A little over a month had passed since Celestia first began her dragon hunting expeditions. Sunshine's ponies and her royal guard had been diligent, but the results weren't what Celestia had hoped. Many of the dragons in Equestria's borders were young. They were detached from the politics of Azathoth, some having fled to make lives of their own independently of Nyarlathotep's rule. When cornered and brought to talk, either by force or bargains, they gave contradictory information and false explanations. They did anything to get their way or to get the armed ponies to leave them alone.
The ponies went ahead and plundered the dragons anyway, taking enough gems and trinkets to keep the military teams happy with their progress. The dragons didn't like it, of course, but they understood conflict well enough, and when it became clear that Celestia meant business they surrendered portions of their wealth with little more than disgruntled mutterings. Still, the goddess found herself frustrated. Her endeavors were still somewhat fresh, but a pattern was emerging, and Celestia was coming to find she might have to alter her plans again.
She touched down on Canterlot's landing pads, a sweating team of five straggling behind, straining themselves to keep up with their deity.
"Good work, gentlemen," Celestia lightly observed. "We've finished our entire route ahead of schedule, so now you'll all get a well-deserved rest while we wait for the others!"
The soldiers saluted with tired wings, then staggered off to find water, which they took down in gulps from posted buckets. It was a full fifteen minutes before another team returned home, by which point Celestia's group had already recovered and had taken to sunning themselves in the grass.
The leading officer, a dark gray pegasus pony, placed a wing to his brow but let his gaze fall unprofessionally and lecherously on Celestia's perfectly shorn fetlocks. "Reporting, miss!" he announced.
"I'm up here, sergeant," Celestia said, tipping the colt's chin up with her hoof. The sergeant grinned sheepishly. "Did you have any luck?" Celestia asked.
The sergeant nodded. "Actually, yes," he replied. "We got one. He wants to talk. No coercion necessary."
Celestia harrumphed. "Oh, plenty of them will tell you anything you need to know, 'no strings attached,'" she complained, making air quotes with her wings. "What does this one want? To personally talk to all the defenses of a nearby city at an isolated location? He needs all the city's defenses because he's frightened of being silenced?"
"I would not fall for that trick twice!" The sergeant remonstrated, rather proud of the learning process.
"Well that's good," Celestia said, frowning at the colt, "Because you know the last city was not too happy about being set on fire and having their citizens carried away in the clutches of a dragon."
The sergeant grimaced. It wasn't that big a deal. They had put the fires out and saved all the ponies, a few treatable injuries notwithstanding. Still, he was admittedly not next in line for a promotion after that.
"No, no! This one is different!" The sergeant recovered. "Although there might be just a slight request." Celestia gave the soldier a piercing look. "But nothing big!" he assured. "It's basically no coercion at all!"
Celestia ruffled her feathers. "Sergeant," she began, calmly, as if talking to an appreciated but troublesome child, "Of all the officers I personally assigned to this task, you are performing by far the worst."
She looked him in the eyes, and the sergeant's face sagged. His ears flattened abashedly against his skull.
"I know," he whimpered. "I know, but I'm trying as best I can."
Celestia sighed. "What's the request?" she asked.
Celestia found herself mildly surprised to be standing in the Everfree Forest. It was so close to the capital that it had been searched first thing. However, they hadn't checked the water, and looming over her like a purple snake with a goofy grin and meticulously cared-for mustache was none other than a sea serpent. Celestia wondered how and why he had gotten so far upstream, and she wondered what he had been eating to survive in the rivers.
"I'm so glad you found me!" the dragon cried out jubilantly, throwing his hands together. "And I'm so glad to have found you!"
Celestia smiled. She was aware of sea serpents, but not especially familiar with them. She was sure that some of them were ill-tempered and would wreck sailing craft.
"Oh, I know what you are thinking!" the dragon presumed, taking Celestia's three seconds of silence for shyness. "You're wondering to yourself, 'How ever does this magnificent serpent get his glorious hair to stay perfect while he's swimming!'"
Celestia shook her head, grinning politely.
"You're wondering how I got here!" he tried. "Ooh! You want to hear my story!" He leaned down, placing his chin on the ground. "It's a harrowing tale," he promised, then reeled back and threw his hand to his face. "But my, where to even begin!"
"Actually, I'm rather short on time," Celestia dismissed, tittering. "About your request -"
The serpent lunged forward in one spastic movement, landing his head on his hands and planting his elbows in the soil. Water sloshed from the river after him, towards Celestia's entourage, magically parting around the goddess but splashing several of the unsuspecting pegassi.
"So you'll do it?" He asked, eyes wide with delight. "You'll teach me a spell to get my hair just like yours?"
"Well, mine grows like this naturally," Celestia explained, tossing her head back to send an impressive wave through her flowing, sparkling mane. "I was born like this."
"Oh, posh!" cried the serpent, flipping his hand at the wrist, then setting it aside his face confidentially. "I mean of course it's natural! Mine too!" He winked. "I'm sure any male pony would be lucky to meet a female pony with such naturally fine hair!" he shouted over Celestia's head at the damp soldiers behind her. "Those are male ponies with you, aren't they?" he asked.
"Well yes, most of them -" Celestia was cut off.
"Well will you help me or not?" begged the serpent, his hands cupped together in prayer.
Celestia stared at the grinning beast for several moments, weighing her options. Was there anything to extort from him? If he had a gem cache it was certainly beyond the reach of Celestia's ponies. He was vibrantly flamboyant for a dragon, so the odds of him knowing other important dragons seemed remote. At the very least, he would be unlikely to have any kind of meaningful pull. Celestia was used to social butterflies having their uses – after all, Incitatus was allowed around the castle for a reason – but somehow she didn't see this purple creature fitting in well with the razor-toothed crowds.
The dragon fluttered his eyelashes ineffectually at the goddess. To be honest, Celestia decided, there was certainly nothing to lose. She concentrated, and in an instant flash of brilliant light, the deed was done. The Dragon's plain orange hair was replaced by a billowing crest of undulating white, red, yellow, and gold. It looked like a long, flowing pyre of flame cut into a very gentlemanly wig.
The purple serpent gasped. "Did you do it?" he asked, scrunching his hands into fists.
Celestia nodded.
"Oh glorious day!" proclaimed the dragon with a giddy chuckle.
Laughing like a lunatic, he plunged back into the river, sending another wave splashing out over the banks. This time Celestia's entourage were ready for it and flew out of the way. They waited to see if anything further would happen, but the serpent didn't come back. Celestia fought the urge to groan aloud. Dragons were so selfish! Gratitude is the weakest of collateral, and Celestia hadn't expect much from this one, but they seemed to have so little respect for other creatures that it was just appalling. At the very least she thought they'd have the decency to try to use the ponies for some extended plot, and Celestia could have worked with that, but every single one so far had merely tried to run them through half-hearted scams!
Even the dragons raised by Canterlot's magical scholars forgot who took care of them eventually. Celestia's groups had found several of the beasts, they having departed pony society after growing too old, and like the rest they treated ponies with disdain. It was as if some switch went off in their brains that caused them to realize they no longer needed ponies to live, and suddenly they just didn't care about family, old friends, or loyalty anymore!
Celestia fought her anger. She'd been slowed down by constant setbacks, and what she needed now was a new plan and a level head to think of it with. Her soldiers surrounded her in a hodgepodge fashion, having nothing else to do but wait for her orders. A few gazed into the river, possibly trying to gauge how deep it must be just by looking.
"Mistress?" checked one of the colts. "Should we go back to base?"
Celestia was scowling. She might have to trust Nyarlathotep and play his game after all. Whatever information she selectively received, whatever hand she was dealt, and whatever moves she was presented, that's what she'd have to use. It was going to be a disaster for the country. Celestia hated not being in control.
Gradually, Celestia let her face melt back into its sublime serenity. "Gather the troops and lets go home," she agreed, bitterly.
"Hey!" shouted one of the ponies at the riverbank. He was backing up hurriedly, the others staring at him and not minding what he was retreating from.
The surface of the river erupted at once, breached haphazardly by the great purple serpent. A massive wave flew in all directions and pulled several nearby ponies into the water. Their heads popped up when the drag subsided and they clawed at the banks, yanking themselves angrily back onto dry land.
The dragon was gazing fixedly into a gigantic hand mirror. "How does it look?" he asked, not noticing the soldiers he had nearly drowned. "Do you think it's fabulous? I'm sure to get noticed now!"
"You came back!" Celestia observed. "Why?" she asked, suspicious.
"Well of course I came back!" the dragon replied, strumming his claws through his fantastic new mane. "I just needed to get a mirror right away!" He clutched his mirror to his chest, then turned to Celestia. He appeared to be crying, but it was hard to tell with water already running down his face. "You ponies! You've been so kind to me!" He choked.
Celestia wasn't sure what to say. Here she was just about to proclaim all grown dragons devoid of any real graciousness, and now one was weeping and thanking her for something as trivial as fixing his hair.
"First the kindest pony fixed my mustache with her very own tail, and now... and now..." the dragon sniffled.
He bent down and grabbed Celestia as one might grab a dove, clasping a wing against her body. The other wing was left to hang freely over his thumb. The soldiers took the skies and began buzzing around the dragon's head like an angry squad of wet bees.
"Put the princess down!" someone yelled, but the dragon payed no heed.
The massive beast brought Celestia to eye level, far above the ground, then smooshed her back against his cheek. Celestia squirmed and gritted her teeth as he rubbed dampness into her luxurious fur.
"Excuse me!" Celestia cried out a bit desperately. She should have teleported away from him before it got to this point, but she didn't think he would actually go through with it, and the idea was too late now.
"How can I ever repay you?" the dragon sobbed, an emotional wreck.
"You could set me down please!" Celestia suggested.
"Oh," the dragon replied simply, realizing what he was doing.
He set Celestia on the ground slantwise, forcing her to stumble back to balance. The goddess refolded her wings, primly, as the serpent patted her nicely on the head. Her soldiers were still flying loops around the creature, not completely sure if they were in a combat situation or just a stupid situation. Celestia dried herself magically, then, feeling the best thing to do after being so degraded was to show some confidence and a sense of humor, held her wings aloft and raised her head straight and high.
"You're certainly affectionate for a dragon!" she teased, her colts still buzzing impotently about.
"Oh, I know! It's a curse!" admitted the dragon, rolling his eyes.
"But there is something you could do to thank me," Celestia went on. "Can you tell me anything about Azathoth?"
"Is that all?" the dragon asked, wiping imaginary sweat from his brow, "Thank goodness! That's easy! What would you like to know?"
"Tell me about Nodens," Celestia requested.
"Oh, him? Kind of nasty, I understand. Very old. Humiliated once by the Great One way before I was born," the dragon said.
"By Nyarlathotep?" Celestia clarified.
The dragon nodded. Ages ago, not long after Nyarlathotep's reign as the dragon king began, Nyarlathotep was besieged by criticism and the greedy ambitions of other dragons. The purpose of the king, in essence, was to prevent conflicts through deterrence. When two dragons fought over a mountain or treasure, the king would allow them to weaken themselves. Then, he would arrive when one could not defend himself from the king, and the king would take the one's land and spoils. The other fighting dragon would be allowed to live for a price. The result was very little incentive for direct, unaided conflict, and it led to a system of laws of a sort.
Naturally, the dragon king had to be the strongest dragon alive, or else he could not fulfill the role. In early times, many dragons were of nearly equal power, and with the right alliances a relatively weak dragon could easily fend off the king. At a point, the dragons began to wonder what purpose Nyarlathotep truly served. Resentful of having to pay tributes in order to conduct their business or engage in battles, they did their best to undermine him.
Finally, Nyarlathotep gave in to their constant pressure, and he abdicated, leaving another, younger dragon, Nodens, to rule in his stead. The breakdown of all the laws followed instantly afterward, and the effect it had on Azathoth was catastrophic. Dragons with much wealth and standing were assaulted from all sides, and the ownership of territory became an unanswerable question. Meanwhile, Nyarlathotep attended court meetings with the same frequency as his former detractors, and there he did his best to sabotage Nodens in the same way his courtiers had sabotaged him.
Unable to tolerate the anarchy any longer, the dragons at last drove Nodens from his position and reinstalled Nyarlathotep as the dragon king. He reclaimed stability for Azathoth, and has been consolidating power since. To the day, Nyarlathotep has not been forced to step down from his throne or give in to petulant demands again. His power was strengthened and made absolute, in fact, so that he would be able to deal with that time's destruction of society.
"And that's pretty well what most dragons know of poor old Nodens," the purple serpent finished. "Not a lucky fellow, although I think he's sleeping now."
"That's all most dragons know?" Celestia repeated.
Celestia had heard a lot of fantastic stories about Nodens from the local lizard populations. Many of them were simply made up, extravagant lies to inflate the figure to the point of being a mythical figure. After all, as Marigold Foal had taught her, big lies are often harder to see for falsehood than small ones. Who in their right mind lied about being a government official planning the destruction and sale for scrap of the royal palace? Nobody believed a lie like that, especially not well-educated ponies who should know better, so naturally well-educated ponies that should know better were the ones to fall for it.
"That's all I know!" the purple dragon admitted, throwing his hands up in the air.
"When was the last time you were in Azathoth?" Celestia checked.
The serpent scratched his chin. "I guess about two or three decades ago," he estimated. "Why?"
"Azathoth is in a state of civil war," Celestia informed, bluntly.
"How horrid," the dragon remarked, placing a hand on his cheek for mild concern.
"And Nyarlathotep has made it clear to me that he might allow the war to spread into Equestrian territory," Celestia went on.
The dragon shuddered. "Oh, dear! I'd hate to be in your shoes," he said, pointing daintily.
Overhead, Celestia's soldiers circled ominously. If the princess could judge the formation, it looked like they were ready to summon a tornado on a moment's notice. She counted nine ponies, so one must have run off to fetch a storm cloud in case lighting was called for. The purple serpent with his flaming new hair was utterly oblivious to it.
"Is that why you're asking me about Nodens?" he asked. "You know, he's been sleeping for so long, I'd hate to think of what's giving him to nerve to pick a fight with Nyarlathotep. Nobody fights with Nyarlathotep these days."
"What does his sleeping have to do with anything?" Celestia asked, perplexed.
She was in the dangerous territory of asking a stupid question, which defied everything she ever strove to maintain. Needing to have the obvious explained to her was a good way to obliterate the appearance of omniscience she worked so hard for. However, the fact was that the lifestyles of most dragons were relatively unstudied by ponies. The creatures were terrifying, uncooperative, and tended to be too smart for comfort. It was any pony's guess why they chose to seal themselves from the world and nap for eons.
The serpent wracked his brain for a suitable response, stroking his goatee between his thumb and index finger. "It's not something I can just tell you about," he tested, slowly. He laughed. "In fact, I'm not that good at it myself! Don't tell the other dragons though."
"Could you try?" implored Celestia. Any knowledge was better than none.
"Oh..." he trailed off, rolling his hand about in the air while he searched for words. "It's no good in Equestrian, really," he capitulated. "Nothing translates closely enough. Between dragons you just sort of..." The serpent placed his hands in the air haltingly, backing up mentally. "It's like the magic in your horn!" he concluded. "You couldn't really explain to me what it's like or what it feels like. It's just something that is for you."
Celestia might have liked to pry for more, but she suspected that was going to have to suffice. This dragon was being perfectly polite, and for the first time since starting her mission officially she found herself unable to poke holes in the stories she was being told. Still, she wouldn't be getting any crucial information as she hoped. At least not yet anyway.
"Dragon," Celestia started.
"Steven," the dragon corrected, smiling and putting his fingertips to his chest.
"Steven, you've been very forthcoming with me, and I want you to know that I'll be happy to help you out if you have any more interesting grooming requests!"
Steven beamed.
"I was wondering, though," Celestia proceeded, "I would love to meet other dragons with your sense of dignity and politeness. You wouldn't happen to know any, would you?"
"With my sense of dignity and politeness? No, not a soul!" Steven proclaimed.
Celestia's spirits fell. So much for meeting dragons by meeting dragons.
"But I know some dragons with plenty of social flair, if you know what I mean!" the purple serpent revealed, flipping his hands.
Hope blossomed.
"You wouldn't happen to know any eligible young dragon girls, would you?" Celestia asked, prodding the air with her knee suggestively.
"Me? Of course! I know plenty of single ladies! They simply can not get enough of me," Steven boasted haughtily. "Goodness. Such dears, too. Except for that Lola! Ooh, how she frustrates me!" He waved a finger. "I wouldn't wish her on anyone! She seems like a victim at first, but soon she's ruined your life, and you don't even see it coming!"
Celestia's heart skipped a beat. She wanted to leap up in the air and punch at the sky with the thrill of near success.
"She sounds perfect! I'd be ecstatic to meet her as soon as possible!" Celestia exclaimed.
An aging, red-furred Miracle hunched indifferently in the corner of Celestia's personal study as the princess bustled about the room, gathering spell books and making little notes with her quill. It was growing towards the evening, but where Celestia trod the room was lit like mid afternoon.
"I've had a splendid day today," Celestia said without looking at the colt. "I hope you have some news to make me even cheerier!"
Celestia dropped a book on her desk and began searching through the index.
"It's the same as last week," grumped Miracle. "There have been no traceable financial transactions. No talk among Canterlot's ponies about rebuilding anything. Alfred doesn't know a thing about what's going on, and Luna hasn't left the castle."
Celestia slammed her book closed and set it aside, her face becoming traced with distinguishable anxiety. She went to the shelf and began scanning for another volume.
"But Hastur is still having his little play dates with Luna every evening?" she asked.
Miracle nodded, gravely. "Alfred tells us he and Luna have grown very close," he confirmed. "He seems to dote on the girl, but they don't discuss her restoration. Aside from his nightly visits and his morning attendances to your court to generate a fantasy of Azathoth, he vanishes without a word."
Celestia flipped open another book and began reading from it, quietly.
"You should consider placing him under house arrest, if it concerns you," advised Miracle.
The goddess went on reading, wordlessly, as if Miracle were not even present.
"I worry about you, Celestia," Miracle confided.
"Princess," Celestia hummed, her nose in her book.
"Are you keeping something from me, my porcelain goddess?" Miracle asked.
Celestia glanced up and shot a fading look at the middle-aged colt. "Yes," she replied.
Miracle chuckled. "Ah-ha! That's why I love you, dearest, but whether you have an ace hidden in your bridle or not, you should know there is some talk of you losing your grip."
Celestia shut the book and re-shelved it, grinning. "That reminds me," she said, "How is Bucephalus doing?"
"I think the castle's fillies are done making fun of him at this point, and aside from that things seem quite in control with the fool," Cecil reported.
Bucephalus had developed a scar on his ear after Celestia bit him, and for about a week he was the laughing stock of the castle. She honestly hadn't meant to bite him so hard, but it was a little late to take it back now. Since then he had been a furious force of military duty, and Equestria's lower generals had been whipped into line in no time. Furthermore, the charger had also established a militia training program with specific emphasis on the southern cities. Supposedly he was placing a great deal of importance on teaching the civilians the strategy of exchanging ground for time.
However, Celestia's general was running an incapacitated army. Equestria as a whole was in fine shape, but the government was flat broke. These things tended to happen, and Equestria's finances would bounce back eventually, but any kind of extended campaign would cause serious economic problems and the citizens would feel it. That was, unless either Bucephalus or Celestia could find some way to make the enemy equally impoverished and unable to fight.
"Poor Bucephalus," Celestia mused wistfully. "If he can pull off some sort of miracle, then I'll have to do something nice for him."
Cecil glowered. "A stallion does not need extra reward for merely doing his job!" he derided, jealously. "Especially an earth pony of all things. And what will you do if he can't meet the requirements of his station?"
Celestia shrugged and pulled another book from the shelf. "A failing war is always someone's fault," she replied distantly.
It took a few days for Celestia's airponies to hunt down the infamous Lola. Everything always lost Celestia just a little more time. As an immortal, Celestia felt like she should be over this feeling by now, but time was one of the few expenditures one could never demand a refund on. Even if she wasn't dying, everyone around her certainly was, however slowly. Each passing second was as precious as the life of Celestia's – well, the lives of the closest thing a good leader could call friends.
As it would turn out, Lola lived towards the north, near Stalliongrad. Scouts told Celestia that she was some kind of wooly breed of dragon, with thick fur, and Celestia found herself flying at a high altitude over snow-capped mountains. It was chilly, and what the goddess had in mind for Lola was not something she wanted spread around verbally, so she was making the trip alone. In any case she was faster that way.
At last she reached the peak that had been drawn out on her map. Pine trees decorated the white, fluffy mountain, and little birds flitted about between them at the base. It was getting to be the warm season, and it was surprisingly temperate closer to the ground. Celestia spotted a massive cave entrance high above and landed there, sinking into the fresh powder up to her ankles.
She trudged into the yawning entryway, kicking snow off her hooves as she made contact with bare stone. With light flowing in like a gentle stream behind her, wings abreast, the goddess virtually filled the cavern. The entire space flooded illumination, like the sun rising to peek through a window. In the far reaches of the cave, a light blue dragon shielded its eyes with an outstretched wing.
The creature was lithe and slender for a thunder lizard, and it had a wreath of white fur around its neckline. She had hair in other places, but it seemed to have no practical purpose for fighting the cold, simply highlighting certain parts of her body more than anything. Her scales glittered like tiny water droplets in Celestia's presence, not comparing to the small collection of jewels she was lying on but still a touch attractive all the same.
The dragon lowered her wing, squinting, and spotted the white horse that had invited itself into her home. She gazed, dumbfounded, mouth slightly ajar, but then a mischievous grin crept across her razor-fanged maw. She prowled on all fours towards Celestia, body forward like a stalking cat. Celestia, meanwhile, merely stood her ground. The dragon approached, smile widening further and further, revealing a plane of deadly teeth behind curled lips, but halted right where Celestia could feel Lola's damp breath.
Lola looked small, Celestia thought. Or at least smaller than she thought Lola would be, in any case. Celestia considered introducing herself, but only smiled weakly before the Cheshire grin of the portending beast. Celestia's gorgeous hair flowed silently on magical currents. She blinked as the smell of sulfur and old meat stung her eyes.
"You're so cute!" the dragon squealed, pitch high and grating.
Celestia's heart took off like a shot at the sudden climax of volume. Her natural instincts kicked in, grabbed her by the reigns, dug spurs into her ribs, and clamored that she fly away like a terrified bird, sensing all the obviously present danger tied to a large, stupid predator. Celestia took several steps backwards, and Lola lunged, claws outstretched.
This time, however, Celestia was ready. In a flash, she teleported several paces away, just outside the grasp of the beast.
"Don't be scared, I'm not going to put you in my mouth or anything," cooed the dragon.
She scrabbled to clutch Celestia in her hand, and Celestia danced away, ducking and magically changing positions in space to avoid capture.
"Stop squirming!" Lola pleaded. "I promise I won't mishandle you!"
She slapped at the ground where Celestia was standing, apparently trying to stun the pony or pin her to the floor, but came in contact with only bare stone.
"Miss!" Celestia called, a hint panicked. Celestia knew she wasn't in any real danger, but it was hard explaining that to her body.
"Relax!" Lola demanded, searching under her feet to make sure she wasn't accidentally stepping on her quarry. "I just want to touch your hair. It's so pretty!"
"Thank you, but -" Celestia said, evading another careless swatting, "But I haven't even introduced myself."
The dragon giggled. "You're such a cute little thing!"
She continued to paw fruitlessly at the ground while Celestia dodged her, Lola maintaining a persistent position with rump in the air and tail curled inquisitively upward. Eventually, the child-like grin faded from Lola's face and turned into a frown. She plopped down on her haunches and began to sniffle.
"I'm sorry miss, but you can't play so roughly with me," Celestia consoled, appearing front and center before the creature.
"I haven't been with a pony in ages," Lola quavered, tears in the corners of her eyes. "I used to live with them when I was little. They're always scared of me now."
"Ah," Celestia observed, putting the pieces together. "Did you used to be an assistant to some nice little unicorn?"
Lola nodded. So it seemed that here was one of the few dragons from Celestia's schools that still remembered her old bonds with ponykind.
"Well, I am Princess Celestia," Celestia said, providing a royal curtsy.
Lola gasped. "Celestia was queen of the ponies when I was just a developing baby!" she announced, up on her history.
"Princess," Celestia corrected, curtly.
"Is it like an honorary name or something? Are you Celestia's granddaughter?" Lola asked, awestruck.
"No, dear," Celestia tried. Lola seemed a tad dense – surely she had to know that Celestia was the sun goddess. It wasn't as if the creature was living in an uneducated environment during her tentative years. "I'm the Celestia. The one and only."
Lola laughed, her eyes lighting up. "Really? You must be so old!" she clapped her hands together. "I didn't think ponies lasted that long!"
Celestia rolled her eyes. "I'm young in spirit, you know," she insisted with a betrayed sense of honesty.
"I bet," Lola agreed, leaning back to all fours again. "Oh my gosh, it must have been at least two centuries by now. What are you doing here? I'm too big to help ponies with their studies, and ponies can't afford to feed me anyway." She pointed at her tiny pile of precious minerals. "I barely feed myself. I'm lucky some nice boy dragons help me out sometimes."
A wave of disdain swelled up in Celestia's inner feminist. Her inner politician, however, smothered her inner feminist with a pillow and cackled like a villain.
"Oh, I know how that is," Celestia commiserated, master manipulator of the male heart. "It's so lucky to find a kind fellow to help you out when times get tough."
Lola bobbled her head, happy to find a friend who understood. "Especially because other ladies can be so mean," she complained. "They say such nasty things about me."
Celestia snorted.
"What?" asked Lola, suddenly feeling the center of some joke.
"Nothing, just a bit of a sneeze," Celestia quickly dismissed. "Oh, but sometimes stallions can be so pushy!"
"I don't know about stallions," admitted Lola, "But male dragons? All. The. Time." She wrapped her wings defensively around her shoulders. "Don't they know I have needs? I have my sensitive spots."
Celestia was buzzing with sadistic energy. She wasn't just going to throw a wrench in Nodens' political life. She was going to bury him alive.
"What you need," Celestia said, fighting the urge to sell too hard, "What you need is a real dragon to take care of you! There's no point in putting out for Equestria's lowlifes, a dragon as pretty as you!"
"I'm not that pretty," Lola abashed, grinning and absentmindedly assuming a taut posture that made Celestia feel a touch uncomfortable. "And I'm still a virgin," she reported, mechanically.
Celestia wasn't sure if virginity even mattered to dragons. She didn't know if Lola was all that sure either.
"Nonsense!" Celestia chided, disbelieving both lies. "But if you do think you could be a little prettier, you know I am the god princess. I know some spells."
Lola's eyes widened. "Prettier how?" she asked.
Celestia cantered to the dragon and motioned for her to bring her ear closer.
"Anything you can think of, of course," Celestia whispered. "I'm like your own little genie."
"You'd do that?" Lola responded, staring at Celestia with one large, green eye.
Lola picked at her tail and gazed into the distance. Celestia thought she could see lascivious, private thoughts tap dancing through the dragon's head, stopping to wave out at the world through her eyes and though the way she wrung her hands. Celestia knew girls like this. They thought: if only I were prettier, everyone would respect me and I'd be happy. They believed sex appeal and a following of males was the only difference between them and the world's greatest female leaders.
"I'm happy the way I am," Lola decided, punching a hole in Celestia's own lust for success.
The goddes wasn't ready to give in yet, but Lola was now staring at the ground, drawing invisible doodles on the stone with her claw.
"Not that I've given a lot of thought about it, but there are some things I would change, though. Maybe things I'd like to be bigger," she countermanded.
Lola proceeded to spill out a veritable laundry list of physical improvements, none of which included being smarter or more introspective. Some requests were downright lewd, and Celestia required a detailing as to what made certain features more attractive for certain reasons. Each one Celestia fulfilled in turn, having spent days looking up body alteration spells for this purpose. This was the good stuff. Not a dragon in the world would know Lola wasn't naturally born this way.
"My god," Lola breathed, having all but run out of ideas. She ran her hands along new curves, feeling out parts of her body that had been made smaller or larger than they originally were. "Oh, make my spines and claws exactly like cut emeralds," she proposed.
Celestia did. It was a trivial exercise of power. The dragon stared at her gleaming new digits, and as she did so fright began to crease her face. She clutched her snout, then pulled her head in and breathed into her chest.
"I don't even look like my old self anymore," she murmured, eyes dilating. Lola began to hyperventilate. "What if I want to go back? I can't even remember -"
Celestia suddenly felt a pang of guilt. It was dawning on her that she had forgotten she was drastically changing a living creature. It was possible she was going a little faster than was really advisable. Still, the needs of the many outweighed the needs of the few.
"I think you look absolutely gorgeous!" Celestia radiated. "Besides," she said, polishing a golden horseshoe by rubbing it on her chest, "We can always send you back to the way you were."
Celestia examined the reflection in her hoof, winking at herself. It was a bluff, of course. Lola wasn't changed by an illusion of some sort. What Celestia had done was irreversible, and she could only send the girl back by guesstimation and by asking Lola's own memory of herself, which was probably skewed in the first place. Still, she had the suspicion that it wouldn't matter.
Everything about Lola led Celestia to believe she was both insecure and desperate to be noticed. It was in the way Lola strove to make Celestia look at parts of her body while at the same time covering up if Celestia glanced too directly. It was about the things Lola said and the way she carried on. She just seemed to be sad, but in that extremely cruel and subtle way that can cause most not to notice it. Such individuals are often referred to as sinking ships, and they are known to take others with them. Females like Lola, especially, had the tendency to blind males with charm, and the unlucky ones never realized they were being slowly pulled beneath the waves.
Lola began to calm down. She let go of her nose and resumed her normal breathing. "You promise?" she asked.
Celestia nodded in wide affirmative strokes. She could not be more sure of anything if she wanted to be, she conveyed. Lola was gradually overtaken by reassurance.
"Actually, I'm a little excited," she said. "I know some dragons that are going to wish they were a lot nicer to me."
"Not just any dragons," Celestia cut in. "I know about you, Lola. You're destined for great things."
Lola blinked. She looked lost.
"I've had visions about you. I'm a seer, Lola," Celestia lied.
"You can see the future?" Lola gaped in disbelief.
Celestia shrugged. "Of course! They wouldn't make me the princess of Equestria if I couldn't," Celestia boasted. This, at least, was partially true. "I dreamt of you and a great dragon named Nodens together. You're meant to be a very important part of his life."
Lola clutched at her chest. "Oh my gosh! I always knew I'd do something important. I knew there was some reason why Goddess Celestia came to see me! When do I meet him?"
The dragon rose to her hind feet, bringing herself to an impressive height. Celestia worried the girl might slam her head on the cavern ceiling in her excitement.
"That's the trouble," Celestia forebode. "I saw a great number of trials in your future, and to fulfill the events, you have to travel to Azathoth and find Nodens. There, he will take you as his wife, and in time – though I can't say when – you will influence him to great successes."
"Azathoth?" Lola repeated. Her face fell, and the dragon rocked back to the ground. "I don't know anything about that place."
"Well that's a cause for concern," Celestia assessed. "You see, I don't know anything about it either." She smiled expectantly. "I hoped we could be pen pals and you could tell me all about it."
Lola took this in slowly, turning it over in her mind as if it were fragile. Perhaps as if it were a dream about to flutter away from her in the waking hours.
"I can't believe I'm going to be that important. Queen Celestia? Pen pals with me?" Lola remarked dreamily, staring at the world outside her cave.
"Princess," corrected Celestia. "I can set up a direct link between you and I. Any time you want to send me a message, just write it down on a piece of parchment and set it on fire. Easy, right? And if you have any questions, I can do my best to be your guide."
Lola nodded, and Celestia cast one more spell on the dragon. The goddess suddenly had a feeling she was going to be receiving a great deal more letters in the future. It was annoying, but everyone wants to talk about themselves, and having one's trivial tribulations noticed by the god princess was certainly among the highest levels of self-satisfaction.
"Okay, I can do this," Lola told no one in particular, hope rising in her voice like the break of day. "I'll ask Steven. He can help me!"
Again, Celestia's inner feminist muttered something nasty about Lola. Was it really all that appropriate that the girl's first instinct was to find an ex-boyfriend and beg for favors? Celestia's inner tyrant just laughed and demanded to be carried to her throne every day by a procession of enslaved, masculine stallions. Her inner politician brokered for a middle ground and recommended telling other ponies to think of the children.
Colonel Sunshine had been in Azathoth for nearly two and a half weeks now, and even with a team of highly trained ponies behind her, it was horrible. The air was humid and stagnant. Most of the region south of Equestria was dense jungle, and living in the trees were mosquitoes the size of a pony's hoof. Swampland popped up over wide stretches, making it difficult to find good land to rest on when cloud cover was bare. Worst of all were the nights.
At first, Sunshine had been willing to set up small camps on the ground. It seemed like a good choice because it was faster than anchoring clouds and setting up provisions to beat the cold night air at high altitude. However, when the sun went down things came out of the forest. In the fringes of Azathoth it was just obnoxious creatures. Small cats and poisonous reptiles that crawled out of holes in the ground to make their living, but as the team delved further the ponies on watch started noticing eerie figures.
The first couple of sightings were easily dismissed – obviously just imaginations running wild in tired minds. Then they grew more numerous. Ponies would hear scratching and strange gibbering noises from outside the camp. They would spot shapes in the trees, or a pony might cry out, having seen something watching her from the brush. Obviously, there were animals that lived in the jungle. Sunshine tried to keep everyone calm, knowing that the fear and anxiety would only spread and would lead to exaggerated rumors. After all, whatever was out there seemed to be more frightened of the ponies than the ponies were of them. Ponies weren't a natural prey to anything in Azathoth.
Still, tales ran rampant. Ponies claimed they saw the accusing faces of dead family members in the darkness. Others said they heard voices talking to them. Then one night, two ponies went missing; Sunshine had no idea where they had gone to. There was no trace. It was possible they had deserted, but without supplies they wouldn't have gotten far. A somber demeanor fell over the entire detachment, and Sunshine, having split her squads to cover more ground, now wondered how the other groups were faring.
In honesty, Sunshine had seen figures too, but she had tried to shake them off and convince herself she was only letting the jitters get the better of her. That was what she'd tried to tell everyone else to keep them calm. Then, at last, while keeping watch, something did come close enough to the light where she could see it and no longer deny there were horrors in the woods. The thing that came stood on the very edge of the firelight, just watching Sunshine balefully.
It was tall and slender. Its asymmetrical body was mottled and cracked. At its side flaccid, tendril-like appendages hung. Seeing it in the dim, flickering light, Sunshine wasn't sure that it had a face or if it had multiple faces. Something about the way it was shaped gave her the impression she could pick out various places where a face could be, or she could see designs that resembled a face. It was hard to tell.
After spotting the one she began to see them everywhere. She recognized them for what they were now. Not tangled roots or hanging tree limbs. They were living things, and they were everywhere. The whole squad was surrounded every night, and Sunshine tried to count them. She tried, but the apparitions moved around while she wasn't watching them. At a point, she resolved that the ponies were outnumbered, and the things were coming closer towards the camps every night.
That's when Sunshine gave the order to relocate to the clouds every evening for the remainder of the mission. Despite the cold, it came as a relief to most of the squad, and the ponies were far happier huddling together for warmth than they were braving whatever was on the ground. Avoiding the ground, though, meant less time for grazing, and that was going to lead to malnutrition in time. Still, a mundane problem was preferable to the whispering sounds and watchful eyes below.
They pushed deeper still in the boundaries of the dragon's sovereign land, having yet to find camps or dragon caves. The ponies had regained some composure. They were now bickering some about hunger and the long nights, but they were scheduled to return to rendezvous at the Equestrian border with the other squads soon, and in no time at all their harrowing mission would be over for now. They had maps and enough first-hand concerns to write a book on. Sunshine didn't care what ponies said, nobody had ever been out this far before. It was not possible.
Yet, despite the improved spirits, a new terror rose up to meet them. At night once again, from atop a chilly, unmodified cloud, Sunshine noticed a mist rolling over the earth in the moonlight. She shuddered, wondering what those things in the jungle might have done if the ponies had been caught in poor visibility like that, but her thoughts took a completely new course in an instant. Something drifted out of the fog – a long and bulbous thing like a jellyfish.
First the one, then another and another, like a cloud of spores being released from a popped blemish. They rose high into the sky and drifted lazily in the atmosphere, reaching up as far as the clouds Sunshine's soldiers were sleeping in. They were speckled gray and white, and their bodies were covered in tiny, needle-like, translucent hairs. The ponies were shaken awake by their friends, and in groups the ponies tried to maneuver their clouds between the things if they drifted too close.
The need to move was sparring, but forced everyone on edge and kept them at vigil. Her charges were exhausted, though, and Sunshine gave an order to let the ponies sleep in their regular shifts. The ponies on watch would keep an eye out and move the clouds if necessary. The floating creatures weren't objectively seeking them, and only the occasional one or two reached high enough to risk touching them.
They raised their clouds up higher to minimize the risk and waited it out. Sunshine was stressed and tired. More than anyone, she'd tried to keep a stiff upper lip and maintain a good example. She maintained an expressed interest in duty and an objective perspective. She was the only one who wasn't able to bicker or talk about how she really felt.
Somewhere on her cloud, she heard a soft sobbing. Seeking out the source of the noise, Sunshine found a young colt weeping to himself. The others were laying about with eyes cracked open, staring into the night sky, kept awake by the weakness of their comrade. Sunshine knelt down a nuzzled him until he stopped.
"We'll be going home soon," she whispered. "Just a few more days, and we can tell everyone we're the bravest ponies in Equestria."
She stayed with him until he nodded off. The others found respite with him. Sunshine looked over the edge of the cloud at the nerve-wracking things still floating below in droves. There was a sea of them. There was no doubt in Sunshine's mind that if there were a place that would breed enormous, fire breathing monstrosities with a reputation for aggression and anti-social behavior, Azathoth was that place.
The next morning Sunshine woke, few too precious hours having been slept the night before. The sun hadn't risen long ago, but it was already beating down on them with a vengeance. The group packed up their things and wrung a little water from the clouds. They were going to be flying until the afternoon, and then they'd take a break to graze and rest so the heat didn't kill them.
Sunshine couldn't see any signs of the weird creatures from the night, but she was starting to get used to that around here. Day and night in Azathoth were completely unalike one another, but there were plenty of strange predators that hung around in the light. The crucial separating factor was that the ponies could clearly see their enemies during the day.
The squad zipped across the sky for an hour or two, listless and without verbal exchange. Sunshine felt herself nodding off here and there, but was often leading the formation and did her best to keep alert.
"Look!" someone yelled.
In the distance, a large puff of black smoke was spiraling up from the ground. The ponies flew towards it, and found a massive, yellowing, stone ziggaraut looming over the horizon. It was an enormous structure, covered in elaborate etchings and spotted with mossy overgrowth. Smoke issued out from numerous holes built into the sides. Outside, several dragons – Sunshine counted five - of different size and color were sunning themselves peaceably. They themselves were a great deal larger than any dragons Sunshine had seen in Equestria.
One dragon lifted his leviathan head to the sky, looking directly at the scouting party. The others turned their attention to his line of sight, and now they were all watching.
"Let's go back and report," Sunshine ordered.
She banked tightly and led the squad with her in the opposite direction. She held out a hope that they wouldn't be identified as intruders, or at the very least that they'd be confused with some kind of large bird. A smaller, in the relative sense, green and brown dragon with great, branched antlers rose from its place and stretched its body. First it arched its back, then spread out its impressive wingspan at far angles.
Please mistake us for birds, Sunshine begged fate. Please, please, please!
The antlered titan bellowed out an earth-shattering roar. The bass in the beast's voice made Sunshine's teeth rattle and liquified her courage. The Colonel amped up her flight speed to double time, the other ponies following after her in organized panic.
Please! Sunshine pleaded. Just birds!
No luck. The dragon kicked off from the ziggaraut and slid into the sky like a serpent in water. With terrifying grace, the great demon accelerated behind them and rose to their altitude. Sunshine glanced over her shoulder and could see the thing, looking large enough to swallow several ponies at once in a single bite. She broke into a full sprint, and the squad's formation tightened to break the wind ahead of them more easily.
They were tired and had already been flying for too long, and above all else, ponies were not very aerodynamic. The dragon, on the other hand, was a copperhead with a body like an arrow, and it weaved swiftly behind them, closing the distance margin by margin. Sunshine's wings burned as she pushed them, but flapping as hard as she could she couldn't create any more space between her and the gargantuan. The squad began to break as tired ponies lost stamina, and the dragon pulled up behind them.
It opened its bladed mouth like a scoop to catch stragglers in the back of the group. Sunshine waved a signal, frantically.
"Scatter!" she screamed against the wind.
The ponies split off at all angles, just like they'd practiced back at home. Sunshine watched to see how the dragon reacted and her pulse stopped. Without so much as a second of confusion, the dragon effortlessly tore after a slower soldier who had flown downward in an attempt to gain speed. There was not a hint of wind resistance hindering the beast's massive frame; the sky merely slipped off of its movements like cooking oil.
Sunshine looped around, her heart pounding out of her chest. Two other ponies followed her, and they made a bid to fly directly over the chased colt. The beleaguered soldier spotted them and recognized the maneuver. They flew directly behind him, then all four ponies banked sharply in a new direction. Sunshine puttered as fast as her body would take her, terrified to look back and see what had happened. In her ears she thought she heard a faint zinging sound, and she flashed a look to her rear. The massive green devil was hot on her tail, teeth bared and gaining alarmingly fast.
Three ponies came in from overhead to save the day. They met then split in all directions again, Sunshine zipping to the right. They were close to the ground now, and she couldn't go any lower without being in danger. She just kept flying, sweating profusely, body clamoring for a break. Sunshine felt like her heart was going to explode. Behind her, the singing whistle of a fast moving projectile continued to sound, and sure enough the monster was still pursuing her, closer than before.
Sunshine had to take a risk. She had to give herself a break. She threw her wings out and dropped just a little lower, surrendering both speed and altitude.
Please! she begged, vision spinning and lungs hurting for oxygen.
The dragon whizzed by, just feet above her back, overshooting Sunshine in a stroke of calculated luck. Sunshine stuttered in mid air and tried to catch herself. Her mouth hung open and she sucked at humid air. Her wings hurt, and she couldn't muster the energy to rise up to a safer height. If this kept up, Sunshine thought, she might not even be able to make the flight home.
The dragon looped through the air without slowing. Sunshine cast about, hoping to see more help on the way, but she didn't spot any other ponies. The trick they'd invented was that the rest of the team could get away while the dragon confused and tired itself chasing a few alternating groups. Sunshine didn't know if her squad had escaped, leaving her, or if they were just not in her immediate sight. There wasn't any time to puzzle it out; the gargantuan monster was heading right for her again at speeds fast enough to squash her like a bug against a windshield.
Sunshine turned and fought her own body for control. She pumped her wings madly, accelerating as fast as she could. She didn't know what to do now. She was as good as doomed and she was only delaying the inevitable. The dragon glided in from behind her, matching her speed as it came within snapping distance. Sunshine tried to think of anything she could do. Any trick to stop it from ending like this.
The dragon's gaping jaw drew forward, and Sunshine lost speed again, letting herself fall back against the dragon's chin, just below the impending death of great, sharpened bone. She braced against the creature, feeling it push her through the air with tremendous force, just buying precious quarter seconds of time.
The dragon shook its head to dislodge the doomed pony, and Sunshine tumbled away from the beast, head over heels, falling into the wooded jungle below. Sunshine felt herself collide with something hard and her head rang like a large bell or shaken tin. She toppled through branches, spinning wildly about, legs kicking aimlessly. She landed on her side, heavily, knocking the wind out of her. She wasn't sure if anything was broken, but she didn't feel any pain and a darkness was closing in around her vision.
Sunshine lurched to her feet. She had to find cover somewhere. Fast. She ran forward, partially unable to remember what she was doing. Sunshine was on complete autopilot. Her body was in charge now, and her mind was checking out after that crash. She just kept moving. She had to get away. She had to live.
A darkness loomed over her. Sunshine looked up, and there it was: the dragon. It was looking at her, but she couldn't make shapes out too well. She was half blind from static in her eyes. She tried to motivate herself to run, and to run faster, but her heart just couldn't take anymore. Sunshine fell down. She stared up, looking certain death in the face as well as she could before the end. She might have liked to think up something witty so she'd have some poetic last words to go out on, but real life never worked that way. The teeth came.