Sorry it took me so long to get the next chapter up. I'v been dealing with a few things. Helping clean up the yeard and getting the poll up and running, pluse my backs been in mass pain what with this damn pincked nerve.
Shitty nights of sleep turned to sleepless nights. Happy didn't know that though. I would go to my room and stay there with my lights off, and be as quiet as I could be until Happy was in bed. Then when the cost was clear I would make my way back out into the living room and watch T.V. or surf the internet while listening to music. Just before he would wake up I would get back to my room. I even quit doing school work completely after a few days. I just couldn't concentrate enough to do it. Every time I closed my eyes all I saw was the blood and the bodies of the people I killed. Sure it was self-defense, but Hale was trying to bring up charges on me. I would have to go to court and testify; tell everyone my story and hope that they would leave me alone. There would be no retribution for this considering the people all responsible were dead. Or at least the main people were dead. We didn't know if anyone else was responsible or not.
I didn't care to leave my room, but Happy made sure that I got out every so often. Though half the time it was only to eat something and take a quick shower. Sometimes I would watch T.V with him but most of the time I was in my room in my PJ's sitting in the dark listening to music. I was losing weight. I knew that everyone cared and was worried about me. They came to check on me; try to convince me to come out of my room, but after refusing so many times they figured that I just need some time by myself. That was until about half a month passed.
Happy barged into my room once during the third week of myself seclusion. "Look I get that this is tarring you up, but this shit; not eating, sleeping all day is starting to worry everyone. Hell at this point I don't give a shit about your school work, but you need to get your ass up and out of this room, and you need to start eating something. I don't care what it is but your starting to look like a skeleton." He told me sternly turning to leave. I stopped him. "Chocolate cheery Garcia ice cream." I whispered while looking at him through my bangs. He turned back to me. "Ice cream?" He said more like a question with one eyebrow raised. Then he nodded his head. "I can do that." He pointed a finger at me. "But I want you sitting out on that couch when I get back understood? You can't keep living your life in this room." He finished while he walked away.
Just like he said I was sitting on the couch when he got back with several quarts of chocolate cheery Garcia ice cream. So for the past three days I've been hanging around the club house or watching T.V and eating ice cream. It felt good to be out of my room and around the club again. But I still wasn't sleeping; which Happy still didn't know. Until one night I was sitting on t couch eating the last of my ice cream when I heard his foot steeps coming down the hall. "What the hell are you doing up this late at night?" he asked quietly. "Couldn't sleep." I paused. "Again." I finished taking another bite of ice cream from the container I was holding. "What do you mean again Shase?" He took a seat next to me. I looked at him with my dead eyes; I was so fucking tiered. "I haven't been able to sleep since I killed those guys…and before that I wasn't sleeping well because I knew something was going to happen." I told him. "There anything I can do?" I shook my head no and held out the half empty container of ice cream. "What some?" I asked while watching the T.V. marathon Sons of Gun's. I felt him take the spoon from me and take the carton from me. After a few minutes he handed it back to me and I ate a few bites. When it was gone Happy kicked out the foot rest and lounged back. I felt my eyes begin to clouded over, my head felt heavy and I started to yawn. The next thing I know I'm leaning against Happy blinking every so often.
No one ever remembers falling asleep, but they always remember waking up. It surprised me when I woke up that; one I had fallen asleep at all and two that Happy and I were still on the couch with the T.V. on. Happy was awake talking on his cell phone to someone. The funny thing was that I was still leaning ageist him and I had a blanket covering me. "Sorry man. Shase passed out on the couch leanin against me; didn't want to wake her up. Told me last night that she hasn't slept since the shooting." He paused to listen. "We'll be there sometime today, when she's finally awake and shit." He finished and snapped the phone shut. He looked down at me. "Finally awake I see." I sat up and rubbed my eyes. "Sorry 'bout that." I told him. "Long as you got some sleep I don't care." He said and stood up. "Why don't you go take a shower and get ready. We're goin ta be heading out to the club house in a little bit." When I stud up the room spun and I had to sit down for a second. Luckily Happy had already walked out of the room, and when I got back up the room didn't spin.
I got out of the shower not too long after I got all cleaned up and dressed. I found Happy in the kitchen making something to eat. "You want anything to eat?" He asked. My stomach rumbled then and the smell of French toast and scrambled eggs made my mouth water. "Sure." I said taking a seat at the table. Happy turned to look at me slightly surprised then turned back to the stove. After a few minutes Happy set a plate in front of me and took his seat with his own plate. "It's good to see you eating something other than ice cream kid. Everyone was getting really worried about you. Seeing you lose weight like that, everyone is gana be stuffing you with food, get some meat back on your bones." "Sorry. I didn't mean to scare everyone. I think I'll be okay now." And that was the truth; something finally just clicked. It wasn't my fault what happened; they left me with no choice. I would either be dead or hurt horribly. I felt bad that I had made everyone worry.
When we were done eating we took off to the club house. It felt awesome to be on a motorcycle again. Almost everyone was outside the club house waiting for use and when we finally got there they were happy to see that I was doing better. "Hay baby girl 'bout time you got out of your funk." Jax said ruffling my hair. "Yea yea, I already told Happy I was sorry." I said smiling while shoving Jax's hand off my head; only to be bombarded by everyone else messing around with me. "Stop." I laughed out loud. After a few seconds everyone quit and went back to club business. As they were in "church" I sat at the bar counter and talked with Gemma about how things were going. "How you doin baby girl? You seem happier." "I'm doing fine. It just took some time for it to finally click you know." I told her and paused for a second before continuing. "But uh this court thing has me worried. I head Happy on his cell phone one night saying Stahl was going to be involved. I don't know what I should say or not say. Or what if I go away for it, or if they try taking me away from you all and put me in a foster program. Saying that living with you all is endangering me or something. OR WHAT IF THEY DO BOTH; YOU KNOW, PUT ME IN JAIL OR WHATEVER AND PUT ME UP FOR ADOPTIN. NO ONE WILL WANT TO ADOPED ME THEN. WHAT WOULD I…" I started to ramble when Gemma finally stopped me. "Baby girl calm down. Nothing like that's going to happen. We won't let it happen." "But how do you know. How do you stop something like that?" I asked.
Just then the doors to the "Church" opened and everyone filed out. "What's all this commotion about? We could hear you in the other room?" Clay asked walking up and holding Gemma. "Nothing, Shase's just freaking out about the whole court testimony. She thinks that they're going to throw her in jail and put her up for adoption. Take her away from us." Gemma told them. "I'm fine, just worried." I said standing up to go outside and get some air, but the room started to spin again and the edges of my sight stared to go black. I felt my legs start to give out; my legs finally gave out on me and my ears filed with the sound of rushing blood blocking out all other sounds. I felt hands pull me up and take me somewhere before I felt like we were moving; probably in a car.
When I came around I was in the hospital with everyone sitting around the room. "Jesus kid you scared the shit out of us." Jax said. I looked around the room and found that not everyone was there. Happy was nowhere to be seen. "Where's Happy?" "He's taking to the doctors." Gemma said. "How's your head feel? " Chips asked. "Ug, don't remind me." I whined. Happy walked in then with a scowl on his face. "Fucking doctors." He mumbled. "What?" I asked wondering why he seemed so pissed. "Asshole thinks you've been doing this on purpose. Something about anorexia and shit." "BUT I'M NOT." I practically yelled. "We know that baby girl. You have to calm down." Gemma said. A knock stopped our conversation. Happy answered the door only to have Agent Stahl push him back. "What are you doing here?" Gemma growled. "I had to make sure the perpetrator was doing alright. Besides I need to talk to her." She said. "No." Happy said. "Oh well I don't think you really have a choice." She said holding up a piece of paper. Happy snatched it from her and sighed. "Fine but I'm staying.' "I think it would be best if I talk to her alone." Everyone glared at her unmoving. "It's okay guys." I told them and watched as they reluctantly made their way out. When the door was finally closed Stahl smiled wickedly. "So…I've heard the doctors talking. They say that you've become unstable. What I'm wondering is if you weren't already unstable before the shooting." She sneered. "What are you talking about?" I played dumb. I was waiting for the right moment. "Here's what I think happened. You went for a ride in Gemma's car; met up with those five guys to "hang out". When they didn't give you what you wanted…you snapped; shot them all. When you were caught you played out an elaborate story clamming that they kidnapped you and tried to rape you. Does that sound about right?" She tried to make me angry so that I would become angry. In my anger I'd loss my composure and yell out things that could be used against me. I shook my head. "I…I…no no that's not what happened." I whimpered tears forming at the corners of my eyes. "It's your fault five men are dead. They had children that loved them. And now their fatherless. Are you proud of what you did?" she taunted. I grabbed fist full of my hair shacking my head harder. "No NO IT'S NOT MY FAILT. IT'S NOT MAY FALT. THEY ATACKED ME I HAD NO CHOICE. I HAD NO CHOICE." I started to yell. "IT IS YOUR FALT. AND NOW YOUR GOING TO GO TO JAIL. THEIR GOING TO TAKE YOU AWAY FROM YOUR SO CALLED FAMILY. YOU'RE A MURDER." "NO NO. IT'S NOT MY FALT. NOT MY FAILT. I DIDN'T WANT TO, THEY MADE ME. THEY THRETIND ME. IT JUST HAPPENED SO FAST. NOT MY FALT. IT'S NOT; IT'S NOT." It the back ground I heard the monitors going off and the rushing of footsteps. The door flow open and a doctor and two nurses came in. "Miss you'll have to leave." " IT'S NOT MY FALT, IT'S NOT MY FALT. I HAD NO CHOICE." I yelled. I watched as both nurses shoved Agent Stahl out the door. The doctor was trying to calm me down enough to shot something into my IV tube, but I kept shoving him away. "I WANT MY FAMILY." I yelled. The doctor huffed but walked out with the two nurses.
Not too long later my family came rushing back in. I whipped my eyes and looked at their worried faces. I smiled wickedly and winked the monitors where still going off but it's not like I was really freaking out. They looked at me strangely before I spoke. "What, didn't think I'd let that bitch really fuck with me did you?" My smile grow. A look of realization dawn on their faces and they laughed hysterically with me. "Damn baby girl you polled one over on Stahl. A doctor out in the hall called her a heartless bitch and told her she wasn't allowed back here." Jax said. My plain had worked. With that show of how distraught she had made me, everyone else would be sympathetic. A shitty way to be looked at, but a sure way to have everyone on my side when it came to court.