AN: thanks for the reviews and thanks to bluebaby for betaing this chapter.

Power consists in one's capacity to link his will with the purpose of others,

to lead by reason and a gift of cooperation.

Woodrow Wilson

10. To be or not to be.

The shower cleaned me of the day's happenings. I sighed under the warm spry of water, it seemed impossible to imagine that only yesterday I was engaged to be married to a vampire and today I was dating a werewolf.

Jacob... my heart squeezed in pain at how much I put him through. I was feeling really guilty because he had forgiven me. I knew that I wouldn't have forgiven myself if I had been him. Or would I? Isn't real love meant to overcome every difficulty that life threw its way? Hadn't I forgiven Edward for walking all over my heart?

Edward... my first love. I was really worried about him. Would he really get over my loss? Aro was certain that he would sacrifice himself for my humanity, but after my betrayal, I wasn't sure about anything anymore.

Well, one thing I was sure of; now that I had laid out all my secrets to Jacob and he had accepted me I was definitely sure that I would stick with my choice. No matter what, I was Jacob's now. The thought warmed my heart. I was shook out of my reverie when I heard a knock at the door.

"Bells, I called Charlie and told him you'd be staying the night. I brought you a towel and some clothes. May I come in?"

I smiled softly at his requests, he was so attentive and he always respected me. These were the little things I would have missed the most about him. "Sure Jacob, come on in."

The door opened slightly and I saw his hand putting everything on the toilet's closed lid. "Here they are Bells. I'll wait for you in my room take your time." The door closed again.

I got out of the shower and surveyed my new clothes. They were Jacob's; a small t-shirt and a pair of shorts. He had probably worn them before his change.

A few minutes later I left the bathroom and entered his bedroom. Jake was sitting on his chair with an arm resting on his desk. He looked handsome just wearing his cut-off jeans. When he saw me he smiled and then stood up. "I'm going for a shower too. Make yourself at home." Passing near me he kissed my forehead and then closed the door behind him.

I eyed the bed and tiredness assailed me; I could lay down while I waited for him. I put my head on his pillow and Jacob's scent was the last thing I remembered before sleep claimed me.

...

I woke up with a start, and I realized that I was sweating heavily. I took in the position I was in, sprawled over Jacob with his arm on my waist keeping me locked tightly against him. When I looked up I saw that he was sleeping soundly and snoring lightly. I smiled at that. I've never thought how nice it was to watch him sleeping, breathing and hearing his heart beating along with mine.

When I tried to move his arm tightened more. He slurred his words with his eyes still closed. "Sleep Bells, it's too early..."

I caressed his chest softly and he opened one of his eyes. "I suggest you keep your hands to yourself or I won't be responsible for my actions." Then he suggestively raised an eyebrow.

I was sure my cheeks couldn't get any redder; and then boldly, surprising even myself, I kept caressing his chest. After a moment I bent my head down and kissed him where his heart was beating faster than before. I took a breath and by the time I exhaled I found myself on my back with Jacob hovering over me. "Bells... I had warned you." he whispered gruffly. "You shouldn't have done that."

I bit my lip and he growled playfully. I felt the vibration of his growl all over my body. Warmth started to spread from my stomach to every bit of my body. He slowly inched closer to me and then when I couldn't take the waiting anymore he placed his soft lips on mine. Slowly he bit my lower lip and I gasped. His tongue took that opportunity to slide into my mouth, the intensity of the moment took my breath away.

When I opened my eyes I met the dark and intense gaze of Jacob. "You know Bells, we haven't even gone out on a first date, and yet here we are in my bed kissing."

I laughed. "So much for starting from the beginning huh?"

He grinned back at me. "My dad is right, you really are attempting at my virtue."

I slapped him, though I knew he wouldn't even feel it. "Shut up Jake and kiss me."

"Your wish is my command Bells." He said and went back to kiss me.

Surprisingly he kept his hands firmly on my waist. Though part of me was glad that he wasn't rushing, my wanton side was complaining, wishing he would touch me.

Jake came up for air and after a moment shook his head. "You'll be the death of me Bells."

He stood up then. "I'm starving; care to keep me company while I eat something?"

I was a bit startled by his quick recover after our make-out session; my body was still humming with lust and desire for him.

He passed a hand through his hair, and I knew he was tense. "What is it? Is it about your talk with Sam?"

Jacob nodded. "Let's talk in the kitchen, okay?"

"Okay." I replied softly. I wondered what had him so upset.

...

In the kitchen I started to assemble a few sandwiches for Jacob, knowing his appetite would not be appeased by a measly meal.

Jacob had both his elbows lying on the table. His head was resting on his hands and he was fixated on me and the food with a hungry look. I didn't know what he desired most between the two. I giggled.

"What's so funny honey?" He asked smiling softly at me.

"Just wondering what you wanted most between me and the food." I replied. I was surprised at the ease in which I confided in him. With Edward it had always been such a torment to share my feelings and thoughts.

Jacob grinned. "That's easy, you!" and then his stomach growled. He massaged it. "Well maybe just not right now..."

I laughed and I realized that I couldn't remember when I had been so happy. I whispered softly. "You make me so happy Jake..."

His eyes softened. "You do too. It does still seem like a dream to me. I'm scared to wake up and find that this was all a dream; that you were never here."

"Well, you aren't dreaming. I'm here and I'm real. Here it is, enjoy your meal." I winked while serving him the sandwiches. His hand shot out and I found myself sitting in his lap. With one hand he was keeping me in place and with the other he was eating his food. "Hey mister, let me go!"

While chewing he shook his head. "Come on Bells, I don't see what the problem is. Am I not the bestest boyfriend you ever have had?"

My smile wavered a moment, but I caught myself in time. "Of course you are." I gulped; I refused to think about him right now.

"It's okay Bells..." He said softly, and when I looked at him with a puzzled expression he went on. "It's okay if sometimes you think about Edward... he has been your everything for a long time. I don't expect that you magically forget about him. I would worry if you did..."

I looked down at his hand on my stomach and put both of mine on his. "How did you know that I was...?" I didn't need to finish; Jacob was really good at reading me.

"You get this weird look on your face; it's a mix between love and despair. You had that look the day you came with the bikes...and other times too..." He said somberly.

I took a deep breath. "I'm sorry Jacob; you know that I love you very much. I chose you and I'm a thousand percent sure. But you're right, it won't be easy for me to forget him... I guess he will always be my first love... I want you to know that you mean more to me than he does. I would choose you over him anytime..."

His hold tightened and I felt his nose in my hair. He took a deep sniff and then I felt him relax. "I believe you Bells..."

We heard the door open, and saw Quil and Embry run into the kitchen and then freeze at seeing me in Jacob's arms.

"Whoa!" said Quil grinning. "Are we interrupting something again?"

Embry snickered and Jacob growled. "Quit it Quil!"

Quil laughed and then my boyfriend's best friends sat at the table with us. Embry looked at me and then at Jacob. "So have you told her?"

I stiffened. "Told me what?"

Jacob neared my ear. "Relax Bells..." I felt goose bumps all over my skin at his proximity and for a moment I forgot to breathe. "And breathe..." He chuckled.

I exhaled and noticed that Quil and Embry were smirking. I glared at them which made them burst out laughing. "You should have seen your face Bella! Whipped!" Quil teased me.

I bit my lip but then I felt a laugh bubble. "You might be right Quil. Isn't Jakey a lucky guy?" I said trying to look seductive.

Quil gulped and I burst out laughing, and soon I was joined by Embry and Jacob. "You should have seen yours Quilly."

After a moment we all sobered up and Jacob started to speak."There have been problems within the pack since after the newborns battle. Sam wanted the treaty tightly reinstated, but I disagreed. The Cullen's had helped us, fought with us and some of them were ready to give their lives for ours. Me and Sam were constantly fighting and his stand against our relationship was the proverbial last drop."

Embry nodded. "You have to know Bella that Jacob's orders in a way are easy for us to follow. Sam chose Jared as a second in command, but Jared is not the predestined Alpha. So sometimes me, Quil and Seth find it difficult to obey Jared. That has pissed Sam off greatly."

Quil added. "Once Sam had offered Jacob the Alpha position; but I agreed with Jake that he was too young and inexperienced to handle that kind of commitment. Though now, we discussed it and think that Jacob should become the Alpha. Sam doesn't want to give up because he thinks that Jacob is not fit to lead."

Jacob sighed. "I don't want to fight against Sam for the pack, but it is my right to be Alpha and my blood is pushing me to claim it. I told Sam that we could share the power for some time and then he would hand it to me in due time… but he refused."

Seth burst into the kitchen then. "Hey, am I on time or have you already spilled the beans?"

Jacob growled. "Shut up and sit down Seth."

Seth grinned but obeyed swiftly. I had felt something strange when Jacob had spoken. Like some energy was flowing out of him. And I gasped. "You're the new Alpha!"

Seth, Quil and Embry looked at me with shocked expressions. Jacob took my chin and turned my face to look at him. "How did you figure it out?"