The Secret Word Of The Day Is...
By: I'm Not Wearing Any Pants
Aww, yeah, here we go! We made it! It's happening! IT'S HAPPENING!
THE SECRET WORD OF THE DAY IS...
The Sewer King scowled and scowled and scowled some more, watching his stupid children fail at every opportunity to bring him stolen goods for the sake of the plot.
"I WANT MY FUCKING PRETTIES! YOU PIECES OF SHIT CAN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT EVEN THOUGH YOU'VE BEEN HIGHLY TRAINED! THAT'S RIGHT, YOU STAND THERE AND LOOK SHEEPISH! I LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE LOOK HUMILIATED AND AFRAID IN FRONT OF ME! NOW SUCK MY COCK! Oh no, wait, wait, HOLD UP! Sorry, force of habit." He shrugged.
The children cowered. Some vomited and cried harder.
"Now it's time for turkey," said the Sewer King as he moved over to the table. It was empty. They didn't get any food. "OH NO, ZERO, ZERO, ZERO FOODS! Z-Z-ZERO! Y-Y-Y-YOU ARE DISTRESSING ME!"
Some alligators showed up and soothed his distress.
"Yes, my pretties are hungry as well. "I'm going to feed these naughty children to them! IF YOU DON'T GET BACK OUT THERE AND GET ME MORE PRETTIES!"
He scowled so hard, it sent a wave of pure evil stupidity at them, knocking them down. They all got up and ran to the surface world to try and steal valuables for their king.
An alligator jumped onto the table and began eating the turkey. The table was crushed beneath its weight.
"SCOWL!" shrieked the Sewer King. "SCOWL, SCOWL! NO, KITTY, THAT'S MY POT PIE!"
He ran over and grabbed the turkey but the alligator did a death roll and flung him across the room. It hissed and snapped its jaws at him, ripping his pants and exposing his undies. He gasped and blushed. A few seconds later, all the kids came back so they could giggle at him for having his underwear exposed. Right. This isn't creepy as all shit and highly suspect in addition to being amazingly OOC on top of it. Nope.
OBVIOUS UNDERWEAR FETISH IS OBVIOUS AND AN EXTREMELY RECURRING TRAIT!
Balloons and confetti fell everywhere and a giant swing band with dancers and acrobats came out and celebrated the return of the boxer shorts obsession that is the single most defining and hilariously disturbing trait of this Suethor.
Also I can't even begin to read this sentence properly because it's so awkward. So for the sake of humor, I'm going to write that the Sewer King tried to hide the hole in his pants by picking up some baby alligators and holding them over his ass.
"THIS ISN'T FUNNY! THIS IS STUPID!" he screamed. "FADE OUT ALREADY! FADE OUT, I SAW! D-D-D-DISTRESSSSSSSSSSS! DISTRESSSSSSSSSSS!" He began to sob. In his underwear.
THE END