A/N: Happy new year and let's hope that J.J has a good year planned for Vaughn and Syd, I know that I'll be tormenting them as much as possible so their possibly future reunion will be that much sweeter!!! Ha Ha, nah, I actually have one fanfic which is currently…pure bliss! Read and enjoy. Review if you can.

When She Was Bad

Total Vaughn Lover

The Consequence of Mixing Work with Life

(In a briefing room for a disciplinary hearing: Langley)

"Agent Michael Vaughn"

At the mention of his name, Michael tentatively stood up from his seat and faced the board of directors, who for some reason had allowed Will Tippin to witness the assessment. "Yes sir," he stammered, hoping that not being addressed with "Director," at the beginning of his name didn't indicate he'd lost his respected position

"Agent Vaughn, you are Director of the L.A Joint Task Force, are you not, sir?" another woman that frighteningly reminded him of Betty Harlow, his first supervisor in his CIA career, demanded. Vaughn knew that everyone in the office knew very well who he was. They just wanted him to state it then demand if his recent actions were behavior the board should expect of a CIA director.

He could only pray that his body didn't suddenly speed up his production of perspiration.

"Temporarily ma'am. I have only been asked back to my former office because we now have fugitive former Agent Sydney Bristow, in our custody. My normal work centers around the new office in District of Columbia, Washington D.C," he replied truthfully, struggling to keep himself in check. He wished he could loosen his tie, but he didn't. That would indicate he was nervous and he couldn't give them any reason to indicate he wasn't the right man for the job.

And he certainly wasn't about to give Will that satisfaction.

He still couldn't believe Will had reported him. He remembered him vaguely screaming that he would but it had come off as a threat. But no, after being released from the guards grasps, it seemed the high on himself analyst had wasted no time in getting through to the proper channels to report why he'd really not shown up at the office.

But still, weren't he and Will friends? Despite what had happened to Sydney, he'd thought Will had that much respect for him to talk to him first, allow him an explanation when they were both calmer.

Apparently he'd been wrong about Tipping.

But then, Will probably thought the same thing about him. And the Vaughn from five years ago wouldn't have dreamed or thought of doing what he'd done to Sydney.

"State your full name for the party present, would you sir, followed by your current title."

Though this sounded redundant at best, Vaughn obliged without a second thought. "Michael Christophe Vaughn, I'm the Director of the Washington D.C office," he stated firmly, coming to attention.

He knew that they were playing mind games with him to psyche him out. And he wasn't about to give them that satisfaction either.

"Agent Michael Vaughn," a Kendall type boomed, coming to a stand, his hands gripping the table so hard that his knuckles turned white and made the whole table shake. "I am going to read you the "charges," incidents, if you will, that let to your behavioral hearing today. If you have any objections, please hold them till the end."

Vaughn made himself look as unemotional as possible. "Yes sir."

"Agent Vaughn, two years ago, you became the Director of the Joint Task Force in Washington D.C, and it actually came as no surprise as your reputation proceeds you. Your countless years of working for the United States Government has been solid."

There was a pause and Michael pondered whether he should thank them for the nice comment. He thought better and remained silent.

"And then once again, you proved yourself capable of taking on more responsibility. It's been less than three years and already, you've organized the newly-created Washington office into something that very much resembles our very efficient L.A office," the Kendall type continued. "Your father would have been proud."

This comment Vaughn couldn't let go without commenting. "Despite the current circumstances, I thank you for your saying that."

The Kendall type nodded his bald- head to acknowledge him then rustled some more papers.

Michael quickly shot a look at Will who was looking like he wanted to jump up and demand why they were praising him.

The spokesperson seemed to notice because what he said next was far from praise.

"Having pointed our your excellent record, that is the reason it is so shocking that we would have to call this meeting. And to do this efficiently, we decided we should focus on what caused the downfall in your work performance," he then paused before adding very delicately, "You were in the beginning, former Agent Sydney Bristow's handler, were you not?"

Vaughn trembled slightly with anger, barely able to keep from demanding where they were going with this. It had only been three weeks since Sydney had returned after betraying the agency for five years. He knew the board knew very well he wasn't emotionally ready to go down memory lane.

"Answer the question, Agent Vaughn."

"YYes," he replied after he somewhat recomposed himself. "I was Bristows CIA contact while she was working undercover at SD-6."

"And you were aware of the fact that there are rules that depict strictly how a handler should act towards his asset."

Michael closed his eyes. They were going to nail him for every unprofessional move he'd made in favor of Sydney. This couldn't be happening.

"Viola, give me strength," Vaughn prayed, "tell me you're watching over me."

"Mr. Vaughn?"

"YeYes, I am aware," Michael stammered as calmly as he could. But the situation couldn't have been more uncomfortable. IF the board was going in that direction, he was sure Will was just about to find out how deeply he'd been feeling for Sydney and for how long. That couldn't be good.

"Well, you may have been aware but it seems that even if you were, you chose to ignore it. Confirm these events are correct: 1. You once gave Agent Bristow a Christmas Present. 2. You assisted SD-6 when they'd been raided despite being ordered to stay put. 3. You were removed as Bristow's handler but somehow you two conspired not only to get your reassigned but promoted. 4. You've followed Agent Bristow to offer your assistance in her own operations, despite the fact that you were ordered to await further instruction, coming from Sydney's father, Agent Bristow himself. 5. You assisted in braking her out of FBI custody when she was considered a national threat. Just to name a few of course."

Michael saw Will's eyes grow round and he was sure Tipping was now convincing himself that he still had feelings for Sydney. Things couldn't get worse than this.

"They are correct," Michael stated, mournfully. "But I'm sure you've noticed that no charges were ever filed. And the results of my actions benefited the agency. Bristow turned out not to be of national threat, that turned out to be her mother," Michael countered, trying not to get too drawn into the flashbacks that started flashing in his mind.

"You okay?"

"You never believed that I was guilty."

"No, you think I'd throw just anyone in my trunk?"

"Luckily for you, Agent Vaughn," the Betty Harlow twin interjected. "Moving forward, after The Alliance was annihilated, I understand you and Agent Bristow formed a personal relationship causing you to break policy several times in pursuit of the woman you loved."

"We were an excellent team, ma'am," Vaughn put in defensively, "I believe my work performance was actually enhance by my partner at the time."

"We won't deny that. But what we've come to realize is that you were the ideal agent, never questioning orders are you father did, until you met that headstrong Sydney Bristow. Seems since then you're having problems keeping your professional and personal relationship apart. I'd have to say you're lucky Devlin was such a leanient director. If any of us had been your supervisor, we would have called you on it and ordered a transfer."

Another awkward pause. Michael wasn't sure how much long he would be able to listen to this and not show the Director's some kind of disrespect.

"Finally, we're coming to the recent events. I understand Agent Bristow betrayed your per your report in July of 2003 and then not too long after that did she become a traitor of our country. She seemed to be following her mother's steps. Finally you were able to let Agent Bristow out of your life, you were married and your work performance once again became seamless. But things went right back to the other way after your girlfriend kidnapped your wife. You once again denied Langley's specific instructions and went to Berlin to intervene with Bristow, taking Tippin and Agent Weiss, resulting in Weiss' current comatose state."

There was a pause, probably a moment of silence for Weiss, a very painful silent moment for Vaughn.

"And when Bristow murdered your wife, you became very obsessed with finding her…and when you finally did, you sought revenge."

Everything being said was true but being stated that way, it didn't sound real. Being read a list didn't describe the emotions behind his actions or the important details he'd written into all of his repots. This meeting made it sound like this was all his fault, that Sydney was a clever distraction and he'd fallen for it, hook, line and sinker.

Wait a minute…he had.

"But the worse of all these events is what you did recently, Director Vaughn. Even after Agent Bristow was medically diagnosed as having amnesia at the Naval Hospital, you ordered her to sign that she would undergo an invasive brain surgery to force her memories that Hq would definitely not have approved. Not only that but you put an operation in jeopardy by not monitoring it as a Director should. Instead, you took Bristow against her will again to the Silent Night Institution and conducted unrestricted interrogation without authorization. Agent Vaughn, do you honestly feel your latest actions are within the qualities of what a Director or a leader should have undertaken, assuming that they can't be also considered criminal?

Vaughn felt his guilt kicking in. Yes, he hated Sydney for ruining his life but he'd allowed himself to feel guilty, so guilty he'd actually considered comforting his ex-love. He'd opened that door and walked through it. There was no turning back.

"No, I don't believe I've acted as a Director should. I took advantage of my position and the trust the agency has in me," Michael added solemnly. I'm ready to hear the consequences for my actions."

Michael noted Will sit up in his seat, apparently waiting for their judgement to be passed, and ready to milk it for all it's worth.

"First of all, Agent Vaughn, we want you to understand, we are not inhuman. There is motivation behind all your actions which we can personally understand, however professionally, we will admonish you for not compartmentalizing your emotions," another older man began, apparently the highest ranking office in the room. "You are still going to be acting Director at your current office and as your office is handling the Bristow case, we will not restrain you from seeing her and we will leave it in your best judgement on how you should continue to deal with Bristow."

Vaughn nodded his head.

"At this time we will also not press any charges but understand that the next time you go against any given order or create an order out of policy, you will be dishonorably discharged form employment with the state government. You can also be possibly charged in a federal courtroom resulting in time for any further offenses. Is that understood, Michael Vaughn?"

Michael nodded his head, even though his pride didn't want to let him. His pride wanted him to demand what anyone else in the room would have done differently, were they living his nightmare of a life.

Michedney, his four-year old daughter and wanting to be a good father and be able to support everything she wanted to do, was the only reason he didn't call Will on his behavior when he saw him smirk.

"Yes sir."

The Betty Harlwo look alike then stood up and walked over to Michael who cringed slightly as her clacking footsteps came closer and closer. When she was finally standing right before the much taller Vaughn, she thrust an official looking black folder his way and Michael took is nervously.

"In place of punishing you for your bad calls, we've decided that you should undergo psychiatric therapy to keep you from making anymore unprofessional decisions. You are to start seeing Dr. Barnett regularly once a week, at least for two months. We've already discussed this situation with her. The schedule is included in that folder. As you are Director, there may be times you cannot make then, but at that time you must notify the behavioral committee and get a written e-mail response allowing you to miss the session. Any other absences will be dealt with swiftly and harshly."

"I understand," Vaughn replied, carefully placing the folder into his briefcase.

The stern expression on the woman who represented his former instructor at the Ram softened as she squeezed Vaughn's trembling hands. "Michael, we know you've been through a horrible time and we believe Dr. Barnett is going to be able to help you deal with the pain, grief and anger so that you can move on and again perform as the excellent agent we know you are. There are a precious few of those Agent Vaughn and we want to retain as many as we can."

That comment warmed Michael's confused heart so much that he was able to look into the woman's clear blue eyes and offer a heartfelt, "thank you for your discretion and for believing in me."

Surprisingly, she smiled as she said, "make us proud, Agent Vaughn." Then she addressed everyone in the room with a pleasant expression. "Well short as it was, ladies and gentlemen, this concludes the behavioral hearing for Michael Vaughn. But we ask him and Agent tipping to remain as the officer of medical intelligence has a few things to comment on regarding Agent Bristow's cerebretolosis."

After that was said, all but two of the board members rose from their seats and filed quietly out of the room. When the room was empty an agent in a lab coat came to a stand.

"Mr. Vaughn, you can go ahead and assume the seat next to Agent Tippin," He said briskly, as he looked irritably at his assistant, who was having problems bringing up the presentation.

Michael silently made his way over to the chair and looked at Will who was glaring at him.

"Do you mind Agent Tippin?"

Will didn't say anything, he only watched Michael descent into the seat next to him with a look that was clearly to make Michael feel uncomfortable and unwanted.

And damn, it was working well.

Hey! Thanks for all your support last year! I'm looking forward to your feeback this year so please keep reading and I'll keep writing. My new years resolution is to write more often because you guys are the best!!!

Here's to another year at !!! Cheers!

Total Vaughn Lover.

p.s as always, if you want to know when it's updated, leave me your e-mail addy okay, Thanks!