Co-Written with stormypup
Disclaimer: All places and characters belong to JK Rowling and the WB and various publishers. We just take good care of their characters in the mean time. No money is being made off this piece of fiction.
A/N: This chapter is to everyone who reviewed the last chapter...all 27 of you. That's just...my mind is still numb from shock. I really hope this chapter lives up to your expectations.
Beta'd by NSW and Mystictwilight
Chapter Ten
The library was quiet and empty except for the one lone occupant. He sat in a niche in the far back of the library. His back was pressed against the cool stone of the castle wall, and his head tipped to the side as he gazed out across the deserted grounds. One leg was draped off the edge of the windowsill-cum-bench; the other one was bent at the knee.
Harry Potter exhaled softly, fogging the large window. The small, worn leather bound book he had brought with him lay forgotten on his lap. The pads of his fingers caressed the chilled glass as he watched a man cross the grounds at a fast pace. He'd recognize the lengthy frame swathed in black anywhere. Green eyes followed the dark man across the dead grass towards the lake.
The man shed his winter cloak and dropped it to the ground. Harry could see the man look about him before he swan dived into the semi-frozen water. He swallowed as he observed Snape tread the water with an easy grace undeterred by the cold.
Harry longed to be down there with him more than anything. There had been little hope of a positive answer when Snape had gone to ask permission for Harry to accompany him into the water, but even Harry hadn't anticipate the flat out rejection they received. It stung worse than the cold shoulder Ron had been giving him. He knew he was becoming obsessed, but he couldn't help it! Hermione kept looking at him with this deeply sympathetic look as if he were dying from some dreadful disease, and just once, he wished they'd go back to the way they were.
He let his forehead hit the window pane with a soft thud. His eyes remained glued to Snape's every move across the water. Why hadn't he dived under yet? He pulled back and swung his leg over the edge of the windowsill and jumped down to the floor. Forget Dumbledore, forget them all, he was going to go into that lake whether they liked it or not. If they weren't going to give him at least five good reasons not to, then he saw no reason why he shouldn't take matters into his own hands.
Mind made up, he stuffed the book into his book bag and slung it over his shoulder. He only hoped Snape would remain on the surface of the lake.
A gust of cold air slapped him in the face as he exited the castle. He quickly cast a warming charm on his cloak and bundled it around himself. February had been so ridiculously cold, but with little snow. Many of the castle's inhabitants had been grumbling about this for weeks now, but Harry was grateful. He hurried down towards the lake, hoping no one would see him.
He heard the soft splash of something cutting through the water of the lake and he grinned. Snape was still swimming on the surface. Harry's ridiculous smile refused to fade as he ran full tilt down the slope towards the water. He dropped his satchel on top of Snape's winter cloak, before racing to the water's edge.
There was Snape pacing the water, much like he paced the practice room while Harry went over his music diligently. It comforted him to see it in ways he couldn't explain.
"Snape!" he hollered, snickering when the man's head whipped in his direction and he lost momentum, momentarily dipping below the choppy surface.
Snape's head reappeared, this time much closer to the shore. When he emerged from the water, he was scowling angrily at Harry.
"What do you think you're doing?" Snape growled, using his wand to cast a see-me-not spell around them in case anyone happened to be looking out a window.
Harry's grin was unrepentant. "How do you do that? Come out of the water fully dressed and only a little wet?"
Snape blinked, caught off guard. A question about the state of his clothing was the last thing he expected. "It's a function of my kind, innate magic allowing us to come and go on land without dripping water everywhere. You didn't answer my question, Potter. Why are you here? You're not even wearing your blasted cloak!" he said, eyes scanning the distant castle.
Harry shrugged. "I was in the library and saw you here."
"So you chose to follow, despite the warnings of the Headmaster?" Snape said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "We must return to the castle," he said, making a grab for Harry.
"Why?" Harry side-stepped the attempted grab and looked up at Snape with a challenging stare.
"You can't be here," Snape growled. "The Headmaster has forbidden it. He's trying to protect you, you imbecile!"
"Why?" Harry snapped. "Why the hell does he get any say in this? It's not fair. All I want to do is see where you're happy, why the fuck is that such a huge deal?!"
"He's afraid if I take you down there, I will not bring you back!" Snape shouted. "Ever!"
Harry blinked. "Would you?" he asked, meeting Snape's angry glare.
"No," Snape snarled, turning on his heel and walking away, only to turn back after three steps. "But I could! If I so desired, I could lure you down with me, and you would never see the surface again!"
There was a loud silence between them as the words echoed around them. Harry exhaled shakily, looking out over the rough water, before looking back up at Snape. He took the extra two steps forward and placed his hand over Snape's clenched fist.
"Please, show me."
Snape wanted to show him his world, the world they could share if only...
"You must be certain?" he said, his voice cracking as he gripped Harry's shoulder tightly.
Harry nodded resolutely. "I am."
Snape glanced toward the castle and nodded, holding out his hand. When Harry took it, he began to murmur the incantation that would allow Harry to join him. He was intertwining his fate even more tightly with Harry, but he wanted to do it. The need to do so was almost overwhelming as the ancient magic settled around them.
Harry gasped at the curious sensation. It felt like a bucket of ice had been poured over his head. He looked up at Snape in curiosity. "What was that?"
"You'll be able to enter the water and have no need for air. This is only temporary" Snape emphasized. "Please do not ask me to make it permanent," he warned, looking intently at Harry.
"Wouldn't dream of it," Harry murmured, looking back out at the lake. He unclasped his school cloak with one hand and let it fall to the ground. The cold air returned with a vengeance and he took a step closer to the warm body beside him.
"You'll be warmer in the water," Snape told Harry as he shivered beside him. "It will be easier for me if I can change form once we're in the water. Will that bother you?" he asked, searching Harry's face.
Harry shook his head. He was curious to be certain, but he was so cold that even if it had mattered, he would have said no.
"Can we just go in now, please?" he begged, bouncing to keep warm. How long did it take to get frostbite again when it was below freezing?
Snape took a deep breath and nodded and began walking into the water. "Breathe normally. You'll have to fight your instincts, but I promise you'll be fine."
Harry really didn't like the sound of that and he gripped Snape's hand tighter than necessary. His heart was racing as the frigid water lapped at his pant covered legs. Why were they going so slow? This was miserable. If Snape was trying to prove a point, he didn't know what it was.
Finally they made it to where the land abruptly dropped off, without waiting for Snape's cue, Harry released the man's hand and dove under the surface, praying it would be warmer. He gasped, his mouth opened and flooded with cold water. Harry choked, grabbing at his throat as he clawed for something to propel him back up. Stupid! his mind screamed at him as he grabbed the nearest thing to him and that happened to be Snape's waist.
Snape cupped Harry's face, forcing him to look at him. "Breathe," Snape said, his voice sounding strangely harmonic under water. "You must breathe."
Harry gripped Snape's wrist in a frantic hold as he tried to inhale and exhale like normal. His eyes were wide and wet with tears that were indistinguishable in the aquatic habitation. It burned his chest as the water rapidly exited and entered his lungs. He closed his eyes, trying to block out the sight of the surrounding water and just focus on regulating himself. Snape's hand never left his cheek and he was so glad he didn't. He coughed a few times, choking up the remaining water. His body seized in the water with each hack.
"Don't fight it, Harry," Snape said soothingly, his thumb rubbing lightly across Harry's cheek. "That's it, just breathe. I won't let anything happen to you, just breathe," he crooned, ignoring the curious stares of of the Merpeople who had suddenly appeared.
Harry coughed a few more times, before going still. He inhaled once shaky and uncertain, before realizing he wasn't going to drown. His eyes opened slowly, his grip on Snape's wrist loosening but not letting go. He met Snape's concerned stare and felt his face flush with embarrassment.
Snape stroked his face one last time before taking Harry by the hand. "Can you see alright?" he asked curiously. He had never used the joining spell on anyone, and was curious as to how it was affecting Harry.
Harry looked about him and realized everything was blurred. He curiously took off his glasses, looked around him, and almost let go of them in shock. He could see, perfectly, in ways he couldn't even with his glasses on. He stared back at Snape in mild shock.
"Y-yeah, I can."
Snape couldn't help but smile as Harry looked around without his glasses, his face full of wonder. "I'm going to change now," he warned and Harry nodded, watching him curiously.
Snape closed his eyes and his body began to change. His clothing and skin seem to meld together as his lower half began to elongate. Harry watched in fascination as his chest became bare, and his legs took on the form of a serpent, his scales shimmering, even in the darkened water.
When the change was complete, he looked at Harry, expecting to see revulsion or horror on his face.
He hadn't expected the sheer fascination on the boy's face.
"Can I?" Harry asked, his hand already reaching for the scaly tail. He bowed his head in embarrassment, his hand falling back to his side.
Snape curled his tail upward, closer to Harry. The boy's head shot up to look at him, excitement shining in his eyes as he reached out a hand to caress him.
The scales were smooth and not at all slimy like he had expected them to be. He trailed his fingers up and down Snape's tail, enjoying the sensation and the way the sun bouncing off the water reflected on the deep green scales, turning them all different shades of green. He couldn't stop himself even if he wanted to.
"Beautiful," he whispered roughly, gazing back up at Snape in amazement. His face fell at Snape's shocked expression. He retracted his hand, hoping he hadn't overstepped his boundaries.
"Say that again."
"Say what?" Harry asked, his fingers already back at Snape's tail as if drawn there.
To say that Snape was stunned would have been an understatement. Never in his life had anything about him been deemed as beautiful. His hand once again cupped Harry's face, capturing his attention.
His gazed drifted from Harry's eyes to his lips, his thumb moving to caress his lower lip. There was nothing to stop him from tasting those lips, and Snape found himself being drawn forward. He hesitated a hair's breath away, giving Harry a chance to pull back. In that instant, Harry was suddenly yanked downward. Growling, Snape dove after him to find a Grindylow holding tightly to Harry's leg.
His tail lashed out, knocking the Grindylow sideways. Snape hissed at him, teeth bared causing the Grindylow to dive for the safety of the grass.
Harry gasped, his body trembling as Snape grabbed his shoulders. How could he have forgotten that they weren't alone? His pride was wounded. He should have been able to break the Grindylow's hold easily. He had been able to do it during the second task his fourth year; it should have been even easier now. His arms went around Snape's waist before he could think about it, and he clung. His fingers dug into Snape's back and he knew he'd be leaving little crescent shapes there from his nails.
The way Harry was clinging to him, Snape wondered if the boy were part Grindylow himself. He reached down to Harry's hand and gently opened his fingers. Harry was staring at him, a mixture of unease and embarrassment.
"I'll let no harm come to you," Snape promised, his voice like a low melody.
Harry nodded shakily. He knew it was true, but he had been so caught off guard, he had over-reacted.
"I'm alright," Harry assured him, his body relaxing.
Snape smiled reassuringly and held out his hand. Harry grasped it, grinning widely. "Hold tight," Snape warned, and the two shot off through the water, Snape's tail propelling them faster and faster.
Harry felt the desire to whoop out loud. Emotionally, it was much like the first time he rode his broomstick; scary and exhilarating. Physically, the sensations couldn't be more different.
The underwater world was full of colors and creatures he hadn't had time to notice his only other trip into the lake. His eyesight was stunningly sharp and he could make out the details of the smallest things. The way the light and shadow played across the surfaces of plants and animals dazzled him. At turns he wanted to go slower and faster, shallower and deeper. He wanted to feel it all.
Snape watched Harry from the corner of his eye, still in awe of Harry's reaction to everything. He now understood Dumbledore's fears that he would not bring Harry back. In that moment, he wasn't sure that he could let him go. Snape could feel the joy radiating from Harry, the excitement. Why should they return? He could make the joining spell permanent, keeping Harry there with him beneath the surface for the rest of their lives. Harry would adjust eventually, would stop pining for the life he left behind. He was so happy now. Why couldn't it be like this always?
A Merman appeared in their path, shocking Snape out of his thoughts as they came to a stop. The Merman looked between the two of them curiously. "I have seen this human before," he said, studying Harry. "You have taken him as your mate?" he asked, looking at Snape, a small smile upon his face.
Snape's face darkened as he scowled at the Merman and said something in a language Harry didn't recognize. The Merman's countenance changed in an instant. He said something angrily in return, motioning to Harry and pointing upwards. Snape snarled something back, and the man pointed to Harry once again, the tone of his voice chilling Harry to the bone. Snape said nothing, and the creature turned and swayed away, disappearing into the dark depths of the lake.
"What just happened?" Harry asked nervously. Was Snape in trouble for bringing him down here?
Snape was still staring after the Merman. "It's time to go back," he said, and began to propel them along before Harry could protest.
Harry tugged on his hand. "Wait! Damn it, stop!" he cried. Snape slowed, but didn't stop.
"What the hell just happened back there?" he asked, wondering what was said between the two that had made everything turn so ugly.
"It doesn't matter," Snape replied, sounding weary.
Harry looked at him, dumbfounded. "How can you say that?" he asked, feeling as though he had been cut to the core.
Snape looked at Harry, regret showing plainly in his eyes. "Dumbledore was right, I never should have allowed this to happen," he said, guiding them to the underground tunnel that lead to his chambers.
Snape returned to his human form in a matter of moments and the two stepped through a glowing greed curtain of light. One minute they were underwater, and with the next step they were in the dry tunnel. The only evidence of their swim was a dampness around the cuffs of their pants.
Harry ripped his hand out of Snape's hold with an angry scowl. "What the hell?"
Snape began walking, unable to look at Harry. "Cadmus merely reminded me what a fine line I was walking," he said, unable to tell Harry what he had been thinking while they were swimming together. That he had nearly convinced himself that keeping Harry down there with him would be alright. That they would both be happy there.
"Fine line," Harry muttered under his breath in confusion. He chased after Snape and grabbed his wrist forcing him to stop. "Explain."
"Are you so thick you can't figure it out on your own, Potter?" Snape sneered, pulling from Harry's grasp. He needed Harry to leave so he could think straight. He stalked down the tunnel, robes billowing around him until he reach the door that lead back to the castle. "I will teach you to play, and then you will go away, is that understood?" he said, feeling as if a piece of his soul being being shattered.
"Yes, sir." Harry nodded stiffly and brushed by Snape at a hurried pace. His footsteps echoing about the tunnel as he went.
Snape leaned against the wall and slid to the floor, burying his face in his hands, cursing angrily into his palms. All of his instincts screamed at him to chase Harry down, mark him and make him his own. Take him to the water and never return.
Instead, he sat on the cold stone floor, wondering how he was going to survive this. As things stood, he didn't think that he would.
Harry was beyond pissed as he marched up the stairs from the dungeons back into the main part of the castle. Just who did Snape think he was? He couldn't just turn on him like that. He hadn't even done anything this time! Harry wanted to hit something or hex someone, it didn't matter, he wanted to cause hurt in the worst way.
His saving grace was the violin tucked away in his trunk in his room, at least he knew his playing wouldn't enthrall anyone or cause heartbreak. Tears pricked the corner of his eyes, but they never fell.
"Snorkleback Humptydink," he said, voice flat. The Fat Lady finally looked at him and of course it was in concern. He glared at her and she swung open with a sniff. Harry stepped through the portrait hole into the crowded common room.
Hermione looked up from her notes with a happy smile. "Harry, there you are!"
"Where else would I be," he sneered. He stalked past her ignoring the concerned calls after him as he stormed up the stairs to the 7th year boys dorm. They knew better than to follow him. He snarled and shut the door behind him with a bang.
His hand lingered on the doorknob and he hit his head against the heavy wood door, his eyes wandering over the empty room. Harry crossed the floor and dropped to his knees before his trunk. He flicked the latches and the lid popped open revealing the contents within. His violin rested in its case untouched since his last encounter with Snape. Opening the case, he picked it up with reverence. Anger still coursed through him unyielding in its need to destroy something.
Harry took up the bow and without thought struck a harsh chord. The discordant sound bounced around the room and died. His breathing became uneven and he squeezed his eyes shut, and, not even realizing he was doing so, started to play the song he had heard in the dungeons during break.
He collapsed to his knees, unaware of his surroundings, too caught up in his emotions and the need to purge them all until he was numb. He was sick of this roller coaster, sick of the games, sick of not knowing if what he was doing was right or not. He just wanted answers. He choked and his hand jerked, sending his bow flying across the room. It skittered across the floor and wound up under Ron's bed.
The violin fell from his fingers and clattered onto the floor. He stayed there frozen as he met Dumbledore's disappointed stare. Harry's eyes flicked over towards the door, but it was shut. How long had the headmaster been sitting there observing him? How much of his breakdown had he seen?
Harry stood, eyeing the old man warily. On Dumbledore's lap sat Harry's folded cloak and his book bag rested beside him.
"Hello Harry," Dumbledore said calmly. "The song was beautiful, if not heartbreakingly sad," he said, smiling softly. "I found your items by the lake, and I thought you might be needing them."
Harry stepped forward and took the offered cloak and held it in a protective manner to his chest. "Thank you, sir," he mumbled, head bowed.
"I take it you ventured in to the lake?" Dumbledore asked evenly.
Harry lifted his head, his earlier irritation returning slowly. "Yes."
Dumbledore looked at Harry, meeting his defiant stare. "You are of age and can make your own decisions, Harry, but as Headmaster of this school, it is my job to protect you. If need be, I can and will forbid you to see Professor Snape outside of your lessons. Do I need to do so?"
"You couldn't!" Harry cried, almost dropping his winter cloak in shock.
"I do not wish to do so," Dumbledore said, smiling sadly. "But you are my responsibility as long as you are a student at Hogwarts."
"But, you aren't going to, are you?" he asked, panicked. "Are you?"
"Harry, I cannot forbid you to see him altogether, I can only limit your contact to potions class and your music lessons. I hadn't realized that you this would go this far. I let your prior animosity with Professor Snape cloud my judgment, and for that, I am sorry."
Harry winced and looked back down at the floor, before tipping his head back and scanning the low ceiling as if it would give him any answers. The restrictions weren't that great, as a matter of fact they wouldn't change his pattern much at all, so then why did it still irk him?
"Is that all, sir?" he asked, finding no other words.
"No, there is one more thing, Harry, and this is not negotiable. You will stay away from the lake, and under no circumstances are you allowed to go anywhere near it with Professor Snape. Is that understood?" Dumbledore asked, and Harry noticed an edge to the Headmaster's voice, one he hadn't heard since the war.
"Yes, sir," he responded, rubbing his eyes tiredly.
Dumbledore smiled and got to his feet. Harry couldn't help but notice that Dumbledore was moving slower, as if his age was finally catching up to him. "Then I shall be on my way," he said, smiling at Harry, his blue eyes a bit more dull than usual. "Good night, Harry. Sleep well."
"Goodnight, Professor."
Harry waited until the man had exited the door and shut it behind him, before turning back to his bed. He growled, picked his bag up off the bed, and then chucked it across the room violently, not even satisfied when parchment exploded out of it, littering the floor.