(10) Tomato
Splat.
Red. Red everywhere.
A battlefield.
Splat.
Why do I keep getting hit? Why why why whywhywhy –
Splat.
Whose team am I on? Are there teams? What's a team?
Splat.
Was I on Danna's team? Is that her name? Danna—
Splat.
Who's who's who's Danna? No… It's Manna… Right, Manna, is she the red-head or the one that talks a lot or the one that's yelling at me or, no, everyone's yelling at me, why is everyone yelling at me, can't they tell this is war and-
Splat.
I don't even like potatoes, why are they chucking potatoes
Splat.
I mean tomatoes not potatoes but you know what they say, tomato, potato, whatever –
Splat.
Dear Goddess it's raining now oh goddess the blood is rain the rain is blood why is everything red why why
Splat.
I want to throw these I want to throw them at everyone I want to kill I want to kill everyone I will kill everyone Die Die Die Die Die Die
Splat.
How many times do I have to be hit before I die? Why do they keep
Splat.
I'm dead. Let me die. Stop, just stop, just
Splat.
STOP IT STOP IT
Splat.
STOPPITI'MAFUGGIN'KILLYOUGUYSSTOPPPP
Splat.
Dammit Rick just because you told me red looked good on me the other day does not give you the permission to Holy crap that's a big pota- tomato I should duck how do you duck I need to duck but behind what oh I'll just duck behind him his suit's already red it won't matter to –
Splat.
Oh Goddess that was the mayor wasn't it the mayor just got pelted he saved my life though I love him I love him I will marry him and give him my kingdom for he hath saved the life of a fair maiden today oh thank you Mr. Mayor whose name I don't even remember thank you thank you thank you
Splat.
Down for the count.
…
…
…
… Splat.
I hate you Stu.