Chapter 9: All dreams are shattered

||~MISSKIREI~||

I'd recommend listening to "Akane, by UxMishi" while reading the start of this chapter. UxMishi had performed this song in the episode 26 of Kaichou Wa Maid-Sama. You can find it on youtube.

Takumi stared at the LED TV hung on the wall opposite to his desk. The Walker Corporation was really sinking low in Asia. He had been working day and night, trying to improve the position of the company, but with the lazy pace his employees were used to, he doubted the success of his plan. The news channel had been showing the newest ratings and he wasn't very happy with what he had seen. If this kept up, his reputation was sure to turn to dust.

He had something to prove,

To Gerard. And more importantly,

To himself.

Takumi grit his teeth as he stared at the files lying on his desk. He was actually angry today. It had been a long time since he had felt any emotion other than his usual self-loathing. He decided to call up the team that had come from England to look into the matter. It was no use sitting here and frowning, he decided that it would be better to take a progress report from that team instead.

"Send Aaron and his team members to my office." He spoke into the phone as he took off his blazer and unbuttoned his shirt collar.

The news reporter's voice kept getting on his nerves and he decided to change to some random channel instead. Takumi started to put his files together after changing the channel. He had to make room for more files on his desk.

Some random Japanese music band had started to play on the TV as Takumi kept all papers in the right files and shut his laptop.

The music felt awfully familiar though, how long has it been since he had listened to Japanese music? It had been almost 8 to 9 years… He was never one to be fond of pop-rock music anyway, he had never even been to a musical concert except for once when he went to a school festival with Misaki.

Takumi stilled, how long has it been since then? He felt a rush of emotions in his heart as he faced the television set and saw the band performing a very familiar song.

The sky is falling madder
It soon another sad season
That afternoon
From the beginning I met you
Please remember to cut back at that time

He recognized Kuuga immediately, he had this crazy funky hairstyle now, that made him almost unrecognizable, but Takumi had good memory.

The music brought back memories with it that were so close to his heart, the times when he was so happy. Listening to the same words come out of Kuuga's mouth was like a slap to his face. Takumi smirked as he looked at the band members of UxMishi, they all had matured alright, he still remembered what all had happened in the school festival. It had been the best day of his life.

I was just lonely cheating painful

[Love] is now the only weakness

More are about to change with the strength in his chambers in my heart

Finally understand how I feel

Your heart that much again

Dreaming

Snow while walking our separate ways

He saw Kuuga winking towards a certain pink haired girl. What had been her name?

"Kura…Sakura…" Takumi felt the words come out of his mouth before he could stop himself. He started dumbfounded at the TV screen. Although Sakura's face was only slightly visible from the camera angle, his eyes caught her. Her pastel pink hair no longer were tied up in high pigtails. She had matured as well…

This is why he didn't want to come to Japan.

He was too close.

Too close.

To everyone.

Suddenly, flashes of faces of everyone he had met during high school started coming back. He had dived in her world to such an extent that her friends had become his friends, there was no distinction. He remembered the Student Council, the Maid latte, Misaki's family, her father, that awful insignificant boy… He had come too close to her entire world.

Why had he decided to come back?

He didn't want to fucking reminiscence. He wanted to move on.

He ran a hand through his hair as flashes of Minako Ayuzawa and Suzuna Ayuzawa painted their images in his mind. Takumi had always had a close relationship with the two, since they were quite fond of him.

But,

They must be hating him now.

Of course, after all he had done to her daughter, what mother wouldn't hate him?

His nerves were on fire, as he felt guilt, remorse and pain cover his entire being. He had destroyed his one chance, his one shot at a happy life. He had fucking messed up.

They all must hate him so much.

Takumi wasn't ever one to think much about what people thought of him, but this was a different case. These were the people who would give their life for Misaki,

Hell, he would have given up his own life for Misaki too,

But what he had done was the opposite…

He ran a shaking hand through his hair as he grit his teeth, he searched for the remote of the damn TV set as UxMishi songs kept playing over and over, deafening him, showing him things he didn't want to see, making him remember when all he wanted to do was forget.

Everything happened in a flash, Takumi picked up his diamond pen holder and threw it on the TV when he felt like he couldn't bear to listen anymore. He stared at the broken glass lying everywhere, to his luck, Aaron and his team had to knock on his door at the same moment.

He didn't care, he stormed out of the room without a single word.

Mia stood by the entry of his office, and stared with her wide eyes, the mess that he had made. Satomi kept a comforting hand on her shoulder but Mia didn't react, she kept staring at the broken shards, trying to find what made him mad this time.

Later that night, Mia went back to his mansion. She had decided to ask him what happened later today but all her plans were thrown out of the window. Takumi wasn't home.

Mia stared at the empty corridors that seemed to never end. She walked them slowly, touching the velvet red walls in the process. She looked up at the mini chandeliers hanging off the ceiling as she walked. The mansion seemed so dead without its owner. She wondered how long had such a beautiful place been abandoned.

Was she ever going to uncover the mystery behind Takumi? It seemed like a distant dream. With the pace their relationship was going on, she was sure that he was never going to open up to her.

She wanted to know things about him…She didn't want to know how many awards he had won or how many companies he had overthrown. She wanted to see his raw self, the demons that kept him awake, the nightmares that scared him, and the inspiration that fueled him to be better. There was so much to know, and so much to ask…

Mia found herself standing in front of the room in which Takumi had been staying. He had told her that there was a library down here somewhere too…strange, isn't it?

She remembered him telling her not to open a particular room when he had shown her around. What was in that room? It seemed to be a pretty ordinary room to her. What sounded stranger to her was the fact that he had never stayed in the mansion before yet he was very particular about not showing her that particular room. What was in that room that made him try to hide it from her?

She stood up from the sofa chair, she wanted to see what that room all about was. Hell, she didn't care if she made him angry or something. She'd explain.

And,

He wasn't home, so there was a pretty good chance that he wasn't ever going to find out that she had been in that room anyway.

Mia found some strength and guts as she swallowed her anxiety and got out of Takumi's room. She didn't have a very good memory of the mansion, so she'd have to look around until she found that room.

The rooms looked awfully similar from the corridors. At this rate, she would need a stupid map to go by! Mia pinched her forehead in frustration as she looked around. She walked slowly and cautiously, trying to remember where exactly had that room been.

She stilled when she heard small bells chime. Where did that sound come from? She knew that there was nobody around except for her, and all the maids were off duty as well.

Mia ignored those sounds and moved further into the living room on the first floor. It was pretty spacious and there were fresh flowers in many places kept in vases. Mia sighed, what was the use of keeping fresh flowers and cleaning the entire place even when nobody was there to stop and appreciate its beauty?

It seemed like the maids around here were more passionate about this mansion more than Takumi, Mia tsked. She didn't understand Takumi. How could he, who was so particular and organized in his professional life, be so careless in his personal life? It seemed as if he didn't care much about such things.

More like, he didn't have the time to care about such things.

Mia decided not to get sidetracked and moved on to the rooms. She found the library Takumi had been talking about. There was also a gymnasium and a Japanese styled room that was completely bare. There were traditional Japanese tables that she had seen in typical Japanese restaurants before but she didn't know why they were here. She should have asked her parents more about the Japanese heritage. At least, she should have known where she came from.

But it seemed like the room was more like a practice room for martial arts. That would explain why the room was bare and had Japanese scripted hangings on the walls. Did Takumi know martial arts as well? She laughed, he might as well.

With each room she explored, the more did Takumi start to look like a stranger. The Takumi that must have lived in this mansion didn't resemble the Takumi she knew. The Takumi she knew was very particular and much focused for his work, so focused that he threw away everything else. But, the Takumi who must have lived here looked like a fun person, who enjoyed and invested in various hobbies. He looked like someone who thoroughly enjoyed the flavors of life.

The more she tried to deduce about Takumi from this house, the more unpleasant did her Takumi started to look. Compared to him, her Takumi looked like a work robot.

What changed him? Mia felt like meeting the Takumi from this house now. Everything now seemed so unsettling to her…

She twisted the knob of another room, wondering what more would she found about Takumi. The door of the room was just like any other room. She twisted the knob, and heard a click sound. What would this room contain? If she was the one making this house, she wouldn't even have thought about having so many rooms!

"Mia?"

Mia stilled, who was that? The painfully absolute voice made it pretty clear, she sighed and almost panicked. Well, she hadn't done anything wrong, so there was no reason for her to be scared. She held herself high and turned around as she let go of the door knob.

"Takumi" She half smiled, "What's up?"

"What are you doing here?" He asked calmly as he ran a hand through his hair. Mia smiled, "Well, I decided to show up because I thought you weren't feeling well and needed someone to talk to. When did you come?"

"Just now." He answered looking at his watch, "Its almost midnight."

"Where were you?" She asked. Was it too personal?

No, she decided, if she wanted to know more about him, she'd have to start asking from the scratch.

"In a meeting." He replied.

Of course, in another boring meeting, Mia sighed, why was he so hard to talk to?

"What are you doing here?" he asked, again.

"I just told you…I—"

"I mean, in front of this room. I thought I told you not to go in?"

"Oh!" she laughed, "I got lost, was this that room? Every door is identical so I had no way of knowing…"

He didn't say a word.

Mia bit her lip, was he mad at her?

"I'm sor—"

"No, its okay. Did you eat something yet?" He asked as he turned around and walked towards his room.

Mia quietly followed him, she hadn't eaten anything, she was busy exploring… She couldn't tell if Takumi was plainly tired or angry inside. She decided to keep quiet and follow him instead of being nosy.

"You're awfully quite today, not your usual self." She heard Takumi say, they were in his room and he was taking off his blazer.

"No, you're not your usual self today." Mia said, she felt him stop doing whatever he was doing and chuckle, "What is my usual self?" She heard him say as he took off the cufflinks and unbuttoned the top few buttons of his shirt. Somehow, now, she could feel the meaning of his ambiguous words… True. What was his usual self? She didn't have an answer to that, but she decided to cheer him up anyway.

"You know, your usual awful self." She grinned.

"Awful, you say?" Takumi raised an eyebrow at her as he stopped unbuttoning his shirt and got comfortable.

"Of course, I was just looking around and realized how different you are from what you show yourself to be." Mia looked up at the ceiling as she sat on the edge of the bed with her legs dangling down.

"From what I show myself to be? I don't show myself to be anyone." Takumi shrugged as he sat next to her. He didn't know what to say or how to react to what Mia had said.

"Exactly." Mia cupped his cheek with an endearing smile. "I want you to show me what you are made up of. I want to know more."

"You know everything you'll ever need to know about me." Takumi said as he took her hand away from his face, "There isn't much to know, I'm sorry if I disappoint you, Kirei, but I've always been my boring self." He chuckled for a moment, never a smile, "There's no fun side to me."

"But this house speaks quite the opposite." Mia stood up, "You were the one who designed everything in this house, right? I looked around, Takumi. This place is a masterpiece."

"Should I say, thanks?" He joked as he laid flat on his back and used his arm as a pillow. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"I wish you would just stop putting me in circles with your words." Mia looked away as Takumi turned to the other side, "I'm sorry for not being an adventure, Kirei…"

Mia kept silent as she watched him close his eyes. He seemed tired tonight, so she didn't say much. She would have several other occasions to do so…

She watched his breaths become calm and rhythmic. He was fast asleep… Mia put the lavender comforter on him so that he didn't feel cold in the night. She kneeled down near the bed and watched him sleep peacefully, falling asleep right there.

He remembered the yellow sundress he had gifted her,

The blush on her face was worth everything he had owned. He would give up his entire being and surrender, just for that blush on her face. He had loved it when she would turn red upon his snide, perverted remarks about her figure when she had come out wearing that sundress. He felt so proud, because he was the one who had put that smile upon her face. He felt so happy, because he was the reason why her heart started to race suddenly. He could make her nervous, by just coming close to her. He had loved each and every thing about her being in love with him.

He was the luckiest bastard alive.

Literally.

He remembered how she had took his head in her own when they were at the beach,

She had started to run in the direction of the wind. She had teased him and challenged him for a race. He remembered how beautiful she had looked as she ran on the wet sand. He remembered how she had wet her dress because the wave washed over them whilst they played like kids.

He remembered how she had protested when he had taken off his own shirt and put it over her wet sundress. He remembered that feeling of possessiveness and anger surge through when the yellow sundress had gotten wet and become almost transparent. She had yelled at him, and told him that it wasn't a big deal. She had scrunched up her nose and told him that the only pervert on the beach was him, and assured him not to go crazy. He had laughed, and put the shirt on her.

She had blushed red when he walked by her side, in nothing but a pair of half-trousers. She had told him angry that because of him, she looked like an idiot. She had also admitted that she liked the sundress a lot. He remembered looking at her, mesmerized.

That day, he remembered when Misaki had gotten awfully silent when some girls came towards him. He hadn't noticed, obviously, because he had been busy looking at her. She had grown silent and looked away when the girls had started to give him stuff and ask for pictures.

He had politely declined.

He remembered how he had taken her away from all those people because all he wanted to do was be alone. He remembered kissing her, letting his emotions out. He remembered holding her hands above her head, pushing her against a tree, and taking off his shirt from her. He remembered telling her that she could flaunt the yellow sundress all she wanted, as long as nobody was watching. He remembered how the blush on her face was quite matching with the red flowers on the sundress. She had laughed and told him that she was never wearing this "stupid" dress again.

They both knew that it was a lie.

He remembered when she had suddenly kissed him out of the blue when he had been driving. Misaki's graduation was almost over, and Takumi had decided that he was going to ask her to move in with her. He remembered how shy she had been to initiate the kiss. He remembered the tightening in his throat when he felt like he couldn't even convey even half of the love he had for her. He remembered when she had told him that she was happy, to be with him.

He was the one to blush that day.

The red flowers of her dress were soon replaced by blood.

He remembered her cries of pain when Gerard had driven a knife through her. He remembered how he was consumed in rage. He remembered being helpless—tied in those stupid iron chains. He remembered watching her struggle, and fight. He remembered how she had thrown a couple of kicks and punches in Gerard's way that broke his nose. He remembered when he pulled Misaki's hair angrily and slammed it on the wall. He remembered her falling down. He remembered blood. He remembered screaming. He remembered shouting. He remembered tears. He remembered the boiling rage that he felt. He remembered realizing that there wasn't much he could do.

He remembered surrendering. He remembered realizing that there was no way he could be with her as long as his family was alive. He remembered how his mind had raced, how Gerard would have found out any other way to separate them, how the only way of her being happy was without him in her life. He remembered Misaki lying down unconscious on the dirty floor. He remembered Gerard laughing, and wondering if he had gone too far. He remembered saying that he would do anything that he wanted as long as she was safe.

He remembered sighing papers, making promises that he didn't want to make. He remembered Gerard saying that if he tried to get out of these promises, he would find Misaki again. He remembered kissing her forehead as she lay in her own blood. He remembered how he had punched Gerard when he was let loose. He remembered feeling so guilty, helpless, and miserable as he held her in his lap. He remembered how he had asked Gerard to leave him alone with Misaki, for a moment. A small moment.

He remembered his words, his tears, his heartbeat, the sweet nothings and the apologies he had whispered in her ears that were dead to the world. He remembered calling up his unlikely friend, Kanou Soutaro, from the med school.

He remembered that awful night vividly, how he had taken her to Kanou's private clinic with Gerard right behind him—watching with an amused grin on his face. Takumi had decided that he was wipe the floor with that grin someday.

He had held her wrist carefully as Kanou proceeded to clean up her wounds, even if he was not from the field. Kanou hadn't asked much questions, and he was grateful for that. Takumi had almost laughed in his own misery, "Remember how you wanted her to hate me back in high school. Today is your chance to take her away from me."

Kanou had kept silent the entire time. He was always one to work better in pressure. Takumi was thankful that he could at least take the pain of this incident from her memory, with his help. He knew he had to get out of her life, but it didn't have to leave a scar on her.

Kanou had told him that he could easily erase, or overwrite the incident from her memory since she had a concussion. It would be easy. He had asked Takumi to write down everything on a piece of paper and leave.

Takumi remembered kissing her for the last time, saying his goodbyes, apologizing, telling her that he'd find her in another life. He told her that he would be hers, in another life, and nobody would stand in his way. He told her that he'd keep all his promises and make her fall in love with him over and over again. He told her to keep smiling and be her own self, no matter what. He told her to be strong, and accomplish her goals. He told her that he wouldn't keep a watch on her, but he would go on, if she was happy in her own life.

He remembered Kanou telling him that he didn't have much time. He remembered writing with shaking hands on a piece of paper, all the lies that he wanted to tell Misaki. He almost laughed as tears blurred his vision, she would never be fooled by simple lies, so he had to make a strong case.

He gave the keys of his mansion to Kanou, telling him how it was a gift for her, how he had spent his time designing every single surface of the house, how he had made the house without the Walker money, how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her there…

He lastly remembered how pale she looked, lying still on the bed, with her clothes muddy and bloody. He remembered looking at her so that he wouldn't forget her, even in a thousand years. He remembered cursing himself for doing this to her. He remembered how happy Gerard had been, and how unsatisfied he had felt when he slammed his face on the trunk of his car.

He remembered everything, how he would scream in the middle of the night, how he sunk lower than he already had every single day, how he tried to move forward, how he tried to stay away as much as possible. How he would wake up with tears in his eyes and her name on his lips.

Just like he did now.

He realized he was in the same room as he had been a few hours ago. He realized he was covered in a lavender comforter. He realized that she was staring at him with tears in her eyes. He realized that she kept saying "Misa?" over and over again, mimicking his own words.

He ran a hand through his hair as he remembered he had a nightmare, after a very long time. With his blurred vision, it took him long to realize that the woman sitting in front of him wasn't Misa.

It was Mia.

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A/N: So guys, what did you think! Mia finally has a hint about Misaki. I apologize for not being able to update, but I hope this chapter was worth it. Let me know what you thought and stay tuned!