Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Just borrowing these amazing characters.
They say that time's supposed to heal ya
But I ain't done much healing
(Hello – Adele)
...
The frantic tapping sound made Hermione look up. Minerva's owl was hammering her beak against the window pane like a maniac. Hermione got up quickly and took the letter from the owl before the glass would crack. The Scottish witch asked her to come to meet her in office today. Hermione wasn't thrilled at all. She had planned to spend the day with her book and, hopefully, figure out what to do about Bellatrix, but she knew there was no use in ignoring Minerva. The witch was stern. So she made her way to Hogwarts.
...
The office was painfully quiet. Classes were in full swing and so the corridors were swept empty of student's chatter that would usually penetrate through the door. Normally it would bother her, but today Minerva regretted the absence of it. She could do with some distraction from her own thoughts. Occasionally she had thought to seek Bellatrix out, but discarded that idea quickly. What was she supposed to say after what she had done? And what had she even done? The dark witch hadn't exactly told her off. You couldn't deny she had enjoyed it. At least that's what Minerva kept telling herself. In reality she was so afraid to learn that Bellatrix didn't feel the same about their encounter that she had changed her nightly hunting route, so she wouldn't run into her again.
She shifted her thoughts to the conversation that lay ahead of her; unfortunately it didn't brighten her mood, but she needed to be in the loop of things as much as possible.
There was a knock at the door.
"Come in" Minerva said more seriously than she had intended. Hermione walked in and the image of the young witch didn't light up her mood like it usually did. Minerva tried to be polite and offered her a seat and the obligatory cup of tea.
Hermione had noticed the stern tone in Minerva's voice. She wondered what she was in for and she didn't like that feeling at all. She liked Minerva a lot, but it was difficult to get past the student-teacher relationship sometimes.
"I haven't heard from you in quite a while. I was worried for you, Hermione" Minerva said. I was worried Bellatrix told you, Minerva thought.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I completely forgot."
"Am I right in assuming that your adventures are over then?" They better be.
"Yes, definitely." If you tell me how to get that witch off my mind.
"And did you find out what you were looking for?" How far did you go with her?
"Yes, you could say that." I'm more confused than I was before.
"That's good to hear." Good to hear we're not shagging the same woman.
The young witch looked questioningly at Minerva. "That's it? You're not going to try to persuade me to join your staff?" she asked.
"Oh, I know a lost cause when I see it. It's clear you're not very interested in teaching and that's fine. You need to find your own path, Hermione." You need to stay away from me or I'm going to lose it.
"Yeah, I don't think it's the right thing for me. I'm just glad to hear you're fine with it. I feared it might stand between us if I declined."
"God no. Don't worry about it. Everything's fine. If you will excuse me now?"
"Yes, of course" Hermione said a little irritated.
The witches parted and Minerva closed the door in relief. The young witch caused some unpleasant feelings in her. Was it jealousy? Or hurt pride? She just didn't like when other people touched what she considered her's.
...
The conversation with Minerva had left Hermione quite irritated. The witch had been so keen to get her to teach at Hogwarts that she had not expected her to drop the topic so easily now. She had also acted colder towards her than she usually did. Maybe she was mad that she declined the offer after all? Hopefully that was going to pass. She really couldn't bother with that now. She was however happy that the witch believed her when she said she wouldn't have any more "encounters". Minerva would have wanted to know what she was up to eventually.
...
Bellatrix' moment of clear-headedness had unfortunately been just that; a moment, one among many. Desperation was ever so present as her life crumbled in front of her eyes. For the first time in many years she stopped fighting against herself and let memories come and go. She remembered the day her parents found out she had been dating Cara, a girl, on top of that a Mudblood as they liked to say. She remembered the day she had packed all of her belongings and was ready to leave her family forever. For hours she had waited in the dark until she had to admit to herself that she had been stood up. It had been an excellent opportunity for her pureblood-supremacist family to convince her of the Dark Lord's cause. Her father's words ringed in her ears as if it was yesterday.
See, Bellatrix, these people are evil through and through. They have no respect for us and only use us for their own personal gain. I know you're hurt right now, my little girl, but sometimes you have to experience things for yourself to understand.
She thought she did understand back then. She had been determined to become the best witch in the country and fight all of these foul creatures. It had been a perfect opportunity to revenge herself for Cara's betrayal. At least that's what it had been at the beginning. As the years went on and insanity took a hold of her, she forgot more and more why she was doing what she was doing. It became all about mayhem; a perfect way to flee from herself. Some time after the war she started to feel disgusted by her actions. As the world became quieter a tiny voice in her mind became louder, questioning her actions and reasons, telling her how foolish it was to hate all half-bloods and muggle-borns. She was smarter than that. The fact that her original reason to join "the cause" had been a complete lie made her feel even worse.
However, in the course of this week Bellatrix had at least come to one conclusion: She needed Narcissa. She was still angry at her, but she needed her nonetheless. She couldn't navigate herself through this maze on her own. And despite the fact that her sister had lied to her for so many years, she was still the only one who had never truly left her side.
Reluctantly she took Lennard from her stomach, who was sleeping peacefully, and got out of bed. She had not moved for such a long time that her body felt incredibly heavy. But there was a conversation that needed to be held.
...
By the look on Narcissa's face Bellatrix knew she looked a mess, which was no surprise after these past days. She was in desperate need of a meal as well as some cleansing and glamour charms, but she really didn't care about her looks at all at the moment.
Narcissa rose from her seat, but remained standing still. All she really wanted to do was to scream I am sorry, but sometimes sorry doesn't mean a thing. So she said the second thing that had come to her mind when her sister arrived.
"I thought you would never want to see me again" she said.
"And only a few years back that would have been the case" Bellatrix said seriously. "And I might have spent some time crucioing you" she added.
Narcissa shuddered at the truth of these words. "And why don't you now?" she asked.
The dark witch took a deep breath, her inner struggle written all over her face. "I love you. I've wasted too many years of my life with hatred." She shrugged her shoulders in surrender. "And … I'm lonely" she whispered. "I need you, Cissy. I'm angry, but I need you."
The blonde was speechless. Never had her sister been so forward with her emotions. She could only imagine how hard that had to be for her.
"I love you, too, Belle" she breathed, tears threatening to spill.
The older sister had to wipe away a few tears of her own.
"You have to tell me something, though" she said.
"Anything."
"Why? Why didn't you tell me sooner?"
"Well, when they realized that I had witnessed the … murder, father made it very clear to me that I was not to speak of it to anybody ever." Narcissa felt a lump constricting her throat. "You know he had his ways" she added quietly. "I was scared."
Oh yes, Bellatrix knew he had his ways. For how much her father hated Muggles he found rather great joy in their punishment techniques, beatings in particular.
"And then", Narcissa continued, "when our parents died, you were already in so deep that there was no reaching through."
Bellatrix knew that what her sister meant was You were already such an insane psychotic bitch and that was true. At some point she had lost all touch with herself and the people around her.
"I'm sorry, Belle, I really am." Narcissa carefully took her sister's hand and was surprised when she found no resistance at all.
"What did they do with her body?" Bellatrix asked.
Narcissa noticed the slight shaking in her sister's voice, but unfortunately this was a question she couldn't answer.
"I don't know" the blonde said apologetically.
"Great" Bellatrix crossed her arms and started to pace. She dug the nails of her right hand into her arm to keep control of her emotions. "I just want to say goodbye" she said, her voice thick with emotion.
Narcissa stood there like a lost child. Seeing her sister like this was still new to her and she didn't always know how to deal with it. She wanted to comfort her, but sometimes she wasn't sure that her sister wouldn't snap back to her insane self any second. However, she did have an idea.
"Why don't you just apparate?" she asked.
"How on earth am I supposed to apparate when I don't know where to, dear sister?"
"Do you remember when we went home after my first year at Hogwarts and I got lost at the station? You started to panic and apparated to me just by thinking really hard of me."
"Yeah, I remember, but do you think that works with a … dead person?"
"I don't know. But it's worth a try, don't you think?"
"Yeah", Bellatrix nodded, "ok. Would you come with me?"
"Of course" the younger witch smiled.
Bellatrix took her sister's hand, closed her eyes and tried to bring the image of Cara to the forefront of her mind. After a few seconds she felt the familiar tugging of apparition.
...
Wind was whipping past her face, cool and fresh. She felt Narcissa's eyes on her, but she barely dared to open her own, afraid of what she might find. When she finally did open her eyes, she saw that they were at the seaside. It was beautiful here, really. It was nothing special; just the deep green grass, high cliffs and the sound of waves clashing against them with full force. Nature in its most raw and wild form.
She overlooked the area for any sign of a grave, but there was none. She let go of her sister's hand and carefully walked across the grass. Bellatrix was only a few meters away from the edge of the cliff when she came to a sudden stop. A shiver spread across her spine and an all-consuming warm feeling took over her body and heart. This was it. This was the grave. There was no visible indication, but she felt it. Two souls bound by love and separated by force would always recognize each other, even in death. Images flashed before closed eyes. Two hands intertwined, dark eyes meeting green eyes, soft lips finding soft lips, arms so slim holding her in an embrace so strong, young girl's laughter on a summer's day, words whispered into her ear under the night sky promising eternal love. Surrender brought her to her knees, fingers digging into the earth under which her love lay. Silent tears streamed down pale cheeks. Hands desperately moved earth aside.
"Bella? Bella!" a voice called unheard by the dark witch. Footsteps were quickly coming closer. Strong arms wrapped around her and tried to pulled her away with all force. Dark curls were buried in blond waves.
Narcissa held her sister tight and rocked her back and forth like a child as screams of pain were carried across the sea.
A/N: So, cookies for everyone who's reviewed I get really excited whenever s.o. reviews, so thanks! If you have any suggestions for the story, anything you would like to happen, please let me know and I'll see if I can incorporate it. Also, I realize I have taken some liberties here with Apparition, but you know what they say: It's my party and I'll apparate if I want to ;)
Dragul: Narcissa has slowly become one of my favourite characters as well. Definitly plan to keep her involved. And I just like to think that there is at least one person left who cares about Bella.
TiAdoro914: Thanks for the tip! I will also change that in the previous chapters eventually.
LthWolf: An Invisibility Cloak only makes you invisible, not soundless ;) Hermione was going through Bella's drawers.
weemle10: Aw, thank you! I'm afraid updates won't be very regular. I have a lot of stuff to do for Uni ….
Justine: Girl, are you trying to outdo yourself? Your reviews just keep getting better I like what you say about emotions vs. morals. That's where it gets interesting. What do you do when you feel something you don't want to or think you shouldn't feel.