"You've got sucker's luck
Have you given up?
Does it feel like a trial?
Does it trouble your mind the way you trouble mine?"
-The National, "Exile Vilify"

She never really recovered from that incident.

I think that her heart broke when he drifted away, and she just couldn't find the strength to pick up the pieces and put them back together afterwards. She had fallen into love's abyss during that time, and she offered her heart to him, only to have it snatched away. She kept pushing herself through those 17 long months, forcing herself to forget about what had happened, but the thought was like a poison, seeping through her thoughts and dragging her down. And then after what happened with Tsukishima….well, she wasn't ever the same.

After we got back to Karakura, I didn't see her for a day or two. Urahara said that she needed time to rest. What Tsukishima had done came as a shock to everyone, and she was already pushing herself. When I saw her, she was a mess. She insisted on healing everyone, even though pretty much no-one was hurt. After a while, she broke down into tears and simply sobbed for minutes. She stopped suddenly, and asked quietly if I loved Kurosaki-kun. It was one of the first questions I honestly had no answer to.

The years passed exceptionally slowly, but overall, everyone had moved on. Ishida-kun went to University, Sado had gone into the music industry and Ichigo and I spent most of our time fighting hollows or in the Soul Society. We stopped in to say hello to her now and then, and she seemed okay, but always distant, like her mind wasn't really there.

He was 19 when we first kissed. We had caught the bus to the Karakura dojo, where Tatsuki-san was doing her black-belt grading. It started raining as we walked to the bus stop afterwards, and we dashed undercover. However, it seemed that it was later than we had guessed. After waiting almost an hour for the every-15-minute-bus, we decided just to take out chances and walk back. It was only raining lightly. He and I were talking, about manga if I remember correctly, when I failed to notice a large, slimy puddle. Stepping in it, I fell onto him and he fell onto the ground, where I landed nearly totally on top. He looked a little shocked for a moment, and then pressed his lips to mine. They were hot, much more so than the cold puddle we were sitting in, although I got the feeling I was the same. (A/N: As Ichigo that is, it kinda came out wrong…) He sat up a little and his strong hand cradled the back of my head, his fingers tangled in my wet hair. I could feel his hard chest muscles through his wet shirt, and I tilted my head a little. We stayed there, kissing on the ground and in the puddle, for several minutes.

It wasn't like I had never kissed anyone before. Renji had kissed me on the cheek back when we were in the Academy, and I kissed Kaien once, but it was never like this. I realised I wanted it more than anything, and when Ichigo pulled away, panting, I had to restrain myself from pulling him right back. He smiled at me. "God Rukia, you have no clue how long I've wanted to do that…." I scowled at Ichigo and hauled him to his feet, saying "Baka. You should have done it sooner." He gave me a grin to rival the Cheshire cat's, and caught me on the mouth again.

When we arrived back at the apartment we rented together, my hand was intertwined with his, and I spent that night in his room.

It wasn't until we got married, 6 years later, that I realised how much our relationship had destabilised Orihime's world. She read out an amazing poem that she wrote, about how love could cross all boundaries, given time, and I saw in her eyes that she was still utterly in love with that Hollow. I visited her after our honeymoon. What I saw was the last thing I had expected. I knocked on her door, only to find it unlocked, and walked in to see her body on the ground, blood covering her creamy blouse. It wasn't until later, after trying to check her pulse, that I found the note on her bench.

To Ichigo, Rukia, or anyone who knows of that other world,

I'm sorry. I wish I could have said goodbye to you all, but you would've stopped me. I wish that I could explain all of this to you in person, but I'll have to make do. I didn't really realise that I truly loved someone other than Ichigo until it was too late. When Ulquiorra reached out his hand, I wanted more than anything to just touch it and leave forever, with him. When he died, I pushed myself to keep going, so that maybe, just maybe, I could forget. When we got back though, misery rained down like a thunderstorm. I thought I would never see my only love again. Then I remembered: A shinigami killing a hollow was simply cleansing its soul and allowing it to pass on to the Soul Society.

I realised that that was the only way I would ever see Ulqiorra again. So that's what I've done. He probably won't remember me, and it's likely I'll have no memory of him either, but there's a chance I will, and I'll never stop searching for him.

Ichigo, I've always loved you. But you've finally found someone better for you, even though she's been there the whole time. Don't you ever let her go.

Rukia, I'll miss you. Your sarcasm, your amazing acting in-front of other people, and your energy. Make sure Ichigo doesn't kill himself.

Ishida, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't return your love, and I'm sorry that I have to leave like this.

Tatsuki-chan, don't ever give up. You'll sit atop the world one day.

Give all of my love to everyone. I will see you again someday.

Goodbye.

It's been 10 years since she died now. Whenever we're in the Rukongai, Ichigo and I are always looking for a bright flash of dark orange hair, or the sound of her bubbly laughter. We haven't seen them yet. Somehow though, I know in my heart that she's found him now.

Wooooow, crappy ending. Yeah, sorry about that, but I was trying to get this finished before Doctor Who came on =P This was my first time actually trying to write a kissing scene well (I've got no experience, so that doesn't help), so please tell me how horrible it was! Oh, and the 'Breathe Again' refers to the way Orihime will 'breathe again' in the Soul Society.

If you review, I'll give you a cookie *Waves cookie* No? Then how about Pocky? Nooooo, that's mine! GIVE IT BACK, SCOUNDRELS! Come baaaaaaack!

Merry Christmas!