Disclaimer: Don't own anything but the storyline thingy. '6 Months' by Hey Monday (Best song ever)

Chapter 10: I Can't Feel a Thing Without You Around

So please, give me your hands
So please, give me a lesson on how to steal, steal the heart
As fast as you stole mine, as you stole mine
But I'm okay
And I can't think of anybody else

Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you.

Edward was... confusing at best.

I did not understand him. I thought normal boys were hard enough to understand. But then again, Edward obviously wasn't normal. I could not even being comprehend what was running through his head; even though I could hear every strange, confusing and random thought in his mind.

Who am I kidding. It's not like he has even talked to me.

It was three weeks since the accident. Enough time for me to fall into a healthy schedule, enough time for me to form stable relationships- I actually made friends; enough time for me to learn names and faces; and enough time for me to become frustrated with the whole Cullen family.

I think at some point I resolved to confront him; well confront his family anyway. Well, confront Alice. Maybe. But I found that over the week my resolve faltered. After the accident Charlie refused to let me go to school for the remainder of the week. Maybe he felt guilty about leaving me with a 'baby sitter' -aka Jacob. As the days progressed I couldn't get anywhere near the Cullens.

Correction, I could not get anywhere near Edward. No, its not becuase he had bodyguards, it was because he was not at school at all! He had disappeared off the face of the planet. Sure I still heard him in my mind, muttering about the weather and sometimes about Rosalie, but it was like when I was in Phoenix... It was distant and faint.

I never saw him at school either, which cemented in my mind that he was at least out of state. It wasn't just him either, Rosalie wasn't at school. Perhaps I had actually done so permanent damage to her when I had rammed her with my sturdy car. I doubted it.

I couldn't keep out the sneaking suspicion that it was my fault. I mean come on, I hit his sister with a fricken car! I doubt that Edward would just waltz up to me and ask about the weather. He hadn't even been introduced to me.

By the next week I had almost given up all hope of seeing him. There was however, a defining moment when I realized how lame I truly was. It was about half way through the week when I sat down at the cafeteria with Jess and Mike.

I automatically looked up towards the Cullen's table. I swear, no one else ever sat there! It was almost as if it were reserved exclusivity for them.

Of course Edward and Rosalie weren't there but it was occupied as always by the rest of his family. Occasionally I would catch Alice staring at me across the cafeteria a look of almost longing and sympathy on her face. It was like she wanted to talk to me, like she was straining and fighting against herself. Or maybe that was just my Edward-deprived mind talking. The rest of the Cullens had been pointed out to me by the Gossip Queen herself, Jessica; there was Jasper and Emmett. Emmett was the bigger of the two with his dark curly hair. Jasper looked like he was smelling something unsavory. All the time.

Edward hadn't been there at school all week, I should be glad that although he was in my head, I seen him for days, I mean he was totally rude to me (in his mind that is). But for some reason I felt strangely depressed. It was ridiculous.

But no. I heard nothing about were he was. There were no rumors, no gossip and definitely no answers. Zip. Nadda. Zero.

I guess, for my visual fix, I would have to be content with my dreams.

Yes, I didn't stop dreaming about him (God, did that sound pathetic or what?!).

Don't get me wrong, its not like I missed hearing his voice all the time. No, I would never miss it. I could deal with only hearing it once or twice a day. Someone like me would never sit up at night waiting. No becuase that would be pathetic and lame. I didn't hope for him to appear, in my mind or at school everyday.

Who was a kidding.

I was pathetic. I really did sit in bed waiting. I waited for sleep to take me. This was the only way that I could see him now. Through my dreams. Most of them were fairly plain.

On the first night I saw him on a plane staring out a window. Not moving just staring. His bronze hair had flopped into his eyes and his brow was furrowed in concentration. I wanted to reach over and smooth out those lines. And before I knew it I had woken up. Funn.

It was like I had lost a limb. I was so used to hearing his voice almost all the time, I had become almost reliant on hearing Edwards voice. It let me detach myself from the world and ignore the build up of bullshit in my life. I remember in Phoenix how his voice used to calm me. Now I am not satisfied with just a few sentences a day.

I was sitting down looking at the Cullens when next to me Jess sighed and rolled her eyes at me.

"Bella, he's not here today,"

I whipped my head around shocked.

"W-What?" I stammered.

Mike looked up from his burger and attempted to express his confusion at Jess's words through a mouthful of food.

"Oh you know what I am talking about," Jess her voice laced with fake sweetness "But don't you worry yourself Bella, we have all thought about him at some point or another. But I assure you, that you are nothing to him. I bet he doesn't even know that there is a new student at the school,"

I stared at her shocked. She had never been so... bitchy. I suspected it was a case of sour grapes.

Mike had finally been able to swallow and now probed Jess and I with questions.

"Who were you talking about? Who doesn't know about Bella? Who is nothing? Bella? Jess?" he said sounding like a five year old. Cute but sometimes so, so very annoying.

"Nothing Mike," I muttered under my breath

"Yes Mike, its nothing. And will always be nothing. Bella, I see you looking everyday, and I'm not the only one. You better stop it before people start to put two and two together. There is nothing worse than a true rumor. Oh and I better warn you. He tends to have a uncanny knack for knowing things, so you better keeps your paws to yourself,"

I caught the double meaning. She meant Edward- becuase she had once been rejected herself- and Mike becuase he was her prospect boyfriend. I felt like I had been slapped. I have never had many friends, and so I had little experience with girls like Jess. She seemed to be my best friend when I was complying to her 'inner-mind rule book' and then her enemy when I broke those rules!

But what she said really hit home. Jess was right. All I had done was wait for Edward to come back to school. It was pathetic. I haven't even talked to him!

I was obsessing and I should stop. What happens happens and there is nothing I can do about it.

Edward and Rosalie hadn't been to school for an entire week.

I wonder if she is dead? I wonder if I actually managed to kill Rosalie, and Edward is too grief stricken to attend school! Maybe his mind sends out less messages when he is upset! What if they lay charges! Maybe I should start looking in the deaths section of the newspaper...

Edward and Rosalie hadn't been to school for two whole weeks.

She must be dead. Its the only explanation. Either that or they have contracted a rare disease that is only curable by skipping school. But he would have thought about it... Who am I kidding, I hear him once a day now! ONCE. How am I supposed to know if he is sick.

Edward and Rosalie hadn't been to school for a three weeks.

Now this was becoming ridiculous.

Friday. How do I put it... It was the strangest and best day of school. Ever. Why?

Because I learnt that Edwards voice sounds so much better in real life. So very much better.

For the past three weeks I had been dying of boredom and anticipation. I hadn't heard much in my mind at all and my school was getting more and more repetitive. Charlie had been driving me too school in his police cruiser. Yes, Police cruiser with flashing lights and the works! My good old red truck, which I'd become surprisingly fond of, was almost beyond repair but Jacob had insisted that he fix it for me. He had visited almost everyday in the first week after that accident whether it be to grovel, watch a movie or just to hang out. He was there without fail. But he always had that guilty look in his eyes. No matter how many times I told him it wasn't his fault I crashed, he insisted that it was. It seemed that almost all our conversations ending up with us talking about the crash.

"If you hadn't been driving me home Bella, you would have never crashed your car!" he cried on Tuesday night after watching a particularly girly film which he, of course, had let me choose.

"Jake. It. Was. My. Fault." I punctuated putting my hands on the hips.

"But Bells..."

"But Jacob," I snapped "You are fine, I am fine. No harm done."

"Bella. It was all my fault"

"JAKE,"

"Yes?"

"Are you sure you didn't hit your head?" I joked as I tried to keep my temper in check.

I was rewarded by one of Jacobs warmest smiles.

"Fine Bella, but at least let me fix your car for you,"

My poor car had spent the last few days at the front of my house, a constant reminder of the Cullens. Perfect.

I knew how much Jacob loved his cars. He was already fixing up a few car parts and looked after other cars on the Reservation. I guessed there was no harm in him fixing my car for me... I would pay him of course.

"I am sure that you don't want to pay for a mechanic!" Jake said, after I paused for minute before answering.

"Thanks Jacob, that could be great. But I would pay you." I told him sternly.

"Fine,"

"Fine!"

With that Jacob finally was off my back about the accident. He still visited me and I drove down to the Reservation with Charlie when a game was on TV.

Back to my story, on Friday I was dropped off my Charlie, again. It was fun. Everyone now knew, if they didn't already, that I was the chiefs daughter. Not that that seemed to deter Mike and Eric. Mike still was following me around like a lap dog and Eric was trying his best to be over-helpful. I tried very hard to pretend that I was excited about going down the La Push beach when the weather cleared up, but deep down was not. Its not that don't like beaches... I just don't relish a long car trip squished between Eric, Jess and/or Mike. My only consolation was that I could try and convince Jacob to meet me down there.

I got to school and started the day like normal: boring and easy lessons, dealing with Jess, Mike and Eric and dreading P.E later in the afternoon.

Then out of the blue, without any warning:

I hope I can stay away.

I can't stay away she... Bella... I won't talk to her. I will ignore her like I used too.

Edward! He was back! I can sadly say that I could not stop the euphoria which erupted in me as I realized that he here! I know, I am pathetic. Was he talking about me? Well obviously he said my name! He, the Greek god himself, was thinking about me! Curse his fast thinking. I wish I could pick up his full sentences. I breathed in deeply and sighed, it was good that he was back. My mind felt complete. It was finally full again. I hadn't even felt him slip back in and fill the hollowness in my mind. The little dark corner which was almost empty for a little under three weeks was finally bright and full.

Like a Christmas pudding. Yum.

Did I just compare Edward to a Christmas pudding? I really was deprived.

Its a good thing that he said my name! Before all he could think of was killing me! Maybe now that Edward was back I could see if Rosalie was truly dead, and maybe I could approach Alice. She had been so good to me, she had even called herself my friend! And yet I hadn't talked to her in almost three whole weeks. Hopefully I could build up the courage to talk to her.

I spent the rest of English hopping on the edge of my seat waiting for more thoughts. But none came.

One thing was for sure, I could not wait for biology. I hadn't even had one lesson with him and I was itching to question or even talk to him.

Dammit.

I almost ran with Jess to lunch. I burst through the cafeteria doors slamming them behind me causing the entire cafeteria to fall silent and stare at me as if I had gone insane. I even wondered if I had gone insane. But for once I didn't care if I was the center of attention.

I ran my eyes over the student body until it reached the table in the corner.

I stared in wonder as I flicked my eyes over the occupants of the table.

I felt as if the breath which I had been holding for the last three weeks had finally been expelled.

Edward sat his body angled away from me. He looked tense but almost... relieved?

His face was pale as usual but his eyes were a light golden colour. His lips were slightly parted and I could vaguely see the tips of his white teeth. It was as if the entire canteen had disappeared it was just me and him. His eyes lay on my face and his gaze had me rivited to the spot. I couldn't look away.

And then it hit me. His face held an unguarded tenderness and he was staring straight at me.

I felt my heart skip a beat and I barely hear Jess talking to me and Mike pushing from behind. I didn't see Rosalie who was sitting right next to Edward a look of disgust on her face. I didn't see Alice clutching Jasper's hand under that table. I didn't see Jasper's look of pain. I didn't see Emmett ready and waiting to restrain Rosalie.

I only saw Edward.

I couldn't move my eyes as his were glued to mine. Never leaving my face. I could tell that he was fighting himself. Don't ask how. Call it ESP but I knew. His cheeks showed tension and I am sure that if I could have seen his hands, that they would be clenched underneath the table.

How am I supposed to even attempt the stay away from her.

A/N: Whoops, this is kinda shorter than usual. I could say all the normal excuses, but everyone knows them. All I can say is that I'm sorry. Thanks everyone for reviewing (Even though you haven't had an update for a million years). Sometimes a little thing called life gets in the way :D Sorry again and thanks for reading. Beck you have to write a story now!
I love all you guys for sticking with this story.