Past

"Are you nearly done?" Morgan asked, obviously eager to get out of here.

"Can we just look for her, please?" I didn't want to just leave her; she was the only family I had left, and she could be in trouble.

"I'm sorry, but we have to go." Morgan gestured for me to go through the door, but I remained where I was.

"I can't."

"You don't have a choice, I'm afraid."

"Maybe not. But you do! You can help me!"

"I can't. We need to get going, but the police will find her, and they'll make sure she gets the care it sounds like she needs, okay?"

I nodded reluctantly; she wasn't going to be persuaded, and she was probably right no matter how much I hated it. The police would find her, and she would get help she needed. The help that I had been unable to give her.

Present

"Ryan, can we talk for a second?" We had barely exchanged two words in the past week. For some reason, he had been virtually ignoring me ever since that night in his bedroom, and I was sick of wondering why; I wanted answers.

"What about?" He asked back. This had been happening too - him acting as if nothing was wrong, and as if all of this was perfectly normal.

"Just come with me, please?"

He shrugged, and sighed rather exaggeratedly.

"If it means that much to you."

He followed me out of the lounge and into the corridor, and I realised how much this seemed to happen-him doing something wrong, or at least something I thought was wrong, me getting annoyed, and then us eventually solving our issues, and it made me wonder whether he was really worth it... I quickly dispelled those thoughts from my head, however; every friendship (or even something more than that- at this point I had no real idea what we were) is worth fighting for.

"What's up with you lately? You've been acting weird ever since... Well, you know."

"Actually I don't. Just because I don't want to spend every second of every day with you doesn't mean I'm being weird."

"That's not what I said." I tried to act as though I wasn't hurt a little at this.

"No, of course not, that would be tactless. You just implied it." With that, he walked off, and I just stood there, torn between calling after him and just playing it off.

"Boy trouble?" Carmen asked from the bottom of the stairs.

"Maybe." I replied after a couple of seconds, and she shook her head at me.

"Is it really that obvious?" I groaned, and she laughed, coming towards me.

"Well, let's see. You two have barely been talking, you ask him for a private word and then he kinda blows you off? Looks like you're having problems to me."

"Well, seeing as you're the expert, what do I do?"

"Do you want to come up to my room?" She asked, her eyes focusing on a point behind me, and I turned to see Floss, Billie and Toni's heads quickly withdraw from the doorway.

"Yeah, sure."

We came upstairs, and she patted a space on the bed next to her, inviting me to sit down.

"So, what have you tried?"

"I've just kinda been waiting for him to say something, and then I talking to him. Apparently that wasn't the way forward."

"Okay. First rule: don't leave it to him. Second rule: figure out what you want- do you just want to be friends, or do you want a relationship?" She looked at me expectantly.

"Oh, I just want to be friends." She raised a skeptical eyebrow at me.

"What?!"

"Come on. You wouldn't have bothered with my advice if it was just that- you could've asked anyone, or we would still be downstairs."

I was torn; I needed someone to talk to, but I didn't want to admit that every time I saw him, my stomach flipped and my heart fluttered, and I couldn't stop thinking about his lips on mine, his hands on my waist, my fingers in his hair... I wanted to shake myself. This was ridiculous; obviously whatever he had once felt for me, if anything, had crashed and burned along with our friendship, and I was an idiot for even hoping otherwise.

"Oh, come on. You aren't exactly subtle!" Carmen said, and before I could deny anything, we were interrupted.

"Lunch!" We heard Mike yell up the stairs.

"To be continued." Grinned Carmen, and she ran down the stairs. I followed.

I was one of the last to reach the kitchen, and the only seat left was in between Ryan and Kazima.

My stomach did a sort of backflip as I took my seat. I ladled tomato soup into my bowl, and took some of the bread from the basket. I accidentally made eye contact with Carmen, who smirked at me, and I looked away as fast as I could.

"Okay guys, we're going on a walk around the nature reserve after lunch!" May-li announced, and Floss frowned.

"Do we have to?" She groaned.

"What's wrong with going on a walk?" May-li asked in return.

"They're just so boring!" Finn complained, and Billie nodded.

"I'm sure you'll enjoy it when we're there."

"I used to find something to look for to help pass the time when I went on walks when I was younger." I suggested, remembering a happier time when I was with my mum and dad, and we were a family. Of course, I hadn't appreciated it as much when I had it (I hated walks as a kid, too) but now I would give anything to go back.

"What do you mean?" Asked Floss.

"I used to see if I could find ten ladybirds, or maybe a few birds' nests for instance." I shrugged. "I just used to find it fun."

"I'm going to look for dragonflies!" Toni grinned at me, and I smiled back. At least someone was happy.

"Ryan, Alex, you're on dishwashing duty, then we can go." May-li told us, and I knew that this was going to be awkward as hell.

"I'll wash, you dry." Ryan told me as he turned the hot water on, not even suggesting that I had a choice.

"Sure." I replied, and passed him the washing up liquid from the shelf behind me.

"About earlier... " I started awkwardly.

"I don't want to talk, okay? I thought I made that pretty clear before!" His neutral expression dropped into a scowl almost immediately.

"I just wanted to say sorry, okay? I obviously upset you somehow, but I guess I can live with my knowing why."

"Right." He replied shortly, his scowl reverting back to his empty expression, which was somehow worse; at least before he had been feeling something, even if it was anger. We finished the dishes in silence, and Ryan strode off as soon as he was done, leaving me to dry the final plate.

"Alex and Ryan sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Sang Floss, coming around the door with Billie and Toni, and I almost laughed at how ridiculous it sounded. Instead, however, I just walked out into the hall where everyone was putting on their shoes and coats, and May-li was looking stressed. I went upstairs to find a warmer hoodie, and came back down to see May-li hovering outside her office, a grim look on her face.

"Alex? The police are here to see you - they want to talk to you about your mum."