Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns. I have nothing to do with the original Twilight. This plot however, is mine. Edward . . . . is not :(
I know it's been forever since I've updated on this story. Let the flogging commence. Again, I don't know when I'll get the chance to update again as I'm not on my computer at the moment. People fixing it are taking their sweet time no matter how much I hassle them. Not sure how the reception of this chapter will go but I like it. Let's just say, there's some self discovery in there.
I hope it was – even partially – worth the wait.
13th October 2009
Bella
For some reason, having Edward's friend James from Chicago here made me feel uneasy. I wasn't one hundred per cent sure why but there was a lingering feeling that he knew some of the things that we had done to Edward before he left.
And that didn't make me feel good at all.
Here we were, trying to make amends with Edward and his friend shows up out of nowhere. Yeah, I know it's bad to me to dislike the idea that he had friends in Chicago but there was also the fact that Edward had asked 'where are the others?' That made me a little uncomfortable. Would his girlfriend be here too?
Another little thing that I'd noticed, maybe the others hadn't or maybe they had, I don't know, was James's expression when Edward had said my name. It was a kind of 'what the fuck are you doing hanging around with that bitch?' expression and I hated it.
It confirmed what I had been suspicious of.
I couldn't blame Edward. Not really. I mean, I had been an absolute bitch to him before he left. I wondered how much he had told them about what we did to him. Did he tell them about the locker incident?
Thinking about how he still couldn't go into enclosed spaces made me sad and I was even more determined to help him now that I knew there were lasting effects. Hell, I knew that we shouldn't have done any of those things to him in the first place but it was too late to go back now, huh?
What they say is true. Hindsight is a bitch.
"Bells?" I turned to look at Alice, who was watching me carefully. "Are you okay?" She glanced at where Edward and James had flopped down on the grass and were now laughing and joking around. He seemed so carefree now that his friend was here. Would he ever be that way around me? I didn't ever expect him to be but maybe it was okay to hope. Right?
"Yeah," I nodded and she narrowed her eyes at me, clearly not believing me for a second. "I'm good. James showing up was just a bit of a shock, that's all."
"You weren't the only one taken by surprise." Jasper laughed, shaking his head.
I smiled slightly, remembering the look of shock on Edward's face as James had ploughed into him. I had looked over just in time to see James running at Edward full speed. Unfortunately, I didn't have time to yell out to him before he made contact. Not that it would have made any difference seeing as Edward flipped him over his shoulder with ease. That martial arts training had come in useful then. From the looks of things, James had joined Edward in his classes, considering he managed to get up again immediately afterwards. I was sure that throw must have hurt but James laughed it off.
"What are you three doing all the way over there?" We all looked over to see James facing us, grinning as though he'd been given a new toy to play with. "I ain't gonna bite ya!"
"Wouldn't hold him to that." Edward shouted over him and we all laughed, making our way over to the duo.
"Shut it, prick!" James elbowed him, making Edward laugh even harder. "I don't bite."
"Much." Edward muttered as we sat down but the slight gleam in his eye told me he was only joking.
"So . . ." James looked at the three of us as though deciding who to start with. "You're obviously Jasper," he nodded, grinning back at the new blonde, "you're Alice," she giggled and nodded quickly, seeming to bounce up and down where she was sitting. I shook my head, snickering at her enthusiasm. You would have thought I'd be used to it by now. "And you must be Bella." He looked at me, something else in his eye. He glanced at Edward, who gave him what I could only guess was a warning glare as if he was trying to urge him not to get into something. I wasn't going to ask. Purely because I didn't think I'd like the answer. "Just double checking. You know, the girls are going to hate it here and Seattle to be fair."
"Why do you say that?" I asked, curious.
"Because it's so damn humid here. It's like it's always about to rain or some shit." He grumbled, clearly not used to the weather of the Olympic Peninsula.
"That's because it is." I offered and he looked at me as if to ask 'are you serious?' I shrugged, not really knowing what else to say. "I can bet that by the time you get back to Seattle, it'll either have rained or be raining."
"What'll you bet?" He grinned wickedly and I heard Edward let out a chuckle.
"What you got?" I challenged and he rubbed his hands together, clearly picking up the gauntlet.
"Hmm . . . I like this one, Eddie," he laughed and Edward shook his head.
"Don't let Vic hear you say that." He laughed, leaning back on his hands and stretching out his legs in front of him. It still amazed me how graceful he'd become since he left. Before he moved, he was one of the most uncoordinated people I knew. It was as though he couldn't walk in a straight line without tripping over something, whether there was anything there or not. He kind of reminded me of Bambi trying to walk on the ice. But now he was graceful, able to do whatever he wanted and look gorgeous doing it. He had turned from the stumbling fawn into a graceful mountain lion and I couldn't say I was complaining. "And don't call me Eddie, fucker."
"Alright, alright, don't get your panties in a twist." He held up his hands in defeat as Edward rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath. "Well Bella, hmmm . . . how about . . . if you're right and it does rain before I leave . . . you can have my iPod."
"Wow." Edward muttered, a look of shock on his face. "Never did I ever think I'd hear those words come out of your mouth. You don't even let Vic borrow your iPod."
"That's 'cause she breaks shit." He shrugged before turning back to me. "So, we got a deal?"
"Depends on what I have to give you if you win." I raised an eyebrow and he smirked.
"Well, you have to give me yours, of course." He shrugged as though it was the simplest thing in the world.
"Of course." I rolled my eyes and everyone laughed. I glanced at Edward, who seemed to be really relaxed and at ease with the idea of us from Forks socialising with his best friend from Chicago. I guess he realised that James would be able to make the decision for himself about whether we were trustworthy or not. I hoped he thought we were. "Alright." I stuck my hand out and he grasped it. "Deal."
"Dude, you're so gonna lose." Edward snickered and the other three nodded. "I'd say goodbye to your iPod, man. Better yet, might as well hand it over now."
"Why do you say that?" He looked at Edward as though he was betrayed at the thought Edward could side with me over him. He clearly hadn't researched the weather in Washington before coming out here.
"Because you see those?" Edward pointed upwards before standing up. We all looked up towards the sky as James nodded. "Those are rain clouds. And it looks like they're gonna let loose sometime pretty soon. Come on, let's go to mine. My mom'll kill me if I tell her you were here and didn't bring you to see her."
"Yeah, Esme cooking!" He jumped up and ran towards the diner parking lot, looking like a little kid on a sugar high. "Come on, then!"
"Is he always like this?" I asked, falling into step next to Edward and he laughed, nodding. "Wow."
"You're used to Alice, how's this shocking?" He asked and I couldn't fault his logic. The pixie was incredibly hyper.
"I heard that!" She hollered from behind us and I had to laugh when Edward replied with 'you were supposed to'. She didn't have a response for that.
"You wanna ride with us or follow?" Edward asked, seeing James leaning up against what I guess was a rental.
"I'll follow." He shrugged, unlocking the drivers' side door and climbing halfway in. "Means you don't have to bring me back here later."
"You two coming?" He asked Alice and Jasper who had been quiet since we got back to the parking lot. Alice beamed at the invitation and nodded quickly, making all of us laugh. They made their way to Alice's bright yellow Porsche and slid in, waiting for Edward and I to lead the way. "How come they always use Alice's car?" He asked, sounding a little confused.
"Because Jasper's doesn't run." I laughed and he raised an eyebrow, clearly wanting an elaboration. "It's this 1967 Ford Mustang that he got for like five hundred dollars because it was literally falling apart. He's been fixing it up for about eighteen months now. It looks great. He's got all the bodywork and interior and stuff done but it just doesn't run."
"Engine overhaul?" He asked and I shrugged, not knowing what that meant. "It basically needs a new engine, yes?" I nodded and he laughed, shaking his head.
"So . . . how did you and James meet?" I asked, glancing at him quickly before looking back out the window.
"He was the first friend I made in Chicago." He chuckled, shaking his head as he made the turn off onto the enormous driveway that lead up to his house. "Everyone else had been watching me and you could tell they were wondering whether or not they should approach the new kid but James didn't give a fuck. He just walked up to me in second period and introduced himself without question. He cornered me just before lunch and practically dragged me to his table which, incidentally was filled with people I'd met briefly in all my other classes. They've been my best friends ever since." I couldn't help but smile at the short story. It was nice that he'd been able to make friends so quickly there, especially when he'd been the social outcast here in Forks. "I know what you're thinking. The fact that I made friends my first day in Chicago yet I hadn't made any here in Forks." I nodded silently, finding it a little eerie that he seemed to be able to read my mind like that. Or maybe I was just obvious. "Well, part of it might have been the fact that I'd replaced my glasses with contact lenses and my mom had given me this scrub thing to help clear up my skin."
"Wow," I chuckled, shaking my head before looking at him. He had a small smile on his face so I guessed he knew I wasn't laughing at him. "You actually used a facial scrub."
"Yup." He nodded, turning off the engine and I realised we were sat outside his house. "It hurt like a bitch the first few uses but it cleared up my skin pretty quickly. It was definitely worth it."
"I can't imagine that's the only reason they became your friends." I sighed, looking away from him.
"Maybe it was the fact that I could help them with their homework when they needed it." He chuckled, climbing out of the car.
"Something tells me it's more than that." I said softly and he gave me a strange look. One I couldn't but my finger on. "You're a really great guy, Edward." It was a lame compliment but he'd get what I was trying to say, right? I hoped so.
"Then how come no one here could see that?" He asked softly, probably not intending for me to hear it. Unfortunately, I did and it made me sad to think he didn't really have any good memories of being here in Forks before he moved. I hoped he had a couple since he got back. "Come on, James'll be itching to see my mom. He loves her."
"Who doesn't love Esme?" I laughed and he shrugged, walking up to the door where James, Alice and Jasper were waiting for us. James was standing there doing a very good imitation of Alice as he stood there bouncing up and down, a look of glee on his face.
"Come on, Eddie." He grinned, laughing as Edward rolled his eyes and grumbled about not being called Eddie. He shoved the key in the lock, opening the door before being shoved out the way by James. All of us laughed at his enthusiasm. "Oh, Esme, I'm home!" We laughed again as Esme appeared, looking confused as she wiped her hands on a towel.
"James Hill!" She cried, her arms opening as she embracing him, laughing enthusiastically.
"Look what I found." Edward grinned leaning against the doorframe as he watched the interaction between his mother and his best friend.
"Oh, how I've missed you, you insane rascal." She laughed and he made a dramatic show of taking a bow, which again, made everyone laugh.
I guess I'd misjudged James. He wasn't someone that seemed to judge people too quickly, but then again, there was a huge chance that Edward had told him what we'd done to him here in Forks and he was just ignoring it until later. Or until the rest of his friends arrived.
Now that would be fun.
"So, where's Mr. C?" He asked, looking around expectantly.
"Well, the last I saw him, he was sitting in his office, shovelling mom's lunch into his mouth." Edward laughed and his mom rolled her eyes, smiling at his words. "I've even got picture proof."
"And a threat to his life to go with it." I laughed as he nodded, grinning at his mom.
Seeing Edward around James, he was like a completely different person. With us, there were still walls, as we all expected there to be but with James here, it was like all the barriers Edward had put up since he got back to Forks just crumbled. I wish I knew how to get him to do that. Maybe someday, I could.
I wasn't holding out much hope though.
"Hey, Bella." Alice made her way over to me, smiling slightly. "Can you show me where the bathroom is? I know you've been staying here for the project and I don't want to ask Esme or Edward. Tell me something more embarrassing." She laughed and I shook my head, laughing along with her.
"Come on." I led her up the stairs towards the guest bedroom and the en suite I used in the morning.
"So . . ." She hedged as she opened the door and walked back out into the guest room. "How are things between you and Edward? They seem better."
"Well, I'm not entirely sure." I sighed, sitting down on the bed, running my hands through my hair. "I mean, I think that we're doing okay and that I could someday be someone he might trust and then James turns up and I see what he's like when he's completely relaxed. I now know that I'm way off course."
"We did some fucked up stuff to him, Bells." She sighed and I nodded, closing my eyes. "He's not going to let that go anytime soon."
"I know." And I did know. The revelation from earlier about his inability to go into enclosed spaces because it caused him to remember being shut in the locker sprang to the forefront of my mind. That was something I wouldn't be sharing with Alice. Edward had told me that in confidence and I didn't want to betray his trust. "Hey, what are you doing tomorrow?"
"Nothing that I know of. What were you thinking?" Her face brightened at the idea of some girl time. We hadn't really spent that much time together over the last few weeks. I missed my pixie time.
"Well, Edward's tutoring Brittany for a couple of hours tomorrow," clearly she picked up the sour tone in my voice and giggled. I shot her a dirty look in response and she held up her hands, still smirking yet clearly not going to comment just yet. And I say 'yet' because she will. No doubt she will. "I was wondering if you wanted to hang out for a little while."
"You wanna go shopping?" She asked, grinning at me like the little idiot she was.
"No, no shopping." I whined and she scowled at me. I grinned at her to let her know I was only joking but clearly stating I did not want to go shopping any time soon. "But we could either hang at one of our houses or go for coffee."
"Or do both." She agreed and I nodded. "What time's he tutoring?"
"From about eleven, I think." I couldn't remember exactly. "Not sure what time he'll finish. Doesn't matter, does it?" She shook her head, beaming at me. "Come on, let's go before they send a search party."
As we made our way back downstairs, I could hear Edward laughing loudly and I saw why when I saw James dancing around the lounge like a chicken. Or was it a monkey? Maybe it was a mixture of the both of them. Either way, he looked like an idiot. And he didn't give a shit.
I saw Esme sitting on the couch, mug in her hand, wiping at her eyes, her cheeks slightly red from where she had been laughing so much. I don't think I'd seen her let go like that before. It was strange, seeing refined and dignified Esme Cullen giggling like a school girl. Definitely one for the memory bank.
"And Jane just let him get away with that?" Edward managed to choke out, shaking his head at his friend.
"Not a chance." James laughed, flopping on his ass on the thick faux fur rug the Cullen's had in front of the coffee table. He crossed his arms, resting his chin on them on the coffee table, a grin plastered on his face. "She made Dem pay for that shit."
"Do I want to know?" He asked, though the look in his eyes said that certainly, yes he did want to know. If I didn't know better, I knew Edward would use the information against this 'Dem' in the future when it would be beneficial to him. Even his short time back in Forks told me that he could retain information for a long time.
"Oh yeah." He laughed, pulling out his phone. "I don't have to tell you. I can show you." He waved his phone next to his head in a 'just wait and see' style.
Edward moved off the sofa and made his way over to James. He glanced over my way as he went a smirked. "Hey, Bella. Didn't realise you were there." I waved him off in a nonchalant way. Some part of me realised that I was becoming aware of Edward's every movement, that something about him seemed to call out to me. It sounded stupid and like something out of some shitty love film Alice always raves about but it was as though my body was aware of him at all times. I glanced at James to see him staring at me. The look in his eyes wasn't the same one he'd had only moments ago. It was cold and hard and I knew that without a doubt, he knew who I was to Edward. Or at least, who I had been to Edward.
He grin that spread over his face as the sounds of a video was incredible. It was as though there was something there, some kind of light that hadn't been there before was shining through him. I knew that it was because one of his best friends was sitting there, knowing him a video of another good friend. Probably making an ass out of himself but that's not the point.
"Oh, man, you've got to YouTube that shit." He laughed as he passed the phone back to James.
"Already done, my friend." James replied, pride in his voice as he slipped his phone back in his pocket. "Already done. And it seems our boy is quite popular." Edward raised an eyebrow and I couldn't help but wonder what was going through his head. "Seven hundred thousand hits." That set off another round of laughter from Edward as James got up to show Esme the video. Again, she erupted into a fit of giggles at the actual visualisation of the story James had told.
"Hey, I'm going to head off." Alice said quietly and everyone bade her goodbye as I walked her to the door. "You okay?" She asked, her eyes full of concern.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I shrugged and I knew she didn't believe me. "I don't know. I just wonder . . . will he ever be like that here?" She shook her head, confused. "Look at him. He hasn't laughed like that since he's been back and I wonder if he ever will without his friends from Chicago here."
"I don't know, Bells." She sighed, walking through the door. I followed her out to her car, leaning against it as she opened the door, watching me carefully. "You're falling, aren't you?"
I looked up at her, unable to keep my expression blank. Even if I'd tried, Alice would have seen straight through it. For all the 'friends' I had at school, Alice was the only one that actually knew me. She knew everything about me and could tell when I wasn't being honest. Even with myself.
"Yeah." I whispered, looking down at the ground as I scuffed the dirt with the toe of my shoe. "And I don't know what to do about it."
"Well . . . it seems that the only thing you can do is let it happen. If you're honest with yourself and him, there's nothing he can do to call you out." She sounded like there was something else behind that statement.
"What? You think that he's been looking for something he can throw back at me?" I asked her and she shrugged. Would he do something like that? When I thought about it, after everything we put him through before he left, it wouldn't really surprise me. I think I would too.
"I don't know." She replied cryptically. "You never know. But if you're honest, there's nothing he can do, right?" She had a point. "I'll see you at school." I nodded, moving away from the car and watching her pull out down the driveway.
Closing the door softly behind me, I saw Edward in the kitchen, pouring himself some soda. I moved into the kitchen to join him, my throat suddenly dry.
"Everything alright?" He asked, glancing up at me. He sounded concerned but after what Alice had said outside, I wondered if he wasn't just a really good actor.
"Yeah." I smiled slightly at him. "Alice just had something she needed to talk to me about."
"Fair enough." He shrugged, putting the bottle of soda back into the fridge. He turned to face me, his brow furrowing slightly as he stood there. "Everything alright?"
I shook my head, trying to clear it before giving him a small smile. "Yeah," I could see he didn't believe me. "I've just got something on my mind, that's all."
"You sure?" He asked and I nodded again, praying he would drop it. "Alright. I didn't imagine myself ever saying this but . . . you need someone to talk to, I'm here. You know that, right?"
Did I?
"Thank you."
"No problem." He gave me a smile before making his way out into the living room again.
I grabbed a book from my school bag and made my way into the den, wanting to be alone for a little while. Opening it to where I left off, I tried to lose myself in the imaginary world of the characters written on that pages in front of me. What I'd read of the book so far was really good and I really wanted to be able to finish it soon.
Unfortunately, that didn't seem to be happening for me tonight.
After reading the same paragraph about six times, I gave up with a sigh and closed the book, deciding to try and sort through everything in my head.
Was Alice right?
Was I falling for Edward?
If you'd told me that at the beginning of the school year, I would have slapped you and laughed in your face. But now . . . now I wasn't so sure. Was it possible to fall for someone after such a short amount of time? I mean, my mom and dad got married after they'd only been together for four months. And they were still together now. I guess it's possible, right?
I didn't know what to think.
"Knock knock." I was startled out of my thoughts by someone standing at the door. I turned to see James standing there, a wry smile on his face. "Something serious going on inside your head, yeah?" I nodded, letting out a small breath. "Well, I'm heading off and I just wanted to say it was nice to meet you." He stepped into the room and I wondered what else was going through his mind. He stopped just in front of me, looking down at me.
"Something else?" I asked, raising an eyebrow at him and he laughed.
"You know, I couldn't believe it when Eddie told me that he had to work on a project with you. But part of me did and part of me worried." I looked away from him, knowing where this was going. "Part of me worried that when he moved back to this tiny little town, he would turn into who he was when he first moved to Chicago. You see, we all love Eddie. We love who he became when he was in Chicago. When he first moved there, he was quiet and didn't really trust people. It didn't take him long to admit that he had been the school geek back here but it took him four months to open up about some of the things you assholes did to him. He hasn't gotten over it and I'm not sure he ever will." As fun loving and carefree as this guy seemed, he could sure scare the shit out of someone when he wanted to. "Now, I don't usually make it a habit to threaten girls, but you . . . you're one of a kind, so I'll make an exception here. Do not fuck with Edward. You and your bitch friends have done enough to him and if I hear that you've hurt him again in any way, it won't just be me that you have to answer to. I don't hit girls, but there are plenty of girls I know that would gladly beat you to a pulp if you hurt him again." He moved away, glancing back as if to make sure I'd understood.
I had. I'd understood loud and clear.
Edward had friends that were willing to defend him. Friends that would do anything for him.
For some reason, that revelation made me analyse the relationships I had with my friends. It didn't take me long to actually realise that apart from Alice and Jasper, I didn't really have any friends. They all just hung around me because of the 'popular' status it gave them.
I didn't really have anyone that I could rely on like Edward did. He might have felt alone – scratch that been alone – while he lived here, but in some ways, it seemed like that might have been better to me. At least he knew where he stood with everyone. Sure, he would have been lonely and hurt, but maybe that would have been better than being in constant limbo all the time. But then again, I have no idea what it was like to be completely alone. I've always been surrounded by people my whole life. Even if I didn't necessarily want to be.
I didn't want to be that person anymore. I didn't want to be the person everyone floods to but doesn't actually like. I wanted real friends. More people like Alice to be there for me. People who actually cared what I thought about something, that cared about what I cared about.
I didn't want pseudo friends who couldn't give a shit.
I wanted to change.
"Hey," I looked over to the door to see Edward standing there, a look of concern on his beautiful face. "Everything okay?" I nodded, giving him a small smile. "Really?" He walked into the room and knelt down in front of me. He lifted his hand and wiped a thumb gently across my cheek, under my eye, pulling it away. I was surprised to see moisture on the pad of his thumb. I didn't even realise I was crying. "What's the matter?"
"Nothing." I sighed, shaking my head butt he way he raised his eyebrow told me he wasn't going to let it go. "It's nothing, really."
"It's enough to make you cry." He said, his voice so soft that in that moment, I knew he was being genuine. All thoughts of the possibility of him setting me up for the fall I so deserved went out of the window.
"It's just . . . seeing you with James . . . it, um . . ." I could see he was confused, wondering what the hell his friend had anything to do with me crying. "It made me realise . . ."
"Realise what?" He pushed gently and I let out a breath, wiping the tears I now knew were falling. "Hey, made you realise what?"
"That I don't actually have any friends." I whispered and he sat back on his heels, looking extremely confused.
"Of course you do." He shook his head, running a hand through his hair. "What about everyone at school?"
"Oh please." I choked out a laugh, actually finding it funny that he would assume that any of that lot gave a crap about me. "They're not my friends. They're only there because they believe that with me they're popular. That people will magically like them if they're seen with me. They don't give a shit about me. None of them actually know me. The only one who does is Alice."
"Well, if that's the case, aren't you better off being rid of them?" He asked, shifting to sit Indian style in front of me and I sighed.
"Yeah, I guess so. It's just . . . it would have been nice to realise that I had more than one friend here in this town. I mean, I've lived here my whole life and . . . I don't know." I looked down at my hands, playing with a loose thread on my shirt.
"You have more than one friend, Bella." I raised an eyebrow at him, wondering what the hell he was talking about. "Jasper?"
"Well, yeah, but I think he just comes as a package with Alice." He laughed, nodding, knowing that Jasper wouldn't go against Alice on anything. The boy was whipped and Alice knew it. Hell, I think he knew it.
"And . . . me." His voice was so soft I barely caught it. I looked at him slowly, wondering what he was talking about. Clearly he saw my confused and sighed, running his hand through his hair again. "Shocking, right?" I nodded and he let out a laugh. "I'll admit, when this project first started, I hated you." Ouch, go for the jugular, why don't you? "But . . . over the last couple of weeks, I'll admit, you've changed Bella. You've changed from being someone who cared only about appearances and being on top to someone that that shit doesn't really matter to anymore. I mean, before I left, all you cared about – or at least, all it seemed you cared about – was making me miserable. But now, you don't seem to have that one track mind anymore."
"What do you mean?" I asked, confused.
"Let me put it this way." He rested his elbows on his knees. "If you were the same person you were before I left, when I told you about tutoring Brittany, you would have probably done everything you could to make her miserable, right? Though I'm not sure why." He really sounded confused about that. Was it any wonder? I wasn't exactly being clear with how I felt. "But now, yeah you made a few cracks and remarks about her but for the most part, you left it alone. That indicates change, Bella. And maybe that's why the assholes at school are so bent out of shape. "You're changing who you are and they don't like it." He had a point and I couldn't help but watch him as he lithely stood up. He stopped as he reached the door, turning to look at me again. "As long as you don't change for anyone but yourself."
I thought about that as he left the room. I didn't want to change for anyone but myself. I knew that it was Edward that instigated the change, but I realised now that because of him I had realised I wasn't happy with who I was as a person.
He had started it off, but I wanted to be a better person because of myself.
And the first thing I had to do was try and make things up to Edward. And I think I had a pretty good idea where to start.
I made my way downstairs, looking for Esme. I knew that she hadn't gone to bed, seeing as she had to pass the den to get up the stairs. I found her curled up, watching something on TV. She smiled at me as I walked into the room, holding my breath as she watched me.
"Everything okay, honey?" Her tone was as sweet and kind as ever and it made me feel like even more of a bitch than normal.
"Yeah, everything's fine." I sat down on the end of the sofa as she watched me. "I was just wondering if I could borrow your laptop. Mine's dead and Alice has the charger for it. I know Edward's probably using his."
"Of course you can dear." She smiled at me before leaning over and pulling it out from the shelf under the coffee table. "Let me just start it up for you."
"Thank you." I said softly as she entered the password and handed the computer to me. I moved to the armchair, tucking my feet up underneath me as I opened an internet browser. I could feel her eyes on me as I opened up Google and typed in what I needed.
I didn't personally have a hand in this particular act of cruelty but I still felt like I was responsible somehow. It had been my 'friends' that had done it to him and I couldn't really get over that.
I knew it was going to be a long road to walk down, but hopefully, this first step was in the right direction.