Chapter 10

TRIS

Finding a copy of the horrid newspaper article wasn't difficult. What was difficult was convincing myself to not strangle Tobias the very minute I walked inside that house. I growled with fury as I read it, every word like a drop of fuel to my rage. How dare the Erudite attack my father! And how dare Tobias hide something like this from me!

My face is red, and I'm sure that fumes are radiating from every inch of my body when I burst through the front door, because Tobias' eyes fix on mine, hard and careful. Unafraid, I storm toward where he sits. I pull the ungodly piece of paper out my pocket and I practically throw it at him.

"You knew about this?" I yell. "You knew about this and you just decided to not say anything to me?!"

Tobias' eyes open wide at the sight of the crumpled newspaper that's sprawled carelessly in front of him. He barely looks at it, yet he recognizes it. He lets out a breath and then he looks away from me.

"How could you keep something like this from me?" I yell at him again, forcing myself in his line of sight. "I shouldn't be hearing about this an entire week after the fact, when my own husband has known about it from the very beginning! Even Susan knows that and she's as green as a cucumber!"

Tobias' head immediately spins around and his eyes find mine again. Only this time, they're filled with something like resentment. Tobias stands to his feet, and with a scowl on his face he towers over me. "You can't demand that I comply with my duties as your husband when you obviously have no regard for your own as my wife," he says, lowly but angrily. His eyes are deep with thought, angry thought.

"Oh come on, Tobias!" I shriek, flinging my arms here and there. "I get that I'm not Abnegation wife of the year, but this is about my father! This isn't ammo for you to use in whatever little game you and Marcus are playing."

Tobias gives me an incredulous look. "I didn't not tell you because I wanted to get back at you. I didn't tell you because I knew it would upset you," he barks in his own defence.

I almost laugh at the idea. "So you're protecting me now?" I scoff and roll my eyes in disbelief. I run my hand over my hair, and this time I do laugh. It's a wry laugh, but only until the heat of my emotions brutally possesses me, warping it into a real laugh.

"Well excuse me for not always thinking about myself," Tobias says sardonically. "Unlike the person who seems to forget that that article wasn't just about her and her father."

"You cannot be serious!" I say, very frustrated but equally amused. "You do realize that this is your fault, right?! The Erudite would have never come after my father if it weren't for this stupid, bogus marriage!"

Tobias shakes his head in obvious frustration. "I'm done with this conversation," he says, although more to himself than to me.

"No, you're not!" I shout desperately, and I grab his arm when he tries to walk away. However ridiculous and sadistic his defence, I want to hear it. I want to know how he justifies everything that he and his father have ever done to me and my family. "Talk to me!" I continue to yell. "Tell me what's actually going on in that head of yours!"

Tobias looks down at where my hand clutches his arm and then back up at me. He doesn't pull away but I can feel his strong arm stiffen under my touch.

"You really want to know how I feel?!" He seethes darkly. "I'm getting sick of you!" he says, suddenly raising his voice. "You're not the only one who was forced into this marriage! And when I came, I came with the idea that we would both do our best to make this marriage work! But I have tried and tried and I'm done trying. I don't know where I got the ridiculous idea that you would at least try to feign some decency. But I was so wrong about you. You're nothing but a selfish brat!"

My hand falls away on its own at his declaration, suddenly reluctant to be in contact with him. "Oh please!" I scoff in disbelief while trying to bury how much his words actually hurt me. "If Marcus forced this on you it's because he was smart enough to know that you were too much of an imbecile to ever find a wife for yourself." I take a step closer to him, every inch of my body challenging him.

"Well as imbecilic as I may be, I have no doubt that anybody else in this entire city would have been a better choice than you," Tobias retorts, practically growling at me.

"So why didn't you choose a wife for yourself then, Tobias? Why didn't you marry Emily?" I scowl her name, my tone mocking them both. But even to myself, I can't deny the sharp pang of jealousy that I feel even at the very thought of her.

"That is none of your concern." Tobias' face suddenly hardens, and he stands straight and stiff, as if trying to frighten me off.

"Of course it's not," I say sarcastically. "I heard Marcus talking to you at the wedding. You think I'm stupid?" I take another step forward. "I know all about why you married me, Tobias. Because I will be beneficial in your ascension in society," I mock. "Don't you even dare try to and victimize yourself."

Tobias' eyes open wide. "You don't know what you're talking about," he says. He looks in control, but there's a hint of nervousness in his voice. His words slightly tremble on the way out.

"You're just like him," I almost whisper, leaning my face up closer to his. "All you both care about is power and control."

Challenging me, Tobias leans in closer. I can feel the heat and rage radiating from his body. "I'm nothing like him," he seethes at me through gritted teeth. He stands tall and commanding as he looks down on me, his eyes penetrating. But I don't flinch and I don't step back. I won't let him threaten me into submission.

"Oh, you're not?" I hiss back at him. "Then why did you marry me then? If not for your own benefit? What does Marcus have over you? How could he have possibly forced this on you?"

To my surprise, Tobias is the one who tears his eyes away first. He takes a small step back. "Marcus has always controlled my life," he says softly, lost in thought. "He…," he pauses. "He has his ways ok?!" Tobias' tone suddenly becomes hot again, defensive. His eyes, warm for only a short second, are now guarded and cold.

I'm about to retort, about to yell back, but something deep inside me stops me.

I recall the way Marcus had spoken to and about Tobias at dinner, the way Tobias cringes under his father's touch. I recall the way he recoils into a shell of quietness whenever his father speaks. I remember the strange scars that I had seen on his sides that flowed along the beautiful lines of muscle that curve around into his back. And then I remember the part of the newspaper article that accused Marcus of grotesquely mistreating his son.

I had dismissed it, thinking that the accusations were no more true than those made against my father. But the longer I stand there and think about it, the less untrue it seems. Until finally, in a frighteningly cold and sudden moment, I get the most horrid revelation.

"Tobias…," I begin weakly, simultaneously wanting to retreat and wanting to step closer to him. "Does he hurt you?" My right hand suddenly longs to caress his face but instead it becomes numb with frustration as it hangs limp at my side.

Tobias looks somewhere above my head.

"Tobias…," I say again, but he doesn't answer me, nor does he look at me. "I'm so sorry," I almost whimper. "I've been so horrible to you all this while because… I thought you were in on it." I stutter the words with obvious despair, shame, and regret. I almost sound pitiful.

Distraught, I stare up at him but Tobias just stands there and says nothing. My mouth hangs open, desperate to express how horrible I feel, but the words evade me. Everything that I can think to say sounds derisory. I can't even seem to bring myself to ask for his forgiveness, because deep down I know I don't deserve it.

"Please say something," I say as I feel the weight of my actions in my arms, in the pit of my stomach, deep down inside my chest, pulling me deeper into the ground.

But he doesn't. He says nothing at all. Not caring to look at me even once, Tobias simply turns and walks away, his foot seemingly heavy as he treads up the stairs. I feel my eyes become heavier and heavier with every step that he takes. My legs beg me to let them run to him in the same manner that my arms long to reach out to him and my mouth longs to scream his name. But instead, I stand limp and defeated, too penitent to do anything at all.

I suddenly feel weak when he arrives at the top of the stairs, my heart sinking too deep into my stomach when he turns the corner where I can no longer see him. And when he slams the bedroom door shut, the first teardrop falls.

A/N: And there's that argument some of you were waiting for! Sorry this chapter was shorter than most. I promise the next will not disappoint ;) A guest reviewer asked my most and least favourite Divergent ship. My most favourite by a long shot is FourTris. These two are simply perfect for each other. My least favourite is a tie between Peter and Tris and Four and Christina. I honestly cannot tell you which I hate more. They both make me sick lol Thanks again for all your support guys. Your reviews make my day as bright as a summer day :)