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Logan growled a little to himself when his nostrils became aware of another human being besides him, but a second sniff forced him to register who exactly that human being was. He opened his eyes and met the icy green stare of Rogue. His smile remained un-returned as she glared at him, whether she was aware of it he did not know but he decided to find out what the hell was going on. He sat down in the bed, his hair all askew and glared right back at her, her face did not change. She merely continued to invade his mind with the emotions she expressed to him at that moment.
"What the hell ya lookin' at stripes?" Logan asked her, as calmly as he could. She sat down as well, the frail blanket falling to her lap, unaware of the flesh that she had exposed. He on the other hand was fully aware of her figure through the thin long shirt that she had been wearing the night before. He mentally shook his head and brought his mind back from wherever it had been heading. Her chilled voice further removed the previous distraction from his mind's eye, she definitely sounded pissed.
"You loved her Logan," she said to him, her voice was as cold as ice and he heard the hint of betrayal that caused the slightest shake to its serenity. He was unable to speak, knowing exactly who she was talking about and not wanting to interrupt. "When ah went into the room and saw her, ah could feel how much ya loved her. You couldn't wait to grow up Logan; ya wanted ta marry her someday."
"So…I'm James?" Logan whispered his words, more of a statement then a question. She did not respond and instead continued to glare at him; he took in a deep breath as the fact that he had a name registered in his mind. They looked at one another for a long time as it registered in his mind that he had been that little boy, the one she had been playing. His fear as a child had been evident on her face that night, but he did not understand why he would be afraid of himself. She had shouted Mr. Logan to him in fear; perhaps she had already been coming to and had remained unaware of it. "What else did you feel Rogue?"
Rogue looked away when she saw the searching look on his face. She tried to get her mind back to the present and ignore the anger that surged through her. She felt quite possessive of his emotions at the moment and now that she was knowledgeable at the way he had felt towards another woman, who looked exactly like Jean, hurt her. She had always felt inferior to Jean and now to know that even Logan's affections would lie on someone like her; it was a reminder of what she would never be able to have. A reminder of how worthless she would always be.
"All right…ah remember the groundskeeper's face or Mr. Logan through your eyes. He looked exactly like ya Logan, a replica. Ah thought that maybe it was you but how could ah be you and look at you at the same time?" She asked this question of herself and watched him ponder; his face as puzzled as she was sure her own looked. She sighed heavily and looked up at him, his eyes glazed over as he attempted to find a distant memory he was not able to conjure. She allowed her anger to slip and put her hands over his, bringing him back to earth.
Logan waited for the rush that always came with her touch to flow but it never did. They had become one that day, their minds, bodies, hearts and souls. He lifted his hand up and without thinking pulled her into his chest, her cheek being brushed by the soft hair that covered him. She wrapped her arms around him and he felt the urge to squeeze her until they were as one as their minds seemed to be but a knock on the door forced them to leap apart as if they had been caught in some act of sin.
"Logan…its Jean," a soft voice said from behind the closed door. Logan looked over at Rogue who had already slipped on a pair of gloves she kept at his bedside. He could not see her face but her rigid back said it all. He opened the door and stared down at Jean as if he was boring a hole through her head. He was merely trying to concentrate on it; attempting to see what Rogue saw at that moment, perhaps he would understand why Rogue thought he might want her.
Rogue walked over to them and saw Logan's eyes skimming over Jean and felt a rush of jealousy. She slipped the gloves off her fingers and placed it against his shoulder blade, forcing her thoughts out. Logan's throat tightened and his lungs shrunk for a split second as Rogue's thoughts and feelings entered his own. He then saw Jean for what James had seen; she was beautiful, pure and kind. Her eyes were wide and warm, something he did not experience often. He also felt pain as he thought of his pup, the one who had been killed by the hands of Dog; a face so familiar yet he could not place his finger on it. The last thought was a feeling of inadequacy, he felt like the small little boy she had portrayed. He had felt for that single session as if he were to get an asthma attack, which he had never had before. Had that been him? Had he been a weakling?
Logan had always been strong and more so with the healing ability that he held. But there was something in that brief emotion that revived in him the understanding that he was not who he had thought he was now. Perhaps with all the years that had passed by he had slowly built up the stamina to face life. Perhaps with all the people who had died and had passed on as he continued to live, he hoped to keep them at a distance. He felt a great sense of loss and guilt now as he looked at Jean. There was something that was trying to force itself out and all he wanted to do was let it go but it was not the time. He turned towards Rogue who continued to look at Jean and he followed Jean to the library; she seemed unaware of the transition that had occurred between him and Rogue. Not even Logan had realized that instead of sucking out his thought, she had given him her own.
They entered the professor's office that had a full report on his desk, cover sheet and all. Logan cocked his head to the side and raised his brow at the efficient redhead. He was sure she had spent much time seeking the information he had needed and he was truly grateful to her for that effort. His ears perked at the quickened pattern of a heartbeat and looked over at Rogue who quickly turned her face to the professor before her. She had been watching his every move, it was disconcerting to see and feel what she was currently emitting. The whole transfer was taking a serious toll on his brain. He coughed into his hand and took in a deep breath before waiting patiently for the professor to hand him the papers. Why did he not just take them? He was sure that it was fear of the unknown, what would he find?
"Well Logan," the professor began, his voice soft and soothing to the ear, even though to Logan it sounded like the voice of death at that given moment. "It seems that the name Howlett existed quite some time ago. The name can be dated back to the late twelfth century and early thirteenth. You would find some interesting facts on the parentage of these people…as well as theirs."
Logan grabbed the piece of paper that held an image of a yellow and black design, seemingly similar to the colors he wore from his X-Men uniform. On top of a helmet was an Owl that held a rose between his claws, the site was alarming. He held it tightly between his hands as the ever so slight shaking caused the paper to rattle in the deafening silence. The professor continued on with his explanation.
"It seems that the Howlett estate is dated back to being one of the first built during the early 1600's in Norfolk, Virginia. Right now, the only ones who dwell there is an old family friend who had been given the deed to the house," Xavier told him. The place flooded with silence since there was no more to say. The address was there and no phone number had been located, but the words they had all expected to hear had risen.
"I'll be leavin' in an hour," Logan said and stood straight up. "Scott can take over the lessons; the kids got a break comin' up so you'll have more help in takin' care of the kids."
"All right Logan, will you be taking Ororo with you, at least for any help or guidance in the matter," Xavier saying, knowing the answer already but receiving another response that shocked him.
"No, I'll be goin' at it alone…unless I can take Stripes with me. She knows me better then I know myself," he said honestly. Rogue looked up at him in confusion, unsure of why he would take her along. Her eyes narrowed at the thought that he would ask her to join him on a mission he had always wanted to pursue on his own.
"Logan this is not appropriate. I cannot allow you to take one of the young girls alone to another state," Xavier said, wanting to help but whose ethics were gaining on him.
"Unless you can control the beast inside of her, I can't see why not. Nobody's gonna be able to handle it if she loses control, and I won't be here to take care of her," Logan insisted. He was going to take her with permission or not, but better with permission. The nod of Xavier's head was received with a grunt in return. He stood up and looked over at Rogue whose eyes were now wide at being allowed to leave with him. "Get your things, not a whole luggage case just enough to fit in your school bag and meet me by the van."
"All right," she answered and looked over at the professor whose eyes held concern. She touched his hand with her gloved one. "Ah'll be all right Prof, ah swear ah will. Logan won't let anyone hurt me, he'll protect me."
She left the room quickly to get her things together. The professor, completely unaware that Jean was still in the room, let out words of concern and leaned back in his chair.
"But who will protect Logan?"