Entry 10

Make lunch / Bring money for food.

There. I have written it down. This is supposed to increase the chance of someone remembering things. I am not sure why it does, but I will do it nonetheless. I do not like being hungry. I also do not like having left both the card with my funds on it, and my phone, in the pockets of one of my Tokiwidai Middle School uniforms. I do not see why the school insisted that I wear its uniform, rather than the Tokiwidai Middle School uniforms I already possess. It is very awkward.

'Caring for myself' is hard and inconvenient. We have decided that we do not like it.

Other Sisters are eating right now. I tried to tap into their sensory feed, but that just left me feeling more hungry. We have established that this is not beneficial. As a result, I am trying to distract myself by updating the diary. I am sitting in the girls' toilets, writing, to escape from the sight and smell of other people eating. It is not as bad as the sensory feed from another Sister, but it still makes the hunger worse.

Make lunch / Bring money for food. As a first order approximation, by writing it twice it is likely that now I am more likely to remember to bring money, or make food.

Hunger is not something we have died of before. The Accelerator was too impatient and-or bored to leave us to die from deprivation. Considering how I feel now, it is clear that he was more merciful than we had previously believed. I may perish from this. My Sisters inform me that I am not acting logically and that we do not perish from such an allegedly short period without eating.

They are terrible sisters. It will be at least four whole hours before I get back to my flat, and then I will need to go out and purchase food. This is intolerable.

I have tried sending desperate messages to -10032 and my other Sisters in Academy City to bring me food, but they do not consider it high priority. And they have put contact requests from me at a lower mental priority. I am not 'nagging', for all their factually incorrect accusations.

They are indeed terrible sisters. When my dessicated corpse is found, they will be sorry.

I have encountered a phrase which describes the way I feel about this. It is called 'existential terror'. Some of it did not make much sense, like the question of how mankind finds a purpose for itself in life. But it is reassuring to find that other human beings find the prospect of cessation scary.

If I encountered the Accelerator when walking down the street and he killed me, as he does, it would be different from how -1 to -10131 died.

I should endeavour to not encounter the Accelerator. I was not planning to do so, but now I will avoid it even more. I do not like the idea that I have memories which would be lost to us.

This morning, we had classes on mathematics and literature. The mathematics was trivial, so I completed the questions in class and then linked into the sensory feed of the film -17210 was watching. We did not understand why they needed giant robots. Surely Level Fives would have been more effective. In addition, if the main characters had communicated in a more efficient way, it would have been a lot easier to tell that the male lead and the female lead had romantic feelings for each other. That was a plot twist we did not anticipate. When they kissed just before the last fight, it had not been foreshadowed in any way. They had said nothing about their feelings before that point.

We consider this a sign of bad writing. It makes it very hard for us to study normal human behaviour.

In the literature class, I was issued my books and asked to read the set text in my spare time, to catch up with the rest of the class. I sat next to the blond boy who asked me if I was the sister of the Original. His name is Yokouchi Toru, and he talks a lot. However, the teacher was very remiss in failing to caution him, and he did not listen to my warnings that we were not meant to be talking in class.

He observed that I was interesting, and that there was something about me that he couldn't quite get a grasp on. He also informed me that he lived across the hall from us, with two other boys, and so we would probably see more of each other. He noted that there was loud music coming from our flat, and suggested that I might want to invite him to the party.

I informed him that no, there had not been a party; that was Abe Eiko, and that Aino Sumiko had shouted at her about that.

He agreed that Aino Sumiko is a loud sort, and then raised his eyebrows and smiled. I do not know what he meant by that. It is not amusing how she shouts when you are trying to get to sleep. I polled the Network and we are not sure. Hence, the rational explanation is to assume that he is trying to get us to lower my guard so he can take advantage of us for his own goals. Fortunately, we are not vulnerable to such things. Moreover, I have protection quite apart from my esper powers. I may have forgotten lunch, but I did not forget my F2000-R. This is called 'having your priorities straight'. Even if you are very hungry.

After class was over, Aino Sumiko pulled me by the hand into the girls' toilets and told me fairly loudly that Yokouchi Toru is not to be trusted, that he might seem charming but he's too forward, and that I should not let him take advantage of me. She added also that he is only interested in himself, and that he is a 'stupid fat pig who is stupid and useless and can't stop looking at other girls'.

Perhaps she is better inclined to us than we suspected. We already held the belief that he had ill intentions towards us, but to have her caution us, despite the fact that that would raise our suspicions that we were in danger and so put any plans of her at risk, suggests that she may not hold ill-intent towards us. That is admirable. We have already observed that she does not like being a Level One. To warn us in this way is an altruistic act, as it will make it harder for her to gain level by killing us.

Of course, I will still remain wary around her. We cannot discount the fact that she may be attempting a sophisticated ploy to raise our suspicions against everyone save her. It was suspicious how she turned red when I asked her how she knew all this.

This afternoon we have power tests in the gym. This will be a moment of peril. While weakened from hunger, I may be susceptible to attack from a Level Two or even a cunning Level One. At least the rest of us had the excuse of being killed by a Level Five. I will go down as the Network member with the most humiliating death.

I have just received a message from -10032. She says that she will get the bus over here and throw some sandwiches over the school fence if it will stop my 'whining'. I feel she is being too light-hearted about the real and present danger of my death by starvation, but I will accede to her demands if it will get me food.

It is not raining any more, so the day has improved notably.