3,600 words, ya'll! It's a record for me lol

sad but true.

I was going to keep going with this chapter, but I didn't know how much longer it would take me to reach my 5,000 word goal.

So, it seemed like an earlier update was a good trade for 2,000 words. maybe? maybe not?

i don't know.

let me know what you think.

let me know if you'd rather have a 5,000 word post and wait awhile for it or a 2,000-3,000 word post for an earlier update.

I will try my best to achieved both. scouts honor.

I finally found the Toy R Us, and sure enough, the red glow from Fangtasia's neon sign could be seen down the street.

The 45 minutes it took to get to Shreveport, plus the 20 minutes of my poor navigation, made it so I arrived at a fashionable time of 9:30. As I pulled into a parking spot, I recognized the all telling sign that Eric Northman was indeed inside; his signature red corvette. Butterflies fluttered inside my stomach.

Really, Linsey, it's just a car.

A really nice car.

Driven by an amazingly nice looking man-pire.

I was actually at Fangtasia.

All I had to do was go inside.

Deep breaths, just open the car door and get out…

Any minute now, I'm going to get out.

You can do this.

"Just put one foot in front of the other and soon you'll be walking out the door!"

Damn it, Linsey, not the time for show tunes!

10 minutes had past once I was finished with my "prep" talk. Mental beratement had become a specialty of mine it seemed.

The car door squeaked as I forcefully pushed my shoulder against it. It finally gave and opened, leaving me with no more excuses to stay within the confines of the little yellow crapmobile. With one last deep, hopefully calming, breath, I walked towards Fangtasia.

Okay, this is it.

There was a line of 20 odd people, that I hadn't noticed previously, standing in line outside the door. Well, I say people. They could be described better as creatures; desperate, edging on pathetic, creatures. And I would be one of them, I guess. That was a depressing thought.

I'm not one of these people.

I'm not a Fangbanger.

I would be, if a certain fang came along

I'm certainly not a V addict…

Hell! I'm not even here for fun!

I was sent here on a freakin' fairy mission!

I laughed out loud at the sheer insanity of my life causing the line to turn and stare at me. The women dressed, barely dressed, in black throughout the line glared at me as though I had just kicked their dying puppy. Apparently, Fangtasia is not a laughing matter.

No laughing, got it.

Unable to tolerate their attention, I kept my eyes to the ground while the line got shorter and shorter. My nerves were at an all time high with each person that disappeared into the club.

I heard a throat clear "Ahem, Are you coming in or not?" an obviously irritated voice broke through my daze.

Pam, the Pam, stood not 2 feet in front of me. I stood still forgetting how movement works. That is until a rude man behind me pushed me forward.

Thanks ass!

"Uh, yeah, sorry. Wasn't paying attention…"

Pam looked at me like I was an already squashed dead gnat and stuck her hand out towards me.

I stood there clueless for a moment longer.

Do you usually have to tip the door man?… door vampire?

"O, I.D. right, one second."

I put my hand into the side of my bra, fishing out my I.D.

Pam gave me an amused, questioning look, raising her eyebrow.

Like maker, like childe

"Saves from having to carry a purse. My phone's on the other side." I said answering her silent question.

She tilted her head to the side and gave my breasts a lingering glance "Never'd be able to tell" she said, sounding rather impressed.

It's true. My breasts were large enough that they just molded themselves around the object, making said object unnoticeable.

"Go on in… want me to put your I.D. back in there?" She said as she stared pointedly at my chest.

"No, thanks" I laughed "I think I can manage."

And with a turn to the left, I was inside Fangtasia.

Exactly as described in the books. Black, grey, and red everywhere. It seemed cheesy, but I had never been one for clubs, so I really had nothing to compare it to.

The music was blaring. It was some strange mix between Techno and Hip Hop. The creature like people, and the people like creatures (vamps), were bouncing around like mad. I suppose it was dancing, but it looked more like a Fangtasia bouncy castle.

More than likely there were more vampires here than just Eric and Pam. But I had no way of telling the difference unless one came up and bit me on the ass. Which I would rather not have happen…

unless it was you know who

With that thought, my head shot upward scanning the room for his "throne."

ERIC!

If butterflies were fluttering in my stomach from just seeing his car, they were swarming, no, dueling. in an all out war, in there now.

I just stared at him from across the room.

. . . .

. . . .

. . . .

What? What just happened?

It took me several minutes to realize I hadn't moved from my spot near the entrance.I shook myself out of whatever trance his face had put me under.

I am definitely going to need some liquid courage for this.

I made my way over to the bar. Longshadow sauntered over.

Yet another problem I will have to deal with, but not tonight

"What'll it be?" He said flashing a fangy smile.

"Uh, I'll do a Jack and coke, thanks" I said handing him the money for it. Londshadow nodded and went off to make my drink.

"Well, I don't know anyone named coke, but my name's Jack." a man wheezily laughed beside me, "How are you pretty lady?" he asked with a signature fangy vampire smile.

"I'm fine…" I laughed nervously.

"I'll say." He said as his eyes scanned my body like a creepy MRI. If all vampires were thought to be beautiful supernatural beings, someone really missed the mark on Jack. His hair was a nondescript shade of brown. His eye coloring matching that of his hair. We were eye level to each other, even though he was standing and I was sitting on a bar stool. His clothes looked as though the 80's threw up a tracksuit, and since he did look a day over 20, it was rather off putting. Well, it was off putting no matter what.

Longshadow set down my drink, and I gulped it down within 3 swallows.

"Hmmm, next one's on me" said weirdo Jack. He had ordered me a shot of something called Patron.

A little more alcohol assisstance couldn't hurt.

"Most people call me Jack Attack" the vamp said as if I should be impressed. I wasn't, but he continued anyway "blah blah blah loved the 80's blah sleezy comment about my body blah blah brooding vampire shtick blah you know what I mean?"

I nodded and added "uh huh" "hmm" in random spots in the conversation, even though I wasn't paying him any mind.

Jack didn't cease talking or hitting on me even though I showed no real any interest in anything he had said.

Longshadow finally came back over, bearing gifts. I took the shot of Patron and thanked him for the drink. Once I felt the warmness of the alcohol spread throughout my body, I knew I was ready to talk to Eric.

"Thanks for the drink, Jack. Nice talking to ya."

Yeah, Thanks for the courage, Oz!

I was ready to storm the stage and say "…" Well, I didn't exactly know what to say. Luckily, there was yet another line I had to wait in. Essentially, the DMV (Donate/Mate Vampire line) of Fangtasia.

Men and women stood in a row giving Eric their best "come hither" stare. The woman in front of me was wearing a vibrant pink bra and a skirt that I was pretty sure used to be her halter top but it must've drifted towards. I couldn't imagine she purposely put it there. Her posture matched that of every woman in line: Shoulder blades touching behind them so their chest stuck forwards, asses pushed out, pouted lips, trying to be seductive. I couldn't think of anyone who would find that pose attractive. They resembled flamingos rather than exuded sex appeal.

How are they all just standing around in, basically, just their panties?

I am certainly Judgey Judy tonight.

Jealous much?

I was certainly the odd one out. A little party dress was apparently a little too much fabric. My confidence level from the liquor was quickly diminishing. While waiting I had to think of what I was going to say, and fast. I tested every possible way to say "Eric."

Maybe seductively?

"Errrric"

No, definitely not

Higher pitched, no

"My name is my name is Inigo Montoya" no

Valley girl, "Uh like Hi, Eric!" no

Cool, "Yo, Eric, what's up?" nooo

"How YOU doin?"

I may be in an alternate universe but I'm pretty sure it's not the 90's anymore…

Let's try something simple:

"Sheriff, it is such a pleasure to meet you."

It's a little formal, but maybe it'll let him know I mean business.

I was quickly reminded of where I was when I was shoved forwards. I was next in line!

Omg omg omg omg omg omg

Eric was staring at me intently. All I had to do was walk up the couple steps and I would be in front of him. It felt like I was Ralphie in A Christmas Story about to meet Santa Claus. Hopefully he wouldn't push me down the slide with his boot.

With each step my heart thundered in my chest,

Omg omg omg omg omg omg

and then I was within arms reach of Eric Fuckin' Northman.

"Shirrf… Sherriff, sir" I stuttered as I bowed my head. It took me a moment to realize, but I had also held out the ends of my dress at my sides and bent at the knee.

Did…. Did I just curtsey?

Eric sat there seemingly amused at my embarrassment.

"There's no need for theatrics. What's your name?"

"I… Linsey."

You… Eric

"Welcome to Fangtasia," He said in a overly bored tone.

The silence that followed was certainly an awkward one. I hadn't planned on anything to say past "Hi" and I hadn't even done that right! I think he was expecting me to ask him to bite me or fuck me, which is all I had overheard whilst standing in line. When I said nothing, he must've thought I was stunted mentally because he looked around as if trying to find my owner. Obviously, no one took claim of me so he just waved me off.

Something finally clicked in my head

"No, wait! I need to talk to you" I said quickly.

This is NOT going as planned!

He raised a perfect questioning brow.

"In private, if we could… please?"

He sat quietly for a moment, eyeing me head to toe.

"Yes, I'm hungry and I could do with a break." he said, standing up and waving the rest of line away. I heard grumbles and mutterings as I watched the group of people disperse.

"Hungry? That's not…" I started, but he had already walked away and into the hallway near the bar.

Am I supposed to follow him?

I stood on the stage a moment longer before I decided

Fuck it…

I walked down the corridor, passing many pissed off "vermin" as I remember them being called. It was kind of fitting for some of them. The first door I passed was a supply closet. That was an odd moment since I had interrupted some fun times going on in there. The female vampire hissed at me, to which I just stared wide eyed, said a quick "sorry" and awkwardly closed the door.

Found the bathrooms… only one door left.

I should have known he would have an office at the end of a long corridor. Once past the bathrooms it was quite a walk to his door. I'm sure it was used as an intimidation tactic because with each step closer the feeling of dread increased.

Or it was because who would want their office door near the bathrooms?

My hand was shaking as it neared the door, I knocked, as a precaution.

GET SOME GUSTO! SOME GRIT!

I admonished myself.

What is wrong with you? Just talk to him like a normal human being!

Don't be weird!

"Enter!" he bellowed.

I opened the door and Eric was sitting on a black leather couch looking annoyed.

Eric Northman. Eric Northman.

Deep breath. Do. Not. Fangirl!

"I don't like to be kept waiting." he said as stood, eyeing me "But you are new here so I'll give you a second chance." Eric had said as though he was doting upon me some great honor.

That arrogant!…

okay, okay, any other time I would be willing to lick his shoe for a "second chance" don't try to lie to yourself, Linsey.

If I was honest, it was becoming increasingly difficult to not fall victim to his good looks. Especially, as he began to slowly walk towards me.

Do not pounce him. Do not pounce him!

I backed up against the door, closing it fully by doing so. He was getting closer and I was running out of time, and self control, to stop this.

Stay strong!

I couldn't imagine how I looked pressed up against the door, as if trying to merge myself into it. Eric half chuckled "It's been awhile since I've had a shy one. This could be fun." He smiled the Northman smile. A smile that could only be on his perfect face… that was suddenly mere inches away from my own.

Let Sookie live her own life, Bill wasn't THAT bad said the devil on my shoulder.

No… we can't the angel on the opposite side tried, halfheartedly.

I have to be the voice of reason here! ?

I put my hands up against his shoulders

His muscular shoulders

And pushed him back, dying a little on the inside for doing so.

"Mr. Northman, I'm not here to be a late night snack." I said apologetically "I think there was a misunderstanding, when I asked to 'speak to you in private'… I actually meant 'speak'"

He was nonchalant "Well, then you may go."

I almost followed his command.

"No." I surprised myself in saying rather firmly "I really do need to talk with you."

"Then make an appointment." Eric said as he took a seat behind his desk.

"It's important!" I was really becoming aggravated.

Things were not playing out as I had envisioned and as stupefying-ly attractive as he was, I had a job to do. Lives could very well depend on me.

"O. well, it it's important" he mocked me "make an appointment." he finished, making a shooing gesture.

Did he just shoo me? !

I walked over to a chair in front of his desk and sat. I may have childishly stomped, a little.

"Mr. Northman, what I have to say concerns both of us." I stated firmly again.

His head raised at that and he let out an annoyed sigh "Fine, you have 5 minutes."

"I have come here to ask for your help."

He gave me a look that said I needed to explain more, and time was running out.

"Protection. For a friend."

"Protection? In exchange for what?"

Panties combust in: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

And there's the smoldering suggestive look.

If he wouldn't have been such an ass…

"I'm afraid that would be over selling your protection" I joked.

He smirked, the Northman smirk.

I was still in awe of being in the same room, the same universe, as Eric Northman. But the realization of what I was here to do, in effect to save lives, sobered me up quickly. And luckily, made me less of a bumbling idiot.

"So what are you offering?" he asked.

"Information." I stated simply. "I know things… about your business… and what not"

"What kinds of things?" Eric was becoming rather angry. I don't know if he thought I was trying to blackmail him. Hindsight, I could've worked the conversation a little better.

"Well, I… I can't tell you, now. You have to agree to help my friend…?" I was quickly losing the façade that I knew how to do business with a vampire.

"Tell me!" he demanded in a growl, which in any other circumstances would have made me naked in 5 seconds flat. But, it was frightening. If anything, I wanted to put more clothes on just so there'd be more separating us.

"Mr. Northman, I…" my words were cut off when I was forcefully pushed onto the floor, a cold hand around my throat. Sucking in air after it had been knocked out was a difficult task on it's own, but add windpipe being blocked as well, damn near impossible.

"You. Will. Tell. Me. What. You. know" he demanded coldly, staring into my eyes.

I felt that compulsion I felt when Bill had told him to invite him into the Stackhouse home. But, instead of being stronger, like I had imagined it would've been with a vampire 7x his age, it was weaker. Almost like my body was becoming immune to some strain of virus.

Like chickenpox I concluded.

"Mr. Northman, I'm. trying. to. help. you." I gasped out between breaths.

He looked stunned for a moment. Of course, he would be. No one had resisted his glamour before, since he hadn't met Sookie yet.

His stunned silence was replaced by a growl and a tighter grip around my throat. My breathing became even shallower, which was quite a feat. With the lack of oxygen, my brain decided it was close to nap time. Possibly, dirt nap time.

At least I'll die with a good view.

It'd be better if he wasn't snarling, though….

"Northman! Let the girl go!" A talking fuzzy blur said behind the homicidal blur on top of me.

THANK YOU FOR ALL THE REVIEWS, PM'S, FAVORITES, AND ALERTS! YOU GUYS ARE GREAT AND SO ENCOURAGING!

I'll try to be not so shitty about taking forever to post.

Since I am also an avid fanfic reader, I know how much it sucks to not have regular updates.

I wish I could just brain vomit on my laptop and the story would be finished so you wouldn't have to wait anymore.

but sadly, no can do.

review if you have the time :)

until next time, my lovlies.

(p.s. minus the spaces

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