(Hi, this is a late posting right? Yes, I know and I apologize but I hope you still like it. By the way, I want to say a special thank you to all you FanFic writers. You have no idea how much you have helped me in this Scandal hiatus. Every time I get an alert of your updates, I start to giggle in excitement. I love this fandom! It's everything..Gladiators Rock! Anyway, thanks for your continued support of this story. Please feel free to leave feedback; really interested to see your thoughts on this chapter...Have a great week!)
Disturbances, Tempests and Thunders
Finally, it was home.
Fitz couldn't quite describe what he was feeling. All he knew was that in all the years he lived in this house it had never felt like his home. It felt like a place that he came to eat and sleep. It felt like a place he shared with Max his dog but he never felt the comfort and the serenity that he should feel when he came home. He stopped envisioning raising a family here – listening for the sounds of his children giggling as they ran down the halls on Saturday mornings. Holidays, parties, celebrations with family and friends started to seem so foreign. Initially, he bought it with the intention of one day filling it with his family but the empty rooms and echoing sounds gave him a constant reminder of what seemed to be unattainable. Until now. She was here; with him. She was lying beside him in his bed for the first time; she would be waking up to have breakfast with him for the first time. Her bare feet would walk through the home; her laughter would resonate against the cool white walls. And he would no longer feel the loneliness; no more regrets and harsh remembrances. It was the season of firsts for them; each one better than the last. This was real; his house had now come to feel like home.
It was barely 1AM and he was exhausted; he should have been asleep but he couldn't get his mind to quiet down. Thoughts of her and him, dreams, goals, ideas kept dancing in his head and he would continue to forego sleep if it meant that he could hold on to them for a little while longer. They had just gotten in from the east coast and he refused to let her to leave his side. Holding her hostage seemed like a good idea. He had even called ahead and had Abby pack her more clothing and meet them at his place. She was a little irritated by his high-handedness but eventually her smile returned when she realized what the gesture really meant. And while she did not commit to moving in with him; she agreed to stay another night. It was a start.
Now as he looked down at her, he wondered how she could be so graceful even in her sleep. He wondered why he could not stop touching her skin and stroking her hair; why was he so intoxicated with her? Why every time she walked into a room, all his attention immediately went to her; even stopping in mid-sentence just to get a glance? Why he constantly sought her out and felt a surge of energy anytime she stood next to him? After all these years, his feelings for her seemed to intensify daily and at times the depth of it overwhelmed him. They had been through so much together and there was sure to be more, much more on the horizon, but whether they were scathed, wounded or on the losing end of one battle or another; he knew in the end they would be victorious. He would have it no other way.
Careful not to wake her, he inched the thin sheet down away from her shoulders. He needed to look upon her completely. Her mumble caused him to pause but when he was sure she was still asleep, he continued in his journey to see the fullness of her naked beauty. The playful, wicked smile betrayed his plan to do more than just look; he wanted to touch, to feel her, to have her wake up to him in their bed…in their home.
Her cell phone chimed loudly as an alert to an incoming call. He thought to ignore it but a call at this time was more than likely be an emergency of some sort. He reached over her still sleeping body and grabbed her phone on the nightstand.
"Hello," Fitz only had a fleeting thought that whoever was on the other end might be surprised to hear a male voice answering her phone. But he didn't care, they would have to get used to it eventually anyway.
"Mmmm, yes, Fitz? Is this Fitz? This is Ashley."
"Hello Ashley, yes this is Fitz. What's the matter? Why are you calling this late? Is something wrong?"
"Mmmm, yes sir," she paused and Fitz knew she was debating on whether to tell him or just ask for Olivia.
"Livvy is sleep so you might as well tell me what it is."
She continued to pause and he waited and waited and waited until, "Well sir, Marcus and Jason have been arrested. The officer said they can make bail in about an hour but I thought Liv might want to know, you know, in case she wanted to come down, you know," her nervousness was compounded by the questions she knew they all would have to endure from both him and Olivia.
Fitz gave a belabored sigh, wondering what kind of trouble they had gotten themselves into. He said, "Alright Ashley we will be there before the hour."
"Sir, I don't think Liv would want you to come down and get involved," she was now in panic mode. Always thinking about the election and the potential harm it could do to Fitz was rule number one and what Olivia consistently drilled into their heads.
"Relax Ashley, if Livvy is coming down, then I am too." He disconnected the call and begrudgingly woke up his sleeping beauty.
XXXXXX
"All hopes of a quiet exit are gone. Somebody tipped off the press; there are at least 5-7 cameras outside waiting for us," Stanley said.
"Alright," Olivia as her eyes darted around the station to see who was in the area. Thankfully no one was really paying attention to them. Even with his baseball cap and long jacket, a couple of the officers still recognized Fitz but as they were supporters, all they wanted was to say hello, wish him the best and shake his hand.
"What do you want to…" Stanley never got a chance to finish his question.
"Jason get on that video surveillance right now, we may need it as evidence," he nodded and left out the back of the police department.
"Ashley, use the back way to get Fitz out of here without any one seeing him. No one can see him Ashley, is that understood?"
She nodded her head in understanding at the same time that Fitz gave a firm, "No!"
Olivia expected his disagreement. She pulled him to the side out of the earshot of the others. "Fitz let me do my job."
"No Livvy, we do this together. I'm not sending you out to the press by yourself to handle this."
"Fitz that's what I do…I handle things like this…Right now I'm not your girlfriend, I'm your campaign fixer. So please let me do my job. The election is in less than 48 hours, so all I need to do is spin this story so we look like the victim. It's better if you are not there. Just let me do this. I will meet you at home in a bit."
Her last sentence calmed his nerves and he gave her a smile meant to melt her heart, which it did. "You said home," he reminded her.
Just because he was so outrageously handsome at 2 o'clock in the morning and hiding under a baseball cap, she hugged him tightly. When she pulled back she smiled back at him and said, "I know what I said Fitz…now go please."
Ashley took Fitz out the back way and once Olivia was sure they were able to drive away undetected, she looked at Marcus and Stanley and said, "Let's go."
As expected, when she exited the precinct, camera bulbs lit up in her face and reporters began firing off questions and calling her name. She held up a hand to quiet them down before speaking.
"Good morning everyone. I know all of you are here for the same reason so I will make this brief. Two employees of the Grant campaign were detained and questioned by law enforcement due to an altercation at a local restaurant. This incident was a direct result of our employees being attacked by patrons of the restaurant – both verbally and physically. These patrons were highly intoxicated, spouting hateful, racial slurs about the candidate Fitzgerald Grant and myself. They provoked and initiated the altercation. They were no doubt looking for an opportunity to publicly slander this campaign. This, of course, is further evidence that race relations in this state are far from where they should to be. I think all of us agree that these actions should not be supported or tolerated. Anytime, any person is criticized for their race and background it is a huge travesty that not only affects us individually but the entire country as a whole. I hope each of you will consider that what you report regarding this incident can serve to improve or further damage the plight of minorities in this state….Thank you."
Olivia didn't allow for questions. She immediately left with Marcus and Stanley.
"That was perfect Liv, just perfect," Marcus said.
She didn't respond. She didn't want the election to be about her race; she didn't want it to cloud Fitz' political platform or continue to be the subject of interviews and debates. But they could not avoid it and so her plan included using the media to spin situations and stories like these into their favor. She wouldn't initiate the subject but when it was thrown out, she wouldn't hide from it either.
In the end, the public would learn to accept their interracial relationship or run the risk of being stigmatized as racists; either one was fine by her.
XXXXXX
"I shouldn't be here…If anyone saw me here…I'm the Secretary of State…I can't be seen having secret meetings with you all outside of the capital building…This looks bad…really bad," Mellie was in a panic, speaking to no one in particular and pacing the floor.
Nattie was disgusted with her weakness. "Mellie calm down. None of us want to be here but you came to me. You said you wanted to get on board. You wanted it and now you got it. So sit down. You're making me dizzy."
Mellie looked at her, shocked by her demanding tone and eventually sat down.
"Now can you please tell us about your meeting with Cyrus?"
Mellie took a deep breath to steady her nerves. She kept darting her eyes to the door, half expecting someone would walk in and expose their meeting.
Olivia understood her reticence, "Mellie, no one is coming; no one knows we are here. So calm down and tell me what happened."
"Cyrus is not giving up…he knows I have an on air interview coming up with on The State of Politics with David Russell and he's going to fix it so that the subject of your relationship with Fitz comes up. He wants me to publicly discredit your relationship as immoral and a bad example to the party and the country. I'm to distance myself from Fitz because the Party doesn't want to support him. They'll let him be Governor for the 4 years but he'll go no further than that."
Olivia wasn't shocked; it was a scare tactic. He hoped to scare Fitz with into ending their relationship. Cyrus was cautious enough to know that she might not follow his direction and leave after the election. So he had a plan B in place just in case.
Olivia and Nattie looked at each other; silently communicating leaving Mellie in ignorance as she tried to decipher their secret code.
Olivia finally turned to Mellie and asked, "So why are you here? Why are you trying to help us?"
"First of all I trust you a whole hell of a lot more than I trust Cyrus. He would hang me out to dry the first chance he got. At least you would honestly warn me first. And second, for all our bad blood, I'm smart enough to know where the wind blows. I've seen you two together – you and Fitz – you won't go away silently, at least not without taking the whole Party down with you. This dream they have of discrediting Fitz and banishing you from his life is just stupid. People will see through that and each one of their asses will be exposed as the bigots they are…besides I know a President when I see one."
"And of course you want to be his VP." Olivia offered to fill in the blanks.
"Naturally," Mellie said, "Fitz will make it to the White House…I can…I can guarantee it." Mellie was proud of her boast.
"NO!" Nattie and Olivia yelled at the same time, shocking Mellie, who assumed they would go along with her offer.
"Don't you dare mention that ever again..This is the exact reason I didn't bring Fitz into this meeting…he can't be a part of even the hint at election rigging. So no…never again. And Mellie you might want to bury whatever the hell you think you have. You'll end up destroying yourself…unlike Fitz you bought your way into your position…remember that!"
"Listen I'm trying to help!…If I leave it up to you, Cyrus would have us all strung out on a pole for the sake of his precious Fitz in the Oval. So if you don't want my help then fine…I'm leaving….but don't for one moment think your etching me out of the picture. All of us, including your precious Fitz, have dirt that we don't want to be exposed. All of us can potentially crash and burn." Mellie stormed out of the room and slammed the door in her wake.
Nattie sigh was one of relief. It was good that Mellie left on her own; it saved Nattie the trouble of putting her out of the room so that she could discuss private matters with Olivia.
"I should have let you take care of Cyrus a long time ago like you wanted to," Olivia said.
Nattie chuckled, "You and I both know that was an empty threat. For all the trouble that old man causes, he is fiercely loyal to Fitzgerald and will do anything to make sure he succeeds. He just….well he doesn't understand what it is to love someone, passionately and unconditionally. He doesn't understand what it means to give anything, risk everything, for the love of another person. He thinks in terms of power and dominance…everything else is less important and secondary."
"So what do you want to do about him?"
"I'll take care of it…he will pretty much know I'm involved when Mellie goes on the show and says what I tell her to, which will be the complete opposite of what he wanted," Nattie said.
"And Gerry?"
"Already taken care of…What's your agreement with Fitz?"
"I don't tell him details. He understands that. He knows some of what I do goes into the gray areas of legalities. So, I only tell him final plans. I'll see him after I leave here….My team has the names of the three Senators Gerry has been talking to."
"Are they on the flashdrive?"
"Two of them are, one is not. To tell you the truth I didn't want to use the information on the flash drive. I don't want to go that far, not unless we have to."
"Then just send up a smoke signal. Test the waters and see if they will back down before using everything. The last Senator is Robertson right?"
"Yes."
"Let me think on that one and I will get back to you," Nattie said thoughtfully.
Olivia watched her in awe. Countless times she wondered about Nattie – who was she really? And how much power did she really have? Her respect for Nattie prevented her from trying to dig into her background but she repeatedly wondered if her stereotypical assumptions of Nattie's Italian family roots meant that she had at least some ties to organized crime.
"Ok then, I better get back," Olivia said as she stood and went over to kiss Nattie on the cheek.
Nattie grabbed her hand and looked up at her saying, "Liv, he's going to make it….all the way and you will be right there with him. I won't be around forever but you have no idea how much comfort it gives me to know that he has you. I know you will take care of my son and I know he will take care of you. I have never seen two people as much in love as you two…Remember all the rest of this doesn't really matter, it's all an illusion of power; what really matters is you two and how you feel about each other…All I ask…all I want is for you to take care of each other…that's all any of this has ever been for…for you…for you to be together. Because when this is all gone; it's only the love that remains."
XXXXXX
Election Day….
"…..8:00 at the polling booths and the first persons we see is Assemblyman Reston and his lovely Wife, Jessica and of course Fitzgerald Grant and his lovely girlfriend Olivia Pope casting their votes. They were very cordial in greeting one another. They took the time to pose for several pictures together. It was a great testament to the American Voting System….."
On the morning news program, Republican Mayor Gerald Adams, was being interviewed:
"This is an exciting race not only for the issues being presented and the completely opposing views of the candidate but the personal aspects are exciting as well."
The interviewer asked, "Well I don't think we can speak about this election without addressing the interracial relationship between the Republican candidate, Fitzgerald Grant and his African-American girlfriend, DC Fixer, Olivia Pope, can we?"
Adams laughed and said, "Well it's funny that this wasn't a subject for discussion until very recently when Grant decided to bring their relationship public. I for one appreciate his honesty. And really, should their race be an issue...at this day and age? Anyone who is making it an issue is revealing their biased beliefs and attitude, which I think we all agree is pretty sad."
The interviewer said, "It really shouldn't be an issue and they make a great power couple. What about the fact that they are dating and not married, do you think that makes a different in the voter's minds?"
Adam quickly responded, as he had been coached to do so, "Well if I'm not mistaken and unless we have regressed back to arranged marriages it's only natural that you date before you get married right?"
Olivia switched off the television and spoke into the phone, "He did great Nattie. Thanks, I will see you at the party."
XXXXXX
"What are you doing?" Fitz asked as he walked into her office. Olivia was down on her hands and knees feeling through the carpet. Frowning and muttering indistinguishable words to herself, she was obviously upset that she could not find what she was searching for. He had stood in her doorway for several minutes admiring the view of her curved backside accented through her pencil skirt.
She looked back at him over her shoulder and said, "Nothing, I lost something and I was looking for it…Never mind I'll look for it later," she got up and dusted off her skirt. "Are you okay? Did you need something?"
"Yes….you," he smiled as he closed the door to her office and came in to sit down.
She laughed at him, "What's the matter, nervous energy, too excited to focus?" She leaned against the front of her desk as she watched him take the seat in front of her.
"That and you keep dodging my question."
"I already answered you, "No" was my reply," she softened her response with a loving smile.
"Livvy, that's not the correct answer so I thought I would give you time to reconsider," he smiled back in that charming way of his that always tended to melt her down and make her willing to give him whatever he wanted. It always worked and he knew it.
"Stop it…and don't look at me like that. I know what you're doing…You give me that smile and you know I melt like butter. I can't this time Fitz….I won't…We need time, can we just make sure you are elected first then everything else will fall into place?"
"You're really scared aren't you?" Fitz asked softly as he read the fear behind her words. It was amazing to him that this was the same petite woman who fearlessly took a tire iron and busted a guy's knee cap but she was afraid to love him.
She took a deep breath and lowered her head. "Everything in my life I can navigate well except us. I can control every aspect of everything, anticipate what will happen next, compensate for any unexpected events and plan accordingly. It works. But this, you and me, I can't seem to do it. I'm scared of taking one step because it may be the wrong move. It may mean the end of you, the end of me and the end of us."
"You once told me that no matter what your future was you knew that it would always be with me. You trusted that…you knew that we would always be together even if you didn't know every little detail of how it would all work out."
"Yes I did and shortly after, I screwed everything up. I let my fear and insecurity rob us of 7 years. I walked away without even talking to you about it. I left you out there. If I hadn't done that…If I hadn't driven you away maybe we wouldn't have been so lost and broken; maybe you wouldn't have felt you had to do certain things," she trailed off and the final words could barely be heard, as it was a reprimand to herself.
"What things?"
"Nevermind, let's just talk about it later," she shouldn't have brought the subject up. She promised herself to wait until after the election. It was not yet the time to open up the wounds of the past.
"Livvy?" he prompted. He started to say more to convince her to open up to him but there was a knock at her office door.
Lauren poked her head inside and said, "Excuse me Liv but there is an Officer Wiseman here to see you."
"Thank you Lauren, please show him in."
The officer walked in as Fitz stood from his chair and took a position next to Olivia.
"Good Morning Ma'am."
"Good Morning Officer," Olivia said as she shook his hand and continued, "and of course you know Fitzgerald Grant."
"Yes of course sir, it's an honor," said the young officer as he shook Fitz' hand.
He cleared his throat and continued, "Well I won't take up much of your time. I just thought you might like to know that the charges against your employees have been dropped. It seems the other gentlemen had a change of heart and didn't want to press the issue. They've also offered to cover the cost of any damages to the establishment."
Olivia smiled brightly, "Well that is great news officer. Thank you very much. And I appreciate you coming all the way down here to deliver the news in person. I see that you have on your sticker so thank you for voting."
The officer blushed under her praise. He stammered out, "Thank you ma'am and can I say my girlfriend goes on and on about your clothing and style. She admires you. She will get a kick out of the fact that I met you today."
"Well officer, when we win tonight, be sure to bring your girlfriend to the party and I would be happy to meet her in person."
"Thank you ma'am. You both have a great day," he said excitedly then exited.
When they were alone, Fitz laughed, "The perfect politician's wife. Thank you for taking care of that," he hugged her close to him. He felt her tense up at the hint of marriage but ignored it. They hadn't spoke about marriage since the trip to the east coast but his proposal was obviously imminent; in the meantime, he was trying to work on getting her to move in with him. He continued reassuringly, "I don't know how I got so lucky to have you Livvy but I'm never letting you go…no matter what…Even if you try to run, I would search to the ends of the earth to find you and drag you back to my side."
She smiled and pulled his head down to kiss her, when he was inches away from her mouth, he smiled and said, "Don't think I have forgotten our earlier conversation…We will finish our discussion later, I'm just momentarily distracted."
She chuckled as he finally brought his lips to hers.
XXXXXX
8PM. Although all the precincts had not been counted it was clear that Fitz was the front-runner and the unequivocal victor in the race. Several of the staffers had already been sent home to get prepared for the victory celebration in the banquet hall at the Hyatt Regency in Sacramento. Fitz had been in his office for several hours taking phone calls from several Republican politicians wishing him well and vowing their support of his administration. He got up to stretch as he finished his final phone call for the evening.
Cyrus entered his office and crashed down into his chair.
"Congratulations Governor," he said smiling.
Fitz smiled back, "That's a bit premature, don't you think?"
"Your humility amazes me but entirely unnecessary at this point….So listen before you head out to get changed for this evening…I think we need to talk."
"Oh about what?"
"You and Olivia," Cyrus said calmly.
"Not a subject up for discussion," Fitz said.
Cyrus sighed and stared at him, undeterred by Fitz' defensiveness, "I've asked her to go home after the election. She will have done her job, having gotten you successfully elected; there is no other use for her."
Fitz' temper flared. He yelled, "Who the hell do you think you are! You don't get to tell Olivia anything, not a damned thing, do you hear me Cy?"
Cyrus raised his hand to calm him down, "Yes I hear you…look I was only trying to save your relationship with the Party. Why didn't you tell me about the call you got from Senator Robertson?"
"Because, one, it is none of your business and two I knew you would side with his bigoted ass and support his idea of me arranging some political marriage to fit in with the Party's racist by-line. It's not happening and the sooner you realize it the better. Look Cy, I want you on my team, I want you with this administration but not if you are going to derail my relationship with Olivia. If you can't live with it then fine, it's about time we part ways. Don't ever think you can make me choose between her and this Party and my position because all of you would lose, each and every time."
XXXXXX
11:26PM. According to the California Secretary of State's website, with 39 percent of precincts counted, Grant led opponent Assemblyman Reston by 8.7 points. Fitz had taken the lead and was the presumed victor of the gubernatorial race. It was time for Fitz to claim the victory as California's new Governor.
The crowd gathered at the Hyatt was chanting his name, eager for him to come out and give his acceptance speech; it didn't matter that Assemblyman Reston had not yet conceded.
Fitz was pacing in the hallway; several staffers, including Cyrus had already reminded him that he was due to address his supporters but that hadn't motivated him to make a move towards the stage.
"Pacing is my job, not yours," Olivia joked as she walked up on him.
He stopped pacing and looked at her. "Livvy" he breathed as if he had been starving for her presence for years.
"So Governor, what are we waiting for?" she asked as she sauntered closer to him. When she called him Governor he thought it was the sexiest thing he had ever heard.
"You."
"I'm always around, you know that."
"Yes I know but I needed you right here, right now."
"Oh, for what?"
This was not the way he planned it. There was supposed to be music, candles, and flowers –the works. But when he thought about the conversation he had with Cyrus earlier that day and his father's insistence on running his life, he knew he had to show them that he controlled his future and he would make the final choice. She was and would always be his choice. And now the world would see it.
"Because I'm not going out there until you agree to become my wife," he said as he got down on one knee. "Livvy, I need you to be with me forever; I need to know that every day I get to go home with you; I get to fall asleep with your arms wrapped around me; I get to hear your laughter filling our home and your whispers in my ear. I love you Livvy, more than I thought it was possible to love another person – totally, absolutely and completely. Please say you'll be my wife. Livvy, please marry me."
Taken aback and surprised by the moment, she looked down at him with tears pooling her eyes. "Fitz, they're calling for you out there…now is not the time for this…" she started but then gasped as he took out the ring box and showed her the ring.
"You….you…." she was speechless as she stared at the most beautiful ring she had ever seen.
"I know. I had been watching you search everywhere for this ring all week. I had to restrain myself from laughing when I saw you searching through the carpet trying to find it. I took if off your finger while you were sleeping. My jeweler added another band…it's like a promise from the past blended with a promise of the future."
A promise from the past, 'to remind you that my love for you will never fade. My heart will always be promised to you.' And now a future, a blank page for which they could write their own poems, sonnets and haikus filled with rhythmic verses only lovers share. He slipped it on her finger; a band to symbolize an endless circle of fidelity another forever.
She still hadn't responded. She was caught up in the joy of the moment. She knew he intended to propose but the how and when's remained a mystery and although she expected it; she still had trouble realizing that he really wanted to be with her; to marry her. His knee was getting sore but he would wait for her as long as she needed him to; he couldn't rush her – not now, not for this.
"Fitz, it's just beautiful…so beautiful….I just don't know what to say," her eyes kept darting between him and the ring resting delicately on her finger. She was completely overwhelmed and probably for one of the few times in her life, she was at a total loss for words.
He chuckled and said, "Well I was kind of hoping you would say yes, but no pressure."
She seemed to suddenly realize that she hadn't answered him. "Oh my god Fitz, get up, get up, please," she said as she helped him stand. She looked up at him smiling and said "Yes, Yes, Yes, of course I will marry you."
The kiss was like nothing they had ever experience before – a bubble inside a raging storm; a capsule inside a tempestuous wind. The cheers from the rally deafening in their ears but silenced and drowned by their devotion to one another. Surrounded by waves of people yet alone, solitary in an unfathomable love; a love that should have died from years of neglect and starvation.
A sealed promise that they would never be alone in their fears or trepidation of the past, present or future. Bonded with hope, faith and trust; partners, solidified by an indestructible force of nature – undying love.
It was only when they heard someone clearing their throat for what may have been the 5th time, did they finally pull apart. Olivia hadn't even realized she had been lifted off the ground. When Fitz tried to put her back down, she wobbled; weakened by the intensity of the moment.
"Excuse me, I'm sorry but Governor you are needed on stage," Lauren said nervously.
He never took his eyes away from Olivia but smiled and said, "Thank you Lauren, we're coming out now."
After Lauren left them alone, Fitz said, "Are you ready?"
Olivia frowned in confusion. "Livvy you are my fiancée, we are getting married, you are coming out with me on stage to accept this position. I won't go out there without you."
She wanted to tell him no, convince him that she needed time to adjust to her new role. Shifting from the background to front and center was not an easy task; she needed to prepare herself. But looking at him, seeing the pure emotion on his face; the constancy of his affection for her, she knew she could not reject this new beginning for them. A season of new experiences; a life together; a path to happiness.
She smiled, placed her bejeweled hand in his and said, "Let's go Governor."
XXXXXX
Everything felt cool, crisp and calm; she was gliding through water – where she felt the comfort and easiness of a familiar partner. She was relaxed, recognizing the water as her safe haven. There was nothing to fear, ever, when she was surrounded by water. It could be vast, intimidating, rushing to form a tidal wave and still she would welcome it, respect its power and bend to its will. It was beauty and grace, silhouetting her athletic form as she went deeper and deeper….
An abyss. A sinking quicksand of terror. Suffocating, drowning; the water had become her enemy, holding her captive; weighing her down mercilessly. She was flailing, desperate for air, unable to control her burning lungs. Struggling, she had almost made it to the top – safety and release but a hand dragged her back down…
Olivia.
Olivia.
Olivia.
When she had finally awoken, she was disoriented, unable to recognize her surroundings – a look of fright on her face, eyes wild and fierce, panicked by the man next to her until he touched her face and the consoling blue eyes shone through the darkness of night to offer her comfort.
"Livvy, it's me, Fitz. Baby, are you okay?"
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying to gain some semblance of normalcy.
"I'm okay…I'm fine…It was…It was just a nightmare, nothing really. I'm sorry I woke you," she rushed out trying to minimize the event.
He stared at her for several moments, watching as her breath calmed and she seemed to relax. "I'll get you some water."
When he returned with the water, he sat on her side of the bed and watched her take a drink. He reached to turn on the lamp on the nightstand, but she stayed his hand. "Don't please," she asked. At this moment she preferred the darkness. She could hide better that way.
He smoothed her hair away from her face and said, "That must have been a horrible nightmare. You were screaming and fighting in your sleep. Do you want to talk about it?"
Shrouded by darkness, the only sliver of light coming from the moon, but with his heart he could still see the tears streaming down her face.
"Livvy, you have nightmares and you take medication. I know something happened to you that you don't want to tell me. But I promise you that nothing, absolutely nothing you could say could make me change how I feel about you. I want to marry you. I will marry you and whatever it is you tell me won't ever change my mind. Please trust me."
He understood her hesitancy; he felt it himself because in her confession, his would have to be revealed as well. "Ly down with me Livvy," he invited as he moved to his side of the bed while she resumed her position. They now lay facing each other in bed. Shadows cast like a mask representing two faces – a light side to reveal truth and the disappearing dark that held secrets for too long.
In their quiet repose, as they stared in each other's eyes, an unspoken agreement not yet to touch one another; to give each other the space and freedom to speak the truth present somewhere in their eyes.
"Cy told you," he calmly stated, her silence was an agreement and he continued, "Let me guess, he told you I killed two people in cold blood for no reason whatsoever…just because I felt like becoming a murderer….Why didn't you come to me and tell me what he said? I would've told you what really happened. Did you….did you think what he said was true?" The last question was a soft plea riddled with anguish at the thought of her opinion of him being tainted.
Olivia shook her head slightly, "It didn't matter to me Fitz. I don't care. All that worried me was the part I played in driving you to do it." It was the resurfacing guilt that prevented her from asking him; afraid that every question would sound like an accusation; a judgment for a crime that by her decisions she had become an accomplice to. She understood the damage self-reproach could have on their relationship and she was fighting not to let it in. She quickly continued, "Besides, I have done worse." The quiet admission hung in the air as he deepened his frown trying to understand.
When she didn't continue, he took the initiative to start the pillow talk confession, hoping it would coax her into talking. His voice was calm and soothing, as if he was telling her a bedtime story, "I was in Aruba and I used to go to this run-down café. The food was horrible but there was this young girl…."
They never went back to sleep. There were tears, whispered words of consolation, no judgment, no condemnation, just acceptance of decisions made in impossible situations. And in the end there was an indescribable measure of relief; an anchored weight had been removed and they had been freed from a dark past, carefully concealed. They had only been concerned about the feelings of the other; the possibility of rejection and the damage the severest criticism would cause. But never again…a new level of honesty, truthfulness and candor sealing the foundation of their relationship.
XXXXXX
Olivia was trying to end her phone conversation as she knew it would be a matter of minutes before the flight attendant instructed that all cell phones had to be turned off. She had finished her update to both Fitz and Cyrus; leaving plenty for them to do in her absence. Several meetings had been scheduled for them to start appointing his staff. She figured the more she gave Fitz to do while she was gone the less worried he would be.
"Thanks, Cyrus. Can you take me off speaker? I need to talk to Fitz," Olivia said as she buckled her seatbelt.
"Sure, bye Liv," Cyrus said.
"You're off speaker," Fitz said through the phone.
"How are you?" she asked cautiously. They had an argument that morning over something petty, inconsequential but the underlying meaning was there – they just hadn't addressed it. He was afraid to let her go, afraid that she might not come back.
"I'm OK. I'm sorry about this morning. It was a stupid argument. I'm sorry," he said remorsefully.
"It's OK Fitz. Don't worry; I'll only be gone for a few days. I'll be back before you know it."
"People always say that. It's not true. I already know you're gone," he sighed heavily, "But have a safe trip and call me when you get in."
"I will…I promise…And Fitz, I love you..more than anything."
"I love you too Livvy."
She didn't want to disconnect the call. She just wanted to listen to him breath; to calm his fears and assure him that she would always come back to him. She needed him just as much, if not more than he needed her.
Abby gently shoved her arm to alert her to the flight attendant advising her to shut off her phone. Olivia nodded her head and said through the phone, "Fitz I have to get off the phone now; it's almost take off. I love you," she said again more fervent than the last, hoping that each time she said it – he would be more assured of her unalterable devotion.
Again he sighed. He wanted to go back with her. It was a trip to arrange the shipment of the last of her belongings to California. It would be an emotional time – saying goodbye to her mother, her friends and her former life. He wanted to be there for her; to comfort her and assure her that everything would be alright. He wanted to make sure that no doubts remained in her mind of the decision she made to spend the rest of her life with him. He needed to look into her eyes and make sure that she wanted this life with him too. "I love you too Livvy, bye."
"He loves you a lot," Abby said, somewhat in wonder and awe. She had never seen anyone as devoted to another as Fitz was to Olivia. It was in the way he looked at her, the way he sought her out amongst a crowd of people, the way he held her hand every opportunity he got. His whole look, demeanor, even the way he breathed seemed to change whenever she was around.
"I love him just as much, more even," Olivia said as she reached for some paperwork in her bag to keep her busy during the 5 hour flight. She caught Abby looking down at her engagement ring and could only imagine what Abby might be thinking about her own failed marriage.
"I will miss you Abby," Olivia said, changing the subject. "It was nice having you as a roommate again."
Abby laughed. "It was nice wasn't it? I will miss you too Liv. But hey this isn't goodbye forever, we will visit each other from time to time and I'm sure there will be some type of crisis that Pope and Associates will be able to offer our expertise and help you out."
Abby met the team at Pope and Associates through SKYPE. Olivia was relieved that they seemed to all get along well. Harrison liked her quick wit and sarcastic come-backs. Quinn liked the fact that she owned a gun. Huck said nothing but didn't reject either, so that was something. And David seemed to like her for personal reasons.
"Of course I will," Olivia smiled back and said. Secretly, Olivia was thankful for this trip because it served as a break for her. Since the election and since Fitz brought her on stage to introduce her as his fiancée, her phone and the emails had not stopped. By yesterday's count, there were already 7 blogs commenting on her daily fashion choices. Photos were taken of her as she went for a run, when she went to the grocery store and even when she went to get coffee. It was hard for her; a drastic difference from the private lifestyle she had grown accustomed to. She knew it was to be expected but it was still difficult for her to manage.
As part of her plan, she and Fitz had already done several interviews together, in which they attempted to stay focused on his political agenda but as expected, the topic would always turn to their personal relationship. Their answers were natural, not forced and not rehearsed. Their love was evident; translating well through televisions and news articles. And, in turn, people were falling in love with the couple. Olivia was pleased but knew that life would not continue this way and they still needed to prepare for the negative remarks that would eventually rise to the surface.
"Excuse me," another flight attendant came to their seats and whispered, drawing both Olivia and Abby's attention.
"I'm so very sorry to bother you but you're Olivia Pope right?"
Olivia smiled and said, "Yes."
"I just want to say that you and the Governor make a beautiful couple. I'm from here, California, and we just love you both together."
"Thank you very much. We deeply appreciate your support," Olivia said and as the woman walked away she was inwardly more thankful that she kept her voice down so as not to alert anyone else to her presence.
XXXXXX
"Sir, do you have a moment?"
Fitz looked at his watch and said, "I have about 4 minutes before my next meeting, what's up?"
Marcus laid several pages of email in front of Fitz and asked, "Have you seen these?"
Fitz quickly scanned the pages; all of the email was addressed to Olivia and from the same sender, someone unfamiliar to him and possibly some type of online alias. Fitz quickly frowned when he saw the subject lines all contained grave threats on her life.
Deflated with worry, he dropped back into his seat and asked, "Where? How did you get these?" It was unimaginable to Fitz that someone would want to harm Olivia. Why her? Why not him instead?
"Olivia gave me temporary access to her in-box to get some files and I saw them come through. It looks like she has read them. She knows about them," Marcus ventured. He hesitated to bring the emails to Fitz without talking to Olivia first but when he saw the details of the emails and the knowledge the sender had of Olivia's day-to-day activities, he knew he had to alert him. He watched as Fitz turned pale from the realization that his fiancée was being stalked by a psychopath.
"Tell Lauren to arrange a meeting for me with Ron Davis, the head of the CHP Security Detail this morning." As the Governor-elect, Fitz had already had a security detail assigned to him at all times. The detail included one man assigned to Olivia for important events but at her insistence, not for every day routine activity. She bargained with him and he agreed to the arrangement at least until he officially took office. No security had been sent with her to the east coast.
"Will do," Marcus said and quickly left the office.
'That reporter who came up to you yesterday at the grocery store was a little pushy don't you think'
'I like the route you take when you go for run. I should join you sometime'
'Have a safe trip to the east coast. I've heard that airplane flights are becoming a more dangerous way to travel'
Fitz' temper was flaring as he read each email. Olivia hadn't said a word about this to him. She knew he would have insisted that she have full-time security detail with her. He probably would have insisted that she postpone her trip to the east coast. The anger was mixed with a helpless feeling, knowing the threats were real and that she was the target filled him with dread. He needed to get her back here where she was safe with him as soon as possible.
XXXXXX
"How long are you going to stand there watching me?" Olivia asked without turning around. She had spent most of the day cleaning out her office; a process that took a lot longer than she expected – too many memories, good and bad.
She could feel Huck standing in her doorway. Everyone had already been to her office to congratulate her and wish her well. Everyone except Huck.
"Are you sure about this?" was all he asked.
She turned at his question. "I love him Huck…he wants me by his side and I want to be by his side. I'm going to be his First Lady," she proclaimed with pride and a tinge of fear. It was the fear that Huck picked up on.
"OK…I just worry about you…does he know?"
She knew what he meant and was pleased that she could confidently respond, "Yes, he knows everything…and he's OK…we're OK."
Huck could tell that there was no hesitation in her voice. She was ready; she could do it; she was strong enough. He was always concerned that her guilt and regret could drive her to make the wrong decision – relying on emotion instead of reason. But the fact that she trusted Fitz enough to tell him the truth spoke volumes about the strength of their relationship and Huck drew comfort from that. He would no longer have to worry about her. Fitz would take care of her.
"Alright then, if you ever need me, I'm there," he said and left her office without waiting for her to respond.
XXXXXX
Fitz was growing accustomed to the feeling of relief. He was working well with his staff; the transition period was proceeding smoothly. Cyrus was on board with Fitz' political strategy and agreed to relegate his advice to professional matters only; no interference in his personal life. Fitz knew the promise was not a lifetime guarantee but he would take it day-by-day. He was even pleasantly surprised to find that he could work well with Mellie, his Secretary of State.
He talked to Olivia everyday – sometimes twice a day. Since finding out about the threats, he was always on alert to her personal safety. He had not told her but he hired a private security firm to discreetly watch her while she was on the east coast. And now as the Thanksgiving Holiday was approaching, Olivia was coming home and bringing her mother to spend the holiday with them. He was prepared for the resistance he would get from Olivia regarding the increased detail but at least her mother would champion his argument.
It was getting late and he was tired. He was packing up for the day, ready to surprise Olivia by meeting her plane at the airport. He knew his security detail would make him very obvious but he didn't care. He needed to see her the moment she got off the plane. He was operating on very little sleep, anxious to have her back and afraid of the prospect that someone could take her away from him, just when he had finally gotten her back by his side.
Cyrus walked in, "Sir?"
"Not now Cyrus, it's late and everyone has gone home for the day. I'm heading out to meet Olivia's plane. So whatever it is will have to wait until tomorrow."
"The flight has been delayed…There was an anthrax scare at the airport. The details are sketchy but Governor Gray's office is saying that they believe it to be a false alarm. The preliminary investigation is continuing and no airplanes are landing right now. They are circling the airport waiting for the all-clear."
Fitz closed his eyes in heightened frustration. What next?, he thought. This was not the way he wanted the night to end. Then his mind sharpened and he recalled the email threat to Olivia in which her flight plans were included. The security report he received indicated no unusual persons were observing her or in her proximity. He wondered if the two incidents were related but he immediately dismissed the thought. There was no way, was there?
"How long has her plane been circling?"
"20 minutes. It shouldn't be long though."
"Alright I'll wait here," he was exhausted, irritated, hungry and so much more. All he wanted was Olivia.
"I'll keep you updated…Fitz, she'll be here soon. She'll be fine," Cyrus said sincerely. In the past couple of days, Cyrus had seen firsthand how Fitz barely functioned without her. Sure, he could handle the responsibilities of his job successfully but he was different. Cyrus couldn't describe what it was; all he knew was Fitz was a much better person when she was around. He didn't really understand how that was possible – for one person to dictate your entire mood was a strange concept to him; especially for someone with Fitz' power, intelligence and potential at greatness but here it was, staring him right in the face.
XXXXXX
"Our boy did it! Governor of California, just like his old man," Gerry said cheerfully as he walked into meet his estranged wife, Nattie. He was happy that he regained the use of his legs and could use a cane to navigate around. He wanted to stand tall in her presence; he didn't want to see her as long as he remained in that damn wheelchair. She could be in a wheelchair, he was used to seeing her that way, but it would never do for him, especially not in front of her.
"Hello Gerry. Yes he did. He worked hard for it and he got it. I'm very proud of him."
Gerry looked around the home in admiration and said, "You have a pretty nice set up here. I like it."
"Thank you…Are you going to sign the papers?" she said directly, needing to get to the point of the meeting.
"I have them right here," he said patting his right breast pocket.
She squinted her eyes at him. He was playing a game. If he was amicable to the divorce he could have signed the documents and forwarded them to her attorney. He delayed for too long, therefore, he wanted something in return. Out of decency, she waited until he had recovered sufficiently from the stroke before serving him with the papers. They already lived very separate lives, a divorce may have seemed a mute point but she had a purpose in detaching herself from him. She wanted the divorce now.
"What do you want?"
He laughed. "You know our entire marriage I kept making the mistake of underestimating you. You are a very powerful woman Nattie. You like to give this appearance of being weak and docile but you're not. I have to wonder, if you had shown your true side, would our marriage would have been different? Maybe we would've….gotten along better."
"I don't think so Gerry," there was no give and take; she wanted him to say what he wanted and leave, hopefully for good.
He sighed, suddenly disturbed by her unbending attitude. "You obviously approve of our son and Olivia Pope…You have to know Nattie, that's the last thing Republicans want in the Oval. Once there is a hint of an African-American being a stone's throw from the Oval, they're afraid it would open the possibility of all sorts of people thinking they have a legitimate shot to run this great nation. That won't happen. He won't make it past the primaries. They'll back someone else."
"I think he will make it. I know he will make it."
Her confidence unnerved him. She obviously knew a lot more than he did and he hated that. He hated not having the upper hand, especially over her. He shrugged. "Well I know you want to believe. People may love him and that girl now, but all it takes is one thing to go awry and as quick as they love him they can hate him too. I don't want to see that happen to our son. I know you don't either but there are much more powerful people in this country and despite what people may believe, candidates are chosen in closed off back rooms by people with real power, not by the fickle masses."
"I know exactly how they are chosen Gerry. Your mistake is thinking I don't have access to that back room of politics. You underestimate me once again. You ought to get tired of doing that. Now..if you will give me the papers then this relationship can be done, over with."
He smiled again. "Your settlement offer wasn't very generous."
"Life with you wasn't very kind…I don't think you deserve compensation for that," she countered. As part of their concealed marriage contract, no one knew that the majority of Gerry's wealth originated from his wife and her family. She would retain her wealth upon the dissolution of their marriage – the only requirement was that she give him children and remain married for a respectable period of time – both of which she had complied with.
Gerry realized that he had lost this battle with her but it was only a temporary waylay. His mind was already speculating on possible comebacks. He reached in his pocket and handed her the signed papers.
"Here you go Nattie…" he felt like he should say more. After all, they were married for decades. But he found there was nothing to say. Soft words of love, compassion and regret were sure to come off as insincere and she would see right through his pretense.
He said goodbye and began to walk towards the door when her words stopped him, "Gerry….your guy Charlie is really my guy Charlie. Don't call him anymore. Stop asking him to tail Olivia. He's mine and he's dead to you."
She could see Gerry's shoulders tense up at her statement. She had pushed him far enough today although she had enjoyed every minute of it. As he continued to exit her home, she thought that maybe he would give Fitz and Olivia some peace, if only for a little while.
Gerry kept walking and never looked back, now caught up in his own thoughts. People adored a man in love; praised him from afar but their compassion for a widower would move them to act in his behalf.
XXXXXX
Fitz looked up to see Stanley standing in his office doorway. He thought everyone had gone home for the day, except Cyrus and of course Lauren, who never left until he left.
"I've got a reporter looking for a comment on whether you are using your influence to get the plane carrying Liv to land before the 2 others that are also circling, what do you want to say?" Stanley asked.
"Tell them hell yes I am, as any other person would do in the same position!" Fitz yelled. He was running haggard trying to get an estimated time for when her plane would land. Within 30 minutes, everyone from the head of airport security to tower control to Governor Gray's office had heard from him and promised to update him on the situation. His patience was running thin and right now he didn't care what the press reported on the incident; he just wanted to make sure they landed safely.
Ashley overheard the conversation and appeared in his doorway too. "OK that's not what we are going to say. For now, we have no comment." Stanley nodded and disappeared back to his desk.
She turned to Fitz and stated, "I've been assured that they have enough fuel to circle for another half an hour. Its routine sir, she will be fine."
"Why are you all still here? I thought you went home hours ago."
"We did but when we heard about Liv's plane we came back…I'll let you know when I have something else."
10 minutes later, Cyrus and Ron came into Fitz' office, "Sir, the plane is landing in 20 minutes…apparently it was confirmed to be anthrax but no one has been affected and the airport is cleared of the hazard."
Fitz was so thankful that he felt like he could collapse from the news. Cyrus started to explain to him the protocol for a terror alert and the safety precautions that had to be adhered to but honestly, Fitz never heard a word. It didn't bother him that Cyrus probably thought he was overreacting. Olivia's life had already been threatened and every minute she was away from him was a moment where he could not guarantee her protection. Cyrus was still talking but he was already on his way out of the office to go to the airport.
The ride to the airport seemed to take longer than usual. Traffic was no doubt worse due to the flight delays and pick-ups. He knew this threat was not directed toward him or Olivia, but did this incident foreshadow what their life would be like in the future? Would he always be worried about her or she about him? Would the feeling of desperation be ever-present with him whenever she was not in his sight? Would they ever feel safe or would danger always be lurking over them like a dark cloud? What kind of life would that be for her or for his children?
Could they steal their happiness, taking moments away from life to create beautiful memories? And would it be enough happiness to drown out all the madness?