Notes: I had to alter some things in chapter 7 when I realized Baxter actually lived in what looks like an old factory in A Thing About Rats. I mention this now because I had to reference some of those things again in this chapter. It was the only way I could think of for Baxter to have money after I realized he must have been broke at the start of the series.

Chapter Ten

Baxter slammed onto the cold floor of the Technodrome in the next moment. When he didn't immediately hear outraged cries from Shredder or Krang, he cautiously opened his eyes and pushed himself up. No one was watching him; they were all occupied with the arrival of the Turtles and Splinter. April, hiding behind a console, also hadn't been seen. Baxter decided to take a page from her book. He dove behind the console from the other side.

He tried not to think too hard about the fact that he had been right here when his horrific transformation had taken place, but it was impossible not to think of it. A shiver ran up his spine. The disintegration chamber was probably still here; Krang was far too much of a sadist to have taken it out. They would put him in it again if he was found. He knew it. And he didn't want to die now any more than he had then.

"You see, Krang?" Shredder crowed as Bebop smacked Raphael in the chest with a club. Raphael didn't even flinch. "They are completely under our control!"

"Yes. They certainly seem to be," Krang mused. The gleam in his eye said that he was far more pleased than he would let on. "Then let's not waste any time, shall we? Get on with finishing off your old mentor and then we will de-mutate the Turtles."

Shredder actually seemed to frown as he looked to Splinter. "It's almost a pity that we can't have one final battle," he mused. "One that I would win, of course. It seems so anti-climatic to simply kill him."

"I know you like to have your fun," Krang grumped, "but that's what usually ruins our plans. You could fight him now, but would it really be much of a challenge when you would already know every move he would make?"

"No," Shredder relented. "You're right, Krang. I will end his life now."

Baxter froze in terror. He knew this was the moment that he needed to do something, but it was almost impossible to make himself move. He didn't want to die, or end up suffering another fate worse than death, and yet, could he really just cower here and watch them destroy someone who had actually extended kindness and trust to him?

The old him, the honest him, never would have. But he had seen and done so much since then and had become a completely different, dishonest person. He still wasn't sure what kind of a person he was now. A self-serving coward seemed the most likely answer.

Did that mean that his vow to Raphael had been all talk, just as Raphael had thought? Did it mean he would end up letting all of the Turtles and Splinter down, even after their discussion that morning? Could he even do much to help them anyway?

April didn't have the same debate pounding through her veins. She ran out in a blaze of fury. "You won't hurt Splinter as long as I'm around!"

Everyone looked up with a collective start. "April O'Neil?!" Shredder roared. "How did she get here?! Dr. Stockman . . . !"

"Don't blame me for your oversight," Barney snarled. "Your precious mutants should have detected her."

"I knew you shouldn't have wasted time making those headbands to make them immune from the mesmerizer," Shredder shot back. "It would have been better to have just let them stay mind-controlled, for all the use they are!"

That actually made Baxter angry. Or maybe it was that plus the fact that Bebop and Rocksteady were too stupid to realize how they were constantly being used and not cared about. Baxter had scarcely put up with it at all, but Bebop and Rocksteady had endured it for years and quite happily would keep on enduring it because of their misplaced devotion to their boss.

But Baxter had very little intention of coming forward to defend the likes of them, especially if he wasn't brave enough to help Splinter. He still couldn't bring himself to leave the shelter of the console, not until he further saw how things would play out without his interference. Really, he wanted to believe that the Turtles and Splinter could break the mind-control all on their own. If anyone could, it would be them. Still, he could cite many times when they had needed a little help in their battles. And maybe April wouldn't be enough to do it this time.

"Nevermind, nevermind!" Krang exclaimed, waving his little arms. "Don't argue about your idiot mutants. Stop her!" He pointed to where April was running at the mesmerizer in the hopes of knocking it down and breaking it.

"Tell them to do it," Shredder said to Barney, indicating the nearest Turtles.

"Stop that woman," Barney commanded.

Instantly, Leonardo and Raphael went at April from both sides. While Leonardo distracted her, Raphael ran his sai through her sleeves and pinned her to the wall.

"Guys!" April cried in anguish. "You have to snap out of this! Leonardo, Raphael, it's me, April! Don't you recognize me?!"

They both gave her a blank look.

"Oooh, this is going to be so fun," Rocksteady exclaimed. "The Turtles are gonna thrash her!"

"Maybe you should have them get rid of Splinter, Boss," Bebop suggested.

"A very cruel and devious idea," Shredder smirked behind his mask. "But I want that pleasure for myself. The Turtles can murder Miss O'Neil, which is almost as cruel and devious. In fact, now I'm wondering if I should pit them against each other. The Turtles finishing each other off! What a delightful battle that would be to watch."

"Don't get carried away!" Krang snapped. "Stick to the plan, Shredder! De-mutate them! Don't leave them free to roam around and possibly have the chance to break the mind-control!"

"Ah, but they won't have that chance if Dr. Stockman's mesmerizer is everything he says it is," Shredder pointed out.

"And it is," Barney insisted, adjusting his glasses.

April tried to pull free of the weapons that were holding her fast to the wall. "You won't get away with this!" she screamed. "I won't let you!"

"You are hardly in a position to do anything, Miss O'Neil," Shredder said in delight. "This time there is absolutely nothing and no one to stop us. We will triumph!"

April's eyes burned. "I won't believe that!"

"Believe what you like. You can take it to your grave!" Looking to Barney, Shredder said, "I want to give the next order personally. Will they respond to me?"

"If I tell them to," Barney replied. Into the machine he said, "Turtles, obey Shredder's command."

Shredder turned to the Turtles. "Meet each other in battle in the next room," he ordered. "Leonardo and Raphael, and Donatello and Michelangelo. You will fight to the death!"

April stared in disbelieving shock and horror as the Turtles looked to each other with blank eyes. "You can't do it!" she wailed. "You're a team! You care about each other! You'd never forgive yourselves for this!"

This time the Turtles didn't even glance her way. Without another order, they weren't going to pay the least bit of attention to her.

Baxter was also staring in sickened alarm. There was no way around this, he realized with a sinking heart. He really seemed to be their only hope.

That was a frightening thought.

"Oh, but before you go, take care of Miss O'Neil for me, won't you?" Shredder leered. "See that she is no longer a problem."

Raphael pulled one sai free and held it over April's heart. But as he did, his eyes flickered and his hand trembled.

"What's going on?!" Krang cried. "Why is he hesitating? Dr. Stockman . . . !"

"It isn't my fault!" Barney snarled. "Bebop and Rocksteady would have killed each other had we not stopped their test in time!"

"You can't compare those idiots to skilled minds like the Turtles'," Krang retorted. "They have highly trained and honed willpower. When faced with a situation that they simply would not do, they will not do it, not even under mind-control!"

Shredder looked to Barney, his eyes sharp. "Well? Is that correct?"

"It depends," Barney admitted. "Normally that rule applies more to hypnosis. I suppose for especially strong minds, it could also apply to mind-control. But what some people don't know is how to get around mental barriers like that and trick them into doing it anyway."

Shredder folded his arms. "Show us."

Barney hesitated for only a brief moment before he spoke very quietly and carefully. "Raphael, listen to me. That is not April O'Neil. That is an imposter. You must kill her to save the real April. Do you understand me, Raphael?"

Something burned in Raphael's eyes and he brought the sai lower.

"No!" April screamed. "He's lying to you, Raphael! It's me! I came here to save you!"

Raphael trembled again, his free hand going to his head. "Can't . . . think," he choked out. "Everything's so messed-up. . . ."

"You don't have to think," Barney told him. "You only have to listen to me."

The situation hung in the air for an agonizing moment. Then, suddenly, it was Baxter's turn to run out into the scene. "Stop it, Barney!" he cried.

Barney spun around with a strange mixture of emotions written across his face. The most prominent was definitely hatred.

"I knew you shouldn't have left him alive!" Krang caterwauled.

"Get him!" Shredder roared.

Fighting to make a decision despite his altered state of consciousness, Raphael suddenly jerked his other sai free and turned, sending one of them directly at the mesmerizer. As the blade embedded inside, the machine sparked and shook and shorted out. The other Turtles and Splinter came to life.

"You're okay!" April cheered in delight.

"I . . . really don't know what just happened," Leonardo said in confusion.

"Yeah. Like, weren't we just in the Lair?" Michelangelo blinked.

"Let's worry about it later," Donatello exclaimed. "Look out!"

Bebop and Rocksteady were charging right at them, followed closely by Shredder.

"Alright, Turtles," Leonardo cried. "Let's do this. Turtles fight with honor!"

The two groups lunged and clashed. Alarmed, Krang stumbled back to be out of the line of fire. "No, no, no!" he screamed. "Not in here! You'll damage all the controls!"

Several keyboards were soon sparking in response to Krang's fears. A screen shorted out and burst, glass particles flying in all directions. The wall gained several new holes as the battle raged. Shredder's retro-mutagen ray gun clattered to the floor.

Barney was also trying to stay out of the fray. But he wasn't expecting the sight of Baxter dashing forward, swiping the retro-mutagen ray gun, and running for the nearest corridor. The hatred in Barney's heart spilled over and he gave chase, pulling a crowbar off the nearest console as he ran.

"This time, Brother, you've gone too far," he snarled. "I let you live before and this is how you repay me?"

"Do you really want to be an accessory to several murders?" Baxter exclaimed over his shoulder.

"You didn't seem to have any problem with the same thing in the past," Barney sneered. "You self-righteous hypocrite!"

"I only ever did that after I was pushed over the edge of sanity," Baxter said. "I know that now. You know as well as I do that I wanted to be honest!"

"I know that you've always been in my way!" Barney screamed. "You were always the one everyone noticed! At high school, at college, at local events . . . ! Even though you hadn't successfully invented anything that was patented, everyone knew you! You were able to make a name for yourself based around your degree! People were so impressed by your doctorate that they didn't care if you weren't an inventor! But if I ever tried to do the same thing, or to point out that I was a successful inventor, everyone told me that I was trying to be you! That was the last thing I wanted to be!"

With every rage-charged sentence, he swung the crowbar again. Although normally clumsy, this time Baxter seemed to be on high alert. From their shadows on the wall, he could see when Barney was lashing out again and he managed to swerve or duck each time.

"You're right that I played up my degree," Baxter shot back. "What else did I have to fall back on?! I couldn't invent anything that anybody wanted. I couldn't get a decent job! I didn't even have a real home. I was living in a factory! If I could escape reality for a few hours every now and then and pretend that I was important by making insignificant appearances at social gatherings, why wouldn't I do it?"

Barney was unmoved. "Excuses, excuses! What I wouldn't have given to have had that recognition! Instead, you always inadvertently took everything away from me. I had to fight and fight for anything that was truly my own."

"I never tried to hurt you!" Baxter snapped.

"I realize that. But I'm fed up with you all the same!" Barney leaped forward, striking downward with the crowbar, and Baxter barely managed to drop and roll in time. Then he stumbled up, frantic to get away as he crashed into the wall and practically flew down the corridor. If Barney could see his eyes, they were filled with unbridled terror. Barney had snapped, just as Baxter had feared might happen.

Barney stuck right with Baxter, continuing his hateful spiel while they ran. "I had an educational television series for a short while, but it was cancelled. They said it was because it wasn't as 'fun' as another science program that had run for years, but I always wondered if it was really because I wasn't you.

"I worked for anyone who would hire me. Most of the time I had to deal with being told that they really wanted you! I wanted to refuse them for that, but I needed the money so I didn't dare.

"I got sent to prison for working for one of those people. Do you know what prison is like, Brother Dear?! To be trapped in a tiny cell with someone who has less brains than a caveman when you're one of the most brilliant minds the world has ever seen?"

"I've been in prison plenty of times!" Baxter shot back. "Maybe not the kind with physical bars, but every bit as terrible. And I do know what it's like to be trapped in an insane asylum when you're not even insane yet, and to have no one to talk to who'll believe your outrageous claims except some lunatic who thinks he's Napoleon Bonaparte!" He ducked another swing of the crowbar. "You left me in that state, Barney! I begged and I pleaded for you to do something to get me out of there, and you wouldn't! You were so eager to have me out of your life that you were willing to have me put away for something I didn't even do!"

"How did I know whether or not you'd unleashed those stupid Mousers all over the city?" Barney snapped. "It sounded just like you, to not think about all the people who could be hurt or killed if they just munched their way through Manhattan!"

"It sounds more like you," Baxter said bitterly, his voice tinged with hurt. He ducked under a half-descended ceiling door into another room. "I thought about it. I knew that if they were controlled properly, no one would have to be harmed. I told Shredder all about how to operate them. I was foolish and idiotic and I trusted him! I had no idea what he really wanted or that he was setting me up for the fall!"

"Oh yes, and so we come to Shredder." Barney chased him into the new room. "Now I finally found someone who wants me and not you, and you're deliberately trying to take that away from me! Well, Brother, that's the last straw. I've had enough! I hate you! I hate you!"

Baxter was moving a bit slower by now, both from tiring of the long chase and from the disorientation of ducking under the strange door. Barney wasn't as disoriented. It didn't take much for him to draw close enough again to reach out and swing the crowbar. This time Baxter wasn't quick enough to dodge. It hit its mark and he froze for a split-second before collapsing to the floor. The gun clattered out of his hand.

The crowbar also hit the floor, falling from Barney's now-shaking hand. The anger had abruptly passed at the realization of his actions. Now he was in horrified disbelief. He had put up with what he felt were the injustices against him for so many years, throwing temper tantrums that expressed his inner rage and hinted at his demons. Today he had felt pushed into actually acting on those feelings. And had he done something irreparable? It was one thing to talk about his brother ending up dead for his interference in this scheme. It was quite another to actually try to go through with it.

The memory of a horrible day in their childhood flashed back to him. He had felt even then that Baxter was always the favored one. Something Baxter had done that day had spiked Barney's outrage and he had chased Baxter all over the woods around their property, threatening to harm him, until finally Baxter had tripped over a tree root and gone down. When he hadn't immediately got up, Barney had become frightened, fearing his brother was dead and he would be blamed. Not knowing what to do, he had stayed there, trying to rouse Baxter and pleading for him to not be dead.

Baxter had awakened after a few minutes, dazed and leery and even frightened of his brother. And, Barney recalled in chagrin, he hadn't displayed any open relief that Baxter was alright. He had just said something flippant about how angry their parents would be and asked if Baxter would tell them the truth. Baxter had said he wouldn't.

He had kept his word; he hadn't ever told. But even though things had never been very good between them, that had been the day when the actual rift had started. Baxter had always tried to avoid Barney after that. And, Barney realized sadly, he had liked it. It was so much easier to try to go his own way without Baxter always underfoot.

Their parents hadn't really noticed. They had just been relieved that the fighting had stopped. And so the family had grown up that way, quietly dysfunctional, until the two boys were men and had left to pursue their scientific dreams.

Today Barney had snapped again, just as he had back then, and this time when Baxter had fallen, it had been deliberately done at Barney's hands instead of the result of an inadvertant accident with something in his path. And this time, he probably wasn't going to get up.

"Oh Baxter," Barney whispered, "what have I done?"

He gathered up the gun before kneeling next to Baxter and taking his wrist, feeling for a pulse.

"Well?"

He turned with a start at the sound of Krang's voice. "Well what?" he retorted.

"Is he dead?!" Krang snapped.

This time Barney did not hesitate with his response. "Yes."

Krang started to smile. "Good. You truly are different from your brother. It's just like Cain and Abel. I never wanted to work with an Earth scientist, but I might still have use of you yet, even if the Turtles do get away."

"I knew you would," Barney smirked. He stood and stepped in front of Baxter's limp form. "I will dispose of him later. We should secure the Technodrome; that battle is getting ridiculous."

"Then let's go," Krang said abruptly. He turned, stomping down the hall. "We have to get to the control room."

Barney hesitated, looking back at Baxter once more. "Don't come back here, Brother," he whispered under his breath. "I just put both our lives on the line with my lie."

With that, he hastened after Krang.

He wasn't expecting April to run out in horror and shock right after they left. "Dr. Stockman!" She knelt down by Baxter's lifeless body, the outraged fury coursing through her veins.

Then Donatello was in the doorway, pushing the door upward so it wouldn't have to be ducked under. "We have to get out of here," he exclaimed. "The Technodrome is unstable from all the fighting and the portal likely won't be available for very long. I'm trying to get it open and it keeps flickering on and off."

If April really processed his words, she didn't acknowledge them. "Barney just murdered his brother!" she cried.

Donatello went stiff. "What?!"

"I saw Baxter take the retro-mutagen ray gun and run out of the room," April explained as Donatello hurried over. "Barney followed him, waving a crowbar! I couldn't get out of the room to follow them and see what happened next, but when I finally did and caught up, I heard Krang asking if Baxter was dead and making it obvious that Barney did it!"

Donatello's stomach rolled. "We'll have to take him with us right now," he said. "There's no time to see anything about him here." Quickly he bent down, scooping Baxter's body into his arms.

"I didn't even know he came after us until he jumped out to try to get Barney to stop mind-controlling all of you," April said as she and Donatello ran back towards the room with the portal. "He must have been hiding somewhere in the room."

"Whatever he was doing, he came through when we needed him," Donatello said quietly. "And he paid for it, just as he was probably afraid he would."

They got back in the other room, where Bebop, Rocksteady, and Shredder were sprawled and dazed on the floor and the portal was sparking and flickering as it threatened to fade out.

"We have to go, now!" Leonardo exclaimed. Then, noticing Baxter, he exclaimed, "What happened?!"

"Barney killed him, according to April," Donatello said grimly.

A collective "What?!" came from the other three Turtles.

Splinter stepped forward, his expression grim. "We must go, as Leonardo has said. This is not the time or the place to deal with this tragedy."

April quietly nodded. "Let's go."

The Turtles and April leaped into the portal just as it fizzled and died behind them. The other end came out back in the old building, where they unceremoniously landed in a confused heap.

Splinter was the first to recover. He knelt on the cold floor and looked to the others. "Is everyone alright?"

"Everyone except Baxter," Donatello answered. He knelt as well and laid Baxter on the floor with his head resting against Donatello's lap. Of course, there was no movement.

"So he won't even get the chance to start over," Michelangelo said sadly.

"He did start," Splinter quietly responded. "And he proved that he truly had begun to change. His honest self was still present."

Raphael turned away, gripping his sai. "I never thought I'd owe anything to him," he muttered, his voice thickening. "I didn't even think we could depend on him in a crisis. And he sure took his sweet time doing anything. Why did it take him so long?"

"Fear, perhaps," said Splinter. "It took courage just to determine to involve himself before the trouble actually happened, but when it came time to actually make good on his words, he may not have been able to handle it."

"Just like I thought would happen," Raphael muttered.

"Only he did not allow himself to remain crippled by his fears," said Splinter. "He followed through on his vow."

"Just like I didn't think would happen," Raphael conceded.

"What he did was very important," Leonardo said gravely. "He provided the necessary distraction so you could break free of Barney's mind-control and save all of us."

"I wonder why he took the retro-mutagen ray gun," Raphael said with a faint shrug.

"Probably just to get it away from the bad guys," Michelangelo spoke up.

"You don't think he was going to use it on all of you, do you, Raphael?" April exclaimed.

Raphael flinched. ". . . No. Not anymore. And that's weird to think about. He would have done it just a few days ago."

"When he was consumed by hatred and madness in his nightmarish transformation," said Splinter. He reached over to lift Baxter's limp wrist onto his chest. But then, instead of letting go, he paused and looked to Donatello and April. "Did you make certain he was dead?"

"No," April blinked in surprise. "Barney said he was dead. And then there wasn't any time to check because we had to hurry and go."

"Why, Sensei?" Donatello asked in confusion.

"His pulse is strong. He is alive." Splinter released his wrist.

That brought Raphael around with a start. "What?!" He stared, his eyes wide. "How could he be alive?! Was it an oversight?!"

"Barney could not have missed it," Splinter said gravely. "He would have checked for a pulse."

"Then . . ." April's eyes widened. But before she had a chance to finish her thought, Baxter groaned and stirred.

"Oh, what happened?" He raised a hand to his head. "I remember running away . . . oh." He opened his eyes and they were disillusioned and dark. "Barney tried to kill me."

"I do not know whether that was truly his intention or if he was reacting in temporary anger to your reappropriation of the retro-mutagen ray gun," Splinter said. "But he lied and told Krang you were dead."

"What?!" Baxter sprang upright and then cringed, falling backwards into Donatello's arms. "But . . . why . . ." He held a hand to the throbbing spot on his head. "Krang wouldn't have punished him if he had told the truth, not if Barney was trying to kill me. . . ."

"But Krang would have either finished the job himself or ordered Barney to do it," Splinter said. "It is obvious now that Barney lied in an attempt to save your life. And by so doing, he placed himself in grave danger."

"Oh wow," Michelangelo gasped in realization. "If they ever find out he lied . . . !"

"He'll be dead," Leonardo grimly finished.

"So we should feel bad for him?" Raphael frowned. "He hit his own brother in the head with a blunt instrument. Even if he wasn't trying to kill, he knew Baxter would get hurt. You can't pull any insanity card with him. Trying to correct his mistake and putting himself in danger for it is just about the kind of consequence he deserves."

"Perhaps you are right, Raphael," said Splinter. "But consider that if Shredder and Krang learn of his lie, they may very well also come after Baxter to finish what was started."

"Yeah," Michelangelo said, his tone hushed.

Baxter looked stricken. "I'll have to get out of New York, take on a whole new identity. I can't put Barney in danger by staying and risking Shredder finding out he lied. Maybe it was the consequence he deserved, but he actually was trying to help me. He could have told the truth and let Krang murder me if he was only concerned about himself." His voice took on a far-away tone as he went on, "I never would have thought he'd care about me that much. . . ." He trailed off, gazing into the distance.

"You should lay low for a while," Splinter agreed, "but you should not have to leave New York. Shredder knows nothing of your apartment. Move into it and try to quietly reestablish your normal life. We will invent a cover story for your and Barney's survival, should Shredder ever learn that you live."

Michelangelo nodded. "Like, maybe we could say that Donatello figured out how to bring you back from the dead, just like Dr. Frankenstein!"

Donatello cringed. "Or maybe we could just say that we got him to a hospital and the doctors were able to get him back even though he was clinically dead. That happens a lot these days, you know. No Dr. Frankenstein needed."

"Yeah . . . but the mad scientist stuff makes it a whole lot creepier," Michelangelo said.

Baxter grimaced. "Let's just stick with more conventional ideas." He looked worried again. "If they believe Barney can commit fratricide without batting an eye, who knows what they'll want him to do next! They'll believe he's capable of anything!"

"I fear you are right," Splinter frowned. "He is in grave danger whether or not they learn that he lied."

"So what can we do about that?" Raphael said in frustration. "He made his own choice to join up with those creeps."

"And he is obviously in over his head," Splinter replied. "He will most likely regret his decision to join them. He may already wish he hadn't. For now, there is likely little we can do. But we will try our best to monitor the situation and look for a way to help him leave their employ, if he so wishes."

"Maybe he could even help us while he's there," Michelangelo suggested. "Like, as a spy or something."

"He would never want to do that," Baxter objected. "And I wouldn't ask him."

"We will worry about that later," Splinter said. "Right now, you should be examined by a doctor and then rest. Your brother hit you hard enough to render you unconscious for several long moments."

April nodded. "You sure looked dead."

"But we're really glad you're not, Dude!" Michelangelo declared.

Baxter looked over at him. "You are?"

"We all are," Leonardo said firmly, and Donatello, Splinter, and April nodded in agreement.

Raphael looked trapped. Finally he sighed. "Oh, alright. I am too."

"He means it," Leonardo insisted.

"Yeah. You didn't hear him when we thought you'd bit the big one," Michelangelo added.

Raphael scowled. "Michelangelo . . ."

Baxter looked to each of them, humbled and astounded. They actually cared if he lived or died. They wanted him alive. He had never thought he would experience that, not even from his own brother. And in spite of Barney's anger, he had apparently shown that he felt the same way.

"Thank you," Baxter said quietly. "Thank you all."

"No," said Splinter. "Thank you for finding the courage to do something you didn't want to do."

"Well," Baxter said in some embarrassment, "Barney forced my hand."

"But you didn't have to do anything about it," April insisted. "You cared enough about your brother to not want him to ruin himself. And maybe you didn't want the Turtles and Splinter to get hurt either, after they've helped you."

"I didn't," Baxter admitted.

It was strange to think that he still had that much goodness left in him. Or that he cared about those who had helped to ruin his life. They hadn't had anything to do with his transformation, it was true. But they had helped convict him in the first place. The entire city had turned against him after the Mouser incident. Shredder had put his name on each one so that he would be blamed for whatever trouble they caused.

Of course, he hadn't realized that then. He had thought it was because Shredder was marketing his product, as he had said he was going to do. And he had thought that Shredder would come forward and help him when he was on trial because of the Mousers and undergoing psychiatric examinations for his claims about giant Turtles. Instead, he had been left to himself.

Barney had turned against him too, not wanting to be associated with someone considered so notorious and thought to be insane. That would have seriously damaged Barney's chances of becoming well-known for his own merits. That was what Barney had said when he had come to see Baxter in secret. He had stormed out ordering Baxter not to contact him again.

Baxter had spent many days and weeks in the insane asylum trying to figure out where he had gone wrong. Eventually he had decided that Shredder had not come to help him because he had told the Turtles about their partnership and the hideout. He had failed a trust, and naturally Shredder would not help him.

Barney was a different story. In spite of their rocky life together, Baxter had honestly thought Barney would help him. The worst blow in the entire mess had been Barney's refusal. He must have been delighted to have Baxter out of the way, but even that hadn't rocketed him to the fame he felt he deserved.

Years ago, he had grown his hair out in defiance, wanting to look as little like his respectable brother as possible. In the asylum, Baxter had allowed his hair to grow into the same style, perhaps out of defiance as well. They were brothers, and Barney couldn't just sweep it under the rug and forget about it. By now Baxter actually preferred his hair long. He had to wonder if Barney would change his hairstyle again to look different.

By the time Shredder had actually come to get Baxter out, it had been the darkest point in his life. He had fallen at Shredder's feet, calling him "Master" and saying he had failed. He had been so desperate to get out of the asylum after being told for months that he was insane and spending his days with people who thought they were Napoleon Bonaparte and George Washington. And he had felt bitter and hateful towards the Turtles, blaming them more than Shredder for his incarceration since they were supposedly the "good guys," yet they had left him to suffer. Helping Shredder go after them had sounded delightful in his state. Anything had sounded better than being stuck in there.

"Dr. Stockman?"

He started and looked to Splinter. Somehow during his thought process, they had all left the building and were now in the van, heading towards the heart of the city. He had known that in the back of his mind, but he had focused the most on what he was thinking.

"Are you alright?" Splinter asked.

"Yes," Baxter sighed. "I was just thinking. Barney called me a hypocrite when I tried to stop him from becoming an accessory to murder. I wonder if he was right."

"I don't follow," Michelangelo frowned.

"Well, you know that on several occasions I helped Shredder with plans that I knew could fatally harm you if they succeeded. And when I stole the Eye of Sarnoth, I did some of that on my own. It only happened all the more after my transformation. Even if I was out of my mind, that doesn't make it right."

"You sure seemed pretty out of it when you were chasing us with your economy-size Ratcatcher and cackling about giant talking Turtles," Michelangelo said. "Sure it doesn't make it right, but it's also not the same thing as just being sane and evil, like Shredder and Krang are."

Leonardo and Donatello nodded. "And anyway, now that's all in the past," Leonardo said.

"Wanting to stop your brother from making similar mistakes is not being a hypocrite," Splinter added. "It is showing that you learned from your experiences."

"And did I really?" Baxter wondered. "I still get angry when I think about you taking all of my belongings."

The Turtles looked at each other. "We really weren't fair to you on that first meeting," Leonardo admitted. "We were so new to going after criminals then and we never tried to get your side of the story. We just figured you were working for Shredder and that you knew all about him."

"But you'd just come from Splinter being hurt by Shredder," April objected. "You were protective and angry. Naturally you'd feel that keeping Splinter safe was the most important thing above worrying about a probable henchman's feelings."

"And that's pretty much what you said earlier, Leonardo," Raphael reminded.

"That doesn't make it right," Leonardo said, deliberately echoing Baxter's words.

Donatello nodded. "Baxter might have become our ally if we had been willing to listen to him back then."

"There are many sides to the story, just as I have taught you," Splinter said.

Raphael sighed, looking to Baxter. "I still get angry when I think about the things you did to us, both before and after your transformation." He folded his arms. "Maybe those things in our pasts will always be upsetting to us. But . . . maybe Michelangelo's right, that you're not the same guy who did all those things. And . . . maybe we've grown up some too. I'd like to think that we're better at listening to all sides of a story than we were back then. Or at least, maybe the others are. I've probably still got a long way to go."

". . . Wow, Raphael," Michelangelo said after a moment. "You actually admitted to your shortcomings? That's like, mondo unlike you."

"Hey, we spent a lot of this day being really unlike ourselves," Raphael muttered.

"Anyway," Leonardo interrupted, "we never really said it before, but we should say it now, even though it doesn't make up for the past. We're sorry, for everything we did that wasn't fair to you."

Baxter looked down. He had never thought anyone would apologize to him for anything. That was one more surprise for that day.

"I'm sorry too," he said. "Maybe I wasn't treated right, by anyone, but I made my own choices. Even if I was out of my mind, I don't want to use that as an excuse. I did things that I shouldn't have done, that I never would have dreamed of doing back in high school or college. When I look back at my life since then, I can see it became a complete disaster. But I have a chance to start fresh and I want to take it. I really don't want to be involved in your fight, but with Barney working for Shredder, it's my fight as well. I will do what I can to help you."

"Alright!" Michelangelo cheered.

"Thank you, Dr. Stockman," Splinter said sincerely. "And we will do our best to keep you safe from Shredder's wrath."

"Which we would have done anyway," Michelangelo was quick to add.

"I realize that now," Baxter said. "You're so much different than I believed you were."

"We could say the same about you," Leonardo said. "We thought you were just Shredder's right-hand man and as unapologetically evil as he is."

"I never would have thought you'd do anything decent," April agreed.

An uneasy look passed over Baxter's face. "I kidnapped you at least once, didn't I? And I have a faint memory that I did it again after I merged with the fly."

"You sure did," April nodded. "And the latter was one of those occasions when you tried to 'fatally harm' the Turtles!"

Baxter gave a weary groan. "I'm sorry. . . ."

April sighed. "At least it is all in the past, like Leonardo said. What you did today proves you deserve another chance."

"Hey, coming to think about it, how were you able to get into that bank yesterday without anybody making a big deal out of it?" Michelangelo blinked. "Isn't the insane asylum still looking for you?"

"I hope not," Baxter frowned. "While I was working for Shredder, I was able to move around town quite freely. I even managed to volunteer my services at that free pizza contest without any backlash from anyone."

"That's right," Leonardo said in surprise. "But why? Didn't they know about the Mouser incident and that you'd escaped from the asylum?"

"I don't know what they thought," Baxter said. "The Mouser incident was all over the news, but my escape apparently wasn't. Maybe by then most people had forgotten about me. And my parents might have stepped in to keep my escape quiet. They wouldn't have wanted any further tarnish on the family name, after all."

"Or perhaps they pointed out that the giant Turtle sightings were quite frequent and that therefore, you were not insane for talking about seeing them?" Splinter suggested.

"Possible, but unlikely," Baxter frowned. "They didn't do anything to help me before, just like Barney didn't."

"Back to the bank, didn't anyone ask where you'd been?" April wondered.

"Yes. I simply said I had been very ill and had been somewhere far away. It wasn't really inaccurate."

"No, it wasn't," Leonardo agreed.

"Anyway, though, even if I am not actively being sought, I'm probably still thought of as guilty for the Mouser disaster by the majority of the city," Baxter sighed. "If I'm remembered at all."

"I think by now most people realize it was Shredder, just like you tried to say," April said kindly.

"That's a nice thought, Miss O'Neil." Baxter looked weary. "But even if people know, it's too little, too late, just like how I wasn't released from the asylum even after they realized the giant Turtles were real."

"So what about your parents?" Michelangelo asked. "What are they like?"

"They care about reputation above all else," Baxter hmphed. "Both of their sons becoming scientists instead of high society playboys wasn't what they expected or wanted."

"So you don't want to contact them either?" Raphael did not look impressed. "What a happy, normal, American family."

"They never lifted a finger to help me," Baxter said bitterly. "The only thing they cared about was saving face when both Barney and I fell into wrong paths."

"I'm sorry," Donatello said in sobered chagrin. "That would be tough on anybody."

"But they must care on some level," Leonardo persisted. "All the money in those trust funds. . . ."

"So that we would stay away and not beg them for money," Baxter explained. "And even at that, we weren't allowed to touch the money until our circumstances became dire."

"I would call this dire," Raphael proclaimed. "One son in need of starting over, the other one trying to take over the world. . . ."

"Well, like I said, the rules have been relaxed now," Baxter said. "I have access to my money whenever I need it."

"And based on the condition of just coming back," Splinter mused. "Perhaps you should see your parents. It sounds as though they came to just want to see you safe."

"Maybe," Baxter said slowly. "I'll need some time to think about it. I don't know what I'll even tell them about where I was. Barney and I mutually agreed not to mention anything about my transformation to them. At least I had enough of my wits about me to realize that would have been a horrible idea. And how will I tell them what Barney's doing now, if they ask?"

Michelangelo winced. "Yeah, that sounds like a real sticky situation, Dude."

"But I am certain you will decide what to do," Splinter said.

"I really don't have the best track record for making decisions," Baxter frowned.

"No, but you made some good ones today," Leonardo said firmly.

Baxter tried to smile at that. Maybe he actually had. And maybe it was a sign of good things to come. At least, he could certainly hope it was. Even just hoping was more than he had done for a long time.