AN: Next weeks update might be late, I'm going to visit my sister. I will try and be on time though! I'm also trying to stay up to date with my other fics and cross-posting to AO3 and writing for DCBB. So yeah. Those are my crappy excuses. Review responses are at the bottom.

Chapter 10

A week later during lunch, Dean was staring at the empty space at the table where Sam's name was inscribed gloomily. He knew Sam could take care of himself, and his reasons for leaving, but it still hurt.

"I miss him," he said abruptly to no one in particular. Jo, seated next to him, placed a hand over Dean's right comfortingly.

"I know."

"Do you think he'll ever come back?" Dean asked morosely. Jo rolled her eyes at Castiel, who moved off the wall from where he was leaning.

"Of course he will, Dean!" Jo sighed. "He's your brother. He loves you."

Castiel placed a hand on Dean's left shoulder, and Dean's skin burned at the contact.

"Sam's fine, Dean, and he will return to you. He's been looking up to you his whole life, he needs to go and see the world for himself."

Dean leaned back into the comforting touch. "Yeah, I know. I'm just…blagh. I'm gonna go for a ride." He stood and walked out the Hall, Castiel's hand falling uselessly to his side as he watched him go. He and Jo looked at one another.

"We're going with him, aren't we?" Jo said. Castiel nodded, and she gave a small sigh before standing up.

"I thought as much."

They walked out the Hall, and went to find Dean.

A week had passed, and Sam had settled in at Castle Stanford rather well. There was an enormous library he was able to lose himself in, and Brady, the father of Jessica, was content to let him stay for as long as he pleased. Sam also suspected that he was trying to set up him and Jessica, and Sam wasn't sure he even minded. Jessica – "call me Jess, Sam!" – was beautiful, sweet and smart, and Sam was determinedly ignoring her resemblance to Jo. They spent their days perusing the library, and eating and talking in the sunshine. Every time Sam mentioned repaying them for their hospitality, Brady was horrified. He insisted that it was their duty to repay Sam for killing the werewolf that had plagued the for so long, and Sam's guilt at finding out that it had been a lovely young woman named Madison from the surrounding village was tempered by Jessica's smile.

Maybe this will do as a substitute for…home.

The same day that Dean was bemoaning his younger brother's absence down south, Sam was leading Jessica by the hand through the trees around Stanford, laughing.

"Hey, Jess?" he said, stopping to face her.

"Yeah?"

"You're really beautiful, you know that?" Sam spoke seriously, and cupped her face in his enormous hand. She smiled.

"Thank you, Sam. You aren't so bad yourself," Jess said, and Sam gently brought her face up so that their lips met. They both smiled into the kiss, Sam with a tinge of sadness. He pulled back quickly.

"This is okay, right?" he asked uncertainly. Jess snorted.

"Of course it is, Sam."

They kissed once more, and Sam was able to forget.

Dean took off out the stables on Impala, Castiel and Jo close behind. They rode for a good half hour, until they were out of the city limits and deep within a forest. Jo had had the presence of mind to bring some apples with them, and they alighted in a clearing. They allowed their horses to wander, and Dean flopped down onto the soft grass, Castiel sitting next to him.

"I'm going to walk," Jo said, and she moved between the trees until she was out of sight. Dean allowed his hand to link with Castiel's.

"I like this. This is nice," he said in a sober tone, and Castiel understood.

This is what I could have had.

Castiel shifted so that Dean was able to put his arm around him and take his hand with his other one, and they stared up at the canopy of leaves above them.

"When I was a kid, I always dreamed…..I always just wanted to be able to hunt and ride across the land, you know? Just to be free and do what I love." Dean's voice was sombre, and Castiel squeezed his hand.

"I wish you could have had that life, Dean."

"Eh, it ain't so bad," Dean looked at where Castiel was tucked into his side. "I got you, don't I?"

"You will always have me, Dean," came the quiet reply. Jo, watching through the trees, saw their mouths meet, and Dean gave a small sigh of contentment as his eyes fluttered shut. She leaned against a tree and closed her eyes.

"I wish it could always be like this," Dean whispered against Castiel's mouth. "Do you ever think we could have that?"

"I wish we could, Dean."

Dean stopped his wishful thoughts, and they continued to kiss, celebrating their stolen moment for all it was worth. In another clearing, Jo stared into a pool of water, and thought about Sam.

Sam came home a year later.

He rode into the forecourt, alone, shoulders hunched against the torrential rain that was pouring down. Dean burst out the heavy wooden doors and beamed.

"Sammy! You're back!" he hugged his younger brother, and realised Sam's despondency. "Sam?"

"I…..I need to talk to you."

Once they were seated by the roaring fire in Dean's room, in dry clothes, Sam began to tell his story.

He told them about the dragon he had slain in Wales, the vampire nest he had eradicated in Cornwall. Finally, he told them about the werewolf girl he had killed, and about Jess. Jo's jaw tightened when he told them about how after nine months of courtship, they had gotten married. Almost two months later, Sam had left her.

"I didn't…..I don't love her, Dean. I felt so damn guilty. I explained to her, and she cried. So much. I'm a terrible person," Sam was crying now, and his hair hung to his shoulders. Dean let his brother cry and pulled him in so that his head rested on Dean's shoulder.

"Sammy, I spent your whole life watching out for you, and the past three years worrying about you. You are not a bad person, and you never will be. You can't help not loving her. We'll sort this out, okay?"

Sam shrugged. "Okay."

He allowed Dean and Jo to guide him to bed, leaning heavily on the pair of them in exhaustion. Dean looked at his unconscious form helplessly.

"What do we do?"

Jo folded her arms.

"We let him decide what he wants." And without another word, she turned and walked to her bedroom. Dean, resigning himself to sleeping alone once more, went to his bedroom, his mind heavy with thoughts of his younger brother, Jo, the kingdom, and Castiel.

He was pleasantly surprised to find Castiel waiting for him, a glass of whiskey in each hand.

"Thanks, Cas." Dean drained the glass in a single gulp. "What do I do?"

Castiel took the glass from him and set it on the table. "You allow your brother to choose his own course of action. You know how he feels about Jo, and Jessica was a comfort for him. He knew that it wasn't enough, so he left her. You cannot order him to return to her, nor can you order him to stay."

"You weren't even in the room when we were talking about it! How the hell do you know?"

Castiel smirked. "I have my ways."

Dean was unable to bear it anymore, and he pulled Castiel in for a kiss. Castiel melted against him instantly, and they stood there for an incalculable amount of time, hands easily finding their way into the spots that were well accustomed.

"I'm never going to get tired of this," Dean whispered.

"Of the sneaking around or the kissing?"

Dean pulled away and sat on his bed.

"Don't say it like that. You of all people should get what I mean, how I feel!"

"Dean…"

"No! I'm so….I've been King three years and it's sucked the entire time! I'm married to a girl who is in love with my younger brother and who I think of as a sister, my brother is married to a girl he never wants to see again because he's in love with my wife, I haven't had real sex since I was 16, and I'm in love with my best friend! The only thing that's going right is the country, which is a fucking miracle because I have no idea what I'm doing!"

Castiel knelt in front of him.

"Dean, I didn't mean it like that. I am angry, yes. But not at you. Never at you. I am angry about your situation, I am angry about your needless pain. I am also incredibly jealous of the fact that I am unable to have you for myself," he admitted, lowering his gaze. "I'm in love with you, Dean, and I never meant to be. But seeing you go through this every day, and knowing I can never fully have you? It hurts, Dean."

"Cas," Dean breathed brokenly, and he pulled Castiel in for a searing kiss before pulling back slightly.

"Make love to me, Castiel. Just this once, let's forget."

AN: Next chapter there will be smut, okay? I'm too tired to write crap right now sorry but yeah they finally gonna do the butt thing.

MariMagda - Jo and Dean make me sad for many reasons ugh. And thanks! :D Nah Jess is someone else who was with Lancelot :3 close though! It'll become obvious next chapter anyway.

Reviews and stuff are welcome all the time!