**Warning – graphic violence – if this is a trigger for you skip this chapter, or only read the last part. **

**Edward**

I punished Phil for everything. Every slap, push, and threat he gave to Bella, I extracted pain from him in retribution. The monster in me reveled in the blood and the sounds of his suffering.

For the terror she lived in, I broke every single bone in his body. One at a time. I started with his hands, snapping each digit, taking my time as he begged me to stop. I ignored him and moved to his feet, crushing each toe. I stamped on his legs, listening to his bones crunch, the monster in me howling in delight at his pleas to leave him alone.

For the years he took from her with her father, I sliced cuts in his flesh using his own knife—deep enough to bleed and cause horrific pain, but not enough to kill him.

For the emotional abuse he caused her, I partially crushed his larynx so he couldn't do anything except gurgle his agony—I was tired of his moans and pleas anyway. He deserved no mercy, because he had never shown Bella any.

I paced around his body, knowing his time was almost over. I leaned down, making sure I had what was left of his attention. The smelling salts I had brought to the house a few days ago helped me keep him somewhat alert.

"I can hear your thoughts, Phil. All of them. You deserved this and more. If I could keep you alive for days and torture you, I would. I want you to know the money you keep thinking of, the huge pile of cash you were going to use to disappear after hurting my Bella? I'm giving it to her. She is going to benefit. I'm sure she'll find lots of things to spend it on."

I knew she would refuse it, probably want to give it to a charity, but he had no clue.

His eyes blazed with hatred, but he was too weak to move. He was rapidly fading, unable to breathe and the pain was overwhelming him.

"You hurt, abused, and used an innocent child years ago—someone you should have protected. And because you are stupid, you couldn't leave it alone." I shook my head. "You made a mistake coming here, and touching what is mine, thinking you could hurt her." I raised my leg and stomped, feeling his remaining ribs shatter.

Blood seeped from his mouth.

"Edward."

My father's voice startled me.

"Enough. You've had your revenge. Finish it and let it go."

I shook my head. "It will never be enough."

He stepped forward. "Make it be enough. Remember who you are. Bella needs you. Not the man seeking revenge, but her lover, her protector."

"I'm not a man." I indicated Phil and his dying body. "I'm a monster."

"We all are," he snapped. "I fight the monster in me every day. I control it, not the other way around. You do, as well."

"The monster won today."

"Because it had to. As much as I hate to admit it, this man had to die. But let it be enough now. Find your strength and go to the woman who needs you. She is falling apart."

"I have to end this."

He tossed me the knife. "Then do it. You can't kill him anymore. He's already dead."

I stared down at the carcass. He was right.

A moment later, Phil's own knife cut through flesh and bone, piercing his heart and extinguishing his evil forever. His empty shell was all that remained. Raising my arm, I slashed and tore, and in minutes his body was in pieces, and it no longer resembled that of a human being.

I stood, panting and spent over his body, my hand clenching the knife so hard, it began to crack under my grip. Carlisle spoke again.

"I put clothes in the bathroom. Shower and clean yourself up and get to Bella. You can't go to her in this state."

I looked down, seeing my blood-soaked clothes and skin for the first time. He was right—if Bella saw me like this, she would freak out. I glanced around the room. Blood dripped from the walls. Pieces of flesh and bone were strewn around. It was a room of nightmares and horror.

"The remains . . ."

"I'll take care of it, then make sure the fire starts. It will be slow but as it builds, there will be nothing left of the house or anything inside it."

"You can't be near the flames."

"I won't be. I have it planned. You need to leave with Bella. Drive to the campground we agreed on. Wait for my call."

My body shook as I took in what I had done.

"Father . . ."

His hand was heavy on my shoulder. "Edward, all your life you have thought of yourself as a monster. You're wrong. You were made from love. The love your mother and I shared. Still share. Something so beautiful could never have produced a monster." His impassioned words stopped me. "I know you struggle. We do, as well. But we find our salvation with each other. I would kill anything and anyone who threatened to harm Esme. It doesn't make me a monster. It makes me a male in love." His voice quietened. "I would do the same for you."

I met his gaze and indicated the body. "But I enjoyed that. Every second of it." I had. The monster in me had taken great pleasure in every drop of blood he shed, the gruesomeness of the violence.

"There was a vampire once that decided your mother should belong to him rather than me. Do you know what I felt when I tore his head from his body?"

I shook my head.

"Satisfaction. Complete and utter satisfaction. No guilt, no remorse. He threatened her, and us. I ended him. And I would do it again. So I do understand."

"You never said . . ."

"I never told anyone. Not even your mother. But I'm telling you now, so you know. We all struggle. Sometimes it gets the best of us." He tightened his hand. "But, my son, you are not a monster, unless you allow yourself to be."

His words sank in and without a backward glance I went upstairs and let the hot water wash away the blood and flesh clinging to my skin. I pulled on the sweats and shirt, then went downstairs.

Carlisle handed me the sweater that brought Bella over to her house in the first place. "This was on the floor in the kitchen. Be patient. Ease her mind and let tonight go, Edward. Don't dwell on it. Move forward and leave him behind."

"I will."

"You've found the light you needed. Leave the darkness."

I nodded.

"Go."

~o0o~

Bella stared out the window. She hadn't said a word since I walked into the house. She had allowed me to embrace her, but her body was stiff in my arms. I took the small bag from my mother, hurried Bella out to the large SUV, and we drove along backroads until we reached the spot Carlisle and I had agreed on. The story would be Bella and I were taking advantage of the nice weather and camping, and we would arrive back to discover the accident that had destroyed her house.

I shut off the engine and turned to her. Her mind was blank. There was no static, no thoughts flickering through. It was as if she had shut down. She still hadn't moved or acknowledged my presence. Was she frightened of me now? By exacting revenge, had I lost her?

"Bella."

She jumped. I drew in a deep breath, trying to find the patience I needed to handle this situation.

"There is a tent, or I can leave you in the car, and stay outside."

Her brow furrowed. When she spoke, her voice was low and rough. I knew she'd been crying. I had seen it in my mother's thoughts, heard my father's words. Still, the sound of her voice made me wince.

"Do you want to leave me alone?" She whispered.

"No." I frowned. "What is it, kitten? Why are you holding yourself back from me? Do I disgust you now?"

"Can you forgive me?"

"Forgive you? For going over to the house when I told you not to? It was an error in judgment. I know that."

"No. For what you had to do. To protect me. Because of me, you became the thing you hate the most."

In one movement, I slid back my seat, unbuckled her belt, and dragged her onto my lap. She was shaking, her body almost convulsing as she attempted to quell her emotions. She wrapped her arms around my neck, burying her face into my chest.

I found the words she needed. "Let it out, kitten. I have you." I pulled her closer. "I love you."

Her cries were violent. The words she sobbed incoherent. I let her cry. I knew humans—women especially—needed the outlet. She had been living in fear for so long, and it was going to take her some time to feel safe. She didn't even feel it when I slipped from the car, still holding her, and settled us into the backseat. I stroked her back, murmured her name, and let her weep.

When her sobs quieted, I reached for the tissues, internally thanking my mother for putting them in the vehicle. I would never have thought of that. Bella sniffled into the white puffs, and shuddered out a long breath.

"What did you do to him?" she asked, barely audible.

Cupping her face, I looked into her eyes. She was pale and drawn, her eyes red from crying, and she looked exhausted. It reminded me of the first time I met her.

"All you have to know, is that he is gone. He will never hurt you again. You don't have to live in fear anymore, and you never have to run again."

She wrapped her hands around my wrists. "You won't tell me?"

"I don't want you to think of me that way. I did what I had to do to make you safe."

"Do you hate me for it?"

I pressed my mouth to hers, tasting the salt of her tears. "Never. Hate is never a word I will associate with you, Bella. I would do it again tomorrow, next week, next year, if that is what it takes." I tightened my hold on her cheeks. "Without remorse. Do you understand me? It's part of me, part of who I am." I sighed in acceptance. "And for the first time, I'm grateful for that part. I have the ability to keep you safe and protect you—always. Nothing will ever harm you, Bella. I won't allow it."

"I was so scared for you."

"Tell me, kitten," I demanded quietly, her concern touching me. "I don't understand."

"No matter what you said, I was worried something would happen to you, you'd be hurt, and it would be my fault. The thought of losing you was too overwhelming even to think clearly. And you were gone for so long."

I didn't know how to tell her it felt as if I was only gone a few minutes, when the truth was I had let the monster take control and lost track of time. I had been shocked when I realized I had tortured Phil for two hours. If my father hadn't shown up, I might still be doing so, even if he was dead. I would have ripped him apart with my bare hands, not stopping until he was in shreds.

"I had a lot to say," I lied smoothly. "I made sure he heard everything he had to account for."

She shut her eyes. She knew I was lying, and I hoped she would let it go. I couldn't tell her what I had done. She would never be able to live with the images my words would plant in her head. "Okay," she agreed. "I won't ask any more questions." Her eyes filled with tears again. "I'm so happy you're safe."

I held her tighter. "We both are, kitten."

She nestled closer, and I let her relax. "Do you want me to pitch the tent?"

"No."

"I can put the seats down and we can stay in here." I indicated the moon roof. "We can lay and look at the stars if you can't sleep."

She gazed up at me, her dark eyes glittering in the muted light. "I just want you to hold me."

Tenderness, only she could bring forth in me, filled my chest. "I can do that. My shirt is wet, though."

She pulled back and I tore it over my head, tossing it in the back. I resettled and pulled her to me, the heat of her body seeping into my skin. With her wrapped around me in the dark, the tension eased away. This is what I did it for. Her.

Bella gradually relaxed with me, the long shudders from her weeping eased, and her body molded to mine. She idly traced her fingers on my chest, the sensation light in the dimness. I shifted, keeping her close, sliding my hand under her shirt and pressing into the soft, warm skin of her back. She touched her mouth to my skin, the touches gentle and sweet.

Like a long, slow wave, the air around us shifted. Our touches turned from tenderness to need. Passion and desire pulsated between us. She lifted her head, our gazes locked, and I tugged her to my mouth, kissing her.

There was no frenzy, no tearing of clothes or earth shattering orgasms. Instead, I felt the intense need simply to be joined with her, to claim her in a way I never had until now. I kissed her body as I helped her remove her pants and shirt. I guided her hips as she sank onto my cock, sheathing me deep within her. We moved languidly, our mouths rarely apart, our hands clasped. I let her ride me and bring us both to a climax that seemed endless, and life-affirming. For the first time, I shed everything else and became the man Bella loved. The human she saw. I let down my guard, held her close and murmured the love I felt for her. How she completed me.

It was the joining of our two souls, who were lost, and now found. It was what we needed. I allowed her to erase the darkness in my soul, and she let my love lift her beyond her fears.

After, she slept in my arms, finally peaceful and at ease. Her mind was at rest, the fear gone, and she dreamed only of soft images. My mind was at peace, my body sated. Both the monster and human were content—a rare occurrence.

I pulled a blanket from the back, wrapping it around her.

I held her close, letting her rest.

I stared up at the stars, thinking of the future, knowing for the first time, I wouldn't be facing it alone.

See you next week. Thank you for reading.