Author's note- By the end of this chapter; you will all with think I'm pretty damn good…or I'm a huge bitch. Unless you're my friend…then you'll think I totally reused this scene from either Cure or Pyramid. Well I didn't; I checked all the parts. Any who; I hope you enjoy at least half of this chapter. I reuploaded this to warn you about the contents of this chapter. Please forgive me if you were offended.
Disclaimer- If this game belonged to me...it would have ended up like Thrill Kill; never making it to a video game store near you…
Warning- Ok…You know I warned you all that this story may not be appropriate for some viewers right? Right? I did warn you…right?
Ok; this chapter contains serious content that a lot of you may find disturbing. I'm warning you because I do not want you to be overly upset when this is over. I really feel bad about this too, this was a hard thing for me to type out. But once Saix enters Xemnas' room, the story will become much darker.
I read this, and I thought if I removed a few things; it would be ok. But...it isn't ok. I didn't warn you all. That's not cool. So That's why I had this chapter temporarily removed; to do the right thing and inform my fans that this chapter, technically; does fit into the horror genre. If you feel the need; I will rewrite a much more softer version; I understand some of you may not want to read this.
Third Trimester-Heart and Horror
Winter in the World That Never was….a harsh reality of cold days and even colder nights. The temperature would drop well below zero (Fahrenheit) at some times, and it would never stop raining. It would rain for days, weeks, sometimes till winter ended, and these raindrops would feel like icy bullets when they hit one. There was no snow, there never was, not even when it was cold enough to snow. White would not exist in a world of black; snow was no exception to this rule.
Nobodies, as ridiculous as it may seem; were perceptible to the flu. We will leave it at that.
The World that Never Was….it was not a silent world during this time of the year. Although Xemnas was not one for religion, or the other senior members, it was practiced amongst the few nobodies that had a religion, as odd and out of place as it may be, to celebrate a certain holiday. The seniors didn't understand it at all; why celebrate a pagan holiday that was supposed to center around some man who was not even born in the month of December? It made no sense to them at all. But every year it happened…and it meant that Xemnas would have to hold another meeting about what the nobodies could or could not do during this time of the month.
Sure; he would talk and they would pretend to listen, and on December the twenty fourth, he and the other seniors could expect a long night of loud noise and swear and could expect waking up to even more loud noises and…giggles. Xemnas would also have to deal with the mess that was left behind…
But this year was different. Perhaps it was because there was a long list telling the other members that they had no real freedom, perhaps it was because Xemnas was becoming more irritable, or perhaps it was because all the nobodies were actually maturing into fine adults.
No…that couldn't be it.
But this year it was very different. Many of the members wondered whether they should buy a certain kind of gift for a certain new member of the organization. The day Xemnas found out the gender was the day many of the members where giving themselves a sigh of relief. Xemnas was keeping the child, and so now many of them wondered what to plan for. Their leader was having a little boy; so why not buy a gift to match it?
But their leader soon came across this idea, and he just as he dealt with Xaldin, he dealt with this problem.
It was also around this time Zexion made another hypothesis about the procreation of nobodies. He took notice in Number VIII and XI change in attitude and strength; both had become very lousy in behavior, and they both spent a majority of their time in their room; where it was warmest. He then concluded that weather and temperature may have and effect on nobodies.
Still no reason for his or Xemnas' element though.
He then made another conclusion that, since time and space does exist, that Number II and X would then be very much Number XIII; although they had a number fixed to them, they were pretty much normal in the…well…
And that's what happened during most of the month of December; nobodies got sick, got pissed, and two of them discovered that they just might want to buy a better form of protection.
As of December 12 Xemnas became seven months…and he entered the final stage of pregnancy.
Journal entry 632;
Ten rules; that is what should remain in the end. Ten simple rules, all with a huge punishment attached. If one cannot follow ten simple, easy to follow rules, then they do not belong in this organization. Yes, simple as that.
Secondly…
"…I would like all of you, starting tomorrow; to please refrain from bother Number III," I told the members below me. I could see smiles appear on several faces; they all knew what I was talking about.
"Tomorrow," Xigbar muttered with a smile. "That means a lot of poking today…"
"Silence," I said. I'm not taking this seriously. I smirk at the very idea.
I glance at Number II, Xaldin; the look on his face, it fuels with such desire to, once again, harm him. I know it is a terrible thought, but happiness can only be achieved by certain means, and violence towards him seems to be my way of achievement.
"Now, as for the…gathering that has been planned; the same rules apply to those of last year," I said. I glanced at those subordinates who would partake in such a strange ritual.
"Not a gathering," Demyx whined. "It's a party…"
I ignore him and continue on. "The party will end no later than ten thirty, and there will be mission on the twenty fifth, no exceptions."
"Awe," Xigbar said with a smirk. "You're really gonna do that Xemnas; you must really want coal in that stocking of yours."
He, of course, is joking. There is no stocking, there is nothing. I do not celebrate such a mixed up holiday.
"Aside from this, there is nothing else to be said," I finish. I wait a few seconds and sigh. I want the meeting to last longer. I spend most of the day resting, forced into a bed because I have obtained a condition that leaves me in a very fragile state. What little freedom I have; I want to use it all. I don't care that walking hurts my feet, I don't care if walking is hard as it is, I just hate being in that bed... "Does anyone have anything else to say?"
I glance at a raised hand and sigh. It belongs to Number XI.
"Yes," I hiss.
"I just wanted to say that I am very sorry for my past behavior, and that I really want to make it up to you, lord Xemnas," Marluxia said to me.
My eyes widen. Since when did he come to a realization that what he was doing was annoying me? When did he grow a frontal lobe? When did he grow a brain to begin with?
"Yeah, so, I was thinking," Marluxia continued. "Maybe…if it's not too much and since you only got two months left…"
I frown. "No"
"You…you didn't even let me finish," Marluxia said.
"I don't need to hear the rest," I said to the nobody. "I forgive your misbehavior, the conversation has ended."
"…" Marluxia sank into his seat. I have no idea what he was going to say, but he mentioned the horrid two months, and that's I need to know.
I am not upset about it at all, I'm grateful I managed this far without a problem .I have nothing to regret. I have nothing to worry over, even with preeclampsia. I just don't Marluxia talking about it…whatever he had planned; I want nothing to do with it. No…
"Is there anything else that needs to be said," I ask regrettably.
"Xemnas," Zexion said, "May I express my concerns?"
"You may," I tell him.
"The number of Heartless has grown a bit; they may be planning another attack." Zexion looked around the room then back at me. "We need to plan out a group that will be able to take down the numbers…at least till they reach normal levels."
I nod my head. "I'll have Number VII plan out a list and have him give you reports on possible members."
Zexion frowned at me. Did he not like my plan?
"Of course…"
"Is there a problem," I ask him.
"No..," Zexion said to me. "There is no problem."
"Good."
I sigh and feel exhausted. This meeting…its everything that tires me. I've become so tired. I need rest.
"Meeting adjourned," I mutter.
"We should do a secret Santa," Demyx chimed to Luxord as he stared at his hand of cards. "I mean, wouldn't it be fun?"
"Not so much if you consider that only a few members would partake in it," Luxord muttered.
"I don't see why," Demyx said. "I'm sure we can get Xigbar to join in…and Marluxia might be able to trick Vexen and Zexion in joining…" Demyx smiled even more. "Then again; Zexion might just do it anyway, he's practically become a member of the group."
"I doubt it will be enough to get him into the mood," Luxord said as he placed two face down cards on the pile. "Two fours."
"Bullshit," Axel said.
Luxord smirked.
"No...That's not what I meant; I mean Zexion being a part of the group…not the cards," Axel said defensively.
"What do you mean," Demyx asked.
"The guys only being nice to us now, once the kids out he'll be back to his old self," Axel said. He placed three cards onto the pile. "Three fives."
"That's not true," Demyx said. "He's a friend now."
"Maybe," Luxord murmured. "Or Axel may be right…only time will tell."
"Well," Demyx muttered. "I still think we should do secret Santa…"
"CAN YOU BELIEVE HIM," A voice yelled from the hallways. The three nobodies turned and glanced at the two nobodies who entered the room.
"Relax Mar," Larxene said with a smile. "You can't win them all…"
"I was being nice to him, "Marluxia said angrily, "AND HE BLEW ME OFF!"
"He probably knew what you were up to," Larxene said.
"Then he should've said yes," Marluxia hissed.
"What seems to be the problem; ladies," Axel asked the tow.
"Shut it," Marluxia said.
"Oh excuse me," Axel said. "What seems to be the problem…guys?"
Larxene gave Axel an ugly look.
"Immaturity will be the end of you," Luxord said as he glanced over to Demyx. "It's your turn."
"He should have said yes!" Marluxia said with much spite.
"You wanna let us in," Axel asked the pink haired nobody.
Marluxia glanced over to Axel and sighed. "I was going out of my way, MY WAY, to do something nice for Xemnas."
"And that would be…"
"You don't want to know," Larxene said with a cruel smile.
"I was going to throw the most spectacular, most lovely, well planned baby shower ever; in his honor, and he blows me of," Marluxia said in anger. "Can you believe that?"
"Yes," Axel said.
"I can see that," Luxord muttered.
"Totally," Demyx said.
On the other side of the room; Vexen and Lexaeus were shaking there heads. They too, could not believe what they were hearing…
"You guys all suck," Marluxia said.
"Xemnas is a guy," Axel said. "He hated it when I teased him about the little things…you think throwing a baby shower will help him feel better?"
"In all honesty," Luxord said to Marluxia, "you had good intention; but I think you forgot the most important detail…"
"What would that be," Marluxia said.
"The man has pride, "Luxord said. "He'll walk around with a baby in his abdomen, but he won't let himself fall to that kind of low."
"Low? LOW?!"
"To him," Luxord said, "it is…"
"Calm down Marly," Larxene said in a very angelic voice; "c'mon; we should get ready for our missions…don't let mean old' Xemnas bother you."
"…fine," Marluxia said.
"So," Axel said. "Where were we?"
But before Axel could find his place into he game, before Demyx could finally have his turn, and before Luxord could come to light as to why Larxene was so out of character; a portal opened and the familiar sight of a pissed off Saix, followed by a just as pissed Zexion, walked into the room.
"Why do I even bother," Axel said, dropping his hand down to the floor.
"Number VIII and Number XII," Saix called out immediately. Axel and Larxene turned to the blue haired nobody. "You both have a mission together."
"Oh goody," Axel said with a roll of his eyes.
Larxene back-handed Axel on the side of the head and smirked; oh the fund she would have today.
"Vexen," Zexion called. Vexen looked up from his seat and stared at his old friend with a very unsure look on his face. "You have been dismissed from your suspension; you and Xigbar will be on a mission together."
Vexen's eye widened in disbelief; his Superior had finally had his fill of punishing him.
"Well," Vexen muttered. He opened up a portal and sighed. He had been assigned a mission, which was great and all, but then again; it was with Xigbar. He got up from his seat and walked through; he was going to have to hunt for the man first…
Zexion turned to Lexaeus. "Same with you; we have a mission together as well."
Saix glared annoyingly at Zexion. He did not like having to work with the other. Nope, not at all. He turned to Demyx.
"Number IX; you will find Number's XIII and XIV and the three of you will go on a mission together, a heart collecting one."
Demyx nodded his head slowly, not liking the idea of fighting at all.
"Before you go," Zexion added, "I would like you to find and retrieve Number III; he has been assigned to a psychiatrist."
"Really," Demyx asked.
"Really," Zexion said.
Saix rolled his eyes and then turned to Luxord and Marluxia. "Number X and XI; the three of us have been assigned the duty of heartless control. We will remain on this world and destroy heartless till numbers have reached satisfactory levels."
Luxord sighed and collected his cards. Marluxia nodded his head, still very upset about the whole ordeal.
Zexion took a deep breath. Saix…was going to be here all day, and the castle would be empty. He had managed to keep the berserker at bay, making sure he was incapable of getting too close to Xemnas, for the rest of the sixth month. It actually wasn't as hard as he thought it would be; Luxord was constantly giving him reports…and Saix, as odd as it seemed, seemed to be almost…avoiding Xemnas.
But today…today he had to worry. He had done everything he could; he assigned Luxord the mission, and he gave Luxord smaller parts of the city to clean out. Saix had been given the main parts…where tons and tons of heartless would be. But he could only hope Saix wouldn't get the job done too fast. He had no idea what was going on in the Luna Diviners mind, and he did not want to find out. He was stuck praying that Luxord would hurry and finish his part, then watch over Xemnas.
Two month…no; one month and a few weeks, nothing more than that. He just had to get Xemnas as close to full term as possible; the idea of getting him to the exact date of normal birth would not be possible. Xemnas was becoming very irritable, and forcing his body to work too long would not be a good idea. Rest was good, but the sorcerer nobody was at wits end with resting all day. Zexion would have to induce labor as soon as the fetus was ready to go out. Shouldn't 'be too long…the child was actually quite healthy; something a bit surprising considering the conditions. He was at a good weight, he was developing well, and he seemed to be very active inside of Xemnas. Whether this was because Xemnas was strict and had kept himself on a decent diet, because it sure as hell wasn't sleep (he was awake all the time during the first half of the pregnancy; remember?), or whether it was Saix's strong genes, but the child was as healthy and happy as can be. It was almost as if Xemnas didn't have preeclampsia at all. But he did…and Saix wasn't pleased with Xemnas' decision. In the end, he juts couldn't risk it. Even if the picture was just Namine being creative; or the picture was just the two being intimately with each other…
That picture…
No…it didn't matter whether Xemnas was cowering or not, whether he was simply in some god damn sex position, or whether he was looking for a fucking penny! Saix was in the picture…and he was standing…and he…
He…
"Number VI," Saix said. "Are you ready to depart?"
Zexion looked up and stared at the nobody before him. He had never felt so much fear in his life.
It would either happen today…or it would not happen at all.
"I'm…ready," Zexion said to Saix. He hoped he was ready.
Saix opened up a portal. Zexion watched Lexaeus walkthrough, disappearing in the darkness. Now or never…Zexion took a step n, and he felt a wave of guilt hit him as he did.
This day…would be the worst day of his life.
Who are you?
I'm asking this more and more lately; time is running rout and I still don't know you too well. Everything has a name to it, and even you have one already placed on you; you have not shown me this…and I only have so much time left before you leave me. I need to know who you are; I need to know what to call you when I meet you. What is your name? Surely you can tell me, I would like to think I am deserving of this, unless you do not think I've proven myself worthy of your forgiveness yet?
"It is a fetus," Zexion said to me as I lay down on my back. "He does not know what is going on; and what he does hear means nothing of value to him."
"…"
"Xemnas; his whole world is nothing more than the small amount of space he has," Zexion continued. "He knows very little about outside, and all he knows is you. I wouldn't worry too much about forgiveness."
I want to be ready when you leave; I want everything to be perfect. I want to make sure you are brought into a world that would safe and well brought out for you. It's hard; The World That Never Was is not a place for raising a child. There is no sun, and it's always raining. Heartless are all over the world; you have a heart that they'll try to steal from you. I don't think I could bear the idea of you losing your heart either.
But this is the least of my problems. You are not even ready for this world; you are still in need of my protection.
"So Xemnas," Xigbar said with a smirk; he is always smirking…its becoming rather annoying now. Mood swings…I'm getting them again.
"Yes Number II," I ask.
"I was thinking; all natural…or with a scalpel?"
I still have no real idea as to how such an occurrence began in the first place. I do find this rather bothersome; a male getting pregnant is bound to face some difficulties. What exactly would happen when labor was achieved? Where would the child go? Males lack a birth canal; and creating one would only lead to destruction of the glands that are located within the perineum. Unless there is more than what Zexion has learned to achieve; I technically will not be able to give birth. It's no real problem by me, I have no real urge to naturally give birth; I've seen what it takes…and I'm not ashamed to say I don't have it within me to perform such an act.
I'll leave it to Xigbar to open me up. Yes, the best memory of giving birth is to not have one at all.
"Are you sure," Xigbar said with a smile. "I'm pretty sure Vexen and I can cook something up in the time you have left."
"I don't wish to have to deal with such a thing," I answer in disgust.
"Awe…but cesareans take all the fun out…"
I appreciate the fact that I can and have the option; but there are just some things I would rather not endure. Besides; a natural birth seems unlikely as I will probably have to have you removed before I even reach full term. Preeclampsia, no matter how light the form may be; it is still preeclampsia. I'm not in the danger zone yet; but I'm getting closer and closer to it. Protein in urine; it's the worst symptom that I have, and its low on the percentage scale, but it still means that my kidneys are over worked. I'm always thinking about this; I have this and I want to know why. There are so many theories as to why this may have happened to me. There is no real base reason though; I'm left to guess. I could blame so many things, and I feel anger because I want a definite reason. I want to know so that I could try to help myself. The only know human cure is birth, but I know I can find another…
I want you to be ready for life; I don't want you leaving to early. I don't want to feed you steroids, not even a little. You have to be prepared when you enter this world.
"So," Lexaeus said to Zexion. "I guess we can assume the child's element is that of the moon?"
Zexion glanced over to me, then back to Lexaeus. "I do not know; it could be…or it could be nothingness."
"A berserker powered by nothingness," I ponder.
"Then again," Zexion said. "That isn't to say that the child has an element of its own."
"That could be true," Lexaeus muttered. "The child does have a heart…it may not even need an element to begin with."
I look up at Lexaeus in confusion. "How so?"
"If it has a heart it may be able to unleash berserk form faster; it has true emotions after all…"
"…"
Who are you?
I'm afraid you'll find out eventually; it will only be a matter of time before you do. You'll grow up and you'll find out there was a time I didn't want you, you'll be upset and you may even hate me. I'm not sure how I'll prepare for this, but I know one day you'll come to this. I know you'll forgive me eventually, but I don't want you to hate me. I just don't.
"What happens; happens," Xigbar said while lying on the surgical table. "Look; kids don't come with manuals…but let me be the first to say it; he will hate you at some point."
"Please be serious," I say tiredly.
"I am," Xigbar said with a smile. "Every kid hates their parents in some point of their life…If I were you; I'd tell him when he hits thirteen…he'll have enough reason to hate by then."
I shake my head.
…
…
Waking up to an almost completely empty castle is an odd thing. I portaled to the Grey Area, only seeing Xaldin. He was to leave for the psychiatrist that I assigned him to, in hopes of fixing the mess I've caused, and he was soon gone. I was alone in the Castle That Never Was.
A few steps. A few more steps after that. My feet are sore. I'm already tired. I can't float all too well with my body being imbalanced like this. Portaling will only do me so much; I still have to walk.
I'm alone.
Why am I bothered by this?
I want someone to talk to. I want to hear the other members.
Anxiety; I wonder if this happens with all pregnancies? I should calm down; if I get too nervous, you'll freak out. I can't have you doing that at seven months…you could probably induce labor all on your own now. You've gotten quite big; a kick is more than enough to bring me all the discomfort in the world.
I sigh. I haven't eaten yet; I've slept so much, I've missed morning meals. My schedule has gone down the drain; I hope you are happy. You got extra rest but now you are lacking in nutrients.
I stare at the window and gaze up at Kingdom Hearts.
I still want a heart, despite you being one for me. You can make me feel; but I still want one of my own. You'll never understand this desire of mine. It is a wonderful thing that you come with a heart; you'll have so much to experience.
Can you please refrain from harsh movement right now?
I sight and place my gloved hand on my stomach, try desperately to soothe the pain coming from within. How big is this child now? How could something so small contain so much strength? For this child to posses this much power, and a t such a young age; it really makes me see how powerful Saix truly is. What I see in the battlefield; he must only be using a small percentage of what he truly posses'.
Saix…
"Number VI," Zexion muttered. I glance up at him and wit for him to finish the sentence. "He's…been rather busy; hasn't he?"
"He has," I answer. "I asked him to do an important favor."
"A favor," Zexion said. "And you are sure he is completing the task given?"
"Yes," I said to Zexion. "He always does what he is asked to do…" I know he's taking his time with this, but I do not mind. He needs time to think; he needs to find out the true meaning of what I told him. It took me months, but I know he will get it done sooner. He is patient and will take full concentration on the matter.
You do not know him yet. He hasn't had much time either; he is still trying to figure things out. You will meet him soon though. You'll see where you've gained your abilities from.
I know he'll make a good parent to this child.
I know he's excited to meet you, just as much as I am. He just needs time to figure the more complicate parts out. But he will see.
Clearing out the heartless was not a difficult task whatsoever for Luxord as he lifted his hand up and slashed away the last of the heartless. Being assigned the smaller parts of the city districts; hmm…it was if Zexion didn't think Luxord could handle a few heartless. Well; he had gotten done nice and early; the day was juts over half done…and there would be plenty time for him to get to the castle and keep and eye over Xemnas. Saix would be busy for a while; even if he had worked over time. He had been assigned the much larger areas…it would take at least another hour or two before he got down with his job. Yes; Luxord was sure that he wouldn't have to worry for a while, no need for him to hurry and run over just to watch Xemnas take a nap.
"Luxord," a voice called from behind. Luxord turned around and stared at a very tired looking Marluxia. He seemed out of breath and out of shape. He was a tad pale and his scythe hung sadly on him. "Could you be willing to help me out?"
Luxord could easily guess as to why Marluxia asked this. It was winter, it was cold and Marluxia was way out of his league right now. Plants don't do all too well in the darkness…and now with the temperature dropping…
…but did he have time to help out the other?
"You seemed rather exhausted," Luxord said with a smile. He needed to figure just how much the other had gotten done. Maybe…if Marluxia had finished more than half; he would have time to help out, but only a little bit. "How many districts did you clear out?"
"Only three," Marluxia said with a sigh. "It's really hard…I'm not moving as fast as I should be…and my scythe appears to be duller than usual." Marluxia took another gulp of air. "Are you done…?"
"Well yes," Luxord said in a very unsure matter.
"Can you please," Marluxia said with a puppy dog stare.
"Well…," Luxord said. Only three district…and out of the ten he was assigned. Marluxia had average size districts too; it would take awhile before he got to clearing them all out. Would Saix be done by then?
"Please," Marluxia said. "I tell you what Larxene bought you for Christmas."
"Larxene bought me something for Christmas," Luxord asked.
"Yeah," Marluxia said. "She said its super special, and it's a secret too."
"A secret," Luxord said.
"Yeah," Marluxia said. "Not even she would tell me about it…."
"Then how could you possibly tell me what it is, "Luxord asked. "If it's such a secret?"
"She gave me a hint," Marluxia said. He smirked. "And considering how much you love games and all…I'm sure you can come to a conclusion or two."
A damn; Marluxia had sunk Luxord's ego-battle ship. Curiosity immediately grabbed hold of him as he couldn't help but wonder what the Savage Nymph had purchased for him. Even worse; he had not even bothered…he was never one for the silly holiday stuff…though he was one for the parties. He had to know…he needed to know; that way he could get her something better.
"Ok then," Luxord said. "I'll help you clear out a few of your districts," Luxord said. "But only a few; I have a very important duty assigned to me."
"Thank you soooo much," Marluxia said with glee. He attempted to give the Gambler of Fate a hug, but Luxord was too quick and luckily dodged the awkward moment.
"So," Luxord asked. "What districts have you yet to clear?"
"Well, I guess the closest ones would be ten and six," Marluxia said.
"Very well," Luxord said.
"Hey Luxord," Marluxia said.
"What?"
"Since when have you and Larxene been such good friends," Marluxia asked. "I mean; she isn't one to open up to others, but she's always talking about you now." Marluxia frowned. "It's really…odd, you know?"
"Marluxia," Luxord said with a sigh. "I think we need to have a talk…" (Who else loves the I'm dating your best friend talk?)
Saix looked around the grey area and was surprised to find he alone in the castle. He was sure the other two would have finished before him; Number X had been given a rather doable amount, and Number XI had been given a decent amount as well. If anything; Saix had been given the major bulk of the work. He had fought in the major parts of the city and the bigger parts as well. He had to deal with a ton of heartless; shadows and Neo. And yet; he was alone with no one else.
Saix took a few steps over to the white furniture and sighed. He sank into the seat and immediately began to ponder over Xemnas' whereabouts. He needed to see the other; he needed to tell him the truth. Lying would do no good, but even if he told the truth…it would still do no good. Xemnas was bound and determined to have this child. If Saix did tell him that he disliked it. It would not really mater; Xemnas was sure to still produce the child into this world. There would be nothing to stop this; it would happen no matter what he did. Unless the child left the world, or unless the child died; he would have it within the castle. He would see it everyday, a constant remainder of what he could never do for Xemnas, what he could not make. He was a nobody…and only one with a heart could give Xemnas the love. It had done this; this thing that took everything away from him. And now it was going to take Xemnas away from him. Xemnas would choose the child over Saix any day; he had done so so many times before. Xemnas chose the child over freedom, he chose the child over his own health and well being, and he chose the child over satisfaction…over him. Xemnas was sick with a disease…and it was that entire child's fault. Xemnas was always tired, always weak, and it was its entire fault. But Xemnas would not listen to reason; he would not remove the blasted thing from him. He wanted it to continue to sap away at his life; to take away more and more and more. And now Saix had nothing of his own; this child had even stolen from him. Times, love, and Xemnas…what little he had was gone. No secrets, no nothing. And was he even trying to defend these things, no; he wasn't. He was to busy trying to please his lord that he let the child take and take; he wouldn't dare say a thing. But now? What would he do now? He had seen the name of the disease; he had heard Xemnas' claim that he possessed it, and he had took the time and liberty of finding more about it. Xemnas could die; Xemnas could continue to suffer even after the child left him. Xemnas could die. He might get too sick. He could die. Xemnas had to rest all day long. Die.
Saix got up from the furniture. He could…fade away. So many horrible things could happen to Xemnas from this point and on. The toxima could progress; he could get the next stage, and he could die. He would fade away like a dream and Saix would lose him forever. But the child would live…Zexion would make sure the monstrosity would live. It was not fair that this creature be given a better chance of survival than Xemnas. What was worse; Xemnas was allowing this. He would let it grow in him, he would let it lavish in its safe world, and he would let his sickness grow and broil. It would kill him…and nobody cared.
Saix cared.
Saix cared quite a bit.
He got up from the seat and summoned up a portal. Xemnas was not here, and considering he was limited in transportation, floating and walking was not much of a help to him; he would have to be in his room. He would be resting, that life sucking child, and he would suspect a visit from Saix, and he would not suspect Saix at all. Saix felt a bit unsure for a moment; he still felt great adoration for his leader, and to explain to him that this would not work out…he didn't want to risk disapproval. But…it had to be done. He knew Xemnas was being tricked somehow, and it was his job to save him; even if he had to save Xemnas from his own self. It was his job to help his lord Xemnas, and he would help him. He would do the only right thing there was to do; the only just and obvious thing that he, as an intelligent man, could come up with;
He would remove it.
Saix walked through the portal, letting the darkness engulf him. He had never felt so eager to see his leader; he had never felt such excitement burn within him. And in the few seconds it took for him to appear in his leader's room, Saix felt his mind gradually leave him, to be replaced with the dangerous powers he had been graced with as a nobody.
He could feel his berserker instincts silently creep over him; telling him how and what to do. Take your time; you need not kill Xemnas in this process; you can be graceful and gentle even in this from. His eyes glowed maliciously as he hovered over the sleeping body beneath him. He stared at the lovely form, asleep and at peace. He had been asleep when he left for the mission, and he was asleep now. Xemnas was always asleep. He had such little energy in him now.
But soon he would have it back, he would soon return to the man he once was. He would be the strong capable nobody he was once, before all of this happened. And although he may not understand now; he would come to see that he was wrong. Saix didn't mind this; he could handle the thought of Xemnas being wrong just once. This was something very unexpected after all; nobody could have predicted that he would have ended up with a child, no not a child; this demon. Ah, but Saix was willing to accept that Xemnas was wrong on this. He would be the one to correct him this time; he would save Xemnas from this strange spell that was cast upon him. He would rid of the bad that had tainted his soul.
But as Saix was about to summon up his weapon; he saw those eyes open just slightly. He stared into two tired amber eyes; blinking in a daze as they tried to make out the figure above them. Saix held his breath.
Amber eyes opened up in surprise; they blinked and stared curiously up at the glowing yellow eyes, not realizing that the eyes were that of a berserker, and not a lover. Two tired hands reached up bad felt the soft blue hair that hung from Saix's head, touching and sliding the thin, tanned fingers through it. Saix watched the tired eyes light up with happiness, Xemnas was pleased to have Saix visit him, and after so long too; the nobody almost lost his place and actually got up from the bed a little, just to get a closer look at his Saix. Saix did not move; his body rigid and stiff from the shock of it all. Xemnas pulled his hands away from the blue hair and blinked a few more times, letting reality come to him as he came to realization that he was not asleep anymore and that Saix was really here with him. Saix felt a warm hand touch his face and saw a small smile appear on the others face and he almost felt regret for what he was doing.
Almost; but that was what separated him from those who had a heart.
Warning!
And so when Xemnas was forced down to the bed, a hand tightly wrapped around his neck, claws sinking in to the soft skin; Saix was not surprised by this at all. He was surprised when those eyes changed from happy to horror, when he heard a soft whimper escape from the other. He pressed more strength in to the other, forcing that body down on the bed, his other hand on Xemnas' thigh. He glared at those amber eyes; which were now filled with fear and doubt, and he could feel the free leg wiggle and move about. The body was desperate for air; he heard more whimpering and the body began to jerk in a very strange matter.
Saix then realized that he was simply here to kill one, not both, so he let go of the throat go for a few moments and let the poor desperate body breath in the air it needed. And then he grabbed again; giving the other no time to speak or realize what was truly going on. But Saix was smart and had learned from his small mistake; he would give air to the body, he would not let Xemnas suffer much longer.
Xemnas was not to found of this. His eyes watered as he felt his body once again asphyxiate. He used what little strength he had to grab hold of Saix's arm. He had no idea what was going on. And it was this one fact that made him summon up his blade, still holding on to Saix; so that it may pierce through the others arm. And he summoned up the red blade and as it did the sound of skin being stabbed, the sound of muscle and flesh being torn and singed filled the air.
Saix hissed in pain and backed away from Xemnas. He grabbed on to his arm; he could smell his blood and the awful smell of burning flesh. He stared at the terrible scene that was his arm; he could see nothing but red, a tinge of brown and black, but mostly red. His arm was oozing the liquid. He was only too lucky that he had the moon; a wound like this; even though it had not pierced an artery or broken a bone; could have been the death of him. He removed his hand and stared at the messy mixture of blood and melted flesh. Very lucky the moon was out tonight. He glared at Xemnas, and without much thought; went completely berserk.
I thought it was a dream at first. I thought it was some sort of dream, those dreams humans often get in times of physical urge and need. But as I touched the hair and felt its soft texture, and somehow I knew he was real. He was here for me and I thought it was wonderful. I didn't care about anything else at that point; just being with him was all it mattered. I moved myself up a little closer, as close as I could without putting pressure on my abdomen, and I stared at that solemn face. He looked so serious, so upset. I had no idea why; I would make him feel better. I touched that soft face; that warm face that I missed so much. There was so much I wanted to say, so much I wanted to hear from him. I wanted him to say it; that he had thought about everything; that he was ready to share this glorious experience with me. I smiled at this very thought, and I smiled at him. He was here.
And the next thing I knew…
I cannot breathe.
I can't breathe.
Why can't I breathe?
I'm staring at Saix still; my body feels heavy and it hurts to keep my eyes open. I'm afraid. I cannot breathe. He won't let go of me. Why does he have his arms around my neck?
I can feel myself squirming; it's too hard to move and control myself.
My eyes hurt, I feel tears and my vision is clouding.
Saix…
Blood, I can feel it running down my neck. He's so deep inside my neck.
Why?
But as I feel my energy quickly drain from me; he lets go. I gasp for air and I'm trying to not panic. It feels so good to have fresh air within me. I try to talk; I try to talk to him and find out what's going on, but he grabs onto me and reestablishes the grip on me; just a little restricting though. I feel tears roll down my face and at that moment, I feel fear take over.
He's trying to kill me.
Instinct takes over at this point. I do not know why he is doing this; nor do I want to know. I have to fight back. I lift up my arm and grab on to his arm; the one that's keeping me from breathing. I summon my blade and hear an awful sound; he is the one making it. I can smell flesh being burned and feel relief as I can once again breathe.
I watch Saix back away and inspect his wound. There's a lot of blood. He should leave; he knows better than to challenge me. That wound will easily become infected if he doesn't act quickly.
I watch him. Why is he doing this?
He looks at me.
I watch in fear, I feel all confidence within me fade; those eyes are no longer his.
I back away just a little. I must remain calm; there is a way to victory, but one must remain calm in order to fulfill the right plan as to do so. Saix gets up and continues to stare at me. I know those eyes; and I've never had to fear them this much.
Why would he do that?
What did I do to him?
"Saix," I whisper. "Saix…"
Those eyes just stare at me; examining me; looking at all my weaknesses; and he's trying to pick out a favorite and use it against me.
There are so many for him to pick from.
But my worst nightmare appears as his eyes lower down to my abdomen; and I stare in horror as he glares at it. A smile forms and the predator has made its decision. A sick, cruel smile.
I know why he came; it wasn't to see me. I feel more tears run down my face.
It wasn't to kill me. Warm, wet tears; I'm crying. I don't think I've ever cried before; not like this.
He's here to kill you.
Saix pounced on Xemnas, pissed beyond all belief. Nobody attacks him and gets away with it! Never! He would make this poor creature pay for its actions against him; in blood and tears. It would beg for death; it would die. Yes; Saix had let go, and he was now willing to have Xemnas' suffer for those actions. It wasn't that he did not care; he just couldn't control himself any longer.
Saix bite hard on Xemnas' neck, easily spilling blood with his sharp incisors, and he lapped up the sweet coppery taste as his own. He heard a gasp of pain and he heard more whimpering underneath him. He felt the body squirm and Saix grabbed hold of those frantic arms and held them down with juts one hand. It was all too easy. He bit down harder, careful not to rip and tear away flesh; but rapid enough to cause absolute misery to one under him. He could feel his teeth rip through muscle fiber and the sound of groaning and the smell of salty tears was wonderfully pleasurable to Saix. He was showing this whelp who was boss.
Released his grip on Xemnas' neck, knowing that the other was intelligent enough to not fight back, and he lifted his body up a bit. He kept his hand on those wrists; squeezing his hand tightly and causing the wrist to darken and twitch in pain. He let his nails dig deep into them. He wanted this being to know pain; the pain he was feeling now; and he was going to have it doubled. He could no longer feel the pain in his arm, not in his current form, but it was beside the point.
And with his other hand; Saix summoned up his weapon. He knew it wouldn't take much to slice Xemnas open; his blade was nice and sharp; and the skin was so thing and easily broken. He smirked and aimed his blade at the bare, open flesh. It wouldn't be hard at all.
But Xemnas had very different plans on his mind. He was afraid, but he would not let fear get the better hold of him. He jerked and moved around as much as he could; knowing it would not protect him from the blade, but as long as Saix missed it would be worth it. He felt the grip on his wrists tighten even more and he winced in agony as he felt blood begin to leaked from the not only the wounds the sharps nails had created; but a bit from his fingernails. No…he had to keep going. Xemnas struggled more; trying to free at least one of his legs from Saix. He didn't want this…
Saix forced his blade down. He heard a cry of pain and frowned at the mess he had just made. He missed; thanks to Xemnas, and his blade only grazed the others side. But his weapon was quite jagged in form; so graze was really a bunch of torn, tattered flesh, and a ton of blood leaking from it. He inhaled and could smell the awful scent of Xemnas' body. No; he did not like this one bit; look at what Xemnas had done now!
Saix let his weapon drop, and in an attempt to punish the other; he swiped at Xemnas' face; his sharp claws leaving thin red lines behind. This time Xemnas was silent. Saix hit him again; harder and harder, over and over again. He stared don at the older nobody and was surprised to see a rather confident composure on the other's face, He could smell the fear, even with the scent of blood filling the room; but Xemnas would not let Saix see this, not in his current for where he would practically relish in the fear. Saix stared at the tear stained face; he could see sweat and he could tell the other was in quite a bit of pain. But he had that face on; and it sent Saix into an even deeper frenzy.
Saix let go of the wrists and grabbed on to both of Xemnas' shoulders. He immediately felt the other began to struggle, and he was not surprised to see those hands reach out for him. But he would not let Xemnas touch him this time. He let go of one shoulder for just a second, and without a care of the world, hit Xemnas hard in the chest. He had aimed lower, but he was in too much of a hurry to protect himself from the frightened nobody. Xemnas fell back into the bed, and he wrapped his arms around the aching area. Saix got off of the bed. He grabbed Xemnas by his silvery hair and lifted him up. Xemnas winced in even more pain, but did not struggle at all. He lifted himself up, his arms still around himself, and stared with half open eyes at Saix. Saix gave Xemnas a little shake; taking a bit of pleasure as he now had complete control of the other, and without warning; resummoned his weapon in his hand and hit Xemnas hard on the head with the blunt side of his weapon.
He let go of the now limp body and let it fall to the floor. Saix stared at the pathetic from beneath him. He walked around it once, twice, and once more for precautionary measures. Saix got down on his knees and grabbed hold of Xemnas by the arm. He lifted the body up and stared at the barely conscious man. He had a nasty cut on his forehead…ahh, but it would heal. Just like the wound on his side; it was his own fault that it had happened; he should have known better than to fight back. Saix felt a throb on his shoulder run down all through his arm. He stared at his purpling arm and then at Xemnas. He lifted himself back up, and grabbed tightly on to his claymore. Xemnas would not move; he had no idea what was coming to him. Saix shoved the weapon down, letting half of his blade slice through into Xemnas' arm; a little bit of payback for what he received. Xemnas' eye widened up and he shook in pain. He couldn't make a sound though, and that was the worst of it. He felt the hot stinging pain in his arm grow and grow and he couldn't do a thing about it. He took a deep breath and felt more tears run down his face. It was a miracle he hadn't been killed himself; Saix was doing such horrendous acts…
He should give up, give up and maybe Saix would calm down.
The thought seemed quite doable at the moment too. If he submitted to the other perhaps it would be enough to calm the beast within the nobody. He would receive more pain, but he knew Saix would be satisfied quicker if he didn't fight back. He had to let the other have his way…
Xemnas took another weak breath as he felt a small tug from his pants. Saix was still hovering above him, and there was so much for the Berserker to do before killing the problem. He would remind Xemnas who was in charge right now, and he would take his time with the kill. Saix removed the weapon and tossed it aside, letting it fade away as he began to commit his next act against his Superior.
Xemnas didn't fight back. He would let this happen; maybe Saix would forget…
Xemnas gave a small gasp as he felt his only article of clothing being removed from him. He immediately grabbed his stomach; he knew it was the only thing worth protecting at this point. He had fallen…and he had white out for a few seconds; but surely the child was still safe. He could feel movement, and that was a good sign. He knew the child was worried; detecting fear and pain from the world around him. Xemnas kept his arms around himself; he would let Saix do what he will, as long as his son was safe. It was all that mattered. A small fall; nothing more than just a small fall. Blood; he had plenty of that in him. Shock…he could only hope it wouldn't claim him; no pain was never a good sign.
What about inducing labor?
At that moment, Xemnas began to worry. Saix was not all there; he would not be gentle. He could end up inducing if Saix was too rough with him.
Mercy. Now was the time to beg. Your child will not survive this world as he is now; beg for mercy. Plead with him. Do not let him take the only thing you posses.
Xemnas was flipped on to his back and Xemnas stared up at the cruel, glowing eyes above him. He knew fighting would be pointless; he would have to try to reason with Saix. He felt his body shiver in fear; his eyes release more tears.
"Saix," Xemnas whispered frantically. He let his good arm up and touched the Luna Diviners face. He kept his arm up, despite it feeling heavy, and he stared at the frightening figure above him. "Saix…please…"
Saix stopped his advancement and, for the briefest of moments; went back into sanity. His eyes dulled in color and his rabid expression cooled down to that of his usual. He almost had a sad look on his face; upset that he had caused so much pain for the other. And then tears formed. Saix was back and all he could see was the terrible thing he had just done. Xemnas was on the floor, he was bleeding from all over, he was cut up and bruised; he was in so much pain.
"…Xemnas," Saix whimpered weakly.
Xemnas smiled just a little. He was still afraid, but he had calmed the other. "Saix…"
"It'll be ok," Xemnas continued. He let his hand tangle in the blue hair, and he felt more fear fade away.
"It…will be ok," Saix muttered. He looked at Xemnas once more, and he his eyes locked back to Xemnas' abdomen. He could see Xemnas' other hand, the one colored in red; all over the stomach, protecting what needed to go.
"Yes," Xemnas said.
"It…will be ok," Saix said. He got closer to Xemnas.
Xemnas felt the other move closer to him, he felt the others face graze against his and he could feel the wet from Saix's tears rub against his face. Xemnas felt all fear fade away. Saix was back, and he knew it would be ok. Xemnas…Xemnas would forgive Saix. He would come to accept this all as a minor mistake. Saix was just confused…it was just an accident; he would tell the other this. They would not punish Saix; he had already learned his lesson.
I calmed myself and was only to happy to accept his silent apology. I felt him nest on my shoulder and I felt him nuzzle against my wound. I wince a little as he kissed the bite mark, soft gentle kisses. He is sorry. I relax even more and I feel his arm wrap around me and support me. It's wet with blood, but he does not seem to mind supporting my weight. That's good; I'm too tired to keep myself up. He moves closer and I can feel the heat radiate from his warm body. He presses against me and it feels nice against my bare body.
He's sorry. I forgive him.
I relax and he guides me to the cool floor and he continues to keep close to me. My side hurts so much, but his hand glides over it and puts some pressure on it to help soothe the bleeding. He has his other hand touching the wound on my forehead, trying to examine it to see how bad it was. It would heal; I would be ok, he has nothing to worry over. I feel a small lick as he drinks up the red liquid and his hands began to trail across my pained body; trying to soothe the pain. I close my eyes.
I'm tired.
I'm so tired.
I open my eyes and he is standing above me. Hovering over me. I stare tiredly at him, wondering what he is up to. Why is he so far up?
"I'm sorry," Saix whispers.
"I forgive you," I tell him.
"…"
"I will always forgive you," I tell him. He looks at me with so much surprise and he seems to be unsure about my comment. It's not that hard to understand.
"You will," Saix asks me with doubt.
"I will," I answer him.
"...," Saix frowns at me.
"I love you," I whisper. I feel tears fall down my eyes and down my cheeks and I can hear them fall and hit the floor.
He stares at me with so much doubt. He closes his eyes, trying to find it in himself to grab hold of those words, for the first time. He opens his eyes and smiles at me.
"I love you too," he says.
"I forgive you," I tell him again.
"It will be ok Xemnas," Saix said to me.
"I know it will be ok," I tell him. I reach my hand out to him. I want him back down here with me. He shakes his head.
"It…will be ok," he says once more. I see more tears run down his face. He lifts up his boot; high, up in the air. I can see the sole of the boot, the bottom rubbery part of the boots; and its right above the one place…the one place…
…oh; he remembers you.
Saix stares down at me.
He's too strong; there is no way I can stop that. Not now; not when I'm so tired and weak. I've lost too much blood, too much strength. He knows this; he knows this and he is taking advantage of it.
I stare up at him.
Goodbye…
Reviews much apprecited.
I'm sorry for not warning you all the first time. I'm really upset. I should have put up a warning in the first time. I didn't think; I thought since it was already censored that it would be suitable for you all to read. But it wasn't; some of you may have gotten hurt. I don't want you to be too upset with what happened. I'm sorry guys. Do not let my immaturity affect your day.