Hello guys! Hope you're all having a relaxing sunday! (it's raining here in Wales, as per usual)

I was a little skeptic writing this chapter, not sure what I think of it, can you please leave me a review and comment on it please?

Have a lovely day guys!

oxoxox

(CASEY POV)

It was six weeks after Gabby's attack when she was cleared to return to work and today, after weeks of moaning and bitching, she finally was.

"I've missed work so much! There's only so many movies you can watch and ice cream you can eat before you actually begin to miss the life of a PIC," she laughs, her feet propped up on the dash-board as she reads through the paperwork Shay had lovingly left her.

"Yeah," I smile, trying not to be distracted by her happiness, "It hasn't been the same without you."

"Awe," her lips pout and she whips fake tears from her eyes, jokingly, "Did little Matty miss me."

"Yes, I did," I smirk, "the showers weren't the same without you," nudging her arm slightly.

"OH!" Gabby gasps and then her eyebrows raise, "I'm sure you made up for it at home."

"Touche," I grin, and pull into a space in front of the House.

"So, who's this Roxanne chick?" Gabby asks, her eyes slightly curious as she collects up all her papers in the truck and slips on her shoes.

"She's your new paramedic candidate, she's been working beside Shay and Jade while you've been off."

Gabby rolls her eyes, "Great, puppy training again. How's she doing?"

"She seems pretty cool, she's a nice girl," I reply, and her eyebrow raises with a daring look in her eye, "Okay, let me rephrase... How does Shay thinks she's doing?"

"Well Shay's unsure. She said she thinks Roxanne can only handle herself sometimes, but she wants your opinion."

She nods her head sarcastically and climbs out of the truck, "Yeah, Shay would leave the dirty work for me."

"Dawson! You're alive!" Herrmann jokes as she rushes into the House, eager to see everyone even though she had been visiting most days after the pain had subsided. She heads over to him and kisses his cheek.

"I was just about to say that I'd missed you until that came out of your mouth," she teases with a smirk on her face wrapping her arms around a man she considered her brother.

"Yeah," he rasps, rolling his eyes, "We missed ya Dawson."

She makes her way around House hugging Mills, Otis, Mouch, Kelly, Capp, Chief and then Shay, each one smiling and telling her how much they had missed her.

"Awe girl, I missed you!" Shay sighs and hugs Gabby, rocking her slightly.

"I've missed you too Shay. Anything exciting happen while I was away?"

Shay smirks with a teasing look in her eyes, "Well you'll be glad to know that you missed another snake incident."

Gabby breathes a sigh of relief and holds her hand up to tell Shay to not elaborate anymore, "I do not want to know. I still have nightmares from the last one!"

Gabby moves over to Roxanne, the small blonde watching Gabby's interactions with everyone from the kitchen, "Hey, Roxanne right?"

She smiles wearily as Gabby shakes her hand, "Yeah, it's nice to meet you Dawson."

"Nice to meet you too. How are you finding Engine 51? They treating you right?"

(GABBY POV)

Roxanne was a small petite blonde, cute, pretty. She seemed quite shy too, but no doubt easy to get along with.

"Nice to meet you too. How are you finding Engine 51? They treating you right?" I smile softly, a joking tone in my voice to try to make her feel at ease with me.

Her blue eyes flicker behind me for a moment before returning to my own as she rocks on her heels, and when I take a sneaky look behind me Matt was standing there.

My brows burrow for a second but I think nothing of it, "Yeah, it's great here. Everyone's lovely," she replies with an inkling of hidden meaning in her voice, taking a bite of her apple.

"Good..." I get cut off by the alarm before I can say anything else.

"Ambulance 61, possible heart attack in Heath park."

As we rush out to the van I give Matt a quick peck on the lips, "Go get em'," he smirks as I almost skip to the van with excitement.

I'd missed this place.

"Well, that was easy," I say as Shay parks the van back in the garage, she smirks and rolls her head in my direction.

"We're starting you off slow Dawson, wouldn't want you straining yourself," she winks and I poke my tongue out at her.

I roll my eyes at her and then look at Roxanne who was off somewhere else, "You okay hun?"

I break her out of her trance and she looks at me slightly shocked, "Y-Yeah, I'm good."

I nod, deciding not to push it, "Okay."

When we clamber out of the van I find Antonio waiting for me with Matt, "Hey you, what you doing here?"

"Just checking up on my little sis," he smirks, hugging me, "No, really, why are you here?"

"Okay," he sighs, giving up, "I need you to do me a favour."

"You want me to babysit and yes I will Antonio," I say, seeing right through him, "You know, you're meant to be a cop, where's you're poker face?" I tease, nudging his arm with my own.

"Funny, I'll drop them off here tomorrow morning after your shift?"

"Sure, that's cool," he then hugs me, shakes Matt hand and leaves.

"So," Matt says, throwing his arm over my shoulder, "How will we entertain the little Dawson's?"

"We'll find something," I pat his chest and grin widely, "Diego's yours."

"Oh great, I'll be out by noon then," he smirks, remembering Diego's never-ending energy.

"You'll live."

"So how's the baby process coming along?" I ask Shay as we make our way to the kitchen, thankful to have a quiet minute alone with her.

She smiles, her face lighting up with happiness and excitement, "Great, absolutely great! We're just waiting until I'm in the window, and then we're headed to the clinic."

I throw my arms around her, "That's amazing! I'm so happy for you guys!"

"I just get butterflies in my stomach every time I think about it..."

"Hey," I nudge her, "Soon that'll be a baby. You're gonna be a great mom Shay," I reassure her, as along with her excitement she was nervous too.

"I can't wait Dawson! It's just so amazing, to be mom to this little bundle..." I listen to her cute ramblings as the smell of Peter Mills' cooking floods our nostrils.

"Mmm, that smells...great," I stutter as we enter the break room because I catch sight of Matt and Roxanne at the table with their heads tilted towards each other, laughing and joking, while Roxanne had her hand on his arm, stroking it softly.

Shay watches me as I gulp slowly with a sympathetic look in her eyes, "Hey, Peter Mills, whatcha cooking?" I call cheerfully, and move behind the counter avoiding Matt's gaze.

"My infamous lasagna, perfected to a T," he grins proudly, and continues making the garlic bread.

"Well, it smells great," I say, feeling Matt and Roxanne's stare on me, but she had thankfully moved her hand from Matt's arm, "I'll help?"

"Sure," Pete smiled and hands me some dough to roll out, I hear Matt's chair scratch along the floor and when I look up he was rounding the counter towards me.

He stands behind me, his chest pressed gently against my back and leans his head against my own, whispering in my ear, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, fine," I breathe softly, it was hard to stay mad at him when he was this close to me. And at that moment I felt like he only wanted me.

Maybe I saw it wrong? Maybe I saw what I most feared, rather than two people, friends, laughing and joking with each other?

"Gabby..." he warns, noticing that something was up and knowing that I often kept things bottled up.

"I'm fine, honestly Matt," reverting my eyes to the dough in front of me because they'd give me and my lie away.

"Okay," he sighs and rocks back on his heels before kissing my head and then moving in the direction of the garage.

I watch as he goes and don't fail to notice Roxanne following him a moment later.

Pete was just about to serve the wonderful smelling lasagna when the alarm sounded and distracted our grumbling stomachs.

"Truck 81, Squad 3, Ambulance 61, building fire."

And as we'd done a thousand times before, we all raced off to our respectable vehicles and drove away, hoping to save just one more life.

I was patching up a small head wound when Chief disturbed my concentration, "Dawson, we need you to go in with Mouch and Otis. The fire's secured in the west wing, the east is safe. Possible gunshot wound on the fourth floor on the east wing. Can you do it?" Chief asks tentatively, it wasn't often he sent a Paramedic into a burning building, but if he was, he was confident in doing so.

"I can do it Chief," I state confidently and grab my gear, before following Mouch and Otis into the building.

The floors were slightly cloudy from the smoke as we moved up, but Mouch said it was nothing to worry about.

"Just stay close Dawson, you'll be fine," Otis reassured as we make it to the fourth floor. The victim was laying in the middle of the corridor and large pool of blood surrounded him.

"Mouch, do you have the victim?" Chief's voice booms over the radio, interrupting my work on the gauze.

"Yes, Dawson's treating him now."

"You have to get her out now, fire's in the air vents. Move now!" Chief instructs, and his words can not be argued with.

"Shit, come on Dawson, time to move," Otis states and moves to pick up his legs.

"He's bleeding out too quickly, if we move him he'll die," I state and continue to pack gauze into his wound.

Mouch grabs at his arms and Otis at his feet, "We move now Dawson, Chiefs orders," Mouch says.

"Let me tape the gauze first Mouch," I snap and slap the tape on the gauze, fastening it in place. The room was getting thicker with smoke and I could feel the rising temperature.

"Mouch! Get out now, smokes gone black!" Chief screeched over the radio, and it was then that fear hit me.

Mouch and Otis grab the guys arms and legs and pull him towards the stairs, and the air vents above us and below us explodes, leaving a gap in the floor, separating me and guys. The heat in the room only intensifies.

"Dawson!"

I stare at the gaping hole, the flames licking along the floor and stood frozen, my feet planted to the floor and they refused to move. Fear twisted my stomach and I felt sick. Mouch and Otis stare on in horror.

"I'm going in! Let me go! Kelly let me go!" Matt's voice over the radio snaps me out of me trance and I stare at the guys, pleading for them to guide me through this.

"Dawson, jump! You have to jump!" I hear Mouch's voice instructing me, but no matter how hard I tried to concentrate the fiery hot room was distracting me. The smoke was suffocating, even with my mask on.

"Dawson, jump!"

I step back after hearing the pure fear in Mouch's voice, and run. I throw myself over the gaping hole and land sideways, just millimetres from the edge. I feel their hands pull me away from the flames.

I nod to them, a signal that I'm okay and a thank you, and we rush to the stairs taking them two at a time. Blood drops from the victims wound as we go.

"Mouch? Where are you? Mouch, do you copy?" Chief's fear was clear, even through the jagged sounds of the radio.

Mouch doesn't answer but I doubt he could if he wanted to, he just focus' on getting on closer and closer to the ground floor. We were on the third.

"Mouch, Otis, Dawson, do you hear me?"

Second floor.

"Where are you?!"

First floor.

"Damn it! Does anyone copy? Where are you? Someone talk to me!"

Ground floor.

We could the light through the smoke and we were headed for the door dragging each other along, three in and four out, alive.

"Chief, I see them!" I hear Herrmann calling and suddenly he and Cruz are at our sides, pulling us out of the building, out of reach of the flames.

I pull off my mask desperate for clean air, the fear had knocked the air out of me and I was panting for breath.

My knees give way under me and I force myself to sit on the curb before shaky hard arms throw themselves around me.

"Oh god Gabby, don't you ever do that to me again, you hear me? I thought... I thought. You could have died!"

My hands grasp at his cheeks and force his tearful eyes to look at me, "Look at me. I'm here, I'm here Matt."

His lips press against mine for a brief moment, before I hear the ambo whizz away with Shay, Roxanne, Mills and the victim inside.

"I'll have to catch a ride home with you," I smile softly, comforting his shaky body with my smoke-stained one.

(CASEY POV)

I find her in the bathroom bracing herself against the sink, the water running needlessly from the tap. She's staring at herself in the mirror, but her eyes are distant and remote and I know that she's not seeing herself in that mirror.

"Gabby?" I ask tentatively, stepping towards her frozen body. Her eyes move to look at me in the mirror before she uses the running water to scrub the smoke stains from her face and arms.

Her scrubbing of her skin is to intense to not cause any pain so I place my hand over hers to stop her, and her voice breaks, "Is that what it's like for you?"

"Yes," I answer simply, because she knew that was the answer anyway, "But it's my job Gabby, I'm trained for that."

She bites her lip, a clear sign of her nervousness and fear, "I saw that hole in the floor and I thought that was it. I was frozen, I couldn't move and yet I knew if I didn't I was gonna die. If it wasn't for the fear in Mouch's voice I doubt I would have moved. I heard you're voice over the radio and then I knew how it felt for you, how it feels when you hear me screaming at you to get out. To hear the Chief yell and lose himself to his fear, shouting at you to get out because the smokes gone black. I've been at enough scenes to learn that when the smoke has gone black you barely have minutes, but I made them stay so I could tape up his wound. I could have been responsible for their deaths Matt, how do you deal with that?"

I was unable to do anything but to pull her into my chest and wrap my arms around her so tightly that it was definitely hurting, the tears in my eyes stung from the hurt in her voice, "I'm responsible for their lives Gabby, and we're all trained to run into burning buildings and know that we may not come out. You're not. You're trained to do your job and that's what you did, and we do ours. Mouch and Otis shouldn't have given you that extra second, they should have grabbed your ass and ran. But they did and they got you out alive Gabby. We've all been in that situation and you can't let it get to you, you just have to thank you're lucky stars and move on because you know that building could have been the death of you but it wasn't. That fact that all three of you are here alive, is what matters the most."

"But I don't think it should be you going in next time, if needed..."

"No," she snaps and her eyes glare at me, "I'm PIC. I make the hard decisions so Shay doesn't have too, it's my call. She's getting ready to get pregnant Matt, I'm never going to put her in that situation. And what, I let Roxanne the candidate go in? I'm responsible for her, not the other way round."

"Okay, okay," I try to calm her by putting my hands on her shoulders, "Today was a mistake. We should have found the fire in the vent. But Chief rarely allows anyone but us into the building, so I can't see it happening for a while anyway, so there's no more need to dwell on this okay? Move on."

She nods, but her chest is still rising and falling too quickly for her to be calm so I take to distracting her while I'll help remove the smoke from her skin, "If it doesn't rain then maybe we can take the kids for a picnic in the park? I can play football with Diego and you can play with Natalia, and soon enough I'll wear Diego out enough for him to sleep the rest of day."

Gabby slowly smiles and the tension in her body is relaxed slightly, her mind filling with thoughts of her niece and nephew rather than of the fire, "If you can be so lucky..."

I give Gabby some space for the rest of the shift while also watching her carefully to make sure she was okay.

"Hey, Peter Mills, let me help you with finishing dinner," she grins as she wanders back into the break room, her skin now clear of all traces of smoke and dust.

"Grab a spoon Dawson," Mills exclaims, throwing a spoon to Gabby which she catches with one hand.

A few minutes later Otis and Mouch enter with Herrmann at their side and she moves to hug them both at the same time, "I am so so sorry you guys and from the bottom of my heart do I thank you for what you did okay? I owe you guys so much."

Mouch huffs in his typical smooth voice and his arm wraps around her waist, "You owe us nothing Dawson, that's our job."

Otis smiles, "Just try to not do it again okay? Mouch was close to a heart attack back there."

Mouch grumbles at his comment and hisses, "Why I oughta'..."

"Calm down now boys, feel the love," Gabby grins as she returns to helping Mills dish out the dinner.

Roxanne then came and sat by me on the table and we started talking about our favourite films and music, and realised that we both had similar taste.

"You like X-Men?" I asked, shocked to find someone in the House who actually liked the series. Everyone else declared to hate it.

She smiles widely playing a lock of her blonde hair, "Oh, yeah I love it. One of the best film series ever!"

"It is right?! No one but you agrees in this House!"

"Really, not even Gabby?" Roxanne smiles softly and shake my head.

"No, Gabby doesn't really like X-Men."

"Awe," she frowns, "Maybe you and I can watch it sometime?"