Okay, let's clarify something from the last chapter - I would never make Bella and Edward related. Carlisle is not Bella's father. This isn't Flowers in the Attic or some V.C. Andrews stuff, got me? Good. I was shocked by the number of reviews curious to know if I was making Carlisle her dad. Um... no. That is creepy.
MaggieMay14 makes this shit look good. Risbee and Acinad816 pre-read like a boss!
I don't own Twilight. I do own a mother's day card made of wallpaper.
I'm sitting on the floor of my bedroom, the Civil Wars streaming from my iPod, surrounded by copies of newspaper clippings about my mother I was able to get from the library over a week ago. I tried to talk to my mother after her gallery show the other day, but she was standoff-ish and practically ignored my questions. So, I decided to try and get some answers elsewhere, like usual. Between work and whatever this thing is with Edward, I haven't had time to focus on the documentary, but I'm trying today.
Several of the articles I printed from the archives are about museum or gallery showings, and give glowing reviews about my mother's prowess and career as an artist. There were some grainy pictures included, but I didn't recognize anyone but Renee, who was always front and center, grinning madly. I also had unearthed my birth announcement, though it didn't give me any new information.
Renee Patricia Swan, of Manhattan, is pleased to announce the birth of her daughter, Isabella Marie Swan.
Isabella arrived at 2:31am on Wednesday September 13, 1990 at Bellevue Hospital Center. She weighed 7 pounds, 6 ounces and measured 20 ½ inches in length. Proud grandparents are Lionel and Lola Clarke of Phoenix, Arizona and.
I look at the announcement again and do a double take. One, how did I never notice that Renee and Papa & Nana have different last names and two, why is the end cut off? That's some shitty ass editing there, New York Post.
I highlight the section furiously in yellow and my mind begins to run away with itself. Was Renee ever married? She did change her last name? If so, why? And why does it look like the announcement was edited? All of these reasons pique my interest and it's with a sense of satisfaction and renewed interest that I look upon my mother a few minutes later as she knocks on my door and sticks her head in.
"I am planning to order in some Thai, you want some? I was going to ask if you have plans with Edward," she adds in a sing song voice as I roll my eyes, "but you certainly aren't dressed for a hot date with a Greek god."
"First of all, Edward is not a Greek god," I reply as I shove my papers into the bottom drawer of my dresser where I have been keeping everything related to my father and my documentary. If I am being honest, Greek gods have nothing on Edward. "Secondly, Thai sounds really good actually." Renee has a gleam in her eye that hasn't been there in a while, and I jump at the chance to get some time alone with her. "How about a girls' night in? Or do you have plans with Garrett?"
"Nope, it's just me tonight... well now, it's you and me." I smile and give a curt nod, though in the back of my mind I am thinking of all the ways I plan to deceive my mother, in addition to how I already have.
I am a shitty daughter.
But I need answers.
It's just after nine when my phone buzzes with a text from Edward. My mother drunkenly grins from ear to ear. "Is that Ed-ward?" I nod and quickly read his text. He's just checking in and I write back to let him know that I am spending the night in with my mother. I'm sure he's shocked, but when I tell him my motive, he won't be. He writes back with a quick 'goodnight and good luck' and I can't hide my smile. "So, is he your boyfriend or are you just fuck buddies?
"Renee," I shout, aghast. I pause, because she is right and I have no idea what the heck we are. "We're just taking it easy."
"Whatever." Renee waves her hand dramatically at me, her red wine sloshing over from her glass and I look at her confused. "The way your face lit up when you texted says it's anything but easy."
"It's just... I'm not getting my hopes up. He's a nice guy and we're just gonna see what happens."
"I bet you'll be pregnant within a year," my mother blurts out as I look at her with my mouth wide open. That is definitely something that is not even on my radar, let alone up for discussion. "Oh, don't look so surprised, it happened to me."
"Oh?" I inquire; my interest piqued as Renee leans back against the couch and takes a long sip of her merlot.
"Sometimes, you just have to let the wind take you where you need to go, Bella."
"What does that even mean?" Renee is being beyond cryptic and she just smiles at me and raises her glass.
"It's good that you are taking it easy, but don't take it too easy. You could lose something that means the world to you."
"Are you talking about...?" I want to say 'dad' but the words won't come from my mouth, and I don't know why. Instead, I switch tactics. "Who did you lose?"
"No one... I'm just speaking metaphorically, Bella, and since when do you listen to me?"
"When you have something I want to hear, I listen." Renee reaches over and ruffles my hair, which frustrates me to no end, but then she slips. "You look just like him, you know."
No, I don't know.
I have no fucking idea who my dad is so how would I know that I look like him. Instead of railing at her for keeping my father a secret for over twenty years, I answer her with a quick sigh and leave it at that.
"He was smart, so... smart. You get your brains and your looks from him. Your maturity, too. I'm still not mature enough to be your mom, but thank god for Alice's parents helping out. We managed, but I was never a good mom, was I?" Renee now seems reflective and depressed, and I'm not sure that bodes well for me tonight. "I tried though. I still do."
I sit up and pull her in for a hug, trying my best to reassure her. "You know what? We both did the best we could. I never lacked for anything and you always provided for me. You were the best mom you knew how to be."
"Remember that year you gave me bath salts and a huge card covered in wallpaper for Mother's Day?" I don't, but I nod anyways. "You were in kindergarten and it was the cutest thing ever. There was a little poem inside telling me to have some peace and quiet by having a bath. Then on father's day you brought home a rock painted all different colors. It was supposed to be a paperweight, or a book end or something, but you said it was a door stop to keep the bathroom door open when I use my bath salts. I hated that I was both your mom and your dad, Bella. I really did hate it."
"Then why... why didn't I have a dad?"
"He wouldn't listen to me. Charlie was... Charlie..." Renee whispers his name one more time before bursting into tears.
I want to feel vindicated or something, but I'm not. I've gotten a first name out of her, though she did so drunkenly and probably won't remember a thing in the morning. I coddle my mother on the couch until she falls asleep. After I've rested a blanket over her and made sure she is somewhat comfortable, I dart to my room and position my video camera to record myself. I need to have this information if I am going to follow through with my documentary.
I push my hair from my eyes and turn on a light, making sure the room is bright enough before I speak into the camera.
"I'm not particularly proud of myself, but with Renee somewhat... inebriated, she was able to open up to me like she had never had before. I know for a fact that she never told my father that I ever existed, but I also know his name. Charlie. I wonder if he's a Charles or prefers Chuck? I don't particularly like either, so Charlie works. Now, I need to find out more."
On Sunday afternoon, I finish my shift at Forks and am about to walk out to head home, when Edward walks in. He's got a hat on backwards and is in the process of pulling his apron off when he sees me and lights up. "Well, fancy meeting you here."
"I know, it's so odd... since I work here and all." Edward grins crookedly, and I can't help but smile back at him. "You done for the day?"
"Yup, what about you?" I nod softly as Edward reaches down to take my hand in his, our fingers entwining easily as I catch Esme smiling brightly from the corner of my eye. "What do you say to dinner with me?"
"Are you offering to cook or do you plan to take me out?"
"I'm a chef, of course I would cook for you, but you would need to come to my place. No food truck grub for you. Well, not today." My cheeks burn pink at the thought of being alone with Edward in his apartment. I glance down at my clothes and groan. "You want to go home and freshen up, don't you?"
"Yeah, I just need like... an hour. Is that okay?"
"I'll wait forever for you," Edward whispers before he kisses me gently on the temple and helps me out the door. "I'll text you my address, be there by six, sweetheart." I nod and wave as I bounce away, suddenly feeling like my day is taking a wonderful turn.
I rush in the door and quickly strip before running into the shower. In twenty minutes I have shaved, buffed, polished and primped every inch of me and when I look in the mirror, I look kinda pretty. It's just dinner with Edward, but I'm still wracking my brain about what to wear. Though I know we won't go far, since he's probably working in the morning and I know he worked all day today, it can't hurt to put a little effort into my clothes. However, I have nothing that works.
Wrapped in a towel, with one perched on my head, I stroll into Renee's room, hoping to find a sundress or something that would be sexy, but didn't scream 'fuck my brains out'. Without thinking, I push the door open and am shocked to see Garrett lying completely naked with a gag or something in his mouth as my mother sits astride him.
"Oh holy lord," I shout as I run from the room, the towel from my head falling over my eyes and making me trip and hit my knee on the hall table. "Shit. Fuck. Christ." I grab my now swollen knee and hobble my way into my bedroom.
I cannot unsee what just happened, but I want nothing more than to bleach my brain or have short-term memory loss. Anything to rid myself of that.
I slip on some panties and a bra, suddenly feeling very unsexy and not too interested in having dinner with Edward, since I'm not sure I can keep any food down, when there is a soft knock on my door.
"Bella."
"No, Renee. I'm not here. I'm leaving, and I don't want to talk about it." I pull on a pair of shorts that hug my ass and grab a tunic from my closet. It's not a dress like I wanted, but I look alright, I suppose. Well, except for the red knee that is swollen like a baseball.
"It's just..." Renee continues to pester me until I fling open the door and she is standing there in a robe, while her bedroom door remains open. I glance and see Garrett still lying there and he waves happily, like this is the most normal thing in the world.
"What?"
"Did you need something?"
"Yeah, I needed not to see that!" I shout. "I thought you guys were away for the weekend."
"We came back early," she replies as I let out a small groan. "Next time we'll be louder, alright?"
"No... no. I don't want there to be a time where I come home and you are fucking him loudly, so I get the hint. As far as I am concerned you don't have sex, especially with him. Hang something on the outside door knob... anything. Something to tell me you are... indisposed. I don't want to see it or hear it." I shut my bedroom door and finish getting ready as quickly as I can, since I don't want to stay in the apartment any longer than is absolutely necessary.
It's a few minutes before six when I find myself standing in front of Edward's apartment door in SoHo, ready to knock. I'm nervous, and my knee hurts like a son of a bitch, but I'm determined to make the best of the evening. My hand raps anxiously against the door and it takes only a moment before the door flies open and Edward is standing in front of me looking absolutely delicious.
He's barefoot, in a tight black t-shirt and jeans. There is something yummy cooking on the stove and he pulls me in, shutting the door quickly behind me, before he pushes me up against it, his lips firm against mine.
It's all tongues and lips, softness and hardness, give and take, as his hands wind their way into my hair as he holds on for dear life. Not that I am ready to let go either, but I need to get a little weight off my leg, so I pull away.
"Sorry about that, I just...I couldn't stop myself," Edward replies with a grin as he licks his lips and I want to kiss him again, preferably while lying down and naked.
"No, it was fine. More than fine. Exquisite really," I gush as Edward pulls me further into his small, but cozy apartment. "It's just..."
"What's wrong?"
"I ran away from my mother when I caught her fucking Garrett in her bedroom. I went in there cause I was looking for a sexy dress to wear for our date, if this is even a date, and I fucked up my knee. I had my towel on my head, wrapped around my hair like a turban, you know? Anyways, it fell in my face and now I'm rambling on about little shit and... I'm broken."
"It's a good thing I'm handy and like to fix things." Edward scooped me up into his arms and brought me over to his couch, lying me down so my legs were extended and there was no weight on them. He stepped into the kitchen and came back a minute later with a towel and a bag of frozen peas to use as an ice pack.
"My hero," I gushed as I kissed his cheek and he smiled brightly at me.
"Let me go check on dinner and then we can talk more. Do you want some wine?"
"Sure, I'll drink just about anything." Edward stepped away, and I immediately missed his closeness. Of course, it didn't take him long to make me feel all warm and fuzzy again.
"By the way, Bella, you don't need a dress to look sexy. I think you look great right now, swollen knee and all."
Yup, I was in big trouble with this smooth-talker.
Looking for something new to read? I've recently read 'Playing it Straight' and 'Bun in the Oven' by MissWinkles and I love them both so far. A Life Less Ordinary by CullensTwiMistress has captured my attention and so has The Little Pink House by staceleo. So, go give them a read and tell them I sent you.
Also, don't forget about Smut University. I am being interviewed by the on July 28th and will have my article 'Where were these teenage sex gods where I was in school?' posted in August. Follow PTB on twitter to get updates on when the students post their smut!