Disclaimer: JUCHKO: Only when pigs fly. Wolf-chan (the person I based Inuka off of): -picks up Ino and throws her out a window- JUCHKO: -uh...Technically that's considered falling, not flying, and Ino means boar, not pig. Wolf-chan: Oh well…it was worth a try…
Chapter 10: Why…Itachi's View
Itachi watched as Sakura looked up at him, her eyes questioning. Now was the time to tell her, "It's for the best that they are dead." She opened her mouth, but he knew she would ask 'why' yet again, so he continued, "I originally planned to only kill that old woman after getting some information from her. But before I left to kill her, Leader told me something."
Itachi let that sentence hang in the air as he watched Sakura's face go from angry, to sad, to confused. He continued, "Leader knows many things, and he knew that the Hoshi's were planning to do something to you that neither of us would like." The confusion became even deeper set in Sakura's eyes, but she didn't interrupt.
"I questioned a number of Hoshi's and found that what Leader had told me was true. The Hoshi's were planning to make you into 'The Pillar' of their society. In simple terms, it means that they planned to force you to stay in their village and never leave so that they could force you to do whatever it was that The Pillar did. If you want to know what that was, ask your cousins."
Itachi studied Sakura's face again, and saw that she was trying to hide the horror she felt at the thought of what he'd told her. But he had more to tell her…that was only the tip of the iceberg, "The Pillar of their society, who had to be a Time Walker, had to live under the weight of many restrictions. As I said, they could never leave the village. They also could never talk to non-Hoshi's." He could see the fear of such a life spread like wildfire behind Sakura's eyes, but there was one other thing he had to tell her. Something he knew she would hate even more.
"There's one more thing…The Pillar always had an arranged marriage to another Time Walker. That old woman and the other elders had already arranged for you to marry your second cousin, whose first wife had just recently died bearing his eighth child." Itachi was somewhat glad to see the disgust behind Sakura's now large eyes.
"As you can see…you wouldn't have liked that whatsoever." He paused and smirked before he added, "I didn't like it either, so I killed them." Sakura didn't say anything, she just stared at him.
On her face, he read that though she now understood why she would have hated it, she was still confused as to why he had killed them. She obviously wasn't seeing his reason for not wanting that life for her, even though he had painted such a clear picture for her. She was most likely still trying to understand the earlier part of the conversation, and had therefore not yet absorbed everything he'd said.
Itachi let his smirk reappear; he knew how to help her see what was right before her eyes. The fact that she was already staring up at him made it easy for him to bend down and kiss her. She was so lost in her confusion, that she didn't even notice he was kissing her at first. When she did, here eyes widened and her face turned bright red. She didn't lean into the kiss, but she didn't push away, either. That would have to be good enough for now.
Itachi pulled back, satisfied with their progress. At least this time she hadn't fought him…it was a start. He watched, amused, as Sakura quickly looked down at her lap, trying in vain to hide her blush. He hoped that now she understood why he'd had to kill her clan.
Once the majority of her blush was gone, she asked, without looking back up, "You killed them because of me then?" Her head sunk lower as she said almost to herself, "It's my fault their dead…it's all my fault."
He didn't like the tone of her voice; she was blaming herself for something he'd done. That wouldn't do. "No," he said sternly, making her head jerk up, "I killed them because they were going to take you from me." He decided not to add that he also hadn't wanted her to be unhappy because of them too. That would only make her blame herself more.
She was now staring up at him with sad eyes as she said, "But it's still my fault, isn't it? It's all because of me. If not for me, they'd still be alive. If not for me…" She bent her head again as she continued, "…if not for me…the Uchiha's would still be alive too." He felt her begin to tremble as she said, "It's all my fault! If I'd never messed with time, and you'd never met me, they'd all be alive. If-"
Itachi interrupted harshly, "Enough." Sakura quickly closed her mouth, looking almost afraid. Itachi mentally sighed, he hadn't meant to scare her, but he wasn't good at this kind of thing. He'd have to try to be a bit more gentle. "Stop blaming yourself." he began, making his voice less harsh and more stern, "You didn't know what you were doing back then. Besides, it was me, not you, who decided to kill them…so how could you be to blame for my actions?"
He had meant for that to be a rhetorical question, but apparently Sakura didn't know that because she answered, "Because if you'd never met me, you'd have never killed your clan or mine! If you'd never met m-" Itachi cut her off.
"We'll probably never know what would have happened if I hadn't met you, because I did meet you. That's all there is to it, so stop trying to complicate it by asking 'what if?'. For all we know, I could have decided to kill them anyways, so stop it."
She looked down at her shaking hands, looking deep in thought, and for a moment he thought she'd actually let it rest. But then her voice quivered as she spoke, "But it is my fault…maybe he knew that somehow…maybe that's why he…" She trailed off and he felt her begin to tremble slightly again, though she tried to hide it.
He used one hand to lift her face up, and on her face he saw the look he remembered from all those years ago. The look that meant she was thinking about the boy who had hurt her. Back then he'd had no clue who the person had been, but now he had a guess. After all, he now knew who had been on her Gennin team as well as the other clues she'd dropped about his identity back in the past.
If he was right, he had made a terrible mistake when he'd let him live. "By him…you are referring to my foolish little brother, are you not?" Sakura froze, and that was all the answer he needed. She had told him long ago that her first love had betrayed 'everyone' to become a rouge ninja, effectively breaking her heart.
Now he wished he hadn't let Sasuke live. At the time, he hadn't seen a reason to kill him. He had hated everyone else so strongly, but Sasuke was only an annoyance, and something had told him that killing him wouldn't be a good thing. He hadn't known at the time that the reason he'd refrained from killing Sasuke was because of the fact that, even though he didn't remember it, Sakura had always been so obsessed about making Sasuke happy.
So he'd give the vague excuse of having wanted to test his powers. After all, at the time, even he hadn't known why he'd hated his family so much, just that he did. He also hadn't known how he'd found out that his supposed best friend, Shisui Uchiha, had been assigned to keep watch over him, or why he was so angry at Shisui for it. But now he did. Now he remembered everything.
He had hated Shisui not only because he had betrayed him by telling his father things that he had sworn to secrecy about, but also because of something else. If Shisui had only been doing what he'd been ordered to do, Itachi may have forgiven him. But he was doing it of his own free will because…and this really irked him…because Shisui had wanted Sakura for himself.
That had been too much for him. He had felt a deep hatred for his 'best friend' for betraying him, and a deeper hatred for his father and the rest of his family for wanting to make him marry someone he didn't love. When he'd first found out, he'd been able to reason with himself that he and Sakura wouldn't let them get between them. But then Sakura had left, and he no longer had anything to hold him back from the hatred that had been raging in his heart.
The first thing he had done was decide to kill his 'best friend' who had betrayed him. Then he had achieved his Mangekyo Sharingan. He decided to learn more about how to use his new ability before he did anything else. He didn't know why he hated his family so greatly, but he hated them and he wanted them dead. When he couldn't wait any longer, he killed them too. It was simple as that.
He had acted on pure instinct, since he couldn't remember so many things. He had always thought his instincts had never failed him and never would, but now he knew his instincts had failed him when it had come to his own brother. He should have killed him too, but he hadn't, and his brother had gone on to hurt Sakura. It was an unforgivable act…
Until now he'd merely been annoyed at his brothers existence the way one gets annoyed at a fly that constantly pesters you. He had just ignored his foolish brother, knowing Sasuke could never become a threat to him. He had thought that if Sasuke wanted to ruin his own life, he was welcome to it. But he hadn't known about Sakura then, so he hadn't known that letting his little brother ruin his own life would have direct negative effects on his beloved Sakura. Maybe it was about time to bring out the flyswatter and get rid of the pest.
Sakura's question broke through his thoughts, "How did you know that?" Itachi didn't say anything. He had told her he wouldn't waste words, and answering a question that she already knew the answer to would be a waste. He waited, and finally she sighed, "Fine…don't tell me…I think I know anyways…" Itachi smirked again, but she didn't see it because she was once again looking at her hands. She seemed to be trying to come up with her next question.
Suddenly her head shot up and she asked quickly, "Wait! How do you even remember me? She said everyone would forget about me!"
He let a chuckle escape him at how she had only just remembered that. She was now staring at him, but he didn't mind. "The mark…" He answered, his face blank again, "When I touched it, I remembered…" Sakura's face got serious and her eyes clouded over as if she were remembering something.
Finally she said, her eyes still clouded, "You remember the solar eclipse…It gave me many visions…and one of them was right after I had used the scroll…I saw you touch the mark…I saw other things too…I saw you kill great-grandmother…I saw Konoha being under attack…I saw-"
Suddenly Sakura's hand's flew to her mouth and her eyes widened in shock at whatever it was she remembered. Then she said, astonishment evident in her voice, "I saw Sasuke and Kabuto go to kidnap my uncle…and…I remember now…Sasuke also touched the mark!"
Sakura looked up at him, and he saw both longing for and fear of that being the case in her eyes. "So, do you think he remembers too?" She asked, but all he could do was shrug. He had a bad feeling that Sasuke really did now remember, but he hoped he was wrong.
Itachi watched as Sakura's hand moved to hold the necklace he'd given her. Her eyes were clouded over again, and she mumbled so quietly he almost didn't hear it, "In the vision he…if he remembered, then…why'd he…?" Sakura blinked a few times then looked at Itachi, a new look in her eyes, one that said she wanted an answer, and she wanted it now.
"While I was unconscious…after you guys caught me…I had a weird vision that was different from any I'd had before. I saw things…and I think they were of things that almost happened, or would have happened, if I had done different things. And in one of them…I ran into Sasuke and some other Sound ninja. By that time I was in bad condition and I passed out after I started coughing up blood right in front of him."
"I know Sound is after me, so I expected him to just pick me up and leave, like all my other visions had ended up. But he did something odd. He took this necklace from me and sent one of the ninja's off with it." Sakura looked him straight in the eye, something few dared to do, and asked, "Why did he do that? If he remembers, and I think he does, then what did he think made it necessary to do that to the necklace you gave me?"
Itachi didn't say anything as he contemplated whether to tell her or not. On one hand, he knew she'd be angry if he refused to tell her, on the other hand, she could be angered by his answer. He really wasn't sure how she would react…he knew she probably wouldn't be happy, but whether or not she'd be angry was a toss up. Well, that was a better choice than not telling her…at least with telling her, there was a chance she wouldn't be angry with him.
Itachi easily wrapped his hand around her hand that was holding the necklace. "If your vision was true, then he must have remembered, because I told him about it when we got home after the eclipse. He had wanted to know how I'd found you so easily, even though I hadn't known where you'd be. He wouldn't stop asking until I told him, so I did."
Itachi paused, then said, "The necklace I gave you is infused with some of my Chakra…so I can find you no matter where you are." He looked at Sakura's face, and found that she was trying to hide her shock and confusion. He waited a moment more, wondering what her shock would lead to, but all she did was look down, still shocked.
When she didn't do anything else, he moved his hand to her chin and made her look back up at him. She seemed to be trying to figure out her emotions. He decided to elaborate his reason, "After our mission in Suna…I'd come too close to losing you…and I knew I never wanted to lose you…so I decided that I would give you that necklace, so that it would always lead me to you."
He expected Sakura to do or say something that would reveal that she was unhappy with him, but she didn't. All she did was raise her hand to take his hand off of her chin so that she didn't have to keep looking up. Now that he thought about it, it probably wasn't easy on her having to crane her neck so much to look up at him. After all, he was much taller than her, so she had a long way to look.
They sat there in silence for a while. Finally he heard Sakura quietly ask, "Why…" She was back to that question again. "Why…?" She was now looking down at her shaking hands, she clenched them, but it didn't stop them from shaking. "Why did this have to happen? Why did I…" for a moment her voice raised an octave and he felt her start to tremble yet again, "Why did I have to fall for you? Why…did this have to happen? Why-"
Itachi knew that if he didn't do something, she'd start crying again, and he knew she didn't like people seeing her cry. Once again he tilted her head and kissed her, he then pulled away, wrapping his arms around her, holding her tightly against him as he said, "Stop looking so hard for a reason that no one will ever know. It's a waste of time and energy, just like asking 'what if?'."
Itachi rested his chin on Sakura's head as he said, "Just accept things as they are. The sooner you do that, the sooner you'll feel better." Itachi kissed her head, then just held her. They stayed like that for ten minutes until Sakura began to shift uncomfortably. Itachi loosened his grip on her as he asked, "What is it?"
Sakura shifted again and he saw that her face was pink as she pointed out the obvious, "You're still holding me…"
"Yes, I am." Itachi said, enjoying how she suddenly was once again bothered by that. "If I let you go, you might fall down again."
Sakura's face got redder as she said, "I'm fine now…I won't fall down…so…could you let me go please?" Itachi smirked, but slowly removed his arms from around her, he knew what would happen. She slipped from his lap and stood up. He watched as she began walking, one step, two steps, three…she swayed, and in an instant Itachi was by her side, holding her up.
In another instant, he was holding her in both arms again and saying, "You always say you're fine, even when you know you're not. You need to stop pushing yourself."
Just then a knock came at the door and Yuri walked in to find Sakura looking very annoyed at be being held like a child once again. Yuri mentally shook her head, the atmosphere in the room was much lighter than before, and she had to wonder how that came to be…especially with Sakura now sulking.
"Miss Haruno, if you are feeling better, you had best eat dinner."
There, that was long (it took me all Saturday to write)!
You won't be finding out what Pein does to Yuri for a while probably...just because I like to keep you guessing. Same thing goes for: if Sasuke really remembers, if Sakura's father is alive or dead, who the 'higher up' is (I think I may start refering to him as the Master...since Pein is called the Leader, it makes sense. What do you think?), and other things like that.
Reviews and constructive criticisms are welcome to come into my domain…but if a flamer decides to try it, I'll tell Wolf-chan that they are a pig…and I don't think she'd care that it was a figure of speech…and the flamer would end up worse off than Ino, who was saved by a large cushion I had placed outside of the window, just in case. (fyi. The large cushion is no longer there.)
Now, on to the pretty list…oh, and here, have some bacon…or if you're a vegetarian, have this plastic bacon from my little cousin's play-kitchen.
Thanks to: xxx1xxx, krazykoreangurl, tonnora, Quiet Moon, Rangerette, Gothic Saku-chan, Kara Hitame, magickbendingdemon, Tsubasa-Angel, xnarutoxrocksx, LadySakuraForest, Akatsuki's-Kunoichi, xokatherine229, Dei-Kun's ChickaX, kikia-kiwi, White Wolf Pheonix, Chrisomu, sakura-angel113 (yeah, I'm very busy), Itachi4Eva (I know what it's like to know a story because your frined keeps talking about it. keep trying, I'm sure your friend will eventually give in and read it), XxPinkCherryBlossoms4 (Thank you. I do so love my cliffhangers...), Caramel Latte, Starlight - Wild Koneko, Flower of the Desert, Cute-killer-Gurl (yes, actually, I do think I like torturing you people with cliffhangers), Jax9, LilBitzer, UchihaMarina (other than all the tests and quizes and such, it's fine), chikarubunny (you should know me well enough by now to know I love confusing people. As to the voice part, I will tell you it was the tone of voice that was something you normally don't hear coming from him, but that's all I'll say), AngelicRedWings, Sakimi1014, Hao'sAnjul (there's only one person who knows what's really going on, me, and I'm not talking. Besides, it's fun to confuse people (: ), Addi-Chan, Fallen to Earth, animelover123456, Kittibit Gaara, Hatake Kai, Alone in a Blizzard, LaReSaKa, SnowSkadi, Chibi Saku-Chan, SpeedDemon315, 43InuAsha, sakuragirl13579, won't be the Victim (It's supposed to be), yourmaster, CosenAngel, Mittelan, dark Alley, lil'kit CC, ., & ItchiUchiha for reviewing!