ANGEL POV

I'm really happy that James and I are friends now, but what I'm not happy about is how tour is starting soon. I felt like Logan would probably forget about me, and find some other girl like James found me. And that scared me… that scared me a lot.

We all went to the mall and hung out together, went out to eat, went to the movies a lot that past week before the tour, and I really enjoyed being with them. I knew I got to go to the first show and stay with them for a few days… but my nerves about Logan leaving started to really get the best of me.

The day before the tour started, everybody relaxed around the house. I sat in Logan and I's room and thought about everything. Carlos came in, obviously Logan sent him in here to see if I was alright "Hey best friend" Carlos sat down on the bed next to me "are you alright?" I nodded slowly and remained silent. He climbed up on the bed and laid next to me putting his arms around me tight. "Now, I know that a lie" I buried my face in his chest and held onto my best friend. He was one of the only people in this house I was really comfortable with seeing me so down. He really understood me when things got hard.

As much as I didn't want to believe he didn't or wouldn't understand what was wrong... He knew the moment I looked up at him with tears in my eyes. "I just…" and pulled me back into his embrace tight and shook his head "no sweetie, I know what you're going to say and I'm going to tell you.. " He looked down at me, "Logan won't find somebody else, so don't worry. He loves you. He loves you so much." I could feel the tears forming in my eyes. I had no reason to cry, but I was. I breathed in deep and held on to Carlos tighter. He rubbed my back and we laid there in silence for about 10 minutes.

I finally decided to try and talk; I pulled back from him embrace and looked up at him "Carlos... I don't want him to go… There are SO many other girls out there. He'll find somebody else... somebody a lot better than me" I sat up and looked at Carlos. He shook his head "If you broke up with him over this… he'll go crazy, Angel. Don't do something stupid." I sighed and got up going to the living room where Kendall and Logan were playing video games.

I sat between them and Logan put and arm around me pulling me close so he could still use the controller. He kissed my head not taking his eyes off the TV. I put my head against his side and stretched my legs out over Kendall's on the couch. I closed my eyes and drifted to sleep for what seemed a second.

In reality it was a half hour. Logan shook me gently "sweetie get up we're going to go out to eat" and kissed my cheek. I sat up and stretched. When I finally stood up Logan wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tightly. I felt so safe in his arms… I smiled a bit and hugged him back. He kisses my temple and whispered "I love you baby" in my ear. I smiled a little "Ya... Love ya too" He looked down at me quickly and I could tell it was the 'What the fuck is wrong with you... That's not how you usually say it' look. I just smiled a bit then pulled away and put my shoes on.

I looked over at Logan waiting by the door, while he looked at Carlos; He just shrugged then grabbed the keys. We all jumped into the car and went to a restraunt down town. I sat next to Carlos and logan sat on the other side of me. Kendall and James across from us - We looked at the menus and I chose just to get a dr. pepper and some salad. The boys ordered stakes and what not. Then when the food came ate like they haven't in months. Or maybe even years…

I remained silent basically that whole time we were out. Logan could tell something was up. He kept trying to grab my hand and I'd pull it away and just play with the straw in my cup. I looked over at him and would smile once in a while. On the way home I sat in back with James and Carlos. Logan put his arm back and rubbed my leg. I gave up on trying to get him to not touch me. I wasn't even sure why I felt disgusted by it tonight. I usually loved being cuddled up next to him, I loved everything about it. I loved the way he'd rub my leg, or how when we held hands he'd slide his thumb back and forth on the back of my hand. I loved when we was touching me. But tonight was really different… really different.

We go back to the house and I ran inside and went into my old room. I sat on my bed pulling my shoes off. Logan came in and stood against the door frame.

LOGAN POV

Something was up. I couldn't put my finger on it. She never seemed so distant before. I stared at her and she stood up, "What's wrong?" I whispered then watched her shake her head. "No, Angel… there is something wrong. You wouldn't let me touch you at all you said 'love ya" did… did I do something wrong?" She remained quiet and I just stared at her "whatever it is… can we please fix it tonight… I leave in the morning…. we leave in the morning." She shook her head again and whispered "I'm not going tomorrow Logan." then looked up at me. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?" I managed to choke out. She sighed and sat on the bed "I don't want to do this Logan, find somebody else… I don't deserve you. You'll find another girl on tour, I promise." I stood there confused I could feel my eyes start to sting as I heard her say those words I needed her there tomorrow… I needed her in general. She was my rock.

"Why would I do that… you're my girlfriend. I love you." And she just sat there... not saying a single thing. "ANGEL FUCKING CHRIST TALK TO ME" I basically yelled at her and she shook her head once more "Logan I'm done... I can't do this... Please go." She stood up and walked towards me slightly pushing me out. Once I was out enough for her to close the door she closed and locked it. I felt a sharp pain in my chest and pounded on the door. She needed me I knew she did. She needed me as much as I needed her. She was sick. She didn't tell anybody but me about her heart problems… she didn't tell anybody but me about her self harming… well besides Carlos. "Angel please open the door" I could hear her sobbing, I needed to get in there and hold her. I didn't understand why she was doing this to me.

I stood there begging her to open for 15 minutes before sliding myself down the door onto the floor, and then I lost it. I started shaking and crying. I hit my head against the door "P-p-please d-don-don't d-do this" I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think I wasn't even sure on what I saying. "I ne-need you a-answer me please." Anything could be happening in that room right now. She could still be crying, she could be sleeping, she could be cutting herself. Anything could be happening. Anything. I rocked back and forth repeating that I needed her over and over.

This was our first fight… I never wanted to fight with her. This hurt. In such a short time I let myself completely let my guard down and fall for this girl. She had me wrapped around her finger. And I wasn't afraid to admit it. She became my world. My life depended on sleeping next to her every night, making sure she didn't hurt, making sure she remained MY happy girlfriend. She was perfect, everything about her. I lived to lay in bed an listen to her breathe, the way she flinched in her sleep when she dreamt and grabbed onto me. The way I would look in her eyes when she woke up, and how green they would be… This wasn't what out last night before I left for tour was supposed to be like. This wasn't it at all.

I laid in front of her door and fell asleep. I was awakened at 6:00 when Carlos went by running to grab stuff. I sat up and looked at her door trying to open it once more… It was still locked. I sighed and put my head against it. I walked into my room grabbing my bad. I went into my closet and grabbed one of my shirts, a pillow from my bed, and a piece of paper. I wrote a quick note to her, telling her I loved her, and I wish she would let me talk to her. I also told her to call me. And I really wish she was coming with us.

I placed the 3 items in front of the door, and then put my hand against it whispering "I love you Angel…" then grabbed my bags and walked out of the house without my soul mate. Before boarding the plane I sent her a quick text " I love you, and I'm sorry for whatever I did to make you think like this. I wish you were coming with me to NYC. I'd love you to be at the show tomorrow night… but I understand if not. There's some stuff in front of your door. I love you Angel. My Angel" Then turned my phone off, and tucked it into my carry on. Off to NYC we went… and I was miserable.

If nobody reviews.. I'll probably take a while to update again. I like having motivation to do this story.

I'm kind of proud of this chapter.

Anything you guys would like to see happen?