ffucc

by victortor

This is an exercise in futility. Or, the AU where Noct lives a double life, one as himself and the other as Lady Lunafreya, Oracle of Tenebrae.

10. Twenty

So I found out you can't reply to anon comments and ? why?

xoxo- Thanks for commenting! It is trippy, isn't it? I honest can't deny that lmao. As for the rest, you'll find out real soon haha.

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When Luna is twenty years old, King Regis gifts Noct with the Engine Blade for his sixteenth birthday, and he hates it. Hates it so much, in fact, that he refuses to use it in his next training session with Gladio.

"What's wrong with you?" Gladio asks, but his tone is not unkind. "You got a better blade, so use it."

"It's not that simple," Noct grumbles, but he does admit that the line of reasoning is sound, and with great reluctance, he materializes it.

He's been learning how to use the crystal's magic, and Noct's ability to perform point warps is abysmal. His father tells him that he's actually not doing that badly, but it doesn't feel like it. He's getting better at fighting, too, but it's slow going.

Gladio is an absolute terror in training, and he never goes easy on Noct, but he's a surprisingly good companion outside the training room. He's a strange mix of confidence and passion and warmth, and when he laughs Noct can't help but laugh as well, even though more often than not it's at his expense.

They go lots of places, and he's the one that takes Noct to the banks of the river that flows through the city, and teaches him how to fish, and amidst Noct's protests ("Are you serious, Gladio?! Right here, in the middle of the city? Are you sure this isn't against the law?") he actually enjoys it, and finds out that he has a knack for it.

Next time they go to the lake at the edge of the Insomnia though, because as it turns out, it actually is illegal to fish in the river.

School is now an infinitely better experience with the company of Prompto. It turns out they have similar interests — video games and animals. It's with Prompto that he goes to the arcade after school, and they stop at the mall to look at all the newest games, and Noct accompanies Prompto around the city so he can take pictures.

The first time they do that, Noct notices the camera Prompto's holding — it's the one Luna gave him as a thank you all those years ago, and Prompto notices him looking at it, and laughs. "It was a gift from someone," He says, looking at it fondly. "It — well, it means a lot to me."

That doesn't make any sense, because Prompto hasn't even met Luna, so how could it mean a lot, and there are a lot of things about Prompto that Noct doesn't understand, but Prompto is always cheerful and kind, and Noct couldn't ask for a better friend.

There's a day when they're in the mall, and Noct says, "Hold on a sec," to Prompto and walks into a store.

"Noct?" Prompto asks, and follows him in.

Noct walks to the small rack of nail polish, and he's choosing between colors and tells Prompto, "There's a sale going on, so I might as well buy some." Luna can't get a hold of this stuff quite as easily as Noct can, and she definitely doesn't have as many color options.

"Oh… ok," Prompto says, obviously surprised, but he easily accepts Noct's words as the truth.

And the old lady working at the cashier looks at him suspiciously, and asks him who he's buying it for, and honestly, he understands that as royalty he's required to keep a respectable image, but Noct's kind of done with people like her and even Luna's feeling rather bold today, so he tells her the plain truth and answers, "Myself."

The lady's face is priceless, and Prompto looks rather gobsmacked himself, and Noct grabs his purchase and calmly walks out of the shop.

"Oh. My. God," Prompto breathes once they've left. "Did you see her face? She looked like you mauled her or something!"

Noct snorts, and allows a smile to flicker through. It was kinda funny. "Yeah." He agrees easily.

There's a small lull in conversation, and then —

"Hey, Noct," Prompto says, looking completely serious. "You know I won't judge you about this kind of stuff, right? It's perfectly fine if you wanna paint your nails, or put on makeup, or anything else; I won't care."

Noct's smile widens. "Yeah," He repeats. "Yeah, I know. Thanks, Prompto."

"You're welcome." Prompto winks at him. "Oh hey look! That sunset's really pretty. Lemme go take a picture of it."

So yes, there are many things about Prompto that just don't make sense, but Noct's fine with that.

And then there is Ignis — Ignis, who has been with Noct since he was a toddler, and has always helped him and has always been there for him.

And it's not good.

"Highness, consider adding more vegetables to your diet. Highness, have you read the newest reports? Highness, please, study more for your next exam, your scores were suboptimal at best."

It's all things Noct knows he should do, and he's trying, but it's still hard (Except for the vegetables, that's just him being picky). Ignis is a genius, always has been, and Noct isn't. It's a bit easier since Luna's learned everything before, but still, she's long forgotten, so Noct finds academics difficult. Luna's job is politics though, so she keeps an eye on Lucian affairs, but she doesn't know everything, and sometimes Noct is too tired to go over Ignis' reports.

The fact of the matter is, the things Ignis expects of him is hard enough for an ordinary person, and Noct has to deal with managing two lives, and he's actually trying now, and it's just difficult.

(And of course, there's always the one real reason beneath all the excuses that Noct doesn't like to think about.)

And it's ridiculous, because Ignis is only looking out for Noct, like he always has, and Luna appreciates it with a sort of resigned manner that she will never quite live up to expectations. Yet the same emotion expresses itself as anger in Noct, and he's angry, pissed that Ignis tries to force him to do things he doesn't want to do, and that he can't understand what Noct is going through.

Well, it's obvious he doesn't know, that he can't understand, Luna thinks. Because I haven't told him anything, and I can't tell him.

And it's stupid for me to be angry, Noct thinks. Because he's only looking out for me. So he swallows his anger, and continues on. It's not the best solution in the world, and Noct knows that Ignis can tell he's upset, but he doesn't want to be mad at him, so this is the only thing he can do.

Then one day Noct comes after dinnertime and Ignis is there, waiting for him.

"You're late," He says, tone disapproving. "Exams ended in the afternoon."

"Yeah, well," Noct says back, forcing himself to not retaliate. "I was out with Prompto at the arcade."

Ignis' brow furrows. "Perhaps you should consider spending less time with him," He says very carefully. "This… Prompto seems to have a corrupting influence on you."

"What?" Noct exclaims. "You're kidding, right? Prompto hasn't done anything to me."

"Your Highness," Ignis says, the very picture of calm and cool. "Ever since you've started high school, your study habits have deteriorated. You stay out later than you should. Your focus right now should be on your academics and learning your duties as king. The day you ascend if closer than you think. I'm not saying that you can't have classmates as friends, but this Prompto—"

"Look, Ignis," Noctis interrupts him. "You've never even met Prompto. Don't involve him in this—"

"Your Highness," Ignis says, and he looks genuinely concerned for Noct, but Noct's really starting to not care about what Ignis thinks, because if he's going to insult Prompto— "Your Highness, listen to me. You need to—"

"Why should I care about what I need?!" Noct snaps. "Who are you to tell me what to do?"

"I—"

But the words are pouring out, and neither he nor she can stop them. "I can't do this ok? I can't keep going on like this, with you telling me that I need to this and I need to that," Noct cries. "I just can't do it!"

"But you have to," Ignis tries to say. "You have to, Highness, because you have a duty to —"

"To the people, I know!" Noct shouts, rapidly losing his cool. "And to my father, I know! I know, I know, I know! You think I don't know, Ignis! You think I don't know?! Of course I know! It's been drilled into my brain the moment I was born!"

And how true that is, the way Luna grew up knowing she was going to be Oracle, the way Noct was born knowing he was to be king — they've known, but knowing and doing, as they have also long understood, are two very different things.

"You need to stop," Noct snarls, and he doesn't even know what's coming out of his mouth anymore, because this is nothing Luna would ever say, and he doesn't even know why he's saying it, and — "I can't do this, Ignis, so just fucking stop."

There's a tense, unfriendly silence between them, with Noct taking deep, angry, breaths and Ignis watching him, obviously shaken by this outburst. Noct has never been the screaming sort.

"It seems," Ignis manages to get out. "That no matter what I say, reason won't reach you now. I'll take my leave. Your dinner is on the table."

"Fuck," Noct mutters under his breath, and since he has a shred of decency beneath his facade of anger, he says louder, his voice still shaking. "Sorry. I'm really sorry, Ignis. I didn't mean what I said, and I'm really upset right now, but I'm so sorry."

Ignis is collecting his things, and he pauses when Noct says that, but doesn't say anything. Noct hears his footsteps as he walks to the exit, the click of the front door when it closes behind him.

"Fuck," Noct repeats, then sinks down into his couch and mushes his face into the pillows. He didn't mean that. He really, really, didn't mean that.

He should go out there, run after Ignis, apologize properly, but he can't right now. And he doesn't know what to do, so with shaking hands he fishes his phone out of his pocket and calls Gladio.

Gladio picks up almost immediately, his voice deep and calm. "Noct? What is it?"

"Gladio," Noct mutters, and he's not even ashamed that his voice cracks a little. "Can you get over here?"

"Woah," Gladio's voice is somehow incredibly soothing, and Noct's already relaxing a little. "What's wrong, princess?"

"Got into a fight with Ignis," Noct admits. "I… don't really know what I'm doing. Can you just come over for a bit?"

"Yeah, sure," Gladio responds easily. "I'll be there in a sec."

When he gets there, Noct's still lying on the couch, and he looks up blearily when he hears Gladio's heavy footsteps.

"Hey," Gladio greets. "You look like you've had a night."

"Tell me about it," Noct groans, and he adjusts himself into an upright position so Gladio can sit as well. Only he doesn't, he's walked over to the table where the food Ignis prepared for him is sitting.

"Naw, this ain't gonna work," Gladio mutters as he looks at the meal, and turns to Noct. "We need to some comfort food."

Noct tries to gets up to help Gladio, but he pushes Noct back onto the couch. "You stay right there, Prince Charmless." Gladio says, and rolls his shoulders, like he's preparing himself for something.

"Umm," Is Noct's graceful answer, because he has no idea what Gladio's trying to pull.

So he sits on the couch in bemusement as Gladio bustles around in the kitchen, looking completely out of his element, yet at the same time he seems to know exactly what he's doing. He grabs two mugs, takes the milk out of the fridge and pours both cups up to the brim, then proceeds to microwave them.

While the microwave hums, Gladio rummages around the cabinets in consternation. "I could've sworn there was some…" He grumbles, and then he grins. "Aha!" And pulls out some hot chocolate mix. He waggles his eyebrows at Noct and shakes the container enticingly.

Noct unwittingly laughs. "What the heck," He says. "Gladio, what the hell are you even doing?"

"Just wait for it," Gladio responds, just as the microwave dings. He proceeds to pour a generous amount of powder into each cup, and he mixes it in with a spoon.

Gladio hands one of the cups to Noct, which he takes gratefully, but not without some suspicion. "What are you up to?" Noct asks him. "I have no idea what's going on anymore, but I am very suspicious. Is there poison in this or something?"

Gladio laughs, deep and rich. "Relax, Noct," And he winks at him. "If I wanted to kill you, it wouldn't be through hot chocolate. I'm not wasting any of this stuff for assassination."

He walks into Noct's bedroom, and when he comes out he's armed with a mound of blankets, which he proceeds to throw onto Noct, who sputters and barely manages to keep the swathe of blankets from falling into his cup.

And then Gladio pulls out a tub of strawberry ice cream from the freezer, grabs the scoop, and sits down next to Noct, a cup in one hand and the tub in the other.

"Gladio, what the hell," Noct says flatly. "Did you just come over here to eat my food?"

"Hey, if you eat something hot, you gotta eat something cold too," Gladio says, setting the ice cream between them and taking a sip from his cup. "It's called a balanced diet."

"You can't be serious," Noct says in despair. "You actually did. You came here to eat my food."

Gladio laughs and swings an arm around Noct. "Don't you worry your pretty little ass, princess."

Noct sighs and leans on Gladio's shoulder. Gladio is tall, taller than Noct, and way bigger than Luna ever was when she was nineteen. "I can't believe you," He mutters. "Gladiolus Amicitia, the King's Shield, hot chocolate thief."

He takes a sip of from his mug. It's good.

They sit underneath the pile of blankets for a bit in companionable silence, until Gladio speaks up. "You know, me and Iris used to do this all the time," He says. "Whenever she would start crying, I'd just bury her under a bunch of blankets and we'd just eat ice cream until we both felt ok again."

Noct sneaks a look at Gladio. He's looking at Noct, his eyes warm. "Are you saying I'm an eleven year old?" Noct grumbles, and takes another sip.

"Well, you sure act like one," Gladio retorts, but in a kind manner. "And you're feeling a lot better, right?"

With a start, Noct realizes that he hasn't thought about Ignis at all since Gladio's gotten here. "... Yeah," He admits. "You're right. Thanks, Gladio."

"You're welcome," Gladio responds, draining the last of his hot chocolate, and he proceeds to set the empty mug on the floor. "Now, tell me what happened with Specs."

"I got mad at him," Noct says. "And I said a lot things I didn't mean to say."

"Things have been tense between you two for a while," Gladio notes, and takes off the cap of the ice cream tub, and proceeds to eat straight from the tub. "Want some?"

"You're such a pig," Noct complains, but he takes the proffered spoon and scoops up some ice cream for himself.

There's another lull in conversation while they eat, and then Noct says, "I feel really bad that I yelled at him. Ignis didn't do anything wrong, I just couldn't control my temper."

Gladio is silent for a bit, and then he says, "You know, Iggy's been over at my place more than once, fretting over you."

"Really?"

"Yeah," He closes his eyes. "He's worried that you don't understand the position in you're in."

"But I do," Noct bursts out. "And he doesn't get that."

"Yeah, that's what I told him." Gladio replies, and the arm around Noct reaches to ruffle his hair. "You're a bit smarter than that, at least. But that doesn't sound like he 'didn't do anything wrong' to me."

"That's not what I mean," Noct says. "Ignis is just trying to help me. I shouldn't have yelled. I really should apologize."

"You shouldn't have," Gladio agrees. "But at least you acknowledge that you did, and that it was wrong. Just talk to him, Noct. Ignis will listen to you, you know."

"... Yeah." Noct agrees, and then he remembers something else. "Oh, and he called Prompto a 'bad influence.'"

"Prompto? That kid you know from school?" Gladio asks, and then guffaws. "I've never met him, but from what you've told me, he sounds like an absolute sweetheart."

"Basically," Noct hums and inches closer to Gladio. "I guess… I better tell that to Ignis myself."

"You got it," Gladio agrees, and then, "Man, what did you even need me for? You already had all that figured out."

Noct thinks about it, and he realizes that yes, he already knew what he needed to do. But he felt horrible, and there was a churning feeling and an acrid taste in his mouth from what he said. Since Gladio's come, though, it's dissipated. So he shrugs and says, "So you could make me hot chocolate, I guess."

"You're so spoiled," Gladio retorts good-naturedly, and then pushes Noct's head off his shoulder. "Alright, I need to head out soon, otherwise Iris is gonna start wondering whether I've been kidnapped."

"Who would want to kidnap you?" Noct teases. "I'm the obvious, better looking target."

"Shut up."

And so Gladio leaves, but he leaves the feeling of warmth and love draped over Noct.

So the next day, Noct's looked over the reports he's been given and is in the process of studying when Ignis bursts in, breathing hard like he's been running, his glasses askew.

"Woah, Iggy?" Noct looks up in alarm. "Are you ok?"

"Your Highness," Ignis gasps. "I…" It's the most harried Noct has ever seen him, and then to his horror, Ignis looks like he's about to cry.

Noct rushes to his side, and sits Ignis down at the nearest chair. "What happened?" Noct asks. "Are you going to be ok?"

Ignis shakes his head, and Noct's not sure whether it's supposed to be a 'no I am not going to be fine' or 'no I am not fine but i will be later' because really, you'd expect it to be the first but sometimes people are odd and it's the latter—

"Your father," Ignis says haltingly, cutting off Noct's unnecessary inner ramblings, "Felt the need to inform me about some confidential information regarding… the nature of the Lucian kings."

And there's really only one thing that could be, so Noct says just to confirm, "So he told you about the whole two bodies thing."

"... Yes."

"That doesn't really explain why you look like you're about to break down," Noct points out.

"Your Highness," And Ignis looks up at him with eyes that are just a bit too suspiciously bright. "Please accept my most sincere apologies."

"What? Ignis, you're making way less sense than you usually do. I was going to apologize to you."

He shakes his head once again, and his voice is quiet. "No. I'm sorry, Highness. You were right, I was pushing you too hard."

"No, you weren't!" Noct protests and he grabs Ignis' hands and holds them, because he needs him to understand what Noct is trying to say. "I told you, didn't I? I know that I'm going to have to do all the stuff you tell me to do, and just because I didn't try hard enough—"

"That you weren't trying hard enough?" Ignis repeats, and Noct doesn't know what to do, he's never seen and he never will see Ignis this emotional again. "Who in Eos told you that, Your Highness? That you don't try hard enough?"

Noct gapes like a fish, and then opens his mouth to speak. Ignis gives him a look, so he closes it.

"I don't think anyone's acknowledged it. I don't think you've acknowledged it either. But if you look hard enough, Your Highness, anyone can see how hard you try." Ignis says. "These past few years have been hard on you."

"Ignis, maybe you haven't noticed, but I'm barely scraping by in all my classes," Noct interjects. "Gladio hasn't been complaining, but I know my training is going at a snail's pace. And you said it yourself; I've been slacking off since I entered high school—"

"Oh, toss what I said!" Ignis interrupts, and adds, "And I apologize for trying to blame your friend Prompto. You just might be a worse influence on him than he is on you."

"Apology accepted," Noct says automatically, and then, "But Ignis, I need to be better. I can't just be bad at everything forever—"

"And rest assured, we will work something out. But what we're doing now isn't going to work."

"There's nothing stopping me but myself," Noct echoes Gladio's words from all those years ago. "So it's fine, Ignis, just keep doing your job."

"My job is to advise you," Ignis says, "But it's more than that. I want you to be a proper king, Your Highness, but I also want you to be happy. Both are important."

"I've known you for a long time," He continues. "And I know you're always sleeping, always tired. I never questioned it. But I didn't understand, you're tired because of who you are; you live two lives when you should just be living one, and it's draining.

"For the longest time I've tried to make you better by pushing you harder, and for that I'm ashamed." Ignis finishes. "I've known you weren't happy. Didn't last night prove it? You're trying your best, Noct, but I haven't been the best advisor."

"Ignis, you're such an idiot," Noctis says. "I couldn't ask for anyone better, ok? Don't put yourself down like this."

"Then don't put yourself down, either. I'm here to help you." Ignis answers. "I couldn't have known about your predicament, but now I do, and I want to do better. You most likely remember little about this, but after your accident eight years ago, everyone in the Citadel was terribly worried about you."

"I remember that," Noct says, affronted. "How could I forget?"

"You became such a quiet child after that — you rarely laughed, always slept, and it had everyone concerned," Ignis admits. "I learned to bake because of it, because I knew you enjoyed eating sweets and I didn't how else to help you."

Noct never knew that, that Ignis picked up his skill of cooking for him.

"It was terrible, back then — I didn't know what you needed, and I didn't know how to make you happy," He continues. "Your Highness, I never want to feel like that again, and more importantly, I don't want you to feel like that again. I didn't have the full picture before, but now I do. So please, Highness, help me do my job and tell me when something is too much."

And they're still holding hands, Ignis sitting on a chair and Noct kneeling on the ground, and they look at each other in silence until Noct laughs a bit shakily, and gets out, "... Yeah. Yeah, of course, Iggy."

For a while they just stay like that, and the ambient light grows dim, and then Noct says, out of the blue, "Ignis, I'm scared about my dad."

"The king?"

"Yeah." In the fading light it's hard to see Ignis' face, but Noct looks up anyway, his voice thick. "You know he gave me the Engine Blade for my birthday, right?"

"Certainly. Gladio also told me that you hate using it."

"It's nice and all, but it reminds me of things I don't want to think about," Noct says, and finally gets up from the ground because his legs are starting to fall asleep. He grabs a chair and puts it next to Ignis. "Ignis, I don't ever want to use it."

"Why not?"

"Because my dad gave it to me to defend myself, defend this country, and do my duty." Noct says. "He gave it to me so I could use it as king, and if I'm king then that means he's dead.

"You know, I saw him on TV the other day. I hadn't even realized that he started using a cane," Noct laughs bitterly, and then, "I don't want my dad to die, Ignis. And it's stupid, because not looking at your reports and not using the blade he gave me won't make him live any longer, or make him healthier. I just don't want to think about it."

There are some days where Luna will belatedly realize all over again that she's Oracle because her mother is dead, and she will be King of Lucis once her father is dead too, and Noct can't let that happen, won't let that happen.

"It's stupid, but it's understandable," Ignis says to him. "Thank you for telling me this, Your Highness."

"Call me Noct," Is what Noct says in return, and every time he says it Ignis will always ignore him, but maybe this time— and he adds, "C'mon, Ignis. It'd make me feel a lot better. And we're friends, aren't we?"

Ignis snorts. "Don't use my words against me," He tells Noct. "But alright… Noct."

Then it's just them, sitting in the dark.

(Afterwards, they eat Cup Noodle together. It's a nice time, and Ignis asks, "Permission to inform Gladio about this?" and Noct doesn't even hesitate to say yes. It's a bit like, well, like a weight has been lifted off his chest and there's one less thing he needs to hide.)

It's a few days later when he's hanging out at the arcade with Prompto and a voice behind them roars, "What are you doing outside of school?" And Prompto yelps and stammers out some excuse, but when Noct turns around it's just Gladio, dressed in sweats and a cap.

"School ends early during exams, Gladio," Noct says dryly, and Prompto looks at him in surprise. "But you already knew that, didn't you?"

Gladio grins, and it's all teeth. "Caught me there," He admits, and turns toward Prompto. His stance is still hostile. "So you're the kid the prince has been talking about."

"Umm," Prompto squeaks in response. "Eep."

Gladio laughs, and the tension disappears from his body. "Relax. Prompto, right? You seem like a cool guy."

Noct rolls his eyes. "Quit messing with him, Gladio. What're you here for?"

"Well, Ignis came over and told me some pretty interesting stuff earlier today," Gladio says casually. "Said that I oughtta talk to you."

"I mean, sure," Noct says, and he picks up his schoolbag from the floor. "Sorry, Prompto. Looks like we're gonna have to cut this short."

"Eh, don't worry about it," The blond responds easily. "See ya tomorrow."

So Prompto leaves and Noct follows Gladio out of the arcade, toward the Amicitia residence.

"So, why wasn't I informed about the whole two body thing?" Gladio asks him, and Noct can only shrug.

"Well, I wasn't supposed to tell anyone," Noct tells him. "It was Dad who told Ignis. Also, I can't believe you're calling it the whole two body thing. That sounds so weird."

"Got a better name?" Gladio counters. "And the king told Ignis, huh."

They cross the street. Honestly, Noct can't believe both Ignis and Gladio are taking it in so calmly. Then again, maybe it isn't as unbelievable as it seems. He's always been a bit uncoordinated, and he spaces out or goes to sleep more than he should.

Gladio doesn't ask Noct who his other body is. They both know that Noct won't be able to say.

"Ignis told me that I shouldn't be pushing you," Gladio speaks up, looking straight ahead. "And I get what he means. I don't know what it's like to be you, and I don't think I want to know. The pressure you're under must be incredible."

They round another street corner, and Noct watches Gladio intently. He's not done yet.

"But, you know what? I don't think I'm gonna listen to him," He says, and turns to look at Noct. The sky is orange, and Gladio's face is bathed in rosy light. "I know you, Noct. You're a lazy piece of shit."

"Hey," Noct protests, but the comment isn't meant to insult.

"Everyone's a lazy piece of shit," Gladio clarifies. "We all need something to push us, otherwise we're not going to do anything. And I want you to do something with your life, Noct. It's not like I need you to be the best swordsman around, or be the smartest, or go down as the best ruler in history, but I need you to be a good person and try and do, so I can be proud of the man I've set my life down for."

And that's when it really hits him, because Noct's never really understood why Gladio opened up to him. He's always assumed it was because he helped out Iris, and of course that's true, but it's because Gladio is a prideful creature. He's ever so conscious of his role as Shield, and he's ever so aware that he's going to die serving a king. And he's proud of that fact, and by extension he's also proud of Noct, of the king, who he can't accept as anyone but someone good, someone who's worth it.

(And it's somehow different from Ignis, who is also deeply devoted to his job. He cares for Noct as best he can, and so does Gladio, but it's just different. Maybe it can just characterized by what they say, where Ignis says Let me help you with your burdens, you're not alone in this and Gladio says In spite of everything you face, I won't let you slack off.

In the end, though, they both boil down to I will help you and Noct has never felt so aware of them and how much they do for him.)

Noct studies Gladio's face. He's been experimenting with facial hair for a while now. His eyes are just as fierce as they've always been. He's definitely handsome in a rugged, masculine sense. But he looks the same as he always has, in the ways that matter to Noct, strong and dependable and prideful and warm.

He looks the same, he is the same, so it comes out of nowhere, bubbling out of him, and Noct's surprised even himself, but his brain tells him, you're in love.

Because he really thinks he might be, and he's never thought about it before, because it's nothing like that servant in Tenebrae, he never even knew her, but it's Gladio and he's always been there for Noct and he's funny and he's kind of jerk sometimes, but Noct likes to be around him, wants to be around him.

Noct likes him.

Oh.

So Noct takes a deep breath, smiles and snarks, "Like I expected anything else," but his heart his is pounding out of his chest, his palms are suddenly clammy, and his fingers curl into a loose fist.

Gladio doesn't seem to notice anything, though, and they walk to his house. That night, Noct has dinner with the Amicitias and their butler Jared, and he can't take his eyes off his food, for fear he'll stare at Gladio for too long.

Then pretty soon it's getting late, so he's saying goodbye to Clarus and Gladio and Iris and he's walking back to his flat. He stops under one of the flickering streetlights to tie his shoelace.

Noct is in big trouble.

And the same time an ocean away, Luna is with Gentiana and her mouth hangs open agape, before she quickly recovers.

Gentiana says, "The ascension of the Chosen King will be preceded by a covenant of the gods."

So Luna thinks absently, Oh boy, and brushes the hair out of her face. She cut her hair a few years back, but now she's letting it grow out. Every time she lets it down, strands slip out from behind her ear.

Luna takes a deep breath and stands up. She calls, "Gentiana."

"Oracle," Gentiana's voice greets her, and the Messenger looks as serene as ever.

Luna is not serene right now. Her heart is shaking, her hands are fists. She is in turmoil and in a frenzy; unhappiness lines her brow and stress tugs at her dress. "Why?" She asks. "Gentiana, why did the Six make it so?"

Gentiana opens her eyes, and her face seems to sadden, and she looks at Luna with something akin to pity, and Luna has never hated her more. "It was not the will of the gods that it happened, merely the necessity of erasing the Accursed." She says, and she may look sad, but her tone is just as mysterious as ever.

The Accursed. Luna has never heard of the Accursed. Why doesn't she know about the Accursed? As Oracle, the Messenger has to tell her the will of the gods, and all that is ordained — she needs to know in order to do her duty.

"There are things you're deliberately withholding from me," Luna states. "Gentiana, why?"

Gentiana purses her lips. "It is the will of the king," She answers. "And the gods chose to fulfill his request."

"King Regis." Luna says flatly, and it doesn't make any sense at all. Why would he wish for Luna to not know?

"Yes."

"'In order for the King of Kings to ascend, he must enter a covenant with the gods,'" repeats Luna. "Why did you tell me this, then?"

"Because you must know your duty," She responds. "Creating the pact will be your responsibility."

A covenant, Luna thinks blankly. Slowly, she sits back down onto her sofa.

"And if… I refuse?" She can hear her own voice say.

"Then the world will fall into darkness forevermore." Gentiana answers calmly, as if they aren't talking about the end of the world.

Oh, Noct thinks, lying on his bed. And he slowly puts both arms over her face.

I'm in love, Luna thinks out of the blue, and she can't believe this is happening. I'm going to enter a covenant with the gods. She lets out a disbelieving laugh.

Don't think about it.

Don't think about it.

For now, just don't think about anything, and rest.

When Luna wakes up the next morning, it's almost as if the day before was a dream, and yet it was the most exciting day she's had in years.

The fact of the matter is, for all that Luna is the Oracle and well respected around Eos, she's merely a political prisoner of the empire — a bargaining chip, a figurehead really, for the emperor in Tenebrae. She can't even leave the manor without her brother's direct permission, and she's never set foot outside the province. (Well, the last bit's technically a lie — she lives in Lucis, after all.)

There is no one here who is truly her friend. The retainers have always been kind to her, and Luna tries to be courteous back, and she may love her brother but she stopped liking him a long time ago. Due to her position, she's isolated herself socially from the rest of the village. Despite all the differences in their lives, Luna and Noct have one thing in common: loneliness.

But Noct has it better now, he has it good. He has Prompto and Ignis and Gladio and they're going to be there for him, they're going to support him and love him.

Sometimes Luna doesn't want to be Luna. She'd much rather be Noct all the time, because Noct has struggles and worries and it's scary being Noct, but Noct has family. Luna feels alone, and she's stuck doing the same thing everyday, chained to her role. Each year the chains get a bit heavier, and squeeze her a little more, and Luna knows that one day they'll—

Don't think about it right now.

Luna's spent all her hours trying to be Noct instead of Luna, because she wants to go to high school, she wants to go to the arcade with Prompto, she wants to eat Ignis' cooking, she wants to train with Gladio, she wants to see her father again. Luna works, but she puts on the mask of the Oracle with a gentle smile and she spirits away to Insomnia where she can laugh and joke and cry with her friends.

Her friends— Gladio. Gladio.

There's nothing special about Gladio. Well, it's more like there's nothing that sets him apart from Ignis and Prompto. They all care about Noct, and it's not as if Gladio cares more or spends more time with him. She loves all of them, and she doesn't think she loves him any more than she does her father, or anyone else. He's just… Gladio, a guy with a rough personality, broad shoulders, he's just big everywhere, actually, if she really thinks about it, muscled arms— wait, it might also be muscled everything, he works out a lot.

Suddenly realizing that she's thinking about his body, she blinks rapidly a few times and forces herself not to turn red. This is ridiculous, frankly.

But the point is, the only thing she can really say is that she likes him, and he's attractive.

(Luna's mental acknowledgement makes her blush, and she's actually kind of upset. She's trying to be reasonable and work out her feelings like anyone with sense would, and it's rather annoying to get embarrassed.)

"I'm in love with a man that I've never met in my life." Luna says aloud. "Oddly enough, that seems rather possible." She laughs and flops on her bed. Honestly, the whole situation is rather funny.

But it's sad if she thinks too hard. She's in love with someone who she's never met, and probably never will, because she's—

Don't think about it.

That day Noct wakes up at noon, curled up in his bed. Ever so slowly, he rolls to the edge, gingerly places his feet on the ground, gets off the bed, and belatedly realizes that he has school today.

"Fuck it," He says aloud, and staggers over to the living room, where he proceeds to turn on the television and switch the channel to the one that always plays those terrible fantasy dramas.

When Prompto comes over after school to see if he's ok, is he sick, he finds Noct sitting on the couch in his pajamas, blankly staring at the screen as the scantily clad heroine is a sobbing mess on the ground of a stone dungeon, only just realizing that the villain was her lover all along.

"Man, this stuff is trash," Prompto comments, and turns to look at Noct. "Have you been watching this all day?"

"Pretty much," Noct says dryly. "Honestly, it's so terrible I can't look away."

"Have you even eaten lunch?" Prompto asks, glancing at his pajamas.

"Haven't even eaten breakfast," Noct admits. "I'm actually kinda hungry."

So he eats an afternoon snack with Prompto, which is just a bag of popcorn the two share. Prompto fills him in on what he missed at school, and gives him today's notes.

"Why'd you skip anyway?" Prompto mumbles while he munches on some kernels.

Noct hums noncommittally. "Overslept, and then just didn't feel like going, I guess."

But Prompto is perceptive, and he says to Noct, "Is this related to Mr. Buff Dude needing to talk yesterday?"

"What?" It takes a second for Noct to realize that he's talking about Gladio, and he laughs a little and responds, "Oh my god, Prompto, watch me call him that next time."

"Don't change the subject, man," Prompto whines. "And I mean, go for it I guess. Just don't tell him the name came from me. I don't want to get beat up."

Noct snorts. "Yeah, yeah."

The conversation lulls for a bit, and Noct listens to the sound of Prompto munching and the sobbing of the heroine. He doesn't really want to answer the question.

"Look," Prompto pauses in his chewing, and says quietly, "If you don't want to tell me, it's fine to just say so. I'm sure there's tons of stuff that you don't tell me anyways."

"Prompto, I—" Noct cuts off, and shakes his head. "It's not that I don't trust you or something, I—"

"No, I get it." Prompto interrupts. "I'm not exactly sure what's going on, but I know that you're royalty and all. I'm sure there's just a lot of confidential stuff you're not allowed to tell civilians like me."

Noct frowns. It's partly true, he supposes. Prompto doesn't know about anything about Luna, the way Gladio and Ignis and his dad do, and even they don't know everything. But there's a lot of things that he doesn't tell Prompto, or anyone really, and it's not because of confidentiality. He's not ready to say "I think I like Gladio" to anyone yet.

(Even more than that, he's not ready to talk about the covenant.)

"Sorry," is what he says instead, and focuses on the ground. "I don't want you to think I'm lying to you. You're my friend. I trust you."

Prompto understands his shifty-eyed looks, and he's awfully perceptive for someone so ditzy. "So you're saying it's not something about classified information," He comments, and smiles at Noct. "That's ok too, you know. You're allowed to have secrets."

Noct looks at him in surprise, and Prompto laughs and teases him, "Ignis and Gladio would never say that to you, huh? I bet they'd be like," And he makes his voice go into a falsetto, and it doesn't sound much like Ignis or Gladio. "'Oh Your Highness, you have to tell us what's bothering you. You have to trust us to help you.'"

Then Prompto stops, and says in his normal voice, "Actually, that sounded like I was making fun of them. I didn't mean it like that. It's just… you tell me a lot about both of them, Noct. And honestly, they sound pretty great. They're always there for you, huh?"

"Yeah," Noct agrees, still not quite sure what Prompto's trying to say.

"Look Noct," Prompto says, and he looks awfully wise, "I'm not your royal advisor, and I'm not your Shield. My family hasn't been in service to you for generations. Sure, I'd like to think you trust me and of course you're my friend and I want you to tell me about what's wrong, but if you don't want to tell me, it's fine. It really, really is."

"I don't have a duty to care for you, or protect you. You're your own person, Noct, and if you don't want me to know something, I can respect that." He takes a breath, and says ever so carefully, "I… didn't exactly have the best childhood, you know."

"It wasn't terrible or anything," He tacks on hastily, when Noct opens his mouth in alarm. "My parents were just… always busy. They still are, really. I spent most of my time alone, and there were a lot of things I didn't tell anyone, and things I felt I couldn't tell anyone."

And really, both Noct and Luna can understand that, even though they've spent their whole lives surrounded by the masses— solitude is just something they've learned to live with. Secrets were inevitable.

"People say that bottling things up isn't healthy," Prompto says, snapping Noct out of his reverie. "And I mean, I guess it isn't. Sometimes it eats at you. Sometimes it feels terrible. But… I think sometimes, there are just some things you have to keep to yourself."

He sighs, shaking his head. "Honestly Noct, I don't even know what I'm telling you. I don't know whether I'm saying everything right or wrong. Just… I have a lot of secrets too. So it's ok if you don't want to tell me, and I hope it's ok if there're things I don't tell you."

Prompto is an odd one. He's lighthearted, makes jokes. It's hard to reconcile the teenager sitting next to him to the quiet, painfully shy bespectacled boy that was once in elementary school with him. But Noct thinks he sees the latter now, the way Prompto's lips are a tight line and he can't seem to look Noct in the eye.

Prompto is an odd one. Gladio and Ignis are there for him, will always be there for him, and their world seems to revolve around Noct — always him first, then themselves. Prompto is there for him, but he's also there for himself. He has his own insecurities, he has his own secrets. He doesn't need Noct, he realizes. Prompto has a life outside of him.

Prompto is an odd one. Too many things don't add up— why he avoided Noct for years then suddenly decided to be friends with him, why he still uses the camera Luna gave him, why he had a complete 180 in personality — and there are too many things Noct doesn't know. He's never known about Prompto's parents, and he suspects Prompto doesn't like to talk about them much.

Prompto is an odd one because he's different, but it's not bad that he's different. It's not really good either. It just is, and Noct can either take that fact and accept it, or deny it.

It's a paradox, really. Ignis and Gladio tell him they're never going to leave him by himself, and Prompto tells him he'll let Noct be alone if he wants to — a contradiction of truths, but really, practically everything in life is that way.

So he looks at Prompto tells him plainly, "I don't know what you're going through, Prompto, but as long as you tell me it's going to be fine, I won't ask."

His face shines and he says, "Yeah, Noct. I'm ok. I'm going to be fine. And, uh, sorry for getting so real all of sudden. I bet you just have a crush, huh?"

Noct actually turns red, and Prompto doubles over with laughter. "Oh my god, I was right? You gotta be kidding me! The prince of Lucis has a crush? Who is it? Umm, Alyssa? Nah, she doesn't seem like your type. Brett from the other class? Our homeroom teacher?"

"Shut. Up." Noct manages to get out. "And who the hell is Brett?"

"Ok, so he's out." Prompto says, and mimes crossing a name out on a list. "Who could it be, hmm…"

"I thought you weren't going to pry," Noct protests, and he's almost whining.

"Sorry, sorry," Prompto laughs, holding his arms up in surrender. "But you should totally see your face right now. This is like, the most flustered I've ever seen you."

"Prompto, kindly get out of my house."

Only he doesn't, and when Ignis comes over in the evening, Prompto is still chatting animatedly with Noct on the couch.

"So you're Ignis," Prompto says brightly, but there's an undercurrent of nervousness in his tone that Noct doubts anyone but him can detect. "It's nice to finally meet you. Noct always shares his food with me, and it's great!"

Ignis pushes up his glasses and Noct watches as he examines Prompto, noting all that he is, with his styled hair and messy school uniform and cheeky smile.

Then, without missing a beat, he says, "Of course. Prompto, is it? The prince speaks highly of you."

"Quit talking like I'm not here," says Noct, but without any real heat. "Can Prompto stay over for dinner?"

Prompto looks at him in surprise, but Ignis replies calmly, "I don't see why not."

"Can I really?" Prompto asks, uncharacteristically nervous. "I don't want to intrude or anything."

Noct clasp him on the back. "You aren't. Besides, don't you want some of Ignis' cooking?"

So Ignis cooks them steak and they all eat together. He and Prompto somehow manage to get along spectacularly, despite their differing personalities. It's a pleasant affair.

And the weeks drift past Noct, and his life once again slips into the mundane. This time, he's the one who's changed, who's stuck in a whirlwind of thoughts and he's not sure what to think.

As usual, Gladio invites him to go places regularly, and it's always something new: eating at the new restaurant that opened up, going to a festival, fishing (alright, maybe that one isn't new), movies, or just more training.

Noct can't stop noticing things, like how Gladio talks while chewing or how his biceps flex or the way he always seems to have his attention on Noct. Sometimes Noct will stop mid-sentence to just look at him.

"What?" Gladio will always ask after he stops.

"Sorry, it's nothing," Noct will always respond and shake his head.

And this goes on for weeks, until Noct works up the courage to ask him, "Why are you always looking at me?"

Gladio turns around, his eyebrows raised. "I hadn't realized you noticed," He replies. "I'm your Shield, remember? It's my job to look out for you. You never know when some asshole's about to come over and ruin shit up."

"Oh…" Noct can't help but feel disappointed, even though that's what makes sense.

"Alright," Gladio walks up to him. "You've been acting weird for a while. What's up?"

"Nothing," Noct says automatically.

"Oi, didn't you and Ignis just have a talk about communication?" Gladio asks him, exasperated. "Talk to me."

"It's nothing you need to worry about," Noct says. "I'm good. Really."

Gladio looks at him skeptically. It's clear he doesn't buy it.

"OhwaitlooksatthetimesorryIgottogoIgnisiswaitingformebyeseeyoulater," Noct says, turns tail and leaves.

"Iggy's in a council meeting!" He hears Gladio shout from behind. Without turning around, Noct flips him the bird.

He actually tries to avoid him for the next few days, not bothering to attend any of their sparring sessions, but one day when Noct comes home Gladio's sitting on his couch, reading a book.

"Hey," He greets without looking up. "Wanna tell me what's up?"

"Would you let me say no?" counters Noct, crossing his arms. He plops down on the sofa next to Gladio.

They sit there for a while, Noct staring blankly ahead of him and Gladio quietly flipping pages.

"I like you," Noct blurts out, and shifts anxiously on the couch. He refuses to take his eyes off Gladio though.

"Ok," Gladio says easily.

Noct gapes at him, and he smirks. "What, you think I didn't notice?"

"Wh-you—" Noct sputters, and the larger man laughs.

"Man, you're cute when you're flustered." He comments, and then suddenly grabs Noct in a headlock. "And you're way too nervous."

"Gladio, what the fuck?" Noct yelps, and vainly struggles to get out of Gladio's grip to no avail.

And then all of a sudden Gladio's fingers are all over him, and—

"O-Oh my god," Noct shrieks. "S-Stop! In the fucking name of the law!"

"Language, Noct," Gladio says, his amusement clear in his voice. "Stop wriggling."

"S-s-stop fucking t-t-tickling me you asshole," Noct gasps out between wild giggles that are bubbling out of him. "I'll f-f-fucking a-arrest you."

Gladio laughs, and it's not his usual laugh that he does when he finds something funny. It's faster, longer, and it also sounds really, really dumb.

When he finally lets go, Noct lies on the couch for a few moments, breathing hard. "Goddamn it, Gladio, you're fired," He complains. "Also, you have the ugliest laugh I've ever heard."

"But you still think I'm hot," Gladio counters, crossing his arms smugly.

"And you think I'm cute," Noct shoots back.

"I'm going to to readily agree with that."

"Umm," Noct stammers out. He's not used to being complimented because of his looks. "... Thanks?"

"Noct," Gladio says, and he's still smiling but his tone is serious. "When you say you like me, what do you mean?"

"What do you mean 'what do I mean?'" Noct asks, annoyed. "Doesn't it just mean I like you?"

"Do you want to have sex with me?" Gladio asks, and Noct turns red at that, and Gladio seems to only grow more amused. "Aww, are you embarrassed?"

Noct ignores his last comment, and tries to answer his question honestly. "I mean… yeah, I guess," He hedges uncomfortably. "But I mean, that's not really why I like you. I just like spending time with you. I like being with other people too, don't get me wrong, but it's just different."

He doesn't have the right words to explain it, and he doubts he ever will, but it's just a small feeling in his chest that always there, flickering ever so gently like a small flame. Whenever Gladio is around it spreads to his legs, his arms, his face. It's not really intense, and it's not hot like he expects it to be. The feeling is just there, and it makes his lips turn up and his eyes light with a brightness. It just is, and Noct isn't sure what exactly to say.

"And it's different because you love me." Gladio says, a question disguised as statement.

"I love a lot of people," Noct says. "But I'm in love with you."

Gladio stares at him intently, as if he's trying to sense any dishonesty in Noct's words. Then he lets out a sigh, closing his eyes.

"C'mere," He tells Noct, motioning him to come closer. Confused, Noct does so, and Gladio gently leads his face towards his by the chin.

The kiss is chaste, short and sweet, leaving Noct blinking in surprise. Gladio smirks.

"That's my answer," He tells him. "Also, I'm not gonna fuck the prince of Lucis while he's still underage."

Noct stares at Gladio incredulously. "I… I don't even. This was not how I was expecting this to go."

"What are you complaining about? You got the guy."

"You just kissed me."

"And you liked it."

"How are you taking this so calmly?" Noct asks, frustrated. "I mean it's great and all, but I feel kind of cheated. It took a lot of effort to confess, you know. Could you at least try to be surprised?"

"You're such a drama queen," Gladio laughs. "And how do you expect me to be surprised? We literally go on a date, like, every week. Didn't we go to the theater together last Saturday? And I take you fishing all the time."

"Those were dates?"

Gladio looks at him fondly and takes his hand. "For someone so smart, you're kinda dense." He comments. "Did you actually buy that bullshit about me always looking at you because it's my job? Don't think that I'm gonna take it easy on you during training, though."

And that's how Noct starts dating Gladio, through a short and impromptu tickle fight and kissing session. It's really weird, but Gladio is smiling and Noct is glad so he's really not going to complain.

(When he tells the others, falteringly, because he's not quite sure how to say "I have a boyfriend now," Prompto laughs and claps him on the back, congratulating him.

Ignis, however, only looks confused. "I was under the impression you were already romantically engaged with him." He says, his brow furrowing.

"Wait, what?"

"Well, he told me he was interested in you months ago, you appeared to like him back, and the two of you often go on dates. Frankly, all the facts pointed to the two of you in a relationship."

"And… you're ok with this?"

"At first, I had some concerns," He admits. "It's not exactly a professional relationship, per say. But I trust in Gladio to know what he's doing, and your happiness is always important, Noct."

Your happiness is always important, Noct.

Your happiness is always important, Noct, Luna chants in her head, and she slowly begins to plan and plan about her future and Noct and Gladio and everything inbetween.)

---

So I have a confession to make- I originally didn't realize that I hadn't tagged Noct/Gladio, and then when I realized I decided I wouldn't because I always hear these horror stories about this site where people get reviews like "this story was good before it was gay" and I really, really wanted one of those. :D The romance ain't the main focus of the story, like i've said before, so if you really hate it, it's probably time to stop reading this dumbass AU, but if you don't everything will be fine.