Hey, i'm back :D- Wooh lol.

This chap starts of a bit slow, but i promise it gets goood (well i think so lol)! Hope you enjoy it!

Reviews most welcome!

And thank you SOOO much everyone who has reviewed and given me some really good advice!!!!

Noorah xxx

Bella POV:

This time I was sitting- I was amused at my apparent constant laziness. I sat cross-legged, my arms folded in my lap just staring at the ceiling above me- pondering what was going on in my life and where it was heading. Francis had gone out; he wanted me to have some time alone. His sadness at having to leave was astounding. He had minced around at the door like a young school boy hoping to be allowed more time before bed time. I felt terrible; this was his home after all. But the truth is, I really needed this time to think. And it was vital that whilst doing so I had absolutely no distractions. No guilt hanging in the air. No tension taunting my stomach. No more hungry, love filled glances- definitely no more of those.

I pondered and circled around different theories, what to do- where to go... everything. I thought about them all at once. It was like having one of those telecom places in my head- I was doing so much at once. Time was so slow now I had changed. It felt like years, but it had only been minutes. What was I doing...?

My emotional outburst was less than five minutes ago, and yet it felt decades away. I cringed at the thought; I was definitely not making this easier for either of us. Time passed listlessly awaiting some kind of upcoming resolution. I laughed at the idea. Might take a while. I was clueless. I was following obediently as my brain raced forward, trying to order and take control of my jumbled life.

I listened intently to the sound of Francis as he silently went around his business a far distance from the hut. He seemed distracted, preoccupied; I was pleased. I needed to think. I knew what I had to do, but the truth was- I was petrified of the idea. I was to be completely alone. No one to guide me, help me- suppress me if I got out of hand. It would be me, myself and I. Complete and utter independence... loneliness. But whatever direction I analysed it from; I saw that it was the only way possible. I would not be able to live with myself otherwise. I could never love again- I would just be leading him on. It wasn't right. Not in the slightest. This was the right thing to do. He thought I was his love reincarnated, it wasn't right to play along.

I had to leave- and I would do so soon. But first I had to help this kind, kind man be at peace. How would I do that? I knew what I would do with myself once i left, but what would Francis do? I bit my lip- he couldn't go back to those mad vampires, the Volturi. I shuddered. No, I could not let him go back.

I would strive to return to humanity, I would take control of my life and return back to Forks: to Charlie, Renee, Jacob- everyone and anyone who cared. God only knows what they must think happened... guilt crippled me; I had not been fair to them. Anyone. I had been selfish in my grief. Things had to change. I would grieve alone, and try and be normal for them. I only had to live for them. And then after that, who knows.

That would be my incentive to go on. I couldn't live without my love, but I would try. I would not lead Francis on, knowing I just don't love him, and never will. It was cruel. I feared how he would take it. He was a broken man on the mend, and I would shatter him- possibly to a point where he would not be able to put himself back together. It reminded me of humpty dumpty. Instead of him falling- I was to push him. My teeth pierced my lips deeper and I waited for that sharp metallic tang of blood. It never came. Only skin.

I had to think of a way. I was only hurting him by being here- but I would destroy him by leaving suddenly. If he loved Sibel- I mean... me... anything like I loved Edward. I was certain. I would destroy him.

I signed and stared at the flawlessly muddy brown ceiling, analysing each cell interlocked into a giant jigsaw of delicate beauty. I was surrounded by such splendour. I was trying to distract myself from the scolding sensation emanating from my dry, sizzling throat. It was only at certain intervals it began to beat ferociously. I could ignore it- but it was growing increasingly difficult. It was calling for satiation. And it needed to be soon. I was so thirsty! Francis had promised to take me on my first hunting adventure. Maybe there I would tell him I had to leave. I had to think of a way to leave without hurting him. He felt like the grandpa I never had- I couldn't bear to hurt him.

Butterflies fluttered in my stomach at the thought of hurting an animal- killing it. I gulped loudly... how was I going to do it? Francis had explained the logistics of it- it seemed wholly logical. I would not hurt the poor animal. It would be too fast for him to feel a thing. Nevertheless... I would be taking its life. Could I do it? My throat hissed at the thought. It was that... or risk killing a human.

I felt dreadful, really terrible. I was in agony at the thought. But I would do anything to reduce the risk of killing another human being. I just kept on picturing me losing control around Renee or Charlie... I shuddered at the thought, and fear's cold grip took hold. Never! I was terrified, but I could not, would not allow such a risk. But needs must be. I pushed my fear aside. It would be no different from eating a burger... Right. Right?

I stood up swiftly as I felt Francis's presence hovering patiently by the open door way. He was waiting to leave, and to go on the hunt. I was so lucky Francis was a vegetarian- the nickname my old family used. I smiled and swiftly pushed them away as I came across Francis. It was so cool- blood had no call for him. After all this time, he had become immune- he didn't need blood, but it was habit. I wish it could be so for me. Maybe over time, blood would become unnecessary.

A nervous smile spread across my face as I saw Francis's glorious grin. His eyes bore deep into mine, as he took in my facial expression- smiling deeply into my eyes. He knew how I felt; my reluctance to leave. It was kind of annoying- yikes. I take that back, it was freaky. Now I knew how everyone must have felt about Edward reading their minds. Creepy...

Ok, Bella, you can do this. Deep breaths... I scanned around me- and I was startled as I took in the- immensely charming splendour, of the forest surrounding me.

WOW.

Nature flourished around Francis's little hut, which seemed to have become part of the intensely picturesque natural beauty. Trees surrounded us and interlocked viciously as they fought for the scarce light which pierced shrilly through their large, over bushed branches. The trees soared high above me. And it took me less than a millisecond to estimate some of their lengths; 90 metres was the one besides me! It was staggering. Never had I been besides such uniqueness. It was wholly new. Their ages varied from the naive small trees which sprang lithely out of the ground- to the soaring trees which stretched upwardly yearning to reach the sky. It was bizarre, so many new things!

The ground was packed tight under the trees, trip worthy veins which dug and pushed up the compact dirt. Worming and burrowing its way in to dangerous pathways and mazes. I could hear animals for miles, the birds as they flew freely through the arms of the over stretched trees. To absorbed in their freedom, to detect my meek presence standing agape watching them soar gloriously. Their arms spread resplendently and their feathers of immensely varied length and colours spread eagerly. Reds, purples, oranges, greens, browns... and what was that colour?

My new eyes detected and absorbed every single detail on everything. I could see it all in a startling new light. I had thought before I had seen it all- wow, I was seriously wrong. It was astounding. I didn't even recognise these colours! I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't exist on the colour spectrum. Everything was so exotic. Nothing was straight, nothing plain- everything was unique, proud and beautiful.

I watched as obliviously everything carried on without acknowledging us. A strange looking mouse with the most remarkable face crawled out of a small burrowed hole under a large root to gaze warily around it, before darting out into another hole in the root beside it. A smile spread across my face. So this was how it was to be from now on? I could live with it... A high pitched bell sound escaped my parched throat and became one with the mysterious forest. I could become part of this nature. A wild girl! Jane- without her Tarzan. I could give myself over to the wild, become like snow white. Might be a nice change. My heart hiccuped and my throat sizzled. I signed, who was I kidding?

"Francis, I don't think I can take this anymore." I frowned into his swimming pool blue eyes.

"Then let us hunt. S-Isabella, do not over think it. It will do no one any good. Quick and painless. Ok my love"

Another sigh escaped my dry throat- this was going to be a lot harder then I had first anticipated. But I was ready.

Francis began to run, and I swiftly followed. Like the birds we filtered through the trees. As I ran, I waited for the dizzying effect that had previously always overcome me, and the merged surroundings. It never came; it wasn't anything like that. I could have been walking for the clearness around me. I felt the warmth of the sun hit me, and warm my pale skin as the beams of sun reached my frozen skin and brought it alive. It was sensational- shivers ran through me, making me want to run faster, and faster! The wind gushed past me as I surged forward, twirling and caressing my hair. I had never enjoyed running such as this, it was startling.

My two left feet had finally become compatible. I leaped over a root blocking my path. I followed my instincts and gave way to the surging thirst in me. It took over. But I was ready with a tight leash for when it got out of hand. I kept Renee's picture in my head close by, her cheerful face smiling at me. A reminder: I had to be careful.

I could hear Francis close behind me, his casual breaths as he soared trying to keep up. He was right on my heels... I wonder if I could run faster... I pushed on, pushing my new legs to the limit. The eagerness to explore my new found body took over and I surged forward. My legs soared over branches, my legs splitting in the air gracefully. It felt weirdly enough as if I was dancing. Everything was so slow, sensual; it felt as if time had paused. It was just me, dancing through the forests. I could focus on my every movement. I hated ballet as a child: anything which involved using muscles in synchronization. Nevertheless as I moved I felt everything- I felt so alive. I could feel my grace, as my muscles contracted and relaxed coordinately- following obediently the requests of my body.

I knew I was nothing compared to anyone. But it just felt so good! The sun, the surroundings, the freedom! It had been so long since I had been this happy! This free from myself... my heartbreak. I was blindly blissful, I danced through the woods. Only focused on my every movement- twirl, twist, jump... I was lost in my own world, absorbed in the absurdly magnificent surrounding before me. I imagined Edward to be there with me, close by. That he still loved me. I was completely at peace. It felt as if I was in a nature program. I was lost in the wild- lost in myself. My senses were overwhelmed as they took in all around me. I felt like the birds, who soared carelessly though the sky. My nose picked up every smell; I had barely enough time to register all as I passed through the mysterious forest. It felt like I was flying. I was leaping, no longer running. I was doing splits my ballet teacher would have been proud of.

But slowly my peace was shattering; I hung on to it tightly whilst my senses began to absorb other things. Something had changed in the atmosphere. The air grew taunt...The small creatures littering the floor scattered away in fear. I could feel the danger... I could smell it, taste it. It seeped into every pore of my body. Francis? Francis- I listened carefully, and in the distance I heard a boom as something fell heavily to the ground. There were more loud crashing sounds- as the violence increased. I could hear low growls and grunts as someone struggled... Francis! Oh, no- no.

I spun around ready to run back and help my kind friend. But I had not been paying enough attention to what was going on around me. I was to caught up in helping Francis and my dancing to realise it was not Francis who had been following me close by all this time. But someone else...

I had been blind. The smell was so different- of course it wasn't Francis! But I was too late. I was far from Francis now- surrounded by trees. My hair stood on their ends as I felt my visitor crouching low behind me. I felt so silly now. My heart hiccuped. I was terrified to see this person's face. Would it be James or Laurent back to hunt me? Or Victoria? Was Francis ok? Would he suffer because of me? Fear gripped me, and I held on to logic's. It didn't smell like a female. There was a strong repulsive musky smell emanating from whoever it was. So maybe Laurent or James had come back from the dead. Great. I signed and turned to see the face of my stalker. Whomever it was, I knew they weren't here to play.