off the picture I turned it over, searching for anything that would give a reason to why it's in my room.

"Think about it, Max."was written in pen at the top right corner, an eraser mark beneath it, anything originally written rubbed away. Wait…Fang came in last night and…he tucked me into bed and closed my notebook and moved my plate and was talking to me in real life while I was dreaming and….oh my goodness, the notebook. Fang read it. Oh dear, Fang read it. But, what does it matter? It's just….What was I thinking?

Ugh I need to talk to Iggy.

I searched through my bed for my phone and opened a new message. Oi. Igs. You up?

After 20 minutes without a reply I pulled myself out of the warmth of my quilts and went to shower. Being the impatient, nervous person that I am, I stayed under the warm flow, trying to sort out the mess of my thoughts—my phone on the counter not but a few feet away. About two hours later, once dressed, hair and teeth brushed, bed made, room and bathroom cleaned, he replied. Why on earth Iggy was up at almost six in the morning in the summer, don't ask me.

Yeah, what happened?

I told him I was coming over and, no questions asked, he pulled me through his front door and into his game room downstairs.

"Spill."

"I have one question first, why are you up so early?" I narrowed my eyes at him and pinched my lips together.

"That, my dear neighbor, is for me to know and you to not."

He sat on the opposite end of the couch, smiling smugly. "You look like you've been out. It's not hunting season, there aren't any Halo or COD tourneys this week, and your dad hates camping in July. What were you doing?"

The smug look melted off his face, only to be replaced by his 'Me be wise old dude' face. "You knowing that depends on what you have to tell me."

"It's about…well…"

"Let me guess: the two dark 'angels' as some girls say?"

I just raised my eyebrow at his word choice, trying to suppress the blush shooting to the surface. "Yes."

"Whoa. Call the press, James Michael Dawson got a straight answer from Maximum Ride. This must be big."

"Would you shut your face for two minutes?" I asked, play glaring at him.

"Yes ma'am. Now spill."

"You can be a real girl sometimes, you know that?" He simply smiled at me, "Well, anyways, uh, yesterday was kind of a big day and I…" The next hour was spent telling him of everything that's happened over the past four and a halfish days. Him giving understanding nods and encouraging looks at every pause and interrupted long stories to tell me I was going 'off to La La Land with smiles again'.

"And you really think he read the letter? Fang has more respect for privacy than that and we both know it."

"I know, and I trust him, it's just…everything that's happened and….all the stuff I wrote in there's making me paranoid and how I don't know what to say to Shade when I break up with him and knowing that it's going to hurt him an—"

"Trust me, Max, it'll all work out. And as for the letters, I have it from the source that the letters remain unread by everyone other than the author."

"You were with him this morning weren't you?"

"I never said that."

"Oh, but you did."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"Did not."

"Really, Ig? This again?"

The mostly-blind eyes, filled with teasing and mischief, winked at me. "Why? Are you suggesting we do something…else?" He asked, raising one eyebrow.

"Pervert."

"But that's why you love me."

"I'm having déjà vu right now. What the heck?"

"Three weeks ago, Nudge's basement, you and me, truth or dare."

"Oh yeah, when Nudge dared me to do something and your big ol' nasty brain took it the wrong way. Now I remember." I laughed, finishing what I was saying. "Hey, Ig. When should we implement Plan L: before or after I break up with Shade?"

"Definitely after. I'll talk to him while he's weepy. When's the big debacle?"

"Today. I can't take it knowing that I'm still going out with him when everything with Fang is…you know."

"That I do, little sister." He said, throwing his arm over my shoulders.

I looked at him, a curious eyebrow raised. "You do know I'm older than you, right?"

"Uh, Duh? You do know you're not really my sister, right?" he asked, mocking me.

"Uh, Duh?" We both started laughing only to be interrupted by the alarm on my phone, the strawberry-haired boy jumping up, throwing his arms into the air.

"Holy shnikees!" He looked down at the screen "Please tell me that's not the real time!"

"Stop yelling, Spazzface. It's 7:15—no one in their right minds are up right now."

He looked down at me, pursing his lips. "Yeah, we reeeeally don't fit into that category, do we?" I laughed again at his tired, gone-to-the-world face.

Getting up from the couch, I shoved him sideward by his head, him winding up laying on the down. "Whuwhuzatfo?" he asked, his voice muffled by sleep and the pillow.

"Go to sleep, Pyro."

I could've sworn I saw him smile as his heavy breathing filled the room.

On to the hard part I thought, opening a new text message, typing it in and pressing send before I could reconsider.

We need to talk.

Message sent.