This chapter would be a little bit sad, so before we start, I decide to insert a harmless joke.
Lei Lei serves Po a cup of tea while Tigress runs her errands across the village. When she came home, Po told her,"Tigress, watch this!" He announced proudly. Lei Lei serves her tea. Tigress smiled,"Thank you, Lei Lei," and turned to the grinning panda."Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is from the toilet?"
Well… the funny bit is done with, now… let's go to the depressing business.
NOTE: all grammatical error are mine.
Jin Chang, Mongolian border. A few months later.
After traversing a long distance from Valley of Peace, I finally arrived in Jin Chang. Marked by tall spires of various monument and pagodas, the sprawling metropolitan city was solidly encased by thick walls of defense against their neighboring country, Mongolia.
The Shang's summer house resided in a solitary hill, outskirt of the city―a favorable distance away to reap the benefit of both the embrace of the city's convenience balanced with the privacy of the country life. Dressed in likewise opulence, the house was bearing resemblance that could rival the Shang's residence in Gongmen minus the number of menacing looking guards and over-enthusiastic chamberlains.
At the bottom of the broad, majestic stairs, I stared at the magnificent home that Lord Shang had given to us as our wedding present months ago. The splendid structure was supported by a few red pillars. Its wall was etched with detailed carvings, painted painstakingly and alternated with jade marble tiles. The edge of the roof was gilded with silver and gold, gleaming under the perusal of late summer sun. The land around it flourished with lush grassland, winsome willows weaving above the river, and well-cultivated flower borders.
A middle age sheep, named Fu Ling, introducing herself as the head of the servants, addressing me reverently as I stepped in.
"Master Tigress, we have been expecting you. Please do come in." She bowed deeply. Without much ceremonial preamble, Fu Ling shepherded me to the wing of the palace that had been allocated to me. A pot of tea, fresh robes, fluffy slippers suddenly emerged from nowhere. Fu Ling casually offered me a warm bath to provide instant relief from my long journey ―an offer that I find it very hard to resist. I was relieved to see the lack of formality and etiquettes in this place. Reminiscing a full month I spent in the Shang's residence, I found myself unable to endure another banquet with dignitaries or any formal family dinner. I wanted to relish my food the way I like it… for once!
After the warm bath, I settle into my opulent quarter. In the middle of the room was a large canopy bed dressed in gold and cream thread. The walls of the room decorated with a never-ending mural, depicting the story out of 'Romance of the Three Kingdom,' which Fu Ling expressively told me, had been commissioned specially by my father in law request especially for me.
Later on that evening, Li Lien arrived by the gate of the house. Unlike the colossal celebration when Master Tiger married me―as a mistress, moreover, from non-respectable background―the Shang's invited almost no one to commemorate such an important union, which I found the discrimination was rather appalling.
Li Lien arrived wearing a simple crimson dress, her head covered with a plain red veil. Next to her was Ah-Ma, the only accompaniment for her during the entire journey and her only other wedding guest beside me. A goose attendance ushered her into her bedchamber, where she was told to wait until the master of the house came to see her. Disconcerted for the lack of attention on one of the most important days of a woman's life, I ordered Fu Ling to prepare a banquet for us tonight. I even invited all the servants as guests.
We all had a great time that night, filled with music through our ears and drowned with overwhelming food in our stomach. Tiger spent the night with her new mistress, while I retreated into my chamber, offering the new couple the privacy they needed. Part of me wondered whether Tiger would tell his mistress what had happened between him and me that fateful wedding night. But I figured it wouldn't alter anything much. It's not like I planned to sleep with him again since that inescapable incident.
Exhausted from the long journey and the banquet, I sunk into the comfort of my bed, musing about my fate these past few months. Can I imagine? The ferocious and stoic Master Tigress, one day, would approve to enter into an arranged marriage contract with a stranger? Moreover embroiled herself in polygamy? Yes, people may not know the full story in its entirety. But it was weird to say I was pleased it worked so well. I became a close friend with the guy who married me and turned like a sister to the girl who he took as a mistress. Maybe my mother was right… there are some who were lucky to find friendship and companionship in arranged marriage. And who knows, I might be fortunate enough to find love.
The Jade Palace ground was quiet this morning, save it for the splash of water I made from trying to wash the mountain of dirty laundry from my travel to Jin Chang. While Tiger stayed in his new home, I had decided to return to Valley of Peace almost immediately, remembering the fact I still have a duty to fulfill at my post in Jade Palace.
In the past one month, I returned to the valley, life almost restored to the way it had been. However, of course, my day of training and teaching was now regularly colored by the daily household routine. When I said household routine that included everything else you could think of apart from cooking. While Mr. Ping gave me a recipe book as my wedding present, I honestly told him that reading it was like reading horror fictions. I got to the end chuckled satirically to myself 'Well, that's not gonna happen.'
Far away from the luxury of having a team of chamberlains at my disposal, I woke up a little earlier each morning to complete my daily chores before heading to the Training Hall. Felt that I was more than capable to take care of my household, I persistently declined Shifu's offer to beckon the Palace's goose servants to aid me doing the housework. Being a proud girl, I would never let petty domestic challenges won over me. I told Shifu when I was ten years behind on my ironing ―I may consider his proposal.
It was when I was still fighting through the pile of laundry, a messenger arrived.
"Excuse me?" His raspy voice caught my attention,"I have a message for Master Tiger." He solemnly announced. I cocked my head behind the towering pile of stinky garments to have a better look. The messenger was a falcon, dressed in a robe that clearly wasn't carrying any Chinese semblance. His Mandarin accent punctuated with strange vowel twist at the end of each sentence. I immediately concluded he must be from up north. Russia or Mongolia.
I put down my washing and absently dried my damp paws on the hem of my qipao before approaching him. "I am Master Tigress, his wife. Unfortunately, my husband isn't around at the moment. May I take the message on his behalf?" I suggested. His frustrated sigh was perceptible and audible from where I stood.
Fixing his unwavering stare, he was quick to refuse my suggestion."By strict order from my Master that this message was for him and his eyes only." He stated, not unkindly nor curtly, but not kindly either.
"He will be in Jin Chang for a reasonable amount of time," I told him.
Grunting irritatedly, the messenger knew he left with no choice but to fly to his new destination."So I have wasted my time traveling this far just to returned to where I've been." He whined.
"Where are you flying from if I may ask?"
"South of Ulaanbaatar." His voice positively laced with annoyance. Jin Chang was right on the border of Mongolia and China. It's no wonder the messenger felt half of his effort wasted in vain. He mumbled something to himself and pulled a crumpled map from under his robes. I was about to ask him whether he would like a cup of tea or something to eat before his long journey. But before the words climbed from my throat to my lips, the messenger had left in a hurry.
Around a month later Tiger visited me. All of us obviously, including me, were delighted to see him albeit not as often as he had promised me―I didn't hold any grudges on account of his absence, we were just pleased to he was able to come.
It was then I registered something was off-kilter. Tiger was still the jovial, spontaneous and silly guy we all knew. But I was sure, in some fleeting moment, anxiety and distress often painted through his posture. I sensed he was concealing something.
Without my agreement, he placed me under his strict surveillance. He never let me came off his sight without one of the Five accompanying me. Nor he let me go on village patrol alone. He was very insistent on following me to the pick up our meal from the Pings and tailing me every time I wanted to meditate by the tranquility of ironwood forest. He nearly drove me insane with his despicable invasion of my personal space. Every time I asked him 'why' he just gave me an unexplainable shrug and a tight smile.
I knew he meant well, but at some point, his act of affection had rubbed a wrong nerve on me. Right after dinner, I proclaimed to the rest that I was heading to the bathhouse. Monkey and Mantis tidied up the clutter when I made my casual exit. I noticed the smug smile sweeping across Shifu's withering face. It was almost borderline scandalous. "Have a good time!" He tittered teasingly. Then I realized my sham husband was following me, humming a cheerful tune and striding towards the same direction. I stopped in my tracks.
"Tiger. What are you doing?"
"Taking a bath." He answered innocently and flashed his white smiles.
"You can take your bath in our house or wait until I am done." I gave him a knowing look. At first, he pretended not noticing any of my objection until I extended my paws, hindering him to pass and forcing his attention to return to the topics. I saw arrayed of emotions in his eyes.
He expelled a long, audible drag. I could sense he wasn't in the appetite for confronting with my obstinate argument. "I need to keep an eye on you." He said, feeding his sight on the dust on the floor.
"Are you truly that obsessed with me or are you hiding something?" I pressed on firmly. I saw my sham husband swallowed a sizeable lump of uneasiness from his throat. But he quickly established his composure.
"Oh come oonnn… Tigress, we are husband and wife. Surely no one will mind if we took a bath together?" He moped.
WHAT? Shaking the dazed look on my face, I whirled around grabbing the collar of his vest. "I know no one won't. But I mind!" My chest heaved, trying to quell the burgeoning annoyance. If he were wishing I could be the submissive spouse who consented his each and every demand without any words of opposition―He had picked a wrong wife.
"Ok, but let me at least let me stay outside." He stubbornly quipped.
"Tiger!" I scowled exasperatedly. The tiger pursed his lips like a little child and twiddled his claws animatedly. Witnessing his pointless act, my hardcore heart mollified, and guilt crept on my chest. Furthermore, not liking the prospect that he had nothing else to do but to peep me―I gave him consent to join me in the tub. "Ok fine! You can get into the tub, but you must shut your eyes all the time. If I caught you peeping, I would stuff your underwear into your mouth!"
"Ouch, lady. I only have very few spare underpants for this stay." He taunted, a mischievous grin spread across his face. "Perhaps you could knit one for me, so at least you could tell Shifu all the knitting tuitions didn't go in vain."
"I have never seen a knitted underpants before," I replied him dryly. My tired mind had refused to think any witty comeback at his ridiculous proposition.
I descended to the hot water, letting the warmness seeping into my exhausted form, while Tiger followed soon with his undies still intact. I risked a steely glance at him. With his eyes firmly closed, he let pensive sigh escaped from his lips. He seemed to focus on the marvelous warmth that penetrated into his being, but occasionally, I noticed his expression turned dark and serious.
Tiger's stay was brief but heartfelt. In the seclusion of my room, often time, I was secretly missing his presence. Perhaps yes, it was true, distance makes hearts grow fonder.
I didn't see him for months to come. However, he left an unexplainable request to the rest of the Five to continue escorting me everywhere. None of the Five exactly knew the real reason behind his weird paranoia. I decided to subdue my inquisitiveness and waited for the right moment to dig out the truth out of him.
Months flew by without anything worth mentioning. I had not seen both Tiger and Lien for quite a while. Tiger was still insistent that traveling to Jin Chang alone was too dangerous for me, thankfully Lien wrote to me regularly to fill the gaps with her updates.
His ludicrous injunction stung my pride. I saw him doubting my ability to fend myself. Disregarding his prohibition, I plotted to pay him and Lien a surprise visit, just to make a point. But before I had a chance to execute my plan, the universe decided to alter my intention completely.
I was in the middle of our usual drills when Zheng burst into the Training Hall to announce I had an unexpected visitor.
I ran towards the Palace gate to find Li Lien. Suffering from her panda asthma and other ordeals from a long journey, she sprawled at the edge of the ledge.
"Lien! What are you doing here?"
"Tigress… you must go! He needs one of us! You must help me find him! Hurry!" Her voice was dripping with fear.
Shocked and thrown back with her succession of confusing requests, I grabbed her shoulder to shake some sense defeating her panic."Who? Why? Calm down and tell me everything inside." I gestured Zheng to help up with her belonging and ushered her into the quarter.
Viper offered the panda a cup of tea, while Monkey, Crane, and Mantis preparing my old bedroom in the student barrack for her. With the vestiges of her strength, Li Lien explained that Tiger―after joining the Imperial artillery as a captain―was involved in a dangerous operation dealing with Turks rebels.
Her words billowed like a tidal wave. I was shocked. Many of the information Lien narrated were all new to me. I had never known Tiger had left the Kung Fu Academy to join the Army. Moreover, Tiger hated bloodshed, and joining the battalion would put him exactly into that.
In such urgency, Lien told me she couldn't explain the background that compelled Tiger to leave his post as Kung Fu Master. It would be a story for another day. However, a few days ago, she received the devastating news that he was captured by the separatist group while spying them, and probably won't ever returned alive. In her dismay, she ran for my help.
"Zheng, please prepare my pack," I instructed the goose. Briskly, I went to inform Shifu and the four. "Oh, Zheng… and yes, please take care of my laundry and ironing!" The goose messenger showed his thumb and nodded understandingly.
For days, I ran on all four, dashing through the beaten path, meandering through the forest, traversing through rivers. Upon seeing a large makeshift tent, I barged inside.
"Master Tigress!" A familiar looking giant ox saluted me. Next to him was a few of soldiers from the Imperial Army."I am General Tsang, the battalion leader."
"General, I am here to inquire about my husband." I declared between my attempt to regulate my breathing from all the running. The ox stiffened, his face blanched. He stared at me for a long time before coming back to his senses.
"Of course, of course!" He replied swiftly, averting his gaze towards a table with large annotated map in the middle of the room. But by the darkening frown that creased his brows and the thundering expression that clung on his face, I knew something terrible had happened.
"I take it you have heard the news that your husband was captured by the rebel a week ago." He selected his words scrupulously,"We have sent a reinforcement attempting to retrieve him a few days ago." He paused, anxiety radiating from his voice like a blazing fire. Facing his back against me, he continued."This rescue mission would not be an easy feat. The rebels are a bunch of ruthless fugitives. Saving him is not something I can promise. I am sorry."
My heart was pulsing with raw apprehension, but I tried to remain positive and composed. "Let me stay here for a few more nights. If you send more reinforcement, I could join in and assist." I offered expressionlessly. I saw a line of disagreement forming on his lips. He opened his mouth, but abruptly close it again and turned away from me. "We wait until tonight for more news, Master Tigress. We shall discuss and revise our decision then."
That night, drifting in my troubled sleep, I heard the sound of panic foot-beats and clanking metal.
"The reinforcement had returned!" I listened to a strained yell. Without a second thought, I leaped out from my tent to follow the dissonance. I saw a group of men in uniform stormed off the medical makeshift shelter. One of the soldiers pulled my shoulder to the side.
"You must be Master Tigress." His smiled with a weird mixture of relief and regret. "We found your husband, but he was severely injured. Let the doctor take care of him at the moment." I agreed silently, curbing my desire to break into the infirmary uninvited.
After a long half an hour that felt like decades, the medical team announced that Tiger was in stable condition for me to visit him. They had a few broken words with me about the fatality of his injury that had sent my heart down to the floor.
With unbridle eagerness, I entered the treatment room. The pungent smell of antiseptic infused with the metallic scent of blood lingered in the air.
My pleasure seeing him ripped into anguish. His tall form encased in armor that no longer shine. Deep marks of dents and scratch from brutal contact bore clear evidence against every visible surface. A foreign force bubbled in my chest watching his bloodied, listless form resting beneath the pile of bandages and broken armor. But having not laid my eyes on him after months of absence, silently, I confessed that I was pleased to see him. Under the influence of strong medicine, he seemed to be peacefully sleeping. His heartbeat was thudding in a perfect rhythm, his chest rise and fall effortlessly. His vital sign gave me a false sense of comfort that everything was going to be fine.
I knelt before him, not knowing how to feel, what to say, how to react. I felt an unknown impulse to stroke his paw, to bury my head in his burly chest, just to tell him that I was glad he made it alive, albeit realizing he may not be aware of my presence.
I addressed the familiar sense of fear sliced my soul. The same one when I saw the metal ball propelled against Po, when a sword protruded from Monkey's chest and when I saw Kai's merciless onslaught had taken Shifu and the rest of my family. I thought by now I would be immune to that kind of emotion that tormented my soul.
"Tiger… don't worry. I am here." I leaned forward to give him a terrified kiss on his cheek. I must make sure he returned home safely, especially for Lien.
Inadvertently, my ears caught a distant conversation from a slight gap of the tent.
"I already told him, he was far too inexperienced for such a dangerous task. Now look what happened." I heard a gentleman's voice complained despondently at the bleak outcome.
"But he was eligible, just like any of us. Remember the Empress would grant the monetary compensation to whoever managed to get that missing piece of information from the rebel group," rebutted the other.
"You are suggesting that Master Tiger is here for the money? I can't believe that. His parents are one of the richest aristocrats in Gongmen. To be honest, I think he doesn't even need to work for the next seven generations!"
"Who knows? I heard he just got married… maybe it is to satisfy some of his wife's expensive taste?"
"Ssshhh… you mean Master Tigress?" the other voice lowered sparingly."Naaah… I can't believe that. She hardly wears any pieces of jewelry. Besides, as Kung Fu Master, I think she took a pledge to live modestly."
"What about his new….. Mistress?" Their speech hushed into conspirational whispers.
Another person's tone raised in surprise,"He had another one? Was there something he wasn't satisfied with Master Tigress that he needed to turn to another?"
My patience was wearing thin. I almost tempted to confront and to seize these gossipers' throat for their unwarranted speculation over our personal life. But a question begged my mind, why Tiger suddenly joined the Army, even bid for such a dangerous position on the battlefront. Was he here for the money? Although I knew him only for a short period of time, I was sure savage killing and bloodied aggression never be his thing―which very much contradicting his endeavor to accept the post as the captain of the front line battalion.
After spending another day in the encampment, I requested to take Tiger home whereby his family could nurse and attend to his injury. Acknowledging that his wounds weren't life threatening, Army General Tsang―a former friend and comrade of Tiger's father, granted me the permission.
Deliberately, I took a detour to drop him at his parent's house in Gongmen, where he would receive the top-class treatment from the trauma. However, I firmly believed it wouldn't change the devastating situation and the fatality of the damage that had been done.
Tiger and I spent our way to Gongmen sitting in silence. Although there were a lot of things I wanted to say, I found it highly inappropriate to ask him. But at the last hour, before we arrived at his residence in Gongmen, he reached my hand and embedded it gently with his massive paw.
"Tigress... I need to tell you something." His voice grinded hoarsely around the edge.
I placed my other paw and wrapped it atop his,"I am listening."
"In my condition now, I wouldn't be able to protect you." He voice was strangled with frustration and his posture turned somber.
"Tiger, what are you talking about… you know I ―"
"You are a capable warrior, Tigress. That I knew. But I am convinced someone is watching us and has taken a serious interest in you." He clenched one of his paw channeling his anger and irritation.
If only he could see my confused expression. "What do you mean?" Instead of giving me a satisfying answer, he continued his line of narration.
"Tigress, promise me that you never travel alone. Don't visit Lien and me except if we come to visit you. I wished I could tell you more, Tigress. But you have to trust me and my judgment on this." I looked at him. Despite the wound, he sat rod straight. His muscle flexed beneath his attire, giving no impression of feebleness. He pulled a long disgruntled sigh.
"But…―" I was rudely interrupted.
"Tigress…!"
The unusual sharp, condescending tone of his voice startled me, killing all my defiance right on my lips. Then I understood. Tiger was speaking not as a friend. At the moment he was Master Tiger, my husband and he demanded nothing but his wife obedience and compliance. "I… I promise." I stuttered unwillingly.
He dragged his breath slowly, regretting his harsh, explosive tirade which he had projected on me "Good. Forgive me...there is a lot of things in my mind." The contemptuous aura had left him, in exchange to intense sadness. He paused to select his words. "Now… If-if anything ever happened to me. I had left a letter for you with Ah-Ma." He spoke softly."And you will understand why I do what I did."
"Tiger… why―"
"I am sorry. I can't tell you more, not at the moment. But in time, everything would become clear to you." His face staring dejectedly into space.
Our caravan stopped. I tried to helped him to stand up, but inadvertently he pulled away from me, silently refusing my help. I knew he hated to appear weak, fragile and defeated in front of me. In the act of preserving his dignity, I gestured a few attending guards and servants to assist him. He dismounted from our transport, leaving me alone to continue my journey home.
"Please tell Lien, I love her."
I may not be able to see his expression beyond the tangled bandage that covered most of his visage. But the heaviness in his heart was radiated through the sorrowful modulation of his voice. I knew he couldn't see me. I was masquerading my emotion behind my usual stoic facade, but he could sense an atmosphere of melancholy wrapping my form. He swiftly straightened himself before approaching,"...and I love you too, Tigress. I would never forgive myself if anything happened to you." With that, he planted a kiss my forehead.
And then my impregnable mental defense broke.
With my heart laid in confused emotion and my eyes damped with tears, I slowly headed home to Valley of Peace, where Li Lien had been waiting for me. Rather than relying on usual goose messenger to deliver my correspondence, I decided the tidings should be delivered directly from my mouth, no matter how unpleasant. I sluggishly dragged my feet climbing the towering palace's thousand steps, while my mind perilously arranging the most diplomatic word to water down the calamitous nature of the news.
"Tigress! Oh, I am glad you are back… how is Tiger? Where is he? Is he okay?" Lien bombarded me with loads of question. Her voice was colored with a mixture of utmost delight, a sudden reprieve and brimming anticipation for me to spill more satisfying details of my meeting with her husband.
"Calm down Lien…. I've seen him, and yes… he is alright. I took him to his home in Gongmen where the professional could attend his injuries and nurse him back to health." I gave her an imperceptible smile.
"Oh thank goodness!" Her voice was positively gushing with relief.
"However, Lien… something I must tell you," I took a few calming breath, reaching her paws to show my empathy. I knew my next statement would cut her delicate heartstrings to pieces.
"I am afraid. The assault had left him blind―Permanently."