A knock at the door startled us back into reality.

I quickly slipped off of Aki and sat down on the stool with a whump just as the door creaked open, letting in the harsh white light of the hallway.

The nurse came in, bearing a small tray with a pill bottle and a glass of water. She looked at Aki and me questioningly, for we were both red-faced and out of breath yet trying to hide it.

"Mr Ayamatsu?" She asked, glancing at a folder lying on the tray.

"Yes?" Aki lifted his chin.

"May I speak to you in private?"

"That won't be necessary," Aki replied.

Again the nurse gave me a strange look and I, blushingly, turned my face to the floor. Aki reached his hand down from the covers and took mine. My eyes welled with tears. I felt blissful and miserable at the same time, and it hurt my stomach. My fingers clenched around Aki's hand.

"Okay, well, Mr Ayamatsu," the nurse began. "Your test results have come back and you have no internal injuries."

Aki nodded, as if had known that already.

"But you do have an infection that needs to be cleared up before it has time to worsen." She stepped forward and handed Aki two white pills. Aki took it, then hesitated when she tried to give him the water. But he released my hand and took the glass, thanking her.

"It might make you drowsy," the nurse added.

He tossed the pills into his mouth, took a swig of water, and tilted his head back as he gulped it all down.

My mouth turned wet watching him, his hair flowing behind him, his eyes closing only for an instant as he swallowed, a single drop of water escaping from his lips to roll down his chin.

Aki looked at me, the glass of water still in his hand. He offered it to me.

"No, no thank you." I said, waving it away, feeling flustered.

Aki looked at the nurse and held out the glass and she took it immediately. I then felt a bit foolish.

"Wh-what kind of infection does he have?" I asked the nurse.

Aki nodded at the nurse, granting her permission to speak.

"A urinary tract infection," she said rather distastefully.

"Oh," I mumbled. I wasn't enjoying the whole hospital situation.

"Will that be all?" Aki asked her.

The nurse glanced at her folder.

"No," she answered. "The doctor said I can unhook you now." She walked over to the heart monitor, and my own heart began to race.

"What are you doing?" I cried, jumping up from the stool. "Pulling the plug? You can't!"

The nurse paused, giving me a disgusted look.

"Seiji," Aki said, his voice so gentle and sweet that it stopped me flat in my tracks.

I looked at Aki and felt my face burning with embarrassment as I realized what she meant.

The nurse took Aki's hand and removed the monitor from his finger. Almost instantly, Aki's heart stopped beating on the screen and flatlined with a wailing, constant "bee-". The nurse turned to the machine and flipped and switch and it went silent. She gathered up all the cords and rolled the machine to the door.

"I'll be back to check on you in an hour. If you need me sooner, just press that button." She pointed to a red and white picture of a nurse imbedded into the bed's frame near Aki's head.

"Thank you," Aki said.

The nurse opened the door and started to go out, but then she looked over her shoulder and her rude stare flicked from Aki and lingered on me.

"Visiting hours are over at 8pm," she blurted all of a sudden.

I frowned at her, and she pursed her lips and quickly left the room. The door shut with a metallic clunk.

A few seconds of desolate silence passed.

I sat down on the stool, wondering how long I had been standing there.

Now there was not even the sound of the heart monitor to keep us company.

I stared at my knees and my hands that hung between them. I didn't know what to say. With Sono, there wasn't ever a need to fill the emptiness with words. We could simply be silent and understand each other just the same. But... With Aki, I didn't know what to do. Am I supposed to speak or be quiet? I wondered nervously. But he isn't talking, either. Is he enjoying the quiet, or does he feel as awkward as I do?

Suddenly the sheets began to rustle and I jerked my head up to see Aki trying to get out of bed. For a hopeful and gut-wrenching moment, I thought he was getting out of bed so he could come over and kiss me, and the very thought sent my neck prickling with sweat. But then he spoke.

"I have to use the restroom," he said in a low voice. "Will you come with me?"

"Um, yeah. Sure."

I stood and went to him, supporting him with my shoulder. His hand rubbed down my neck and rested between my shoulder blades.

"Thank you." His warm breath tickled my ear. I turned my face to him, but he was already staring straight ahead.

I swallowed and walked him to the door. Out we went into the hall with me staring down at our feet, being careful not to step on Aki, for his feet were bare and appeared as delicate as sand dollars.

"Where are you going?" A nurse asked us as she pushed an empty gurney.

"Restroom," I replied.

"Would you like a wheel chair?" She asked.

I started to speak, but Aki spoke first.

"No thank you."

I may have imagined it, but I think Aki tightened his hold onto me. Either way, I couldn't help but grin.

...

I washed my hands in the sink as I waited for Aki. I wasn't particularly dirty, but I needed to make some kind of noise so I would not have to hear Aki's inconsistent sharp intakes of breath as he struggled to urinate. I winced as Aki let out a small, accidental yelp.

I stared in the mirror, staring at Aki's stall behind me, feeling bad for him. I had had a urinary tract infection before, and they were not fun in the slightest.

Then the toilet flushed and the stall opened. I smacked off the water faucet and turned around.

Aki stumbled out, supporting himself on the dirty, metal frame of the stall, looking very much like a man hung-over.

"Sorry," he said shyly, knowing I had heard him.

"No, don't be," I said automatically. I rushed over and tried to help him, but he shook his head.

"I'm ok," he told me. He drug himself to the sink and methodically began filling his hands with soap.

I stepped back, feeling useless and in the way.

Aki stared down into the sink, watching the soap and water swirl down the drain as he slowly rubbed his hands together.

I scuffed my foot against the cold tile, then followed the tile to Aki's bare feet. Traveling upwards, I noticed his hospital gown was untied in the back, and it exposed his nakedness.

I moved forward, silently, swiftly, unconsciously holding my breath. I squatted down. My fingers reached and took hold of the two dangling strings that hung from his gown. Aki froze and became completely still as he felt me tugging on the strings.

"You're untied," I mumbled, tying a little bow. I straightened up.

As I stepped back, finished, he turned around. His eyes were dark and unreadable. I rubbed the back of my neck uncomfortably.

"Um... Are you hungry?" I asked, needing some kind of conversation. "I can go find the cafeteria..." I pointed my thumb towards the door of the restroom, but my motivation abruptly left and my hand dropped to my side. Aki's gaze was too intense for me to focus.

He walked up to me and instinctively I took a step back, but then he was right in front of me. Without warning, he threw his arms around my back and crushed himself against me, pressing his cheek into my chest. I felt tears warm the front of my shirt with their salty wetness.

For a moment, I believed I understood how Sono felt to have me as his lover, to be the dominant male, the elder and thus the respected one. I ran my fingers through Aki's hair, hugging him closer to me, and a smile crawled across my lips.

...

Visiting hours ended as the nurse said they would, so I left Aki's room obediently. But once the coast was clear, I went back inside.

Aki grinned at me as I hurried over, kicking off my shoes and wiggling out of my pants. He leaned forward and pulled my shirt over my head, then lifted up the covers so I could get in.

We snuggled together in the tiny, stiff, hospital bed. His body was warm and soft and melted into mine like softened butter. We faced each other in the dim light, our eyes sparkling. I tilted my head forward and kissed at his throat.

"Seiji," he whispered, and shuddered at my kiss. His hand seized onto my arm and he hugged it like a doll, curling up onto his side. He buried his nose into my chest, and his hot breath against my skin made me feel giddy.

I ran my fingers through his hair, wanting to pull his head back and kiss his mouth. But I could tell he was exhausted. He needed to rest. I let my arm fall over his back, drawing him close to me. Relaxing, I rested my cheek in the soft nest of his hair.

He sighed, a gentle, purring sound much like that of a cat.

I smiled to myself, my eyelids growing heavy despite the night being so young.

I wondered if Sono was worried about me, or if he even cared where I was or what I was doing. I recalled accidentally leaving my cell phone in Sono's car, and I was grateful for that. He could not pester me, now. I'll talk to him tomorrow, I thought reassuringly. He can wait until then.

I exhaled through my nose, then yawned and closed my eyes. Aki's knees drew up closer against my thighs, but then he was still. Soon my mind drifted off, and I slipped into a peaceful slumber.